Fair Catch

by Ruddick, Jessica

  Destiny pointed the remote at the TV, but I put my hand on her arm. “We can watch something else if you all want. I was being a brat earlier when I chose this.”

  Danielle perked up. “Since you don’t know the difference between Star Trek and Star Wars, maybe we should watch Star Wars so you can be properly educated.” Though she tried to downplay it, Danielle was legitimately excited about the prospect of watching the nerdy movie.

  Since I didn’t care either way, I agreed.

  She quickly jumped up and left to run across the hall to her and Destiny’s apartment to grab the Blu-ray.

  Destiny put her hands up. “For the record, I had no idea she was a closet Star Wars fan. No freaking idea.”

  Danielle really must have been in the closet with her secret fandom because she and Destiny shared everything. Their friendship story was similar to mine and Katie’s—they’d been randomly paired together freshman year as roommates and immediately became besties. They’d even nicknamed themselves the Double Ds. They’d lived on our hall freshman year, and now their apartment was across from ours.

  When Danielle returned with the box set of the entire series, she spent an agonizing ten minutes trying to decide what order to watch the movies in—something about the first movie in the timeline not actually being the first movie released. All the while, Destiny stared at her like she’d suddenly sprouted horns. It was quite comical.

  Danielle eventually decided we should start with the movie that was released first. I tried to feign interest since Danielle kept excitedly pointing things out and sharing bits of Star Wars trivia, but the movie was too slow-moving to keep my attention.

  Later that night after the Double Ds left, Katie sat next to me on the couch and pulled her knees to her chest. I know what that means—heart-to-heart time.

  “Is everything okay?” she asked. “You’ve seemed stressed this week.”

  I thought about pasting a smile on my face and telling her everything was fine, but it would be pointless. She knew me well enough to see through the lies. The only reason I’d gotten away with keeping my troubles under wraps for so long was because she’d been preoccupied with Wyatt and her sister.

  I sighed. “I have a lot going on. I didn’t want to bother you with it.”

  “It’s not bothering me,” Katie said. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize sooner.”

  “It’s fine. It’s just normal stuff, like school and money.”

  Katie bit her lip, and I knew she was refraining from offering me money. She’d made a lot of money as a child actor and had invested it wisely, so she was more than comfortable. She’d offered me money in the past, but I didn’t feel right taking it. Though with the way things were going, I might not have a choice but to accept a loan. Lord knew I couldn’t turn to my parents for help.

  “Well, if you change your mind, you know where to find me.”

  “Thanks.” I focused on my nails, as if my cuticles were the most interesting things I’d ever seen. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Of course.”

  “Is there something about me that’s… off-putting?”

  A dumbfounded expression crossed her face. “Off-putting? Are you serious?”

  Her immediate reaction was comforting, but since I’d come that far, I blazed forward. “Like, to guys. Adam blew me off all the time—”

  “Because he’s an asshole.”

  I shrugged. “He’s just clueless. Or at least that’s what I’ve always thought, but now I’m starting to wonder if it’s me.”

  “What happened to make you wonder that?”

  Crap. So much for keeping my attempt with Jake under wraps. “Jake and I were supposed to get together Sunday, but he never responded when I texted him to confirm.”

  “Then he’s a fuckwad, and I take back everything I said about him being hot.”

  “While I appreciate that, I’m serious, Katie. Maybe I’m inadvertently sending out a ‘blow me off’ signal.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t think so. There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s them. Men are assholes. All of them.”

  “Not Wyatt,” I pointed out.

  “I’ll allow it, but he has his moments.”

  “I’m swearing off guys for a while.”

  She nodded. “That’s fair. But I meant what I said. There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re nearly perfect.”

  “Aww… thanks. Can I ask what the nearly is for?” I grinned. “Why aren’t I one-hundred-percent perfect?”

  Katie pointed at Princess Buttercup, who was stretching one back leg up in the air and had contorted herself so she could lick her lady business. “That, right there, is why you’re not perfect. You brought that devil cat into my life.”

