Broken and Beautiful

by Ryan, Kendall

  “He’s not looking this way anymore. What did you say?” she asks, sounding relieved.

  “What I had to.” I pull her chair to me and kiss her, taking my time to enjoy the feel of her lips on mine. I went too long without this feeling and I’ll never let that happen again. “How about some dessert?”

  “I think I just had it, Jensen.” She smiles against my lips, before backing away and running her tongue over her lips. “But I have room for more.” The way her eyes light up when I hand her the dessert menu makes me want to buy her to the whole damn restaurant.

  After Cami finishes her second dessert—the glazed cake I made her order because I knew she’d love it—I pay the bill and exit the restaurant.

  Everything about tonight has gone perfectly. Then Lucas and his girlfriend get out of his Mazda and head our way. He’s looking at Cami, so I pull her close to me. “Stay behind me,” I whisper.

  I have some shit to say to Lucas. Shit I wouldn’t say if it weren’t for Cami opening my eyes the other night. I’ve let that piece of shit walk all over me since the night his sister died. I’ve let him put the blame on me and make me believe it myself, all because he was grieving for his sister.

  That’s changing tonight.

  “Blake,” he seethes, eyeing me over with his usual hate. “You might want to keep walking.”

  “I don’t fucking think so, Lucas.” I crack my neck and get in his face, backing him up with a bump from my chest. “You blaming me for what happened to Katherine ends right now. We both know I did everything to help your sister. Every fucking thing, and it still wasn’t enough. If I hadn’t been there for those seven years looking after her and helping her with Benny, taking her to meetings and getting her the care she needed, we both know what would’ve happened. So fuck you for getting in my head and making me believe her death was on me.”

  “You’re pushing it, Jensen.” He pushes my chest to create some space between us, but I immediately move back in, closing it. “You have huge fucking balls to say this shit to me and not think I’ll lay you out.”

  I let out a humorless laugh and look him directly in the eyes. “Give it your best shot, Lucas. You got in my head and I took your shit, because I thought I deserved it. I thought I deserved the emptiness I felt, but not anymore. I’m not the one to blame. Where were you all those years? Huh? We all did the best we could. It just took me a long damn time to see it. Like me or hate me, but I’m done hating myself. So stay the fuck out of my way.”

  Lucas doesn’t say shit as I grab Cami’s hand and walk away. He doesn’t know what to say, because deep down he knows I wasn’t to blame. He just wanted someone else to blame other than Katherine.

  When we get to my truck, I grab the steering wheel and squeeze, trying to keep my shit together. Bumping into him has me on edge, but it felt good saying what I had to say. We were best friends once. Then enemies. Who knows after tonight. But at least he knows I’m not the one to blame, and maybe one day he’ll admit it.

  Cami gently touches my arm, before placing a kiss on it. “You did good, Jensen. Really good. Look at me.” She grabs my face and I look at her. “You’re a good person and a great fucking man. I’m lucky to have you as mine. I want you to know that.”

  Her words squeeze my cold heart, warming it more than she already has since coming into my life almost two months ago. I run my hands through her hair, before leaning in to kiss her on the lips. “My place or yours?”

  “As long as I’m with you, it doesn’t matter.”

  “I was hoping you’d say that.”

  Cami has no idea what she’s done to me. She has no idea just how much I fucking love her.

  Cami

  As much as I loved Jensen taking me out tonight, after such a long day it feels good to be alone with him. I like having him to myself. I don’t care what we do or how we spend the rest of the night as long as we’re together.

  I feel closer to him than I have since we met, and I’m close to slipping up and telling him how I truly feel. I’m not sure how much longer I can go without letting him know I’ve fallen in love with him. I’ve fallen in love with Jensen Blake, the asshole landlord, and I wouldn’t change the way I feel for anything.

  I’m in the middle of unzipping my dress and slipping out of it when Jensen appears in the doorway and leans against it, his strong arms crossed.

