Unsuitable

by Dawn Norwell

  “Ximea may have tried to convince me that I had feelings for you before I even knew that I did,” he explained.

  She snorted. “Well, it was pretty obvious. The two of you were walking around Nova like zombies, avoiding one another like you had the plague. Only an idiot wouldn’t see that something was going on. Of course, if you had listened to me sooner, you could have saved yourselves some heartache. But whatever,” she said, giving me a playful wink.

  “And she’s very humble about it, as you can tell,” Zander added as Ximea gave a boastful shrug.

  For the first time in a long time, I found myself laughing. Muscles that I hadn’t used in so long that I'd forgotten they were there came to life as I giggled like a schoolgirl. People continued to stare, but I didn’t care anymore.

  To hell with it, I thought.

  Throwing caution to the wind, I scooted my chair closer to Zander. He wrapped his arm around me and kissed my cheek. I smiled- the suit versus unsuit drama would just have to wait until tomorrow because today, the only thing on my mind was Zander.

  CHAPTER TWENTY: THE CONCEALED CONNECTION

  L ife in Nova did a complete roundabout from that point forward. Zander sat with me at every meal and made sure I was served, much to the constant irritation of Rema.

  I no longer had to deal with Jax or his posse in the hallways, as Zander made it a priority to walk me to work. Then I would spend my entire day hanging out with Ximea, connecting over our knowledge of medicine, and constantly teaching each other new things. Our bond was strengthening, and, for that, I was thankful. She was the one person I’d always felt was a true friend in Nova.

  The medical work in Nova was much more fulfilling than my training in Concord had been. Though I didn’t get a lot of patient interaction, I was able to incorporate my knowledge from Concord to help further medicine, assisting in medical breakthroughs that would have taken Nova decades if not for my expertise.

  This helped me gain some headway among my medical colleagues. Their love of knowledge and the excitement surrounding new discoveries helped them warm to me. They were among the first to truly accept me in Nova, rather than just tolerate me because of my relationship with Zander. I was finally starting to make some friends, and like I could find a way to truly make Nova my home.

  In the afternoons, I participated in a physical training program, with Zander as my coach. After the weeks of harassment in Nova, I refused to sit idly by. I wanted to train my body to defend itself on the off chance a similar situation would arise in the future. The muscle and dexterity I was beginning to form from the weeks of exercise didn’t hurt either. With Zander around, I could feel myself getting stronger, both physically and emotionally.

  I also started mentoring Blythe, who Nova scavengers had found roaming in the wastelands after he was exiled. Though I had begun acclimating to my new surroundings, Blythe wasn’t doing so well with life in Nova. He spent most of his time sulking, depressed about having to leave his wife behind. I didn’t have the heart to remind him that his wife had turned her back on him, not the other way around.

  I knew that Blythe was a master of technology in Concord, and I figured Nova could find a place for him among their ranks, so I asked Zander to find him a position. I hoped staying busy would help with his depression like it had helped mine.

  Although I was still getting used to Zander showing his affection in public, he no longer seemed to have a problem displaying his love for me around other members of Nova. Many of them would give us filthy looks, but others seemed to become more accepting of our relationship with each passing day. But no matter their reactions, Zander didn’t seem to care because he only ever seemed to notice me. I had never felt more adored than when we were together.

  Without either of us saying it aloud, Zander officially moved into my room. We were spending all of our time together anyway, so it just made sense that we should share the space. It made me realize just how lonely I’d been until I had Zander came back into my life.

  I was nervous when we decided to tell Athena about our relationship. Though she had been nothing but kind to me since my arrival, I was afraid that she wouldn’t approve of us dating because I was a suit. But, on the contrary, she embraced it.

  “Well, of course, you two are in a relationship,” she said, surprising the both of us. “I’ve known about it for months. I may be the leader of Nova, but that doesn’t mean I don’t hear the latest gossip. You’ve caused quite the stir,” she said with a playful smile. “But we could use a little more entertainment around here anyway. And you two would make the most beautiful grandchildren.”

  Zander ran his hand through his hair, and my face reddened. It was far too soon to think about things like that. Plus I knew how Zander felt about having children. But now that the notion had been put in my head, I found myself smiling at the idea of having a couple of little Zanders running around.

  “There is something else I need to tell you both. Something that I have known for quite a while now, but I wasn’t sure how to broach the subject,” Athena said, fidgeting nervously.

  “Okay,” Zander said cautiously, taking in the shift in mood. “What is it?”

  Athena took a deep breath, bracing herself. “You and Kai met one another in the past, long before Kai entered into our city, back when the two of you were young children."

  I furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “How could that be?” Zander asked, his expression perplexed. “I’ve always lived in Nova, and Kai had never left the dome before a few months ago.”

  Athena shook her head. “There was one other time when Kai came to the wastelands,” she said. “It happened a long time ago, so I’m not surprised if you don’t remember. Kai, you were a young, maybe five years old. Zander was almost seven at the time, as was your brother, Thane, all three of you far too young to realize what was happening.”

  Zander and I stared at her in disbelief.

