First Kiss Last

by Sara Miller

  “Mom, we haven’t been over in weeks!”

  “I know, dear. It was just me and Leah.” She patted Leah’s hand and smiled at her. Leah smiled back.

  “No,” Leah’s mother drew out the word ‘no’ in annoyance at having to explain something so simple to another adult. “Leah has not been over in weeks either. And last time she was here, you guys made cookies.”

  “Yeah, white chocolate chip with raspberries. Mmmm,” Lily chimed in. “I remember ’cause they were so good!”

  “But . . . but . . .” Gigi looked from Leah to her daughter. She looked as confused as Leah felt. Leah knew what Gigi was talking about even if her mother and sister did not. She stood and faced her grandmother.

  “I remember, Gigi. Come on, I bet I know where your ring is.” She turned and headed towards the kitchen. Everyone followed as she continued to explain. “We opened the window because it was so hot, remember? You were worried the dough would rise too fast.”

  Leah went directly to the sink and checked the window ledge. There was no ring. So she opened the window. Sure enough, the ring had fallen off the sill and had been hidden by the closed window.

  “Leah, you found it!” Gigi wrapped her in the biggest hug. When she pulled back, tears were in her eyes. “Thank you, sweetheart.” She kissed Leah’s cheek.

  Leah beamed. Her heart felt happy to help the grandmother she loved so much. Until she caught her mother’s eye, that is.

  “You were not here,” her mother scolded.

  With hands on her hips and her forehead wrinkled, Leah instantly knew her mother was angry. And she knew why. Baking bread with Gigi that day had been a dream. She should not have known where the ring was. Her mother loathed her dreams and refused to discuss them. Any attention drawn to them always landed Leah in trouble and today was no different.

  “That’s two weeks grounding and extra chores, Leah,” her mother decreed.

  Leah nodded, accepting her punishment. Lily, however, would not let it go. She was completely confused and vocal about it.

  “But why? And Leah, how did you know? When were you here? I don’t get it!”

  Leah put her head down and ignored her sister’s questions.

  “But—”

  “It’s over and done with and doesn’t need discussing,” their mother’s tone ended the conversation. She rushed them out the door, barely allowing goodbyes. Leah hugged Gigi tight and got yelled at but it was totally worth it.

  Leah remembered their quiet ride home. Lily continued to whisper to her, still full of questions. But she didn’t answer.

  It was such a bittersweet memory. Leah sighed. She wished she could go back. To be in Gigi’s kitchen again. To cook with her and to chat with her. To ask her what she never had. Gigi had remembered the dream too. How could a ring lost in a dream, also be lost in real life? Maybe if she’d asked about it then, she would have some insight about what was happening with her and Cade.

  She sighed again and picked up her pen to add the ingredients for bread to her list.

  ♦

  That evening, the whole apartment smelled of fresh baked bread. It had not turned out quite as good as Gigi’s but Leah was not complaining. It was delicious and she was exhausted.

  She had filled her entire day and it was time for bed. Would she dream? And if she did, would it be like last night? If she was honest, she sure hoped so.

  Sex in real life was nice but dream sex seemed so much better. Was it because of who she was with? Or because it wasn’t real? It sure felt real.

  Leah wished she was free to call Cade right now. To chat about her day, to take him a loaf of homemade bread. She somehow knew he would appreciate it. Maybe he’d even have a story about his own grandma to share. But she wouldn’t call.

  On impulse, Leah texted Eric instead.

  I baked bread today! The apartment smells sooooo good! When will you be home?

  His reply came instantly.

  You know I’m off carbs this week, right?

  Sorry. :(

  She waited but he didn’t reply to her apology. She gave it a few more minutes and tried again.

  When will you be back?

  Sunday. Why?

  She sent three texts in rapid succession.

  Like in time for brunch?

  We could go to that new place again?

  You really liked it.

  Leah stared at her phone. When fifteen minutes had passed and there was still no reply, she tried to call. It went straight to voicemail. She couldn’t win. She couldn’t be the wife she was supposed to be or the girlfriend she wanted to be. How had her life gotten so off-kilter?