  He looks incredibly sexy, and the way he’s looking at me like he wants to claim me as his has me slowly undressing for his pleasure. When he looks at me, I feel sexy and wanted, and that’s something I never truly felt when I dated Douglas. Jensen is everything Douglas never was and everything I never knew I wanted.

  “Shit, Cami.” He steps into the room and unbuttons the top of his black button-down shirt. I can’t pull my eyes away from his firm chest as he slowly continues his way down to the last button. “You have no idea how good I’m about to make you feel.”

  “Show me,” I whisper. “I want all of you, Jensen.” With my eyes on him, I continue to undress myself, but before I make it to my panties, he picks me up and lays me on the bed. He slowly spreads my thighs and runs his hands between them, checking to see how wet I am for him. It’s something he loves to do, and just like always, I’m soaked.

  “Fuck me, Cami. You have it. You have for a long time now.” He grabs my panties and slides them down my legs, kissing my body all the way down to my feet. “I love everything about you.” He works his way back up my body, stopping on my breasts. “You have no idea what you’ve done to me. You got my heart beating again.”

  I cup his face as he moves up my body to lay between my legs. The moment his eyes meet mine I’m a complete mess of emotions. His icy blues do things to me. They have since the beginning. “I can say the same about you,” I whisper.

  “You made me fall in love with you, Cami.” My heart stops and I forget how to breathe for a second. “I mean that. I hope you’ll let me show you.” He cups my face and locks eyes with me. “I want you to feel how much, Cami.”

  “Show me.” I close my eyes and dig my fingers into his shoulders when he slides into me and stops, wanting to make sure he’s not hurting me. It’s like he wants to be gentle this time. He’s never been gentle before, and it has me turning to complete mush.

  “I love you too, Jensen,” I whisper against his lips. “We belong together. I believe that with my whole heart.”

  Unlike any time in the past, he makes love to me this time. Sweaty, hot and panting love. Nothing about this moment feels dirty. Everything about it feels just right. From the way he slowly enters me over and over again to the way his mouth never leaves mine for longer than a few seconds.

  He enters me deep each time. His mouth hot and demanding on mine, showing me just how his I am. Each time he stretches me, I dig into his flesh and moan into his mouth, him catching my moans and growling out his own pleasure.

  We’ve spent the entire night with our bodies tangled together as he takes me over and over again, like he can’t make love to me enough. And I feel the same way. He possessively fills me with his cum each time, and each time I want more and more of this man.

  I would spend the rest of my life in this moment with him if I could, and the way he’s taking me and owning me so deeply, I know he feels the same way.

  Jensen Blake now owns me completely, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.

  Epilogue

  Jensen

  2 YEARS LATER

  It’s early in the morning—too early to be awake—so when I wake up to find the spot beside me empty, I head down the hall knowing exactly where to find Cami. It’s where I’ve been finding her for the last few months whenever she wakes up before me.

  My heart fucking squeezes when I get to the doorway to see her folding the pile of clothes she’s gone through a million times now but can’t get enough of. She’s so fucking beautiful doing it too. It’s moments like these I love and live for. It’s her that I love and live for. Every fucking moment with her softens my hear
t and heals me day by day.

  Her long blonde hair is piled high on top of her head with little strands falling over her glowing face as she goes to reach for another item of clothing. She stops and smiles when she notices me leaning against the doorframe, watching her like I always do when I find her here. “What are you doing awake, gorgeous? It’s early.”

  I uncross my arms and step into the room, grabbing her by the hips to pull her against me. The warmth of her body instantly melts my heart. I swear I can’t get enough of this woman. Each day we’re together, I love her more and more. My love for her is so strong that it fucking hurts my chest sometimes. “Looking for my fucking wife. Again.”

  Her smile widens as she reaches up to wrap her arms around my neck and pull me in close. From the way she’s looking at me, it’s clear her love for me runs as deeply as mine does for her. Good. Because she’s stuck with me now, and I make sure to remind her of that as often as possible. “Miss me already, Husband? I’m not going anywhere that’s not in the same home as you. Ever. That’s a promise. You’re stuck with me,” she teases, before I can say the very same line.

