Hope's River

by McHeyzer , Margaret

  I take a deep breath, and find myself smiling when I turn to see River. “You’re lucky,” I say, pretending his tardiness didn’t hurt.

  “You mad ‘cause I’m late?”

  “What? No! More like annoyed. I was thinking about my revenge on you. Like super gluing your hand to your ass.”

  River smiles. “You wouldn’t do that to me; you like me too much.”

  “Like.” I roll my eyes. “Pffft, whatever.”

  “Yeah, that’s why you agreed to go on a date with me. But we both know you’ve been digging me for ages. I’m simply irresistible to you,” he teases.

  We walk into the cinema and stand looking up at the board. “What are we watching?” I ask.

  “Whatever you want,” he replies.

  “Really? Okay. I want to see that.” I point up at the latest Disney movie. River crinkles his nose. “You said whatever I want.”

  “Disney though? Isn’t that for little kids?”

  “Don’t be hating on Disney.”

  “I’m not. It’s just there’s so many other movies out. Like that one.” He points to a poster of a guy wielding a blood splattered knife. I turn and lift my brows at him, obviously unimpressed. “What about that movie?” He points to another poster, this one is clearly action, with an actor jumping out of a burning building.

  “Or, how about that one?” I point to my choice of Disney.

  River walks ahead to the line to get the tickets. “Fine. But I’m only seeing it under protest.”

  “Duly noted, and quickly forgotten,” I say.

  “Popcorn? Candy? Sodas?”

  “Yes, yes, and yes,” I reply.

  I watch as River progresses through the short queue. I should go stand with him, and pay for my share, but nope, he made me wait, so I’m making him pay. Next time he’ll think twice about being late. He looks over his shoulder, and motions for me to go to him. I stand beside him as he’s paying for everything. “You owe me,” he says.

  “I owe you a kick in the butt because you made me wait.”

  He smirks as he gets his change. He leans over, and whispers, “Lucky I like you.” Then gives me a small kiss on the cheek. He hands me the bucket of popcorn, and one of the large sodas. “Come on, let’s go watch this movie you insisted on picking.”

  The kiss is stuck in my head. I can feel myself burning with anticipation. I want more.

  “So, you’ve told me you want to do something working with your hands, but your parents want you to go to college,” he says as we walk slowly toward the theatre.

  “Ugh, don’t remind me.”

  “What do you want to do?”

  “They think I should do something other than what I want to do.”

  “What exactly do you want to do?” he asks as we walk up the stairs.

  “Anything to do with building. I love it. Any construction stuff, I’m there, ready to help. My parents think I should do something else. Like interior design.” I make a puking face. “But that’s not what I want to do.”

  “Tell them.”

  “I have, many times. They keep saying I should have something to fall back on, because women in the construction industry aren’t really accepted. And they said that because I’m female, people may not take me seriously. Charlie said he wanted to be a plumber, and they supported him. Me I want to build, and they’re telling me to go into design as opposed to working with tools.” I shake my head, frustrated with my parents for not supporting me.

  “I suppose they’re saying this because they care for you.”

  “Yeah, but why is it okay for Charlie to be a plumber, but not okay for me to do some kind of construction? It’s not fair.” I can feel myself becoming more and more irate.

  “Hey, I think you should do whatever you want. Maybe they’ll come around. I don’t know.’

  “What are you going to do after school? I bet you’ll go to some college somewhere. Or maybe join the military like your dad, eh?”

  “Nope. I want to be an electrician. I want a nice steady place to live so I don’t have to move around.”

  “But I thought you liked it.” We find seats at the back, and sit.

  “I did. But not so much now.”

  “Why not?” I take a sip of my soda.

  “Because of you,” he says while staring at me.

  “Me? Why me?”

  “Because I like you, and I don’t want to move away from you. I want to stay wherever you are.”

  I gulp, as I move my gaze to look at him. We haven’t even kissed yet, or held hands, or anything. “I’d like that,” I say.

