Life is a Beautiful Thing (4-Book Box Set)

by Harmon Cooper

  Once in the room, Tyro fidgeted for a while on the bed. Relaxing wasn’t as easy as it sounded. He felt as if he should do something. Maybe he should be reading a journal article or planning out his schedule for next week. Maybe he should log into iNet and check the news. He’d read yesterday that China had installed yet another firewall to block outside news from entering the country. It took elite hackers all of five minutes to disable the firewall. This caused the Chinese Government to instigate a country-wide Internet shut-down to punish the hackers. The hackers were quickly apprehended by the government, and were set to be executed the following morning.

  “No iNet,” Tyro said aloud. Instead, he ordered a pollution mask and picked out a flavor he’d never tried before but that Meme had written down on a card for him.

  “LoathHunAyaTop,” he said, when the man at the desk asked him what flavor he wanted. The mask and a few packets arrived on a silver plate. He asked the room service attendant how to use the mask and the guy helped him set it up. Again, he paid in cash.

  Tyro-as-Meme watched the attendant suspiciously as he connected the mask to the distributor and dropped one of the packets in. As he left, the attendant said he looked familiar, which caused a spike in his heartbeat. The attendant reminded him that he had been here the previous night. Tyro feigned ignorance and the attendant let himself out.

  One hour until Yeshi arrived and Tyro was in bed, his legs sprawled out and the pollution mask strapped to his face. He inhaled deeply, as deeply as possible, coughing and trying to get a smooth inhale off the pollute.

  Minor details in the decorations around the hotel room were starting to become incoherent. The light from the setting sun outside his window made the room hazy. The pollute had a peculiar aftertaste, it made the bed feel softer and safer than it had felt before, as if he could sink so deep into the mattress that he would never be able to rise again.

  For what seemed like years, Tyro gazed up at the ceiling through the mask’s green eye lenses and watched small droplets of black light sprinkle onto his body. He felt euphoric, free, as if he were no longer tethered to reality, as if time didn’t matter and his choices no longer had ramifications.

  “Life is a beautiful thing,” he whispered. His mind traveled further and further into an emerald void.

  THIRTY-FIVE∞

  “You really are a beautiful girl, really.” Noah watched Nelly brush her hair.

  “You’re just saying that,” she said.

  “No, no. I’ve seen plenty of humans … you by far are the most gorgeous … ”

  “Mirror, mirror on the wall … ” she said, hoping he would get the reference.

  “What’s that mean?” He started to peel an orange in her immaculate kitchen. He worked quickly, arranging the orange slices in a semi-circle around a spread of watermelon, zero calorie pretzel sticks, Himalayan honey glazed asparagus, dried chunks of apple, green grapes and a rare Swiss cheese limited to fifty kilos worldwide. On another plate, he had arranged small rice wafers, thin wheat biscuits and organic oatmeal cookies. Nelly was a closet localvore, and aside from the asparagus and Swiss, everything on his spread had come from local sources.

  She logged into iNet and noticed she had a missed call from Meme. She remembered what her husband had said to her the previous night: Sauria is after Meme. He’ll be … removed … by the end of the week.

  The fact that her husband thought Meme could be a terrorist amused her. Anyone who wasn’t part of his little rat pack of private security businessdicks was deemed a threat to national security. It was funny how scared grown adults were of the dark. They were scared enough to invest their entire lives fighting an invisible enemy, scared enough to create weapons more violent than God could imagine to kill enemies only they could have themselves created. She was too naïve to know that some enemies truly did exist.

  Using a GoogleFace infoErazer she had downloaded six months ago, Nelly placed a call to Meme. She’d been meaning to call him all day, but her morning sickness had taken its toll. “Wow … ”

  “Oh hi, Nelly,” Meme-as-Tyro said. “Meet my new body.”

  “So you switched? Nice glasses, by the way.”