  I laughed. “She loves you. And you love her. Admit it.”

  Katie stuck out her chin and flared her nostrils. “I tolerate her for your sake.”

  “Keep lying to yourself.”

  CHAPTER 9

  Jake

  I WOKE UP, twisted my neck, and immediately regretted it as pain shot through my shoulders. Sleeping on the floor sucked ass.

  Emily and Ashley were sleeping in my room, and Ben got the couch in the living room, which put me on the floor. It was only supposed to have been for one night, but that had morphed into two when the first rental house I found had fallen through. Luckily, my real estate agent had managed to convince one of her clients to rent me a different house that had been for sale. She might have used my sob story to convince them, but that was fine with me. Whatever it takes.

  Rubbermaid tubs containing all of my siblings’ belongings were stacked to the ceiling in the corner of the living room, making the small room feel claustrophobic. My roommate, Matt, had been understanding when I’d shown up Monday evening with my siblings in tow, and he continued to be good-natured about it, but the situation was getting to me. We’d been tripping over one another for the past few days. The kids were bored, and tempers were short.

  I had wanted to wait until we were settled in our new place before enrolling them in school, but after Ashley made Emily cry for the third time in two days, I realized I wasn’t doing anyone any favors by waiting, including me. I’d already missed most of my classes that week while trying to get everything sorted out. I’d emailed my professors, and they had all been generous about giving me extensions on assignments, but I would still need to find time to complete them at some point. It certainly wouldn’t be today, though. I would be signing lease papers and hauling all of our shit, while my siblings would be getting acclimated to Edgewood Elementary School, Bleaksburg Middle School, and Bleaksburg High School. It had taken all of the previous day to get them registered at the three different schools.

  I stood and stretched then shook Ben. “Bro, wake up.”

  He rolled over. “Five more minutes.”

  “No. Matt has class this morning, so he’s going to need some hot water too. You need to shower now.”

  “Make Ashley go first.”

  I blew out a breath. Ben was generally levelheaded, but all bets were off when it came to waking up early. He’d always been that way. But I did not have the patience for his shit this morning. I was exhausted and stiff as hell.

  I yanked the blanket off him. “Now.”

  He gave me a dirty look then stumbled toward the bathroom, nearly eating carpet when the blanket he’d been using got tangled between his legs.

  Next, it was time to wake the girls. Emily had showered the night before, and I had tried to get Ashley to do the same, but she’d acted as though I’d asked her to shave her head. Apparently, she always showered in the morning. Making her deviate from her routine would insure she had a horrible first day at her new school because her hair would be flat. I hadn’t even known what to say to that. It wasn’t a battle I had been willing to fight, though, so now we all had to get up thirty minutes early to accommodate her.

  I tried not to be angry and told myself it was important to disrupt their routines as little a
s possible. But that was bullshit, of course. How could their routines not be totally fucked? Mine was, and I wasn’t the one who’d had to move and start at a new school.

  Matt skated out of the apartment earlier than he needed to for his morning class, probably to save himself from the chaos. I really owed him. He’d been a walk-on on the team our freshman year, which was how we’d ended up as roommates. Even though he’d quit the team after the first year, we’d gotten along well enough that we had continued being roommates even after we moved off campus. I’d had no intentions of bailing on him our senior year, and I felt bad about it, but he’d told me not to worry. People were always looking for roommates, so he would find someone. Matt was seriously a good dude.

  An hour later, after a nutritious breakfast of Lucky Charms and Pop-Tarts, we were running out the door. After I made the three separate drop-offs, I headed to the realtor’s office to sign papers and pick up the keys for our new place. My apartment had come fully furnished, but this house came with nothing. That meant that unless I wanted to spend the night on the floor again—joined by my siblings this time—I needed to buy beds, which was easier said than done.