  Wrapping my hands into the back of her hair, I lean in to brush my lips over hers. She really has no idea just how much I love her. No words will ever be enough to describe it. But I sure as hell plan to spend the rest of my life showing her. “I always fucking miss you and you know it.”

  I grab the pink onesie out of her hand that’s still hanging over my shoulder, and drape it over the crib railing. “I miss her too.” I place my hand on her swollen belly. She’s eight months along. The day I found out she was carrying my child was the best day of my life, outside of her agreeing to marry my demanding asshole self. “You know I don’t like waking up without my girls close to me. I can’t handle that shit, Cami. I need you close to me so I can protect my girls.”

  “From what?” She laughs, while playing with the bottom of my hair, her green eyes studying mine. “From this big, beautiful house that you helped build for our family? There’s no safer place in the world for us than here with you, my husband. The best one I could ever ask for. I love you so damn much it hurts, Jensen.” Her eyes close when I brush my lips over hers. “I truly do, and I don’t know what I’d do without you. You do so much for us,” she whispers. “You’re going to be a great father, Jensen. The best in the world, and I can’t wait for us to meet our baby girl.”

  I tilt her chin up and suck her bottom lip into my mouth, gently nibbling it before releasing it. “Fuck, I love it when you say that, baby. Say it again,” I push, needing to hear it from her, because her thoughts and opinion mean more to me than anyone else’s.

  “You’re going to be a great father,” she repeats. “But you’ve been so great with Benny I already knew that. There’s never been a doubt in my mind. You’re going to put all other fathers to shame with the way you love us.”

  “Thank you,” I whisper against her lips, my heart feeling full. It always does because of her. My wife, the woman I’m going to spend the rest of my life loving and taking care of. She’s proven to me that I’m husband material after all. Always fucking have been. I just needed the right woman to come along and break down my walls. “Now come back to bed. We have a houseful of people to entertain in less than...” I look at the clock to check the time. “Six hours. Come lay down, so I can take care of my wife.”

  She nods. “I think I can handle that.” She runs her hands over my bare chest and lets out a sexy little growl. “You really need to stop working out every day. Do you have any idea how hard it is to look at you and not want you every second of the day?”

  I nod and bite my bottom lip, my eyes devouring my beautiful wife. “Trust me, I know the feeling. Too bad I’m too much to handle in bed.”

  She slaps my chest and laughs. “Still so damn cocky. I was crazy to think that’d ever go away.”

  “Did you want it to?” I ask, looking her in the eyes.

  “Never,” she admits. “It’s who you are and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I love you exactly the way you are. Your cockiness is part of the man I fell in love with. A huge part,” she adds. “A very huge part.”

  “Say huge again,” I tease, before nibbling her shoulder and placing kisses over it. “I love it when you describe me with words like huge.”

  “Seriously, Jensen!”

  She laughs and goes to walk away, but I grab her hips and move in close behind her, closing the distance between our bodies. “I need you to know something,” I whisper against her ear.

  “What’s that?” she asks, quietly.

  “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met, and you carrying my child is the most beautiful fucking thing in the world. You deserve everything I do for you and our baby. You’ve earned it all, baby.” I place a kiss on her neck. “I owe you the fucking world, and now I want to give it you.”

  “You’re going to make me cry,” she whispers. “Are you trying to make me cry?”

  I move around to look my wife in the eyes. “Never. My goal is to never make you cry. Not sad tears at least. Never sad tears. It’d hurt me too damn much.”

  She grabs my face and kisses me hard on the lips, stealing my breath away. She’s the only person whose ever been able to.

  The moment we crawl into bed, I make sure Cami is comfortable while I spend the next couple of hours rubbing her feet and any part of her body that will relax her. There’s no better part of my day than this, and that’s the damn truth.