  Leah tossed her phone on the bedside table in frustration. It bounced and landed on the floor. When she picked it up to plug it in, she had a new message from Cade and one she had missed from earlier. The old message was three firework emojis. He couldn’t mean . . . She felt herself blush, remembering exactly what three explosions he could be referring to from their last dream. His new message was a sleeping emoji. She grinned. Leah agreed, sleep sounded like a great idea.

  Chapter 12

  Leah wasn’t in Cade’s bed and it was not nighttime. She stood in broad daylight on a porch she didn’t recognize. She must have already knocked because the inner door was opening. The outer screen door, not yet replaced for the upcoming winter, remained closed.

  “Can I help you?” the teen asked warily. Leah processed quickly: dark brown hair, tan skin, heart-shaped face, intense blue eyes, and a stubborn stance. Leah smiled. She’d know those eyes anywhere. And the stubbornness was all Cade as well. This had to be Sky.

  “Is this the Emerson residence? I’m looking for your father, Cade.”

  “And you are?”

  Leah gave the girl props. Stranger danger and all that. She opened her mouth to answer but before she could speak, Liam had joined his sister at the door.

  A wide grin stretched across his face and he pushed past his sister out onto the porch. He was quick but his sister was quicker. Just as Liam grabbed Leah for a hug, Sky pulled him back.

  Leah lost her balance and fell flat on her butt. Liam started crying. Sky was yelling. Cade came running.

  “What the hell is going on?” Cade scooped Liam up and did a double take. He stared down at her, “Leah?”

  She nodded and felt her face flush. This was the last way she thought she’d see Cade next. For an average height man, he sure looked tall at the moment.

  “Is anyone hurt?” he asked, his tone in dad mode. He looked over his kids protectively.

  By now, Liam had stopped crying and was bellowing his complaints against his sister who immediately joined in the fray.

  “Enough!” Cade bellowed.

  To Leah’s amazement, both kids went silent. Cade set Liam down and crouched to Leah’s level.

  “You gonna sit there all day, hun?” he teased.

  Great, she thought, because this wasn’t embarassing enough.

  “Kids, in the house,” Cade gestured over his shoulder at the door with his thumb. When Liam started to protest, he added a stern, “Now.”

  Leah watched as Sky tried to pull Liam inside. He shook her off and went in on his own. They argued in hushed tones.

  Cade stood up and reached out a hand to help Leah up. She gratefully took it. She found she was more unsteady than she realized. He pulled her to her feet and into his arms.

  “Are you hurt?” his tone was gentle but she could tell he wanted to laugh.

  “Only my pride,” she laughed. “Ow, and maybe my butt.” He dusted off her backside.

  “Thanks.” She stepped back and he let go. Leah stretched. She twisted her right wrist, testing it, and winced. Cade immediately took her hand in his, checking her wrist and palm.

  “Skyler,” he growled.

  “Cade, don’t, please” He did not look convinced so she continued, “It was an accident.”

  “But you’re hurt,” he forced the words out through a clenched jaw. The playfulness
gone again.

  “I’m fine. Promise. I don’t think it will even bruise. Tiny scrape at most. Honestly, I think it’s just dirt.” She rambled until he stopped her with a quick kiss.

  “Okay fine, but let’s humor me and go clean it up and put some ice on it.” He still looked so stern.

  “Yes, sir!” she teased and Cade’s smile returned.

  Leah followed Cade inside. They entered the living room via a small hallway parallel to the kitchen. Leah tried to give both kids a smile but their eyes were glued to their father. Cade’s expression clearly told them to stay quiet, so Leah stayed quiet too.

  In the kitchen, she let Cade wash her hand. For such a gruff guy, he was surprisingly gentle. But then again, he had two children so he must be well practiced. Especially if they took after him. He was always getting into scrapes when he was young. It was no wonder that he kept a first aid kit stashed in his kitchen. Leah smiled, then winced as Cade applied an antibiotic ointment.

  “It’s fine, really,” she insisted quietly.