  It turned out most stores didn’t keep large items like mattresses and furniture in stock—customers had to order them to be delivered. I’d had no clue. There weren’t many stores to choose from in Bleaksburg, so I was stuck with getting whatever odds and ends the stores could scrounge up. I managed mattresses and a kitchen table and chairs, which would have to be good enough for the time being. Those few things took me several runs with my truck, so it was probably better the rest of it was being delivered later anyway. I’d hoped to have the house ready by lunchtime so I could have some time to catch up on my own shit, but everything was taking way longer than I’d expected.

  In the dining room, I ripped open the box containing the table and pulled out the pieces. It was a cheap piece of shit that would probably fall apart if someone hip-checked it, but it would do until I could get something better. Luckily, money wasn’t an issue. My parents hadn’t been wealthy, but since my dad had worked in insurance, they’d had one hell of a life insurance policy. I would much rather have them than the money, though.

  The dining set came with a small Allen wrench, which I used to put the table together. That was one of the reasons I’d chosen that set—no tools were required. My dad had left me all of his tools, but they were in storage along with the rest of my parents’ stuff. Living in an apartment, I hadn’t needed tools. Hopefully, I could continue to get by until I had time to go back and get them. I’d barely been able to fit all of my siblings’ necessities in my truck.

  I righted the table and set the chairs around it. There were only four. We were a family of four now. It had been the better part of a year, but I still wasn’t used to that.

  I wandered around the empty house and took in the stark white walls and beige carpet. It had an odd smell. Not bad necessarily. Just odd. It didn’t seem like home. I thought about buying some pictures to hang on the walls to make it homier, not that I knew what would help. I knew the basics of caring for my siblings—make sure they ate, slept, showered, and went to school. But beyond that, I was out of my depth. I didn’t know how to give them what they needed most—a home.

  ***

  Rachel

  “I’M GOING TO miss you so much, Rachel,” Mrs. Davidson said as I packed up my things.

  It was my last day with her. Next week, I would start observations with a fifth-grade teacher. A small part of me hoped I would fall in love with being in a classroom of slightly older kids. The logical part of me recognized how unlikely that was. I’d come to the conclusion that while I liked being around kids, I didn’t want to teach. I supposed realizing that was a step in the right direction, but it didn’t put me any closer to deciding on a new major.

  I smiled at Mrs. Davidson. “Thank you. It was a pleasure working with you.” That was a lie, but I would never tell the older lady the truth—I’d dreaded coming to her classroom. She was a great teacher, and her students loved her, but first grade wasn’t for me.

  With a sigh of relief, I left Mrs. Davidson’s class for the last time. As I walked down the hall toward the main entrance, I heard what sounded like crying coming from the girls’ restroom. I frowned. The buses had just left, and there shouldn’t have been any kids left in the building unless they were participating in one of the few after-school clubs, but those were only on Tuesdays.

  I walked into the restroom, and the crying stopped. Peeking under the stalls, I saw a scuffed pair of pink tennis shoes in the last one. The occupant sniffed.

  Feeling awkward as hell, I knocked lightly on the door. “Is everything okay?”

  “Yes.” The small voice was shaky. She was most definitely not okay.

  I waited a beat. “Are you sure?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  Well, shit. Now what?

  “Honey, students in the building after school have to be supervised by a teacher, but I didn’t think there were any activities going on today.” I paused, but she didn’t say anything. “Are you here with a teacher?”

  “Am I in trouble?” The fear in her voice made me feel horrible, and it reminded me of my own childhood. I hadn’t been a bad kid, just gregarious and outspoken. Getting in trouble with my teachers hadn’t bothered me. But dealing with my parents after the fact had cut me to the core. I’d known from an early age that I was a huge disappointment to them. It wasn’t until I was a teenager that I stopped trying to please them and instead settled on flying under the radar.

  I had to think before I answered because I didn’t want to lie to her. “I don’t think so. Why don’t you come out of there?”

