Desire & Denial (Southern Boys Book 3)

by K. C. Wells

  Chaz hugged him back. “Yeah,” he said quietly, his face in Jon’s neck. Not that the thought of ditching the condoms hadn’t crossed his mind once or twice.

  When Chaz let go, Jon gave him a questioning glance. “You happy?”

  He grinned. “Like you wouldn’t believe.”

  Jon’s lips twitched. “Just don’t start sharin’ details, okay?”

  “Deal.” Chaz crossed his fingers out of sight. He wasn’t planning on sharing details exactly…

  Jon pointed to the rag. “Well, if you’re gonna help, let’s get movin’.”

  Chaz nodded, his mind already racing ahead. He had an idea brewing, and he couldn’t wait for Kendis’s lunch break to discuss it with him.

  Kendis washed his hands, then went in search of the lunch Jon had put together for him. That man is so sweet. Not to mention kind, thoughtful…

  You forgot sexy as fuck.

  Yeah, there was that too…

  In the workshop there was no sign of Chance and Logan. Kendis figured they’d slipped out for a smoke. Mr. Temple was in the office. Kendis grabbed his bag, got out his phone, and called Chaz. “Okay, you got me for five minutes before I eat. What was so all fired important it couldn’t wait till I’m done this evening?” He’d gotten Chaz’s text earlier in the morning.

  “Maybe you’re not crazy.”

  “Huh?”

  “Maybe Jon ain’t so straight.”

  Okay, that got his attention. “Explain.”

  “I talked to Del about Jon. I didn’t learn anything, but—”

  “Then what makes you say he’s not straight?”

  “Listen, will ya? I didn’t once mention a girlfriend—but then neither did Del. I did learn Jon has a whole bunch of tattoos.”

  “Oh, well there you go. If he has tattoos, he must be gay, right?” Kendis rolled his eyes.

  “He checked out my junk too. More than once.”

  Kendis stilled. “Seriously?”

  “Uh-huh. I even got him to flex for me.”

  He bit his lip. “I see.” Kendis sighed. “Look, this still doesn’t make sense. If he’s gay, why would he not come out? We wouldn’t give him grief over it, would we?”

  “We wouldn’t—others might. Besides, which is easier, coming out at our age, or in your late thirties?”

  Kendis’s heart ached at the thought of Jon not being able to be himself. “If we’re right… we need to help him.”

  A pause. “You like him, don’t you?”

  “Stupid question. Of course I like him.”

  “No, I mean you really like him. Like… you’re crushin’ on him.”

  Holy fuck. Kendis’s throat seized and his pulse raced.

  The door to the workshop opened, and Chance and Logan came back inside.

  “I can’t talk about this now,” Kendis said quietly.

  “Fine. I’ll meet you after work. We can talk about it then over coffee. Okay?”

  Shit. He’s not gonna take no for an answer. “Okay. I gotta go.” Kendis disconnected, his heart hammering. Lord, I am so wicked. How else could Kendis describe it, when he’d just spent a night with one guy and was thinking about another? Whatever happened to being faithful?

  One thing felt certain. Chaz isn’t going to understand. Hell, Kendis wasn’t even sure he did.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Jon drove the truck onto Del’s driveway and switched off the engine. Del’s truck was parked in front of the garage door. There was no sign of a police vehicle or a bike, so Jon figured Taylor wasn’t around.

  Gotta face him sometime. Jon owed him an apology as much as Del. Let’s deal with one apology at a time, yeah?

  He grabbed the bottle, walked up to the front door and rang the bell, trying his best to ignore the butterflies in his belly. He caught footsteps approaching, and he drew in a deep breath.

  Here we go.

  The door opened, and Del stood there holding a hammer.

  “Do you always open your door like this, or is that just for me?” Jon indicated the hammer with a nod of his head.

  Del huffed. “I’m fixing the bed.”

  Jon smirked. “You guys broke it? That must’ve been one hell of a night.”

  Del rolled his eyes. “Get your ass in here.” He stood aside and Jon stepped into the house. Del closed the door. “And it’s not how it sounds.”

  “Oh, I’m sure it is.” Jon grinned. “Just spare me the details, all right?”