  * * *

  Cami

  Thanks to Jensen I’m completely relaxed by the time our friends arrive for the cookout. He didn’t let me lift a finger even though I fought him over and over again, wanting to do something to help.

  It’s probably a good thing I lost that battle, because it doesn’t take much to exhaust me these days. I’m four weeks from popping out our baby girl, and he makes sure to remind me of this every time I try to do anything, even the slightest straining of a hand muscle.

  “Hey Cami!” Benny says excitedly the moment he and Lucas come through the sliding kitchen door to meet us outside. “Is it cool if I swim before we eat? I brought extra shorts.”

  I smile and hug him back when he moves in for a hug. “Yeah. Of course, it is. Jensen spent all morning cleaning it for you.”

  “Sweet!” He rushes off to change, leaving me standing in front of his uncle.

  “Hey,” Lucas offers. “Want me to pick him up in a few hours or does Jensen want him for the night? It’s up to him now. Benny said he wants to stay.”

  “He can stay,” Jensen says, coming from out of nowhere, pulling me close to him. “As long as it’s okay with you and his Grams you know Benny is always welcome here. That will never change.”

  Lucas nods and runs a nervous hand through his hair. Him and Jensen have talked a few times since that night he stood up to him, but I wouldn’t consider them friends. I’m not sure it will ever get back to that point, but at least they’re civil now. That’s what’s best for Benny. “Okay, cool. I’ll pick him up around noon tomorrow. I’ll let him know on the way out.”

  “Sounds good, man.” Jensen nods and Lucas turns to leave. “You can stay for the cookout if you want. As long as you don’t plan on being a giant dick, that is.”

  Lucas turns back around and exhales. I can’t tell what his answer will be, but after a few seconds, he nods and walks to grab a beer from the cooler.

  A small smile takes over Jensen’s face before he kisses me on the lips and goes back to manning the grill. Baby steps. It’s all about baby steps. It was the same way with Ben for a while, but eventually they became close like they were before things with Katherine happened.

  Having Ben is his life has been good for him. Same with having Peter. It took a few months for them to really warm up to each other—mostly because Jensen isn’t the easiest to get along with—but have become good friends, which is fantastic for Veronica and I.

  “Hey, sweets!” Veronica squeaks, looking down at my
humungous belly. “I’m excited to meet my niece soon, which you guys have still failed to give us a name for. Is today the day? Please tell me it is, because I’m going nuts. Plus, I have something to tell you, but you owe me first.”

  Excitement takes over as I bring my eyes down to her little baby bump. “You found out the sex?!”

  She nods her head. “Yup!”

  The guys look our way, our loud squeaky voices most likely giving away what we’re talking about.

  “Hey!” Jensen yells from in front of the grill. “No giving away secrets until after we eat. Got it?”

  “Yours is so bossy,” Veronica mumbles. “He’s lucky he’s cute as hell.”

  “Very lucky,” I add.

  Waiting until everyone is done eating is torture, because I’ve been dying for weeks to tell everyone the name we chose. It took forever for us to come up with a name, but when we did, we both knew right away that it was the one.

  “Spill it,” Peter yells, holding his beer up. “Veronica has been driving me crazy trying to guess. I need it to stop.”

  Jensen laughs at Peter’s misery, which it something that happens often. Apparently, men get a kick out of their friend’s torture.

  “Go ahead, baby. You deserve this moment.” My heart speeds up as Jensen pulls me into his arms and kisses me, before taking a moment to look me in the eyes. This man truly has no idea how much I love him. He’s the best husband in the world, and he’s proven that to me over and over again since the day we got married. “Tell them.”

  Jensen keeps his arms around me as I focus my attention on our friends. I’m so excited I can barely stay still. After it being so hard to choose the perfect name, this moment feels incredible. “Okay. Here it goes… Our baby girl’s name is…”

  “Tell us already!” Veronica yells. “I can’t take the torture!”