In Too Deep

by Mary Connealy

  Ethan only stabbed himself in the finger twice while he changed Maggie’s diaper.

  He’d taken her out of the bedroom she shared with her baby sister, dragging along the diapers, and laid her on the floor in his own bedroom.

  There was a lot of wiggling involved, and Ethan had his hands full until the diaper was in place and he was done stabbing himself. With some pride he realized he hadn’t stabbed the baby. He was proving to be a mighty good pa.

  He took Maggie downstairs and found his very own personal, God-blessed wife, cooking at the stove. It was a wonderful sight.

  She turned from flipping bacon.

  “I got her diaper changed.” Ethan smiled.

  “You did, really?” Audra smiled back. A real smile. Big and so happy that Ethan decided he’d change as many diapers as he could.

  “I really did.”

  “The bacon is done.” Audra turned back to the stove. “Coffee, too.” She poured a bowl full of whipped-up eggs into the skillet that had held the bacon, and the hiss of them frying filled the kitchen.

  Ethan sat Maggie on the floor, thinking to keep her away from the hot stove, and kept an eye on her. It wasn’t necessary, as she noticed her wiggling toes and was fully occupied trying to put them in her mouth. “It smells terrific in here. I like having a wife more every second.”

  He grabbed a cup and poured coffee.

  Seth came in with an armload of wood. He looked at Maggie. “I think she might be hungry. Not much food in her toes.”

  Ethan smiled at his chawing baby. Besides Maggie, he had a helpful little brother and his cooking wife, who hadn’t cried once in nearly a whole day of marriage.

  He could live like this forever.

  Ethan almost got on his horse and rode away from his foreman five times before the noon meal.

  “Rafe always kept the cattle in the south corral.” Steele twirled a lasso over his head and dabbed a loop on a pinto mustang.

  Ethan fought down the need to bark at Steele. He ignored how he really felt and found his smile. He didn’t want to care so much what anyone thought of him, but Steele couldn’t have made his disrespect plainer.

  Wanting to say something, Ethan couldn’t figure out how to without admitting he cared. And he didn’t. Much.

  When Steele got the pony under control, Ethan walked over to him. “We need to talk about how this ranch is going to be run—Rafe’s way or mine. If I want some changes, I’ll make ’em. I lived on this ranch most of the first twenty years of my life, and I’ve got some ideas.”

  Silence stretched between them. Finally, Steele said, “Rafe is a mighty knowing man. He had his reasons for doing things his way.” Steele’s tone said he didn’t think Ethan was man enough to run the ranch.

  “I don’t mind hearing how things worked before, but you’ve got a way about doing it that doesn’t leave much room for me being the boss.” Ethan jerked his gloves off his hands and tucked them behind his belt buckle. “And that’s what I am, the boss.”

  “I heard Rafe is hiring hands over at his ranch.” Steele’s voice dropped lower to keep the fact that he was making veiled threats quiet. “I might go see if he’ll take me on if I’m not needed here.”

  The silence continued to stretch as they measured each other. Ethan didn’t want to lose the grizzled old-timer. He was a dependable cowhand and a leader the men respected. After a morning’s work, Ethan could see they needed to keep Steele at the Kincaid place. None of the cowhands was very impressed with Ethan.

  “Plan on coming to the house and having the noon meal with me.” Ethan did his best to make it sound like a friendly invitation rather than an order. But he ruined it by adding, “We can talk about Rafe’s way and why you think I need to take orders from you.”

  Steele’s jaw worked for a few seconds as if he was afraid to speak what was in his head. Ethan countered by smiling.

  Slowly, with narrow eyes, Steele nodded. “Now, where’d you want those cattle, boss?”

  “Let’s put ’em in the south corral . . . for now.”

  “I’ll get right to it.” Steele was too savvy a man to smirk at his boss.

  Mitch came charging out of the general store in Colorado City, a letter clutched in his hand.

  “Tracker left a letter for us.” Mitch had found it in the mail, addressed to Mr. J. Henry, General Delivery, Colorado City, Colorado. Jasper and Tracker had developed that system so Jasper, or the men Jasper sent, could get the latest news without the letter bearing Jasper’s address in Houston. Mitch tore open the letter and read fast.

