Defend

by Lindsay Paige

  “Yes.” I stand and take his hand. “I’ll see y’all later.”

  When we walk outside, it turns out Brent was arranging for a car to come pick us up when he was fiddling with his phone. He’s quiet throughout the ride and it’s in such a way that I feel as if I shouldn’t break the silence. I decide now is the perfect time to text my mother and ask her when we’re having dinner tomorrow. After about thirty minutes, we arrive at a house full of cars and find Gregory leaning against the hood of his car.

  “Dad,” he starts.

  “Give me the keys and get in,” Brent quickly interrupts.

  Gregory hands over the keys and gets in the backseat while Brent opens the passenger door for me. I watch him briskly walk around the front to get behind the wheel. Things are quiet long enough for Brent to get us on the road.

  “I’m sorry, Dad. I didn’t want to drink at all, but there were like ten people around me, shoving beers in my face and yelling, ‘Drink! Drink! Drink!’. I was the only one without a beer. I didn’t know how to get out of it.”

  Poor Gregory was in a tough spot. I’d probably would’ve done the same thing he did, except the calling my parents part. When Brent doesn’t respond, Gregory keeps talking.

  “I thought about calling Kayla, but she would’ve taken me either to your house or Mom’s, so I figured I might as well call you.”

  “I’m glad you called me, son,” Brent says. “People’s judgment slips at parties and if you don’t believe me, ask your mother where she was when she got pregnant with Kayla.”

  “God, Dad, I didn’t need to know that,” Gregory groans.

  “Me either,” I complain.

  Brent laughs. “So, how about you skip parties from now on?”

  “Yes, sir,” Gregory quietly agrees. When we get home, he must think things are better because he asks, “How’d the double date go? Did you know Dad was nervous, Jamie?”

  I grin and glance at Brent. “You were nervous?”

  “No. And it went fine until I got the call to pick up my buzzed son.” He gives a pointed look to Gregory. “How about you take a shower and go to bed?”

  Gregory looks as if he wants to argue, but Brent points toward the stairs and he thinks better of it. Brent stretches his legs out, rests his head against the back of the couch, and folds his hands over his stomach with a sigh.

  “You okay?” I ask, reaching over and resting one of my hands on top of his.

  “Yeah. Trying to decide if he should be grounded or if telling him that tidbit about his mother was enough punishment.” Brent turns his head to look at me. “He did call me and he wasn’t drunk, so that’s a plus for him. He hasn’t done this before as far as I know.”

  “Sounds like you want to let him off the hook.”

  “No, not exactly. I’d just rather talk to him than ground him. Hey, are we going tomorrow? Have you decided?”

  “Yes, we’re going. We’ll need to leave here at about four.” I still think it’ll be a disaster, but Mom will be happy we went and Brent can see exactly what my parents are like.

  Brent and I ran for an extra fifteen minutes this morning because I insisted I needed to run a bit longer. Now, he’s talking to Gregory about last night and I’m downstairs about to start breakfast after taking a shower. Just as I grab what I need for pancakes, there’s a knock on the front door. Is he expecting someone?

  I walk through the house and open the front door. Oh, great. “Hello, Kayla. I didn’t realize you were coming.”

  Her eyes narrow. “My dad invited me over for breakfast. Are you going to let me in?”

  “Oh, of course. Sorry.” I step aside and wonder why Brent didn’t give me a heads-up. “Ah, Brent’s upstairs with Gregory. I was about to start cooking.” I close the door and walk into the kitchen, not really caring if she follows me or not.

  She does follow me, though.

  Kayla sits at the table and her stare burns into me while I move around and start breakfast. “You know your way around already.”

  I keep my eyes on my task. She technically didn’t ask a question, but I answer her anyway. “Yeah, Brent invites me over a few times a week. Are you excited about the cruise?” I ask.

  “I guess,” she says in such a way that I know she’d be much happier if I wasn’t going. “How exactly did it happen that you’re going?”

  “Brent said it’s his trip because it’s for his birthday and he wants me to go. He kept asking until I agreed as long as you and Gregory said it’s okay.” She opens her mouth and I say, “And don’t worry, I’ve already paid him in full for my part of the trip.” Her mouth closes.