  He hesitantly reaches over, and places his hand on my leg. “Is this okay?” I nod, and smile. The lights dim, and I move my hand under his to link our fingers together. He leans over to me, and whispers, “I like you, Hope. A lot.”

  The butterflies in my stomach are rejoicing, fluttering around like they’re having a party. I turn, and his face is right there. Looking into his eyes, I can see he means every word he’s spoken. His gaze moves to my lips, then back up to my eyes. His fingers squeeze mine. He wants to kiss me. I want to be kissed by him, so damn bad.

  I move my head closer to his.

  “I want to kiss you,” I say.

  “Then kiss me,” he whispers.

  I move in even closer. I can feel his breath on my lips. His chest is rising and falling quickly, and he’s staring at my lips. I don’t hold back; I kiss his luscious lips. It’s causing my head to spin, I just want more of him. I want him to hold me, and keep kissing me. Movie be damned.

  He pulls away, and places a gentle kiss to my lips. “I’m glad you did that, because I wasn’t sure how much longer I could’ve waited.”

  I’m glad I did it too. Smiling, I flick the armrest up, and snuggle into River. He places his arm around me, tightening his grip.

  “Thank you for tonight,” I say when we arrive at my home. Linking hands with him, I lean in and give him a kiss. But I can feel something’s a bit off with River. “What’s wrong? You’ve been acting kinda weird since we left the restaurant.”

  He drops my hands, and steps back. River licks his lips, and lets out a long sigh. “You know how I was late to the movies tonight?” I nod. “I nearly didn’t come.”

  “Why?” I ask slowly, my smile fading quickly.

  “I didn’t know how to tell you.”

  “If you tell me you already have a girlfriend, I’m going to kick you in the nuts.” I point at him. I take another step back, and place my hands on my head, afraid I’m going to hurt him if he does tell me that.

  “No, nothing like that.” He steps closer, but I back away. “I only found out this afternoon.”

  “Found out what?” My back stiffens as I prepare for the worst. Please, don’t let it be what I think it is.

  “We’re moving.” He steps closer, but I counter. He clears his throat. “I’m sorry,” he says.

  I don’t know how to respond to him. Is there any use in saying anything? With his dad in the military, this is what happens. I blink rapidly, trying to hold in the tears. It feels like my heart’s been ripped out of my chest and stomped on. “When?” I ask with an unsteady, wobbly voice.

  “They’ve known for a while and told me just before I left.”

  “You didn’t answer the question, River. When are you leaving?” I say, stepping forward and poking him on the chest.

  “We leave in the morning.”

  I stand staring at him, completely emotionless. I turn away and wrap my arms around myself. This has all been for nothing.

  “Hope.” I sense him stepping toward me, but I shake my head. The creak of our wooden porch beneath his weight stops. “I’m sorry,” he says in a tiny voice.

  “Please leave.”

  “Hope.”

  I turn to face him. “Stop.” I lift my hand, halting him. “It’s okay, I understand.” I do the only thing I can. I give him a kiss on his cheek and walk away. I don’t look back, I can’t. It would absolutely shatter m
y heart if I looked at him.

  So, I don’t.

  “Goodbye, River.”

  Staring at the coffee Elle’s made, I can’t help but think of that kiss. The way he pushed me up against the wall. The weightlessness that surged through my body. My heart leapt and soaked up every single second of our connection. My fingertips brush along my lips, remembering, wanting.

  “Hey, you okay?” Elle asks as she drags out a chair and sits opposite me.

  I blink a few times, trying to dislodge River’s warm lips on mine. “Yeah, I’m great. Why?” Shit, has she heard something? This is a small town, and everyone seems to know everything before I do.

  She looks pointedly toward my coffee. “You’ve been cradling that cup of coffee for the last ten minutes and haven’t taken a sip. It’s probably cold by now. What’s going on?”

  “Nothing,” I respond immediately, before lowering my gaze.

  “Uh-huh. You know, I might not know you well yet, but what I do know, is something’s eating you up.” Elle reaches out, and places her hand over mine. “Is it the town? It can be too much for someone at the beginning.”

  “I’m not going to stay here,” I say.