  She sensed our skepticism. “I know that seems unlikely, but it’s true. I even have a photo from that day, a gift that I would like the two of you to keep.”

  Reaching into her pocket, Athena produced a small photograph and handed it to Zander. I leaned over his shoulder to get a better look. The edges of the picture were yellowed, and the color faded with time. The photo showed two young men, no older than thirty-five. They wore cheerful smiles, with their arms draped lovingly around one another. They were standing in the desert, and in the background, you could just make out the buildings of a small town.

  One of the men had long blonde hair that was tied back into a ponytail and had a large, pink scar across his right cheek. On his lap sat a boy with bright blue eyes and wisps of blonde hair, holding tightly to a ragged teddy bear. Standing a distance away from the rest was another child, with a surly face and his arms crossed in annoyance; one look at the sour expression told me that the young boy was Thane.

  The other man had dark hair, cropped low in a military-style cut, and was tanned from hours spent in the sun. I would know the dazzling green eyes of my father anywhere. I bit back tears as they gazed back at me from the photo.

  Yes, that was my father. A younger, less ragged version of him, but him nonetheless. He held a small, giggling young girl in his lap. She had big brown eyes and brunette curls that were blowing in the wind… a young Kai.

  Zander flipped the picture over to reveal writing on the back.

  Lokas & Zander

  Joshiwa, Thane, & Kai

  Summer 2305

  Though I could read the writing and could see the photo right before me, it was still hard for me to fathom. That was my family; there was no doubt about that, but how could our families have taken a picture together if we had only met this year?

  Unless this wasn’t your first time meeting, a voice in my head contemplated. Could Athena be telling the truth? I sat down on the edge of a chair, my legs feeling weak. For a long time, I stared at the picture, my mind racing.

  The image raised a myriad of questions that ran
through my mind, one after another. Why were we in the wastelands? How had my family escaped the dome? And if we got free, why didn’t we stay that way?

  One look at Zander told me that his mind was just as muddled. His blue eyes pulled together in thought. The image made me glance back to the picture, and sure enough, those blue eyes were staring back at me twofold. It was young Zander staring back at me from the photo, sitting on his father’s lap. I could see the resemblance now that I looked closely. And love, so much love, a bond shared between father and son before Lokas was taken from this world.

  I glanced at Athena, who was watching Zander carefully. I wanted to ask her a million questions, but I didn’t know where to start.

  “When you first came to Nova, Kai, I knew that your name and face were familiar, but I couldn’t place where from. It wasn’t until I was going through old files that I ran across this picture and made the connection between your last name and theirs. It was at that moment that I knew I could trust you and the information you brought us about the Syndicate’s plans,” she said with a smile. “You are more like your parents than you know. They had the same tenacity and selflessness that you project. After one conversation, there was no doubt that you were the child of Joshiwa and Maggi Markavitch.”

  “Did you know them well?” I asked, my voice barely audible as I looked at the man in the photo. I'd barely gotten to know him before he and my mother were taken from me.

  Athena nodded. “Your parents were good friends of our family’s, long before the two of you were even born. Your father and Zander’s were best friends growing up, because Zander’s father was also a suit,” Athena said cautiously.

  My mouth dropped open in shock. I surveyed Zander from the corner of my eye; he may have overcome his disdain for suits when it came to me, but that didn’t mean he would like that his father had been one. Zander’s jaw set firmly, but he didn’t say a word. He stared at Athena, waiting for her to continue.

  She placed her hand gently on Zander’s. “I know that this a shock; I’m sorry that I didn’t say something sooner. Your father didn’t like to talk about his life inside the dome. It traumatized him, I believe, so he repressed those memories. I honored his wishes to keep his childhood quiet, even after he died.

  “Then, when I saw the amount of loathing you’d developed against suits, I didn’t want to tarnish your memory of him. I couldn’t bear the idea that you might grow to hate your father because of his past. But now, seeing you with Kai, I feel you can handle the truth.”

  Zander cleared his throat. “What happened? If my father was a suit, how did he end up in Nova?”

  Athena gave a sad smile. “Lokas was about ten years old when the Syndicate exiled him for petty theft. He didn’t mean any harm; he was young and immature. It seemed an unnecessary punishment for such a small crime, but the Syndicate has never made a lot of sense with their sentences.

  “When Lokas was found in the wilderness, he had markings on his body that indicated torture. That’s where the scar on his face came from,” she said, pointing to the photo. Zander’s hand clenched along the edge of the picture. “He brought back to Nova, same as you were, Kai,” Athena continued. “He was taken in by a loving family who could see beyond him being a suit, to the brilliant and creative child within. Before long, Lokas became an active member of the unsuit community as one of our best scavengers.

  “One day, when he was out scavenging, Lokas ventured up to Concord’s wall. He knew that he was risking death being so close to suit facilities, but something drew him back to the place he once called home.

  “Lo and behold, there was Kai’s father working as a dome guard. Lokas knew that suits were programmed to hate those who had been banished, so it came as a complete surprise when your father not only greeted Lokas with a warm smile, but gave him his lunch as well. From that moment on, the two reconnected.”