  “I just think it’s too soon for you two to go on a big trip together.”

  “I didn’t think I raised a hypocrite,” Brent says as he walks into the room, Gregory right behind him. Brent comes to my side and takes over cooking. “I do believe it didn’t take all that long before my little girl moved in with Logan. I also believe that in the end, I was supportive of your decision.” He doesn’t give Kayla time to respond at all. “Where’s Logan?”

  “His niece wanted to see him this morning, so he’s over there,” she answers. “Mom’s pissed that you aren’t going to the wedding.”

  Brent shrugs. “Went to the dinner, don’t need to go to the wedding. We’re on good enough terms; I don’t need to go to her wedding to prove it. Besides, we all know that there are some who’d rather Jamie not be there, so it’s better I don’t go and bring tension with me.”

  My eyes bug a little at hearing him be so blunt about why we aren’t going. I reach over and pinch his side, but he ignores me. Neither Kayla nor Gregory respond to what he said either. He lets the silence stew for about a minute before he asks Kayla how things are going in school and with her and Logan. I help him make eggs once the sausage and pancakes are nearly done.

  When he kisses me, a simple, soft, chaste kiss, I don’t know whether to melt or glare at him for kissing me in front of Kayla. No reason to give her more reasons to hate me.

  “Hot chocolate, hon?” he asks quietly.

  Melt. I’ll definitely melt. “Yes, please,” I whisper.

  “Hey, Kayla,” Gregory says, disrupting our moment and causing us to go about setting the table. “Did you know you were conceived at a party?”

  I groan. “Come on, Gregory. I thought we decided we didn’t need to know that.”

  He laughs. “Yeah, but that means we definitely need to tell Kayla.”

  “How would you even know that?” Kayla asks with a frown.

  “Dad was giving me a warning about parties.”

  “Do we even want to know where you were conceived?” she snaps back.

  They both look at Brent as he sits down next to me, placing a mug of hot chocolate in my hands. “Oh, come on, y’all. Last night was about making a point.” They continue staring and waiting for an answer. Brent sighs. “Pretty sure it was a place where babies are normally made. In a bed at home. Happy?” Brent slides his eyes over to me. “Can we end the baby conceiving discussion now?”

  The air deflates in my lungs. I was really hoping Brent wouldn’t treat me any different because I can’t have kids and what he just did makes me think that he worries I might be uncomfortable right now. I’m not. At all. I wasn’t uncomfortable until he gave me that look and asked if we could stop talking about it. If he hadn’t looked at me first, it’d be okay. Because then, I’d know he wasn’t thinking about my reaction to this topic while asking to end it.

  I’m not fragile. At least, not where this is concerned. I thought Brent knew and understood that. Maybe he doesn’t. And that bothers me more than I expected.

  Jamie has been awfully quiet since breakfast. Even now, we’ve been in the car for thirty minutes and she’s yet to say a word. Something must be bothering her. It’s probably the fact that we’ll soon be in the same house as her parents. I should make sure, though. I reach over, grab her hand, kiss her knuckles, and then rest them on the center console.

  “Ev
erything okay? Are you nervous?” I ask. “You’re extra quiet.”

  She turns slightly in her seat. “I need to ask you something.”

  “Okay.”

  “When you tried to end the conversation about conceiving babies, was that because you wanted it to end or because of me?”

  Okay, so the visit to her parents isn’t what’s on her mind. After a quick breath, I answer, “It was both.”

  Jamie sighs. “Brent, did you not listen to anything I said when my mom called me about my sister’s pregnancy and I told you about my situation? I was not bothered by the conversation until you looked at me and obviously tried to end it because of me. There’s no need to do that.” Her voice softens as she says, “I thought you understood that.”

  “Honey, I do,” I insist. “It was more of a gut reaction than anything else. Kind of like when after you told me and Kayla came over. She mentioned something about how we might have a family. That made me snap and put an end to her rant. I didn’t mean to upset you, Jamie. I figured if we stopped talking about babies then Kayla couldn’t say anything out of the way and put you on the spot where you might feel the need to tell her.”

  Jamie’s quiet for a moment. “All right.”

  “Do you forgive me?”

