Zombie Goes To Camp

by Zack Zombie

  Besides, Nick hasn’t poisoned anyone yet, so I’ve got nothing to worry about.

  Sunday

  BANG! BANG! BANG!

  “Wake up, campers!” was all I heard, as I tried to get out of bed.

  Then I saw Endy next to the camp counselor crying.

  “Somebody is in real trouble,” the camp counselor said. “One of you poisoned this Enderman’s pet Endermites. And no one is leaving until I find out who it was.”

  Nick, the Wither Skeleton, gave me mean look. Then he made a sign with his fingers into the shape of a book.

  I guess he was trying to tell me that if I didn’t take the blame, he was going to tell everyone about the Enchanted Book.

  “It was me,” I said. “I poisoned the Endermites as a prank.”

  “Zombie, how could you?” Endy ran out of the cabin crying.

  I felt terrible.

  “Well, Zombie, you’re in a lot of trouble,” the counselor said. “We’re going to have to call your parents, and you’re going to be on cafeteria clean-up duty for the rest of camp.”

  Cafeteria clean-up? That means I’m going to be the cafeteria monster’s next meal!

  Nick just looked at me and smiled.

  Monday

  Yesterday the camp called my parents and they were so disappointed.

  “What were you thinking son?” Dad said, and Mom added, “We raised you better than that.”

  I could hear my little brother giggling in the background.

  I felt so bad because I couldn’t tell them the truth. But I really needed the Enchanted Book to help save the camp.

  Now, I should probably be worried about trying to find a way out from under Nick’s thumb.

  But I’ve got bigger things to worry about.

  Today is my first day on cafeteria duty.

  And I’m really scared.

  I wonder what it feels like to be eaten. Probably feels like getting thrown into a trash compactor. Or maybe if feels like falling into a meat grinder. A wood chipper maybe?

  I’m so doomed.

  When I walked into the cafeteria, the head cook was waiting to greet me.

  “Hi there, you must be Zombie,” he said. “My name is Flavio, and I am the head chef at Cobblestone Camp.”

  He was a Zombie, but he had an accent, so I think he was from the Mesa Biome.

  Chef Flavio

  “Hi, it’s good to meet you,” I said, not sure if I could trust this guy.

  I mean, he’s been working this long around the cafeteria food monster and hasn’t been eaten.

  Either he’s a real tough mob, or he’s the one holding the legs of the kids as they go down the monster’s stomach.

  He didn’t look that tough to me, so he must be working for the monster.

  “I need you to helb me prepare everyone’s breakfass, young Zombie,” he said. “Here, you hold the pot and I get the meats.”

  What?

  All of a sudden, Flavio goes into the refrigerator and starts unwrapping some meat products.

  Those must be the remains from all of the mob kids! I thought. No wonder I couldn’t find any. He’s taking the left overs and feeding them back to the kids!

  I started feeling dizzy.

  “Hey Zombie, are you OK?”

  All of a sudden, I hurled into the big pot.

  “Hey! You discovered my secret ingreedient. Thank you, you saved me trouble of adding it myself. You are such a great helb.”

  I couldn’t hold it in, and I hurled again.

  “Huepa!” he yelled.

  Tuesday

  Today I got a little break from activities thanks to my cafeteria experience.

  But I had that dream again.

  This time, I was tied up and couldn’t move. The camp counselors carried me to an altar to sacrifice me to the cafeteria food monster.

  Down below, the cafeteria food monster was as big as a mountain with a giant mouth, gurgling down all of the poor mob camp kids.

  Before they got me to the altar, poor Endy was thrown in. Then Flapper was thrown in. Then Creepy was thrown in.

  The camp counselors are all laughing and relishing the moment.

  Then I got to the altar and they were about to throw me in. Before the masked altar person threw me in, he took off his mask…and it was Nick!

  He grinned from ear to ear and then pushed me off the altar into the monster’s mouth.

  As I was falling, all I could think about was how I was never going to see my parents again, or my ghoulfriend Sally, or even my pesky little brother.

  Then, all of a sudden I hear, “HHHEEEIIIIAAAAHHH!!!”

  In a blaze of glory, Steve, with a vine tied around his leg, bungee cord jumped into the cafeteria food monster’s mouth, and caught me before I got swallowed whole.

  We bounced up to the tree he was tied to, but as I looked down, I saw my buddies among the crowd of mob kids being swallowed.

  I tied a vine around my ankle, and Steve and I both jumped in to save our friends.

  Steve grabbed and saved Endy, and I saved Flapper.

  But, as I looked down to prepare to get Creepy, he shook his head no.

  Then Creepy started to hiss, and flash, and then, “KKKAABBBOOOOMM!”

  Creepy blew up, and the other creeper campers blew up, and they blew up the entire cafeteria food monster and all of the camp counselors with it.