  Elle smirks. “Okay, if you say so.”

  “What does that mean?”

  There’s a glint in Elle’s eyes. “I’ve been there, and said the same thing. But something about this town gets under your skin. And before you know it, you don’t want to leave.”

  “But I’m not like that.” Elle nods, though she still appears unbelieving. “What?”

  “Look at me, Hope.”

  “I am.”

  “No, really look at me. I have two full sleeves of tattoos. I have bright red hair. I shouldn’t belong in a place like this, but I do. Not because I forced my way in. Because this town took me in, embraced me, didn’t judge me, and slowly seeped into my veins. It’ll do the same thing to you. You’ll fall in love here, like I did.”

  “Fall in love?” I ask, my voice breaking. She knows, she has to know.

  “With the town, the people. Everything. As the cliché goes, the sky in small towns is always the prettiest.”

  “I’ve never heard that before,” I say. “Nor have I looked at the sky.”

  “Well then, you have to. And when you do, your heart will know this is where you belong.”

  “Morning, Elle, Hope,” I hear someone say as the small bell over the door dings.

  Looking behind me, I see Jake walk in. “Morning, Sheriff,” I say.

  Elle giggles, and her face gives away how she feels about Jake. “Morning. Coffee?” she asks as she stumbles over her own feet to serve him. What is she, a school girl?

  “Thank you.”

  How can he not see it? Is he blind? She’s crushing on him so bad. “I didn’t get a chance to thank you for driving us home,” I say to Jake.

  “You’re welcome.” He leans his arm against the back of the chair Elle was sitting in. “How are you liking Hope River?”

  “It’s different from what I’m used to. Everyone’s really supportive and very nice.”

  “But everyone knows your business.” He smiles, and I can see why Elle is crushing on him as hard as she is. Jake’s tousled dirty-blond hair, and tall frame could easily make a woman swoon. Well, not me, but Elle. He’s a bit too buff for me.

  “Yeah, that’s a bit hard to take,” I say through a tight jaw.

  “You’ll get used to it. This town is like one huge family. Everyone looks out for everyone. And because of that, everyone will know your business, regardless of whether you want them to or not.”

  “Comforting,” I joke.

  “How’s your brother, Charlie?”

  Shit, I hope he hasn’t done anything stupid. Like, you know, sleep with Jake’s sister…or mother. “He’s good,” my voice is strained. “Why, what has he done?” I brace myself, waiting for Jake to say something.

  “Nothing, to my knowledge. Why? Should I be keeping an eye on him?” Jake straightens, suddenly becoming every bit the sheriff he is.

  “No, no,” I playfully joke. Phew, that was a close one. “I promise he’s a good guy. You’ll get no trouble from him.” Jake narrows his eyes, and puffs his chest out further. I can tell he’s incredibly suspicious now. Shit, I shouldn’t have said anything. “Why don’t you come around to the house and meet him?”

  “How’s the house going?” Jake doesn’t answer my question, but I suspect this is because he’s wary of Charlie thanks to my big mouth.

  “You know what, if the town didn’t come together yesterday, I think it would’ve taken me at least a week to clean out the yard. I’m so grateful to them.”

  “I heard about the lunch you put on. Awfully kind of you.”

  “It’s the least I could do considering they spent their day helping me.”

  “Your coffee.” Elle comes over and hands Jake his beverage. He takes out five dollars from his pocket and hands it to her. “It’s okay.” At least she’s more composed now and not a sniveling school girl who’s just seen her favorite boy band member.

  “Thank you, Elle.”

  She smiles and quickly disappears. I can’t help but notice Jake checking her out as she heads back behind the counter. Jake turns forward, and he has a large smile on his face. “You should ask her out,” I blurt.

  “Sorry?” he says in his harsh tone reserved for his hard-assed sheriff persona. The same tone he used on me the night I met him.

  “I mean, Elle and you would make a good couple. Unless you’re already a couple with someone else?”

  Jake looks over his shoulder at Elle, then lifts his coffee to take a sip. He turns to me, and nods. “Have a good day, Miss Sawyer,” he says before leaving.