  She smiles. “Yes.”

  “Good. Then lean over here and kiss me since I can’t exactly kiss you while I’m driving.”

  She uses her arm on the console to anchor her weight as she leans over and presses a kiss to the corner of my mouth. With that out of the way, we make small talk about everything but our upcoming dinner. I’m praying it goes well for both our sakes.

  We finally arrive and walk up to the door of a nice, large house. Jamie grabs my hand before I can ring the doorbell.

  “Just give me a moment.” She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. And then another and another. “Okay. Ring the doorbell.”

  I do and within seconds, the door swings open. A woman dressed to the nines smiles, but her eyes judge me.

  “Jamie! I’m so glad you decided to come home. Come in, come in.” She ushers us inside, hugs Jamie, and turns to me with narrowed eyes. “And who is this? I thought you were bringing your boyfriend.”

  I know I don’t look like I’m twenty anymore, but if Jamie said she was bringing her boyfriend and only one guy stands next to her, it’s safe to say he’s the boyfriend. Strike one against her mother.

  Jamie sighs. “Mother, this is Brent Murphy, my boyfriend.”

  I hold out my hand. “Nice to meet you, Mrs. Alexander.”

  She shakes my hand. “You as well. Let’s meet everyone and chat a bit before dinner.”

  “Everyone?” Jamie squeaks.

  “Yes, Michelle and Finn are here as well.”

  We follow her into the living room where three people sit. They all stand to hug Jamie and shake my hand. I meet her father, her sister, and her fiancé. Jamie pulls me over to sit on the loveseat, slightly secluding us from everyone else.

  “Are you sure we can’t go ahead and eat, Mother?” Jamie asks.

  “No. We’d like to chat and get to know your boyfriend a bit better.”

  “He’s good-looking,” Michelle says, winking at Jamie.

  “Let’s not beat around the bush,” Mr. Alexander says. “Exactly how old are you, Mr. Murphy? Clearly, you’re not in college. What are you doing with my daughter?”

  Jamie opens her mouth, but I squeeze her hand. She doesn’t need to answer for me. “I’m thirty-nine.” If they’re already defensive, let’s not tell them I’m closer to forty than thirty-nine. Swear on my life, all four of their jaws drop.

  Michelle breaks the silence by laughing and joking, “Jamie found herself a cradle robber.”

  “Why don’t we not judge my relationship or Brent and actually get to know him?” Jamie says with a hardness in her voice.

  “What do we need to know?” her mother asks with a frown.

  “That I like him and he treats me exceptionally well. He’s part owner of a successful business, has two kids, and he treats me well.”

  Her mother’s focus switches to me. “You already have kids? Does this mean you won’t want more when Jamie is ready?”

  “Mother!” Jamie exclaims. “Don’t you dare go there. You know how I feel about that.”

  “Jamie,” Mr. Alexander starts with a calm voice. “This man is way too old for you.”

  “That doesn’t mean he’s bad for me,” she interrupts. “None of you are giving him a chance! He opens doors for me, pulls chairs out for me, cooks for me, runs with me when it’s dark so I’m not alone, and he listens to me. The last of which is something y’all do not do!”

  “We don’t think—,” Mr. Alexander tries again.

  At this point, I’ve had it. They’ve barely talked to me, only about me. Jamie is talking and talking and talking and everything she says falls on deaf ears. I stand, feel Jamie squeeze my hand because I know she doesn’t want me to say anything, but I can’t help it.

  “I don’t think any of you think at all.”

  “Brent,” Jamie whispers, but I ignore her.

  “You invited us here, asked to meet me, but you’ve yet to ask me anything but my age. Instead, you’ve told Jamie that you don’t care what she thinks or wants. You don’t care if she has a good boyfriend who treats her like she’s one of the best things in his life. You think she has shit judgment, but all of you are the ones being judgmental. Do you really not see why she hates coming home and avoids your calls for as long as possible?” I release my hold on her hand to point at her. “She’s sitting here telling you what she thinks of me and you ignore her. She’s told you what she wants in regards to kids and you repeatedly ignore her. What the fuck did she ever do to you for y’all to not listen and trust what your daughter says? For you to harass her and insist she does what you want for her? From one parent to another, that’s bullshit.”