  Then I woke up.

  Man, did I just see the future?

  I’ve got to do everything I can to never let that happen, I thought.

  I met up with Steve later in the day and I told him about my dream.

  “Whoa,” Steve said. “Maybe it was the future…”

  “That means we need to do something soon, or we’re all doomed,” I said.

  “Yeah, we really need to go see Glenda, the Swamp Witch,” Steve said. “But the full moon isn’t till next week.”

  “We’ll all be zombie burgers by next week,” I said nervously. “Remember, I’ve got to work at the cafeteria all week, so you know I’m gonna be next.”

  “Man, if only we had some gunpowder, we could make some TNT blocks,” Steve said as he looked at me funny.

  “Don’t even think about it. Creepy’s my friend, you know.”

  “What?” Steve said smiling.

  So I went back to my cabin, hopeless.

  Wednesday

  Today was Care Package Day.

  It’s when all of the campers receive care packages from their parents.

  Parents aren’t always the coolest bunch, but they make up for it in care packages.

  I thought my parents were definitely going to forget my care package, since they were so disappointed in me because of the Endermite incident.

  But, they came through!

  They actually sent me my favorite snacks: cookies, milk, dried zombie boogers and cake!

  Endy got some cool blocks. He got some cobblestone blocks, some dirt blocks, some gravel blocks and even some obsidian.

  I asked him what they were for and he said that they were for picking up and moving around.

  I just looked at him…confused.

  Flapper’s parents sent him some sponges, prismarine crystals, and a target with a bull’s-eye.

  I asked Flapper what the target was for, and he showed me. He put it about five feet away from him and then he stared at it for a few seconds.

  All of a sudden, BOOM! A laser beam came out of his big eye and knocked the target right over.

  “Whoa! I didn’t know you could do that.”

  “Yeah, it’s a gift,” Flapper said.

  Creepy’s parents sent him another liquid Nitrogen inhaler and some baby powder. He also got some shirts and pants, which is weird because the
shirts had arm holes and the pant legs were really long.

  I still don’t think Creepy’s parents understand him very well. It’s probably why he walks around naked all of the time.

  I kind of felt bad that Creepy didn’t get any cool toys and stuff so I went over to see how he was doing.

  “Hey Creepy,” I said, “How’s it going?”

  “Great!” he said. “My Mom and Dad sent me my favorite stuff!”

  Wow. Didn’t see that coming.

  “Really? You like this stuff?”

  “Yeah. My favorite is the baby powder. It keeps me from getting itchy in the middle of the night,” he said.

  “What’s it made of?” I asked him.

  “Gunpowder,” he said. “It’s the only kind of powder that Creepers use.”

  Did he just say what I think he said?

  Oh man, this is so on!

  Steve is going to be so pumped when he finds out we can make some TNT blocks.

  Hey, maybe we can save the day after all…

  Thursday

  Today I asked Creepy if I could use some of his baby powder.

  “Sure,” he said. “Just don’t use it all. These cabin bunks are real itchy.”

  So I tried to not take too much so that Creepy wouldn’t notice.

  I went to go see Steve and showed him what I got.

  “Hmmm. That’s only enough to make a small TNT block,” he said. “We just need to put it where it’s going to do the most damage.”

  “I know!” I said excitedly. “Tomorrow all the campers and counselors are going to be outside all night to look at the stars and tell stories and stuff.”

  “Awesome, we just need to get the counselors by themselves and BOOM! We’re home free,” he said.

  “But how are we going to get them by themselves?”

  “Leave that to me,” he said with a creepy look on his green and brown face.

  Friday

  Today we had a campfire with all of the campers and counselors.

  The head camp counselor, Jerry, started telling some scary stories.

  He started telling stories about humans that used to live in the woods and would attack unsuspecting mob kids and eat their brains.

  He said that it was in this very camp, Camp Cobblestone, that the humans attacked, and it was the first Human Apocalypse that claimed the brains of hundreds of mob campers.

  All of the mob kids were terrified. I’ve got to admit, my knees started knocking just thinking about it.

  Then it hit me.

  Tonight’s the night that they’re going to sacrifice us to the cafeteria food monster!

  What better time than when they have all of the mob kids in one place.

  Then I got up like I was going to the bathroom, and I snuck into the woods to find Steve.

  “Steve, it’s tonight!” I said, “They’re going to sacrifice us to that monster tonight!”

  “Well, then we need to make this count,” he said.

  “How are you going to get all of the counselors by themselves?” I asked him.

  “Well, since they’re brain eating humans in disguise, I’m going to go out there and tell them I’m on their side,” he said. “Then I’m going to trick them into doing a huddle so we can discuss the evening menu, then BOOM!”

  I thought about what he said, and I couldn’t help thinking…

  Steve is such a genius! I definitely want to be stuck with him during a Human Apocalypse.