  It took a few seconds for the door to swing open, like the little girl had to think it over first. Her face was streaked with tears, and her long blond hair was a tangled mess. She looked to be eight or nine.

  “What’s your name?” I asked.

  Sniffing, she pushed her hair out of her face. “Emily.”

  “Hi, Emily. I’m Miss Byrne.” I leaned closer and whispered, “But you can call me Rachel.”

  “Are you a teacher?” Stranger danger had kicked in.

  I shook my head and pointed to the badge pinned to my shirt. “I’m a student observer from VVU.”

  “My class had one of those.”

  “Oh yeah? Who’s your teacher?”

  “Mrs. Jenkins, but she left early. We had a substitute after lunch.”

  I motioned for her to come out of the stall. “So why are you here by yourself?”

  Her chin quivered. “It’s my first day, and I got confused on the bus ramp. I came back inside to ask which bus to take, but then they left. I didn’t want to get in trouble, so I hid in here before anyone saw me.”

  I gave her a sympathetic look. “It’s understandable that you’d get confused on your first day. I’m sorry no one was there to help you.” The poor girl probably got lost in the shuffle when the substitute was trying to handle the afternoon rush of getting the kids off at the end of the day. Most subs were pretty good, but not all. “Let’s go to the office and figure out how to get you home.”

  She nodded and reached to slip her hand in mine before jerking it back.

  “If you want to hold my hand, you can,” I offered.

  “It’s okay.” She gripped the straps of her backpack, so I didn’t push.

  We walked in silence to the office, which wasn’t far. The secretary first shot us a confused look then quickly recovered and smiled at Emily. “I remember you. How was your first day?”

  “I missed the bus,” the little girl blurted out.

  “Oh no. That’s too bad. I actually have your paperwork right here. I’ll call your guardian to come get you.”

  Beside me, Emily relaxed. “Okay.”

  The secretary pointed to a bench just outside the office. “You can wait there. When he gets here, he’ll need to come in the office so we can verify his ID.”

  Though I h
ad been eager to leave, I sat on the bench next to Emily. I didn’t want to leave the distressed little girl alone. Hopefully, her guardian would come soon.

  “You said you were in Mrs. Jenkins’s class,” I said. “Is that second grade?”

  She nodded. “But I’m on a fourth-grade reading level.”

  “That’s awesome. Do you like to read?”

  She shrugged. “It’s okay if I get to pick out my own books.”

  “What books do you like?”

  “I used to like the Judy Moody books, but that’s too baby for me now.”

  “Hmm… I don’t think I know those.” I wracked my brain, trying to come up with some appropriate titles from my elementary ed classes. The trouble was that most times, kids didn’t actually want to read the books adults thought they should read. “How about Dork Diaries? I haven’t read them, but I saw some fourth- and fifth-grade girls with them in the library.”

  “I haven’t read those.” She yawned, and I realized how exhausted she looked. Changing schools so late in the year had to be tough. I hoped the rest of her first day hadn’t been as traumatic as the bus-ramp debacle.

  “You have really pretty hair,” I told her. “Do you want me to brush it for you?” I’d loved having my hair brushed as a kid. Memories of my mother brushing my hair before bed were among my best. The practice always had a soothing effect on me. “I have a brush in my purse.”

  Her eyes lit up then quickly clouded over. “I don’t have my brush, and my aunt told me never to share brushes.”

  “That’s actually good advice. I’m sure you’ve heard of hair lice.” I made a face. “Yuck. Your aunt sounds smart.”

  “She’s a nurse.”

  “She definitely knows what she’s talking about, then.”

  “She didn’t want me.”

  I blinked. “Excuse me?” I must have heard her wrong.

  “That’s why I came to live with my brother. Because she didn’t want to take care of me anymore.”

  I wanted to pull this little girl to my chest and squeeze all the love into her that I could. I didn’t know the whole story, but I couldn’t imagine what kind of horrible woman would let a sweet little girl think she was unwanted.