  “Brent,” Jamie tries again as outrage builds on her parents’ faces.

  “She suffers a lot because of you two and the fact that you refuse to listen to what she says. If I had it my way, she wouldn’t have anything to do with either of you until you got your shit together and apologized to her.” I take a deep breath. “You raised a good woman and she has a good head on her shoulders. She needs you to see that.” I walk to the door and hear footsteps and some kind of conversation happening behind me.

  “Brent, wait!” Jamie shouts as I walk outside.

  I stop to face her. “Honey, I’m sorry. I tried to keep my mouth shut and let you handle it, but that wasn’t working and I couldn’t stand it anymore. I couldn’t let them keep talking like you hadn’t said a word. I—”

  Jamie wraps her arms around my neck and shuts me up with a hard kiss. My arms react immediately, snaking around her waist to clutch her tight.

  “What’s that for?” I ask softly when she slightly pulls away.

  “You had my back,” she whispers. “You’re the only one who’s ever defended me, you know that?”

  “Jamie?”

  I release my hold on Jamie at the sound of her sister’s voice. Jamie turns around to face her and I grab her waist, so she doesn’t forget I’m here.

  “I’m sorry for the ambush and for my cradle robber comment. They’re still trying to absorb what just happened, but I’d hate for your trip here to be a waste. Would you like to go somewhere to eat with Finn and me?”

  Jamie glances up at me. “Up to you,” I tell her.

  She looks at her sister, who looks hopeful, and then nods. “Okay. We’ll go.”

  “Great. Let me grab Finn and then y’all can follow us.”

  Jamie and I go ahead and get into my truck. She reaches over to take my hand, cradling it in both of hers. “I have no idea how my parents will react to this, what they’ll eventually say. But I hope what you said gets through to them since what I say never seems to.”

  “I’m glad you’re not upset with me.” As I was walking out the door, I was worried she
would be. After all, she asked me not to say anything and I did just the opposite. For good reason, but still.

  Her sister and fiancé walk out and get into their car. As we follow them, Jamie leans over to kiss the corner of my mouth like she did earlier. “I wouldn’t be mad at you for what you did.”

  “Good. I’m glad. Do you think this will go well?”

  “It’s always a toss-up with Michelle.”

  We follow Finn and Michelle to the restaurant and things seem okay as we walk inside and to a table. Everyone is relatively quiet while we look over the menus and then we place our orders. Jamie is more nervous than she lets on. She reaches over to rest her hand on my thigh, down by my knee. Every few seconds her fingers twitch or she gives my leg a squeeze. I move my hand to rest on top of hers, hoping it reassures her.

  “How’s college going?” Michelle asks.

  Jamie shrugs. “It’s going.”

  Michelle gives her small smile. “I know you’ll be glad when it’s over. You’re almost there, though.” Her comment surprises me. Michelle actually knows Jamie doesn’t like college? She’s even sympathetic toward her. Apparently, not everyone in her family is a jackass all the time. Michelle’s eyes flick to me. “Do you plan to stay in Raleigh after college?”

  “I don’t exactly want to come back home,” Jamie points out. “But I don’t know what I’ll do yet. There are still some things I need to figure out.”

  “Like what? All you have to do is find a place to live and full-time work. I know you don’t spend like crazy and our parents still share their fortune with us, so it’s not as if you can’t afford it.”

  Jamie seems to think about something as she uses her free hand to wipe the condensation off the side of her glass. “Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe they’ll listen better if I stop taking their money.”

  Michelle gasps as if that’s the worst thing in the world. “Jamie, you can’t be serious. Why would you want to do that?”

  She stares at her sister for a few seconds. “They don’t listen to what I want, Michelle. I tell Mother I don’t want kids and she tells me I can adopt or use a surrogate. I tell Mother I don’t want to go to college and she forces applications down my throat. I tell Mother I’m truly happy you’re pregnant and she thinks I need to see my therapist again. I tell them my boyfriend makes me happy and treats me well, and they don’t care because he’s older than I am. If living off whatever money I make at my job makes them change, they can stop sending me money and have what’s in my bank account that’s theirs back.”