  “ ‘Tracker got wind of Wendell. Calls himself Gill now. Tracker doesn’t know exactly where Wendell is, but he’s in this area. Tracker is setting off to start hunting through mining towns.’ ”

  “There’s gotta be ten towns around these parts, all full of men who mind their own business,” Grove said. He looked like he wanted to grab the letter and make it say something else.

  “I got a list of all of ’em.” Mitch frowned at the letter. “Says here Gill’s not traveling alone. That’s why it took Tracker so long to get a trace on him. He’s got himself a family. A wife and children.”

  “A wife?” An evil gleam flashed in Grove’s eyes. Grove had a taste for hurting women.

  “Women are mighty rare out here,” Mitch said, glancing at the letter again. “Children even more. If there’s a woman to be found, it’ll be easy. Even men who mind their own business will mention seeing a woman. Let’s sniff around Colorado City awhile, then start going town to town.”

  Grove grunted his agreement.

  “That’ll take a long time.” Mitch scowled. “I’ll leave a letter here for Jasper to find. He doesn’t want any letters or telegraphs coming to Houston that might get into the wrong hands. If we run into trouble like Tracker did, Jasper will find the start of the trail right here.”

  Grove pulled his reins loose from the hitching post and mounted up.

  “I wonder what happened to Tracker.” What Mitch really wondered was how much money they were talking about. Jasper Henry was reported to be a very rich man. Was the money still in Gill’s possession? Or had Tracker really taken it and run, as Mitch had suggested to Jasper back in Texas? “We could be at this for a year,” Grove muttered.

  “We don’t have a year.” Mitch forced himself to think of the fortune Wendell Gilliland had stolen. “If we don’t find that money soon, the boss is going to chase us all the way to the ends of the earth, and then he’ll send us to Hades.”

  “Let’s ride” was all Grove said.

  Rafe came into the cabin and Julia pounced. “You’re done with morning chores, right?”

  Rafe didn’t swing the door shut behind him, and for a minute Julia wondered if he’d run. She carefully set aside the fossil she’d been cleaning and stood with her very most charming smile. She was learning well that Rafe had a hard time denying her anything if she asked in a friendly way.

  Though he’d sure enough been denying her the cavern.

  “Now, Julia, honey, I’ve got—”

  “Rafe, if you’ve got a good reason why we can’t go, I’ll understand.” She squared her shoulders, drew herself to her full height and looked her husband straight in the eye. “But I don’t think you do. There will always be work to be done around this ranch, but we agreed we would explore in that cavern and I’ve been very patient.”

  Rafe rubbed the scar on his temple and remained silent. Julia knew he was thinking. He was a very organized, sensible man. If he couldn’t think of a real reason not to go down, he’d admit it. “I’ll give you two hours. How does that—?”

  Julia threw herself into his arms and kissed him. “Thank you, Rafe.”

  “You’ll be careful and you’ll stay right with me and—”

  “I’ll be the most obedient wife you’ve ever seen or heard of.” She kissed him again as long as he was close.

  Rolling his eyes, Rafe said, “That I will have to see to believe. Now, let me get the lantern and rope and—
”

  Julia had it all in her hands before he could finish the sentence. “I’m all packed. I’ve got my hammer and chisel as well as my bag for carrying out fossils if we find any we can get loose.”

  They headed for the cavern within seconds of Julia getting his cooperation.

  Julia looked back often, half expecting Rafe to have abandoned her.

  Except he wouldn’t.

  Julia headed into the tunnel and moved fast, leading Rafe deeper and deeper, hoping he didn’t recognize their trail. They entered a disaster. A cave so jumbled with rocks it was nearly impassable.

  But nearly was the key. She hoped to get past all right.

  “This is where Seth got shot and Tracker grabbed you. We shouldn’t have come this way. Who knows if this cave will collapse some more.” Rafe came up beside her. Their torches flickered and light jumped against the walls.

  “It’s been weeks.” Julia turned to him, scowling. “We got married.”