  Del went into the kitchen. “There’s coffee on. You want some?” He put down the hammer on the countertop.

  “Please.”

  Del glanced down at Jon’s hand. He beamed. “Is that for me?”

  Jon rolled his eyes. “Now, why else would I be carryin’ a bottle of Jack?” He held it out. “Happy birthday.” Making peace today of all days had to be the right way to go.

  Del took the bottle. “My favorite.” He set it down next to the hammer before looking Jon in the eye. “Thank you.”

  “You didn’t think I’d forgotten, did ya?”

  Del bit his lip. That was answer enough.

  Jon shook his head. Del was all he had in the world. Like he’d let anything sour things between them for too long. Family is important.

  “How you doin’?” he asked as Del got two mugs from a cabinet.

  Del shrugged. He glanced at the living area. “I’m ready for the holidays, as you can tell.”

  Jon chuckled. “No shit.” As if anyone could miss that tree. “You don’t think it’s a little on the small side?” Hell, the star on the top was scraping the ceiling.

  “Taylor chose it.”

  “Mm-hm.” Jon arched his eyebrows. “That’s your story an’ you’re sticking to it. Whereas I haven’t even bought a tree yet. I suppose I’d better get onto that. I still have Momma’s ornaments, if you want some.” Not that there was any room on that tree to put them.

  “Really?” Del’s eyes shone. “I was thinking about those the other day.”

  “Hey, if you want some of ’em, you’re welcome to them.” Jon chuckled. “There are boxes and boxes of ’em.”

  Del laughed. “Yeah. I recall bringing them down from the attic every year right after Thanksgiving. At least before I went to college.” He gazed fondly at Jon. “I guess you took over after that.”

  “You got that right.” All those holidays when Del made a brief visit, and Jon acted like everything was hunky-dory.

  Del poured coffee into two mugs, then added cream and sugar into one of them. Del leaned against the countertop. “Okay. You ready to tell me what was going on the other day? Did Taylor touch a raw nerve or something?”

  “Kinda.”

  Del’s face tightened. “He didn’t mean anything by it.”

  Fuck.

  “I know that,” Jon said quietly. “And I’ll apologize when I see him next, I promise.”

  Del nodded. “Okay then.” He gazed thoughtfully at Jon. “It’s been almost a week. You’re not gonna tell me why you went off like that?”

  “Nope.” His heart was pounding at the very idea.

  Del chuckled. “I told Chaz you didn’t talk much. Understatement of the fucking year.”

  “You ‘n’ Chaz were talkin’ ’bout me?” Jon wasn’t sure if he liked that.

  “What could I tell him? Hell, what do I know about you? I’m only your brother, y’know, the only family you got left, and what I know about your life before you moved here could be written on the back of a postcard.”

  “Not everyone likes sharin’ stuff the way you do,” Jon retorted. “And I am nothing like you.”

  “Tell me something I don’t know.” Del glared at him.

  Jon’s mouth dried up and his heart pounded. This was not going like he’d planned. All he’d wanted was to clear the air.

  Del took a couple of deep breaths. “For the record? I think Chaz is worried about you.”

  “Chaz is worried.” Jon folded his arms.

  Del sighed. “Okay then. I’m worri
ed too. The other day? That wasn’t like you. All Taylor did was joke about setting you up on a date, for Christ’s sake.”

  “Maybe I just didn’t appreciate the joke.”

  “Yeah, I think we got that part,” Del said with a wry smile.

  That was all it took for Jon’s tension to bleed away a little. “It don’t matter what’s goin’ on in my own life. I shouldn’t have jumped down his throat like that. I will apologize.” Jon cocked his head. “Are we good?”

  “We’re good,” Del acknowledged, and it was enough to ease the tightness around Jon’s chest. “Although…” Del locked gazes with him. “If there was something wrong, you’d tell me, wouldn’t you?”

  “If you could do something about it? Sure. Otherwise…” Jon shrugged. “Now, are Chaz an’ me still invited over on Christmas Day?”

  Del nodded. “Taylor’s momma will be here too.”

  Jon grinned. “The mother-in-law, huh? You have fun with that.”

  “Ruth’s okay. And don’t you be pulling any of that mother-in-law crap while she’s here, all right? She’s still on the fence about the difference in our ages.”