  “Hey, you never know what you might need this hand for . . .” he stroked her fingers lightly. “Thank goodness you didn’t hurt your fingers.”

  She looked up sharply and he waggled his eyebrows at her. Did he mean . . . was he referring to . . . she couldn’t finish either thought. She felt heat creeping into her face, sure she was two seconds from being bright red. Cade watched her blush and laughed out loud.

  Hearing the laugh brought them company. Liam stuck his head around the corner. His sweet little face clouded with concern.

  “Dad?” Cade had turned and was handing her an ice pack from the freezer. Seeing the pack, Liam rushed to her side. “Miss Leah, are you okay?” His bottom lip trembled.

  “She’s fine, bud,” Cade answered for her and steered them all back into the living room.

  Liam was not so easily convinced. He sat as close to her on the couch as he could. “Are you sure you’re alright?” he whispered as a six-year-old does and everyone could hear him. “I’m sorry, it was my fault. I’m not supposed to run outside.” His head was down, shoulders slumped in shame.

  Leah used her uninjured hand to lift Liam’s chin. She looked directly into his warm brown eyes and spoke. “I am fine. Just a teeny-tiny scrape.” She looked over at Cade, then back to Liam, leaning in to stage whisper, “I don’t even need this ice but you know how bossy your dad is.” Liam giggled and hugged her.

  “Speaking of apologies . . . you have anything you want to add, Skyler?”

  The teen opened her mouth to protest her father’s reprimand, but Leah beat her to it.

  “No,” Leah said forcefully. Cade looked at her in surprise. Sky closed her mouth and waited. “Now, while I’m sure Sky feels bad that I fell, and she can say so if she wants to, she doesn’t need to apologize for her actions.”

  Cade glared. His face was not happy and Sky looked unsure but neither spoke. So Leah continued, addressing the teen directly.

  “Sky, you did absolutely right. I was a stranger to you. Your brother ran out the door. You protected him. I’m proud of you. Your dad will be too once he stops to think about it. My falling was an accident. If I had been a threat to you, that fall would have given you both time to get to safety. So there we go, no hard feelings.” Leah tried to smile, reassuringly.

  She hoped Cade would not challenge her on this. She could already see it was going to be an uphill battle with his daughter.

  “Now, that being said, Cade, please officially introduce me to your daughter. I’d like to be able to come over safely from now on.” She tried to bring a little levity but it fell flat.

  Cade made the introduction. “Sky, this is my girlfriend Leah.”

  Leah had expected another version of “my friend Miss Leah” like he had given Liam. But he called her his girlfriend. Leah liked the sound of that. Sky’s face said she didn’t. Instead, she changed the subject.

  “Um, okay nice to meet you. But uh, Dad . . .” Sky hedged, “don’t we need to get going?” She gestured toward the door with her head.

  “Oh, that’s right!”

  “Yay! Corn maze!” Liam cheered.

  “It’s our October family tradition. Join us?” Cade invited her eagerly.

  “Yeah, come with us, Miss Leah. It’s fun!” Liam shook her arm with excitement.

  “Easy there, bud. She’s been roughed-up enough for one day.” He turned to Leah, “Come with us, please?”

  “But Dad!” The teen had found her voice. “This is a family tradition. Key word being family. And she’s not—”

  “Skyler, do not be rude!” Cade cut her off decisively.

  “I don’t want to intrude,” Leah spoke directly to Cade. “Cade, this is a family thing and it seems to mean a lot to Sky. If she doesn’t want me to come, I won’t go.” Her voice was soft but firm.

  He started to protest but his cell phone rang.

  “Sh—crap, this is work. I gotta take this.” He had jumped up and was almost out of the room when he turned back. “Sky, be nice. Leah, don’t leave.” He left the room answering the call with, “This is Cade.”

  The room was silent for several long moments. Leah could feel Sky’s eyes on her. She sat and waited.

  “Oh!” Liam jumped up. “I gotta go get it!” He ran from the room without explaining.

  Sky shrugged. The silence felt awkward and Leah hoped either Cade or Liam would return soon.