  “We sure did.” Rafe leaned down and kissed her.

  She ignored the thrill of pleasure. “We built a cabin.”

  “If we’d stayed home this morning, I had plans to build more chairs and I’d like to put shelves above the—”

  “We got Audra and Ethan married and moved.”

  Rafe laid his torch on its side on a waist-high boulder, took Julia’s lantern away, set it down, and pulled her into his arms. “I especially like the part where they moved and took Seth with them. I like being alone with you.”

  He kissed her until all that starch just flowed right out of her and she was wrapped around him.

  “Rafe, stop.” But if she really meant that, she’d let loose of him instead of hanging on tighter.

  “I had no idea,” Rafe whispered against her lips, “being married would be so great.”

  “My point was—”

  His kiss stopped her from talking again for a while, until she almost forgot her point. “Rafe, I’ve waited and waited.”

  Sighing so long and hard that she expected him to deflate, he said, “I know. We’re here, aren’t we?”

  “Yes, and I thank you for that. But I’d appreciate it if you quit distracting me. And stop all the complaining, too.”

  Rafe stared at her for a long moment, frowning, his brow furrowed, then shook his head. “Nope, can’t do it. I can let you explore, but I can’t ever be happy about it.”

  Knowing it was the best offer she was going to get, she said, “Well, then fine. Complain all you want. But let’s try and pick our way around the wreckage and go into that small tunnel Seth was so excited about.” Julia picked up her torch, turned and sidled between two boulders, then climbed another one.

  “I thought you found your fossils somewhere else.” Rafe stuck with her. “Why don’t we go there instead of exploring new caves?”

  “I want to see what Seth was talking about.” Julia clambered over shattered stone to her left, to see if there was a way through. “He said that last tunnel led to a cavern that was so beautiful, and he knew I was looking for fish fossils. There were some in there.”

  “We already walked right past plenty of fine-looking rocks.”

  Since he was mumbling, Julia decided not to respond. Complaining seemed to help him stick with the job. It must be a man thing.

  She found a way over the pile of stones, slipping through a gap in the rocks, and after that her way was clear to a small opening.

  “This place . . . it’s hard to breathe.”

  Julia stopped to look back when he muttered. He had a tighter squeeze than she did. For the first time, as Rafe scooted through the gap between the cave ceiling and the avalanche of rocks, Julia really looked at the collapsed cave. Oh, she’d looked at it before, thinking of how to get through it. But she hadn’t really seen how ruined it was. The ceiling on one side had come down and with it piles of rock that almost filled what had been a good-sized space. She saw deep cracks in the ceiling on the side Rafe was squeezing through. Her throat tightened. Had all the stones finished falling? Would another cave-in close off the only way to the surface? They could get stuck in here.

  The small cave entrance Seth had wanted to lead them through on the day Tracker Breach had attacked them wasn’t blocked, mercifully. She was used to exploring and it didn’t bother her to drop to her knees and crawl, but the idea of the roof collapsing behind her, blocking her way out . . . she whirled to face Rafe as he finished descending from the pile of rubble.

  She didn’t want to admit it, but she didn’t think she could climb in that small tunnel. How wide were Rafe’s shoulders? Seth had been prepared to rush right in, so he must have known he wouldn’t get stuck. But Seth was crazy, or close to it. Rafe’s shoulders were broad. While Rafe was lean, he was heavily muscled. He’d fit into this cave, at the entrance, crawling, but might the tunnel get narrower as they went deeper? Might they get stuck?

  The room seemed to press down in a way that threatened to wring a whimper out of her.

  Julia’s chest was getting tight and it made her mad. She’d never been afraid in a cavern before. This was Rafe’s fault.

  Honesty forced her to admit that surviving a cave-in might be at least partly responsible. But it didn’t force her to admit it out loud.

  Julia had the impression of that tiny cave breathing on her. Hot breath. Like she’d be crawling into the mouth of a monster that wanted to swallow her whole. The only good thing about that was she was real certain Rafe would let her quit for the day.

  There could be no doubt about that.