  “Is Taylor bothered by it?”

  Del chuckled. “It doesn’t bother him in the least.” He cackled. “Hell, he’s joking about how I’ll be the even older man for all of a week.” Del’s eyes gleamed. “Just wait till he hits twenty-seven. I’m gonna make all kinds of jokes about thirty being right around the corner.”

  “Then what his momma thinks don’t matter. He’s the one who’s living with you.” Jon arched his eyebrows. “He is living with you, isn’t he?” Not that Del had come right out and said as much, but Jon was no fool.

  Del chuckled. “Moved in last week. I guess there’s not much I can get past you, is there?”

  Jon smiled. “Even when we were kids, I was always better than you at keepin’ secrets.” A skill he’d had to rely on for so long. “So when does Lover Boy get home?”

  “Not for an hour or so.” Del glanced at the bottle. “You gonna join me in a birthday drink?”

  “Just a small one. I’m driving, remember?”

  Del cracked the seal and reached into a higher cabinet for the glasses. “How’s the budding romance going?”

  “I’m assumin’ you mean Chaz ‘n’ Kendis.” Jon chuckled. “Chaz snuck him into his room last night. Well, he tried to.”

  Del bit his lip. “Lord, I don’t envy you. When I was their age, it felt like I’d invented sex. They’re gonna be at it every chance they get. And in this town?” He grinned. “That means your place.”

  Yeah, Jon had already worked that one out.

  Maybe now was the time to invest in earplugs.

  Chaz was already sitting at the corner table when Kendis got to Common Ground. Chaz raised his hand in greeting before calling across to the guy behind the counter. “Drew? Can I have that latte now?”

  “Sure thing.” Drew gave Kendis a flash of a smile. “Good to see you again.”

  Kendis nodded to him, then went over to where Chaz sat. He squirmed out of his jacket and placed it over the back of the chair. “Hey.” His heart was pounding and his hands were clammy.

  “How was work?”

  Like Kendis wanted to talk about that. Still, anything to put off the moment of truth. “He kept me busy. I feel like I’ve learned so much, and it’s only been four days.”

  “You gotta work over the holidays?”

  Kendis shrugged. “I get Christmas Day and the day after off. After that, it’ll be five days a week, with no weekends. Mr. Temple says he wants me to use those for some studying.”

  Chaz pouted. “You’re gonna be studying? That doesn’t sound like it’ll be much fun.”

  “I won’t be studying all the time. I guess I’ll be able to take breaks.”

  Chaz’s eyes glittered. “Long breaks, I hope.”

  He didn’t have to be a mind reader to know what Chaz was thinking about.

  Drew brought over his coffee, and Kendis thanked him. He waited till they were alone again before leaning forward. “Look, about what you said on the phone…” He took a couple of deep breaths. “It’s like this. I—”

  “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I made it sound like I was accusing you of something.”

  Kendis became very still. “And… you weren’t?”

  Chaz gave him a speculative glance. “I was right, wasn’t I though? You are crushing on him?”

  Fuck. Kendis wanted to deny it, but that was no way to start a relationship, with a lie. “Yeah,” he said quietly. He waited for Chaz’s reaction, his nerves on edge.

  Chaz nodded. “Yeah. I thought as much.” He stared at the table, and Kendis’s heart sank. Then Chaz looked up at him through those dark lashes. “Me too,” he whispered.

  Holy fuck, he did not just say that.

  Chaz lifted his chin and gave Kendis a lopsided smile. “I mean, who wouldn’t have the hots for him? That beard…”

  “Those eyes…”

  Chaz blinked. “You too?”

  “Are you kidding?” Kendis put his hand over his heart. “He just has to…look at me, and Lord, the thoughts that run through my head. And the way he smells…”

  Chaz groaned, then quickly checked himself when Drew looked over at their table. “I know, right? He smells fucking amazing.”

  It was only then that something stirred in the back of Kendis’s mind. “Oh my God,” he said slowly. “That phone call… where we were talkin’ about porn, and I asked if you’d fallen for a straight guy…”

  Chaz nodded. “And I said lusting after him was probably more accurate.”