  “I didn’t need you to defend me.”

  Sky’s tone was harsh. Her expression reflected her displeasure, distorting her attractive face.

  Leah kept that perception to herself. She deliberately responded calmly. “You know how stubborn your dad is. I thought it might take both of us to convince him,” she shrugged.

  “Yeah, ain’t that the truth.”

  “I know you don’t know me, but . . .”

  “Why are you being so nice? Would you really do it? Not go with us if I say so? Dad will lose his sh—be mad.”

  “Nice save,” Leah laughed. “And I’m being nice because I am nice. And ’cause it seems like the right thing to do and yes, I’d not go today on your word. I’ve already said as much.”

  “But Dad wants you to and so does Liam. They’ll beg and you won’t be able to resist them. And why do you care what I say?”

  Leah looked at Sky, trying to remember how old Cade said she was. Regardless of the actual number, she was in that fourteen-going-on-twenty group. Still a kid in many ways but also almost an adult. Leah chose to speak to her as such.

  “Here’s the deal. I like your Dad a lot. And you and Liam are his number one priority, as it should be. Now, I could force my way in but what good does that do any of us in the long run? What kind of relationship would I be building if I wasn’t truly welcome? What if I caused a rift between you and your dad?”

  Leah shook her head. “I care about him enough to not want to do that to him. I’m not saying I’m going to try to be your new best friend but if you really don’t want me to intrude on your family tradition, I will respect that. Hopefully you’ll show me the same courtesy.”

  Leah had said her piece just in time. Liam returned on a run, waving a book in the air. She hoped Sky would consider her words. She turned and gave her full attention to Liam.

  “Found it!” he cried triumphantly. “I got it at the library, a whole book about capybaras!”

  Leah set the ice pack aside as Liam crawled onto her lap. Together they looked at the book. Liam showed her his favorite photos and all the new things he had learned. Interacting with Liam was easy and natural. She glanced at Sky and found the girl watching them. Sky’s gaze was just as harsh as it had been on the porch when she perceived Leah as a threat. Apparently, Sky’s feelings about her had not wavered.

  Leah sighed. An uphill battle, indeed.

  Chapter 13

  “Okay, I’m back. Sorry, I have a small crew doing a side project today and they had a couple questions. Ready to go?”

  “I’ll get my
jacket!” Liam quickly scampered off.

  “Use the bathroom before we go!” Cade called after him. Shrugging, as if he may or may not have been heard.

  “I’m ready,” Sky stood. She crossed her arms and looked at Leah expectantly.

  Leah rose and went to Cade. He took her injured hand in his, turning it over to check her scraped palm.

  “It’s fine,” she insisted.

  Cade searched her face. Leah thought he might insist she join them. Instead, he sighed and pulled her close, his hands resting low on her hips. He leaned his forehead against hers.

  “Leah,” his voice was barely audible.

  She lifted her head, placed her palm to his cheek, and kissed him gently. Leah wished she could stay but knew what she needed to do. Disengaging from Cade, she stepped back. “I’ll see you later.”

  She turned to Sky, “It was nice to finally meet you, even if in such an unexpected way.” Leah took a few steps toward the door and called out, “Bye, Liam. See you later!” As she headed to the hall, Liam came running.

  “Wait!” He barreled into her for a hug, clearly disappointed she was leaving.

  She tousled Liam’s blond hair and told him to have fun. Leah allowed herself one more look at Cade. She met his blue eyes. He was no happier than his son. When no one spoke, Leah nodded and moved toward the door. She turned the handle and was pulling the door open when she heard it.

  “Wait.”

  It was Sky who spoke this time. Leah turned and saw Sky had followed her. Cade stood farther back with a teary-eyed Liam in his arms. Sky looked uncomfortable. “I guess you can come if you want,” she shrugged.

  “Are you sure?” Leah double-checked. Cade came up behind his daughter. When she nodded, he put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. She looked up and gave her dad an uneasy smile.

  “So we are all going?” Liam asked hopefully, still sniffling.