  The small bell above the door tinkles as he opens, and closes the door. Um, okay then. Elle rushes over, and sits in the seat she was sitting in. “What happened? What did he say?”

  Finishing my coffee, I place the mug on the table. “I’m not passing notes. You have to ask him out.”

  “Hope!” she whines. “Please, help a sister out here.”

  I click my tongue to the roof of my mouth. “I told him he should ask you out. It’s obvious to me how hot you both are for each other. Just ask him to dinner. Here, even. Close the diner early, make a nice dinner and invite him.”

  Elle half shrugs as she looks down at her wringing hands. “I don’t know,” she says.

  “Look, just do it.” Yeah great. I’m offering advice on love. Me, of all people. “What’s the worst that can happen?”

  The little bell chimes again, and we both look over to the door, half expecting Jake to come back in. Instead, I’m greeted by the very handsome, dimple-chinned River. He looks at us as he passes, then does a double-take and stops to talk to me. “Hi,” he says to me, then quickly looks at Elle and says, “Oh, hi Elle.”

  Elle smiles, the glint in her eyes saying she knows there’s something going on between River and me. “Hi, River. What do you need?” She stands and indicates the seat she’s just vacated.

  What are you doing? I mouth to her while River’s back is turned.

  “Thank you. I’m not interrupting, am I?” River asks, waiting for a response from either myself or Elle.

  “Not at all. I’ve got things I have to do. Can I bring you a coffee?”

  “Yes, thank you. And I’ll have bacon and eggs. You know the way I like it.” River sits and looks at my empty mug. “Have you eaten?”

  “Um, not yet.”

  “Hey, Elle,” he calls over his shoulder. And when Elle turns to look at him he holds up two fingers. “Make that two coffees and two bacon and eggs.”

  “I have to go,” I say. “I’ve got to get to the house.” I move to stand, but he places his hand over mine.

  “Charlie’s there. He can look after whatever’s going on right now. You need to eat.” I look down at our joined hands, and he immediately pulls away. I sit back in the seat, and look down at my empty coffee mug. “I shouldn’t have ki
ssed you,” he says the very moment Elle brings over another cup and the coffee carafe to fill both up. She gasps, then smirks. But my heart feels like it’s just been torn out of my chest.

  Awesome. Elle heard what River just said. Which means, she’s going to want to know every single detail. And I’m not willing to share them with anyone.

  We’re both quiet as Elle finishes pouring our coffees, and when she leaves I whisper, “Can you maybe not say stuff like that so loud?”

  “Hey, I’m not ashamed I kissed you. I’m just sorry about the way I did it. I just sprung it on you. But I had to know if you still feel for me what I feel for you.”

  “Look, it’s in the past.”

  “Well, that’s the dumbest answer I’ve ever heard. It doesn’t matter what we had in the past, or what happened. What matters is the fact we’re both here now and we still have feelings for each other. I’m single, and you’re single, and we can finally try to make this work.” He points to himself, then me.

  I can’t even try to deny his claim that I have feelings for him.

  “Try to make it work?” He nods. “I’m leaving the moment this house is done.”

  River chuckles. “No, you’re not.”

  “What?”

  “This town, it seeps into your bloodstream, makes your heart beat faster, it does something to you.”

  “Why is everyone so in love with this place? There are small towns all over America.”

  “Not like this one. Besides, I know you’re not going to leave.”

  “Yeah, and why’s that?”

  “Because I’m not going to lose you again, Hope.”

  I take a sip of my second coffee of the day, trying to come up with some kind of reason why we don’t belong together. “I don’t think my heart will be able to cope with you walking out of my life. And I’m not prepared to risk it.” I take a deep breath, and add, “…again.”

  River nods. “I know I screwed up the last time I saw you, on your birthday. I should’ve told you, but I was gutless.”

  I hold my hand up. “It’s not my business.”

  “Hope, you have to know, she and I…”

  “Stop. I don’t want to know. You told me you’re single, and I’m happy for you. But what happened…” I shake my head. “It’s not my business.”