  “You were talking about Jon.” Kendis felt certain of it.

  “Yeah, except…” Chaz’s brow furrowed. “Things have changed since then.”

  Kendis smiled, nodding. “You’ve gotten to know him better. You’ve grown to see more to him than the way he looks.”

  “How the—” Chaz gaped at him. “You too?”

  “You’re sayin’ that a lot, y’know,” Kendis commented. Then he sighed. “Wait a minute. This can’t be right.”

  “What can’t?”

  “I’m sitting here, tellin’ my boyfriend—you are, aren’t you? I mean, we are…?” Kendis didn’t want to be assuming something that wasn’t so. Okay, they’d been on a date, they’d fucked… Kendis hoped to God that meant they were an item, because it surely did in his mind.

  Chaz laughed. “Quit panicking. We are.”

  Kendis expelled a long sigh of relief. “Just checking. Okay. So… I’m sitting here, telling my boyfriend that I have the hots for another guy. My boyfriend’s roommate. I mean, how can it be right to have the hots for two guys at the same time?”

  Chaz regarded him in amusement. “Something wrong with that?”

  Okay, that stopped him dead. “I… I suppose not. It’s… it’s not like we’re… married, right?”

  Chaz chuckled. “Would it matter if we were? We both want him, so why not?” His eyes twinkled. “An’ here’s something else to blow your mind.” He leaned closer. “What if Jon has the hots for us?”

  Kendis was sure glad he wasn’t drinking his coffee at that moment. “Well, it’s not like we’re gonna ask him.”

  “We don’t have to.” Chaz sat back and folded his arms. “He’s been checking us out, remember? Both of us. If that’s not a sign he’s interested, I don’t know what is.”

  “I’m not sure why we’re even discussing this. I mean, it’s not like we’re gonna do anything about it.”

  Crickets.

  Kendis stared at him. “Chaz? Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me you’re not thinkin’ about making a move on Jon.”

  “I could tell you that, sure.” Chaz flashed him a wicked grin. “But I’d be lyin’.”

  “And what if we’re wrong? What if we make the first move—because I think it’s pretty obvious Jon won’t—and he’s horrified?” Kendis didn’t think he could face Jon after that.

  Chaz fell silent for
a moment, which only served to ramp up Kendis’s anxiety. Finally Chaz sighed. “This is Jon we’re talking about. I don’t know about you, but I feel safe with him. He’s not gonna hurt us. He cares for us.” He spoke with such assurance that Kendis’s fear subsided. He knew Chaz was right.

  “And that makes me feel safe enough to give him a little push,” Chaz added.

  Kendis stared at him. “What are you planning?”

  Chaz smiled. “Tell your momma you’ll be stayin’ over at your friend’s house again tomorrow night.”

  “And what exactly is happening tomorrow night?” Kendis’s skin tingled all over, and that fluttery feeling was back in his stomach. Except this time it felt different.

  This time it was down to anticipation.

  “Movie night. Popcorn, coke, whatever. Just you, me an’ Jon, and a movie.”

  Kendis’s heart was pounding again. “And what’s gonna happen?”

  Chaz grinned. “Wait an’ see.”

  Which left Kendis with one more burning question.

  What if this leads somewhere? What happens then?

  Chapter Seventeen

  Friday Dec 22

  Kendis switched off the shower, and then reached for a towel. He had maybe an hour before he was due to Chaz’s, and he had to admit, he was a little nervous. That was due mostly to the fact he still had no idea what Chaz had planned. He wouldn’t even tell Kendis which movie they were gonna watch. All Kendis knew was that Chaz was going to see Ellie to borrow a DVD.

  Does he have to be so damn mysterious?

  Not that Kendis was complaining. He kinda liked it, but then he liked a whole lotta things about Chaz. Kendis was the older of them, but when it came to self-confidence, Chaz had him beat. He had a feeling that when it came to sex, Chaz was going to take the lead, and that was fine by Kendis, yes sir.

  Kendis rubbed himself briskly with the towel. From beyond the bathroom door he could hear Momma talking quietly. She was probably on the phone to Marcus, complaining about Kendis staying out at night. Oh, she’d not complained directly, but it had been obvious from her expression that she wasn’t happy about it.