  This triggered a memory from when I was a young girl, and I was suddenly reminded of the time my father gave his lunch to the unsuit man standing outside Concord’s wall. A man who had a scar across his cheek, just like the one in the photo did. Could it have been Zander’s father all along? But why wouldn’t my father tell me the man was a friend, if that were the case?

  I knew the answer to that question; he was protecting me. The less information I had, the safer I would be if the Syndicate came knocking. It made sense, considering we lived in a city where machines could scan your innermost thoughts. Telling a child something so important, something so prohibited, would have been like asking to get caught. So he and my mother kept this information from me, hoping to save me from the horrors that would become them. Little did they know that I would follow in their footsteps and befriend the unsuits. I smiled at the thought.

  “Despite being banished, Lokas never forgot your father,” Athena continued, her blue eyes meeting mine. “The two became so close they were practically brothers. It’s why the reason Joshiwa was willing to risk everything to meet us outside the dome. If things hadn’t gone the way that they did, I expect that you two would have grown up together.” Her eyes darted between Zander’s face and mine. “It’s as if you were meant to be in each other’s lives, long before either of you even knew it.”

  She grinned at the notion, but her smile quickly faded.

  “Lokas and Joshiwa exchanged letters each week. They became closer than ever. Your father courageously gave Lokas food and supplies when he couldn’t find anything on his scavenges. He even provided confidential information that could keep us safe from Syndicate attacks, knowing that he could be killed by doing so.

  “As the head guard, Joshiwa was one of the few people in Concord who had access codes to all of the escape pods and exits. One day, he took a chance and snuck out with you, your mother, and your brother to meet up with our family. That was when this picture was taken,” she said, smiling as she gazed fondly at the photo. Then her face turned solemn. “Two weeks later, your mother and father were dead.”

  As I stared at the photo, I was filled with a sense of longing. I missed my parents now more than ever before. They were taken too soon. I had barely gotten the chance to know them before they were snatched from this world. What I wouldn’t give to know the people who so willingly risked their lives to leak classified information to their friends.

  I let a silent tear fall down my face as I looked at the photo of my father, wishing I could see him and my mother just one more time. I held the picture close to my heart, silently thanking Athena for the best gift she could have ever given me.

  **********

  “Are you alright?” I asked Zander after Athena left.

  “Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “Because of what we just heard. Because…” I trailed off.

  “Because I just found out that I was a half-breed?" he finished. "That my father was a suit, and that fifty-percent of me is the very thing I despised for so long?”

  I nodded impishly.

  “The idea is a difficult thing to grasp,” he admitted, “but I’m okay. Am I shocked and a bit angry that no one told me? Yes. But I can understand why they didn’t. For a long time, my life as an unsuit revolved around loathing the suits who gave me this title. Now, to learn that I have some suit in me, too, is hard to fathom.

  “But that anger I once held for the suits, that hatred, it’s something that I no longer feel. I’ve changed since then. You changed me. When I look at you, I don’t see a suit, just one of the most caring human beings that I’ve ever met. If someone like you can be a suit, then they can’t be all that bad,” he said with a wink.

  I smiled, and my shoulders relaxed. I had been so worried about how Zander would react, preparing for the worst-case scenario. But he surprised me a little more every day.

  He wrapped an arm around my waist, holding the picture with his free hand. “It’s like you were meant to find us. To find me,” he said, staring at the photo. “If our meeting wasn’t destiny, then I don’t know what is.”

&nb
sp; I leaned my head onto his shoulder. I liked the indication that the heavens were looking out for me, guiding me to my safe haven, leading me to the man I was meant to love. With a smile, I grabbed the photo from Zander’s hand and hung it on the wall above our bed so we could see it each morning when we woke up, a constant reminder that we were destined to be together.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE: LEARNING TO LIVE AGAIN

  T hey say that every ending is a new beginning, and that’s exactly how I viewed my new life in Nova. Things were improving with each passing day. Confrontation from unsuits dwindled until there were only occasional incidents. Although a handful of people still found opportunities to harass me when Zander wasn’t around, I could handle it much better now that I knew I would be coming home to my best friend each night.

  Something within myself had changed since Zander and I got back together. The provocation from Jax, and others who refused to let up, didn’t bother me anymore. Instead, I made it my mission to be nice to the people who hated me the most; kill them with kindness, as the old saying went. It wasn’t always easy, but I swore that I wouldn’t deign to their level. So I forced a smile with every encounter, even managing to win a few of them over, although most people just walked away, confused by my reaction.

  Zander and I never ran out of things to talk about. He would tell me about his day of military summits and political consultations, and I would tell him about my research and the most repulsive wounds I’d treated. Then we would lounge in each other’s arms and drift off into oblivion until it was time to wake up and start the day all over again. I would say that my life was close to perfect.

  It had been nearly six months since the Syndicate attack occurred, and things had been relatively quiet.

  “I don’t like it,” Zander said, his eyebrows furrowing. “Why would the Syndicate decide to leave us alone all of a sudden? It doesn’t make sense.”