  Right when Steve and I got back to the campers, Jerry was finishing his story.

  And, the humans are said to have been buried in these woods. But on nights like tonight, they have been known to crawl out of their graves, to wreak their revenge on the next group of young, delicious, campers that would be brave enough to step foot in Camp Cobblestone!

  Right then, Steve jumped out of the woods and yelled, “My name is Steve and I am human! I am here to feast on these delicious campers with you!”

  The entire camp went wild.

  There was yelling and screaming and mob kids and counselors running all over the place.

  They were running up trees, running into the woods, and running into each other.

  I saw Zombie body parts flying, as well as skeleton skulls, and Slime bits scattered everywhere.

  There were Endermen kids teleporting all over the place, as well as Zombies turning white.

  I even saw a few Zombie camp counselors actually jump in the water, and try to swim their way to safety. And if you didn’t know, zombies and water don’t usually mix.

  A lot of mob kids got hurt, but the most important thing was that we saved the kids from being eaten, and we saved the camp.

  And we didn’t even need to use the TNT.

  Today, victory was ours!

  Saturday

  Today they decided not to have any activities because all of the campers were at the Nurse’s office getting stitched up and put back together.

  I still wasn’t sure about whose side Nurse Golem was on, so I just kept an eye on her.

  At our cabin, all the guys stayed in bed most of the day, just moaning and groaning about everything that happened.

  “That was the scariest night of my life,” Flapper said.

  “Yeah, I used up both bottles of my liquid Nitrogen inhaler,” Creepy said.

  “I was so scared, I couldn’t even move,” Endy said. “All I could do what stand there and stare.”

  “How about you, Zombie?” Creepy asked, “Weren’t you scared?”

  “Uh, yeah, sure,” I said, trying to act scared.

  “Man, did you see the camp counselors run away like chickens?” Nick asked. “Those guys are real wimps.”

  That was weird, I thought. I was sure that the camp counselors would’ve accepted Steve as one of their own.

  “Yeah…wimps,” I said.

  Sunday

  Today, everything went back to normal.

  I think the camp counselors thought they could take our minds off of the crazy events from the other night by keeping us busy.

  They’re probably setting up to try again, I thought.

  Today most of the camp kids were practicing for the talent show or doing crafts.

  Creepy was still a bit sick from having inhaled two bottles of liquid Nitrogen, so he stayed in the cabin.

  Endy, Flapper and I started practicing for our band. And boy did we sound terrible.

  When we got back to our cabin, Creepy was in his bunk sleeping.

  “Hey, don’t worry about it, guys,” Flappy said. “I’m sure with a little practice we’ll sound real good.”

  “But we still need a singer,” Endy said.

  “You need somebody to play guitar too, because I’m terrible,” I said.

  Then Nick walked in the cabin.

  “Hey guys, did you hear the dying Mooshroom cow wailing earlier?” he said. “Oh, wait, that was you guys!”

  Then he started laughing.

  “OK, so we’re bad,” Flappy said. “But I bet Creepy’s drums will probably help us sound a whole lot better.”

  That didn’t make me feel any better.

  Later, I saw Steve at our usual spot.

  “Hey Zombie, what’s bugging you?” Steve asked.

  “Botflies, I think,” I said.

  “No, what’s bothering you?” Steve said.

  “Oh, we’re trying to put a band together for our talent show, and we sound terrible,” I said. “By the way, do you sing?”

  “Nope, but I play a mean electric guitar,” he said.

  I just smiled back at him.

  “But we’ve got more important things to worry about,” he said. “The campfire was our first victory, but I think they’re going to try again.”

 
“You’re right,” I said. “What are we going to do?”

  “Only thing we can do is bring your Enchanted Book to Glenda, the Swamp Witch, to see if she can use it to put a protection spell on us and the other mob kids.”

  “Do you think it’ll work?” I asked.

  “It has to, it’s our only hope,” he said.

  “Well, at least we have the TNT,” I said.

  Steve just looked at me with a weird smile and said, “Did you see my new diamond? I just mined it last night.”

  Oh brother…

  Monday

  Today they made an announcement that even after the craziness from the other night, we were still going to have the Moblympics.

  They said they were going to do the drawing for it tomorrow.

  I didn’t really know what the Moblympics were, so I asked Creepy about it.

  “Well, remember the obstacle course we did when we first got here?” Creepy said. “Just imagine that, but bigger.”

  “Does everybody have to participate?” I asked Creepy.

  “Well, they usually have a drawing to pick a cabin from our camp, to go and battle a cabin from Camp Nether Rack,” Creepy said. “But don’t worry. I’ve been coming to camp for three years, and they’ve never picked Cabin Zero, which is our cabin. Some kids think they only draw from the cabins with the most athletic mob kids.”