  “Rafe, I’m thinking maybe we should wait until Seth can show us that cave. I’d like to bring Seth back down here.” She smiled. A fake smile if ever there was one.

  “No.” Rafe got that stubborn look she was already learning how to work around. “We’re not bringing Seth down yet. He needs time to . . .”

  She thought she heard the monster’s stomach rumbling and she snapped. She couldn’t stand here by that maw another second. She’d convince Rafe they needed Seth once she was outside.

  She dodged around Rafe and climbed up the pile of stones she’d just crossed. Going exactly the wrong way.

  “Let’s go to see Seth.” She spoke over her shoulder. If he couldn’t hear, he could just follow along. She doubted he’d lag behind.

  “No. I think it’d be a mistake.”

  “Seth loves this cavern.” She had to lie on her belly and scoot between the rocks and the cracked ceiling, and she made short work of it. “I’m sure most of his troubles have to do with the war and that awful prisoner-of-war camp, and those drugs Tracker was feeding him.”

  Julia got across the collapsed cave and rushed into the tunnel. Rafe didn’t catch her and force her to look at him and talk this problem through. She took that to mean he supported leaving.

  It was a long, quiet, quick march, but at last they were outside, stepping into their mountain valley. Cold sweat trickled down Julia’s spine. It made her furious that she was developing a fear of the cavern. She refused to feel this way. She had to explore.

  I just need a different exit, Lord. I can’t stand to think of being trapped in there. That’s not irrational fear. That’s just caution. Wisdom. Good, common sense.

  Calmer now, looking sideways at Rafe as she let him catch up and walk beside her, she said, “Do you really think it will hurt Seth?” She knew, if Rafe said yes, she couldn’t ask.

  Rafe rested a hand on her upper arm to stop her. He looked back and she saw him staring at the cave. “The reason Ethan married Audra was mostly to get her—and even more, her children—away from here.”

  “Seth too, though.” Julia ran both hands into her hair. Her hair had sprung loose and she juggled a few pins around to better collect the always-scattered curls.

  Nodding, Rafe said, “I was afraid at first he might run into that cave and stay there. We might never find him. But I don’t think he’d do that. Not anymore.” He gave her a worried glance as if asking her what she thought.

 
It was the sweetest thing he’d ever done. Because of it, she took a few seconds to think before she answered. “I don’t want to harm him. I know he’s fragile and confused. I just, well . . .” She couldn’t admit she was scared. Rafe would pounce on that like a hungry cougar. “I want to be careful, Rafe.” Nothing wrong with admitting that, for heaven’s sake. “I don’t like that collapsed room.” There, a little more truth.

  Rafe turned back to stare at the cave entrance.

  She tugged on his arm and it drew his attention to her. “What are you thinking?” A faint shudder shook him, and she wouldn’t have known it if she hadn’t been holding on tight. “You really hate it, don’t you?”

  Rafe’s eyes fell closed for a long moment. Then he looked at her with a grim smile. “I hate it as much as I’d hate anything that did its best to kill my brother.”

  “A cave doesn’t have a mind. You’re giving it a personality, like it’s living and dangerous.”

  Rafe slid his arm across her shoulders and turned her to look at him. “You know something?”

  “What?”

  “You’re right. I am. That’s how the cavern seems to me. Like it’s alive and dangerous. Like it has evil intentions.”

  “And to me,” Julia said, sliding her hands up his strong arms, “it feels like it could be a place that reveals the greatness of God.”

  As she said it, she remembered her dream. She remembered the fossils she’d seen of fish and plant life that she thought could be from an ocean. “It’s dangerous, but it’s a place full of the majesty of creation, too. It’s a shining testimony to God.”

  Rafe breathed deeply, then said, “Okay, we’ll ask Seth if he wants to go in. If he says yes, we’ll bring him back with us. With the children away from here, he can’t do much worse than just go in himself—and if he does, we’ll just wait for him to come back. He isn’t going to go in and just stay. My brother’s not that crazy.”

  Chapter

  8

  The screams jerked Ethan out of a deep sleep. He was on his feet and in the hall before he was fully awake. He heard his wife rushing on her little bare feet right behind him.