  “I did, with a co-worker of mine named Tyro. Listen, we need to talk. What the fuck happened last night? Why was I almost killed by MercSecure representatives? Is this really all because I punched that Sauria guy? Surely he can’t be that vindictive … ”

  Nelly opened her eyes to see Noah smiling. He took the seat across from her, crossing his legs and trying to mirror her concern. He wore a tight blue jacket and a thin black tie. His left eye was shining with a fresh application of eye liner. His pressed pants were tucked into a pair of ankle high stingray leather boots.

  “He is that vindictive. Your life is seriously in danger.”

  “What should I do?”

  “Let’s meet in an hour and I’ll get you to Mexico.”

  “Mexico?” Meme-as-Tyro asked.

  “I have connects there. From there, we can smuggle you somewhere else.”

  “Do you think this is really that serious?”

  She nodded. “Last night was just a sample of what they have in store for you. You need to get the hell out of Dodge.”

  “Why are you so interested in helping me?”

  “I have my reasons.” Nelly thought of her husband, his lying, the shadiness of his friends, his cheating and his blatant stupidity. Boy did she have her reasons. “I’ll keep my reasoning to myself.”

  “Fair enough. What kind of food?”

  “Mario’s. You know the place?”

  “Yes, it’s near my office. So, tell me more about Mexico … ”

  “I have border immunity,” she explained. “You know, we should probably just discuss this when we meet.”

  “What type of money should I bring?”

  “Do you have an overseas account?”

  He thought for a moment. “Actually I have a business account that I used in Brazil.”

  “Transfer all your money there. I’m serious. Do it now. Shit. They’re probably monitoring your bank account … ” she said. “Use this website I’m sending you to transfer the money. It’s called Hawalas Transfer. It’s an anonymous way to transfer money to the Middle East.”

  “The Middle East?”

  “These people are the best at making money disappear. The service will make it appear as if the balance has never left your account. It will stay like this for around two weeks, plenty of time to bail the fuck out of here. We can get you a different identity in Mexico. The body that you’re currently in looks too much like my dad and it’s disturbing.”

  He laughed. “Duly noted. Nelly, seriously, why are you doing all this?”

  “Look, my husband, or should I say, my soon to be ex-husband’s good friend is Sauria. I’m sick of these types of people. I want out and I have enough money to keep me afloat for some time. Just meet me and we can figure out your role in all this.”

  “Got it. See you there.”

  “Bye.”

  “What’s happening?” Noah asked. He waited as Nelly made sure the call hadn’t been traced or recorded.

  She sighed. “It’s complicated. Meme, the guy that my husband’s trying to catch, switched bodies with a co-worker of his named Tyro. He didn’t know people were after him. I mean, he knew he’d fucked up by hitting Sauria, but he didn’t know it was this serious.”

  “What about the guy that’s in his body now?”

  “Well, hopefully … ” Nelly shrugged, knowing all too well the odds of her husband’s friends finding Meme (or who they thought was Meme) before Sunday. Whoever this Tyro guy was, his life was nearing its end. She knew how easily people disappeared when they stepped on the wrong toes.

  “And … what about me?”

  “Noah, I can’t live without you! You’re coming with me wherever I go. Out of all the people in this world, you’re the last person I’d leave.”

  “You think I’m a person?” He sat down next to her. �
�Really? You really do? I’m moved.”

  “You’re my favorite person. There’s no one else like you in this whole world. You’re unique, you’re handsome, you’re strong and you’re smart.”

  “That is so nice,” Noah said. He wrapped his arms around her. “I’ll never leave your side, okay?”

  “Promise?” Nelly asked.

  “Promise.”

  THIRTY-SIX∞

  Rinchi arrived at seven and knocked on Tyro’s hotel room door. She wore Yeshi’s white trench coat with the collar flipped up.

  “Who is it?” a voice called from the other side.

  “Me … ”

  She heard some scrambling inside the room. “Yeshi?” he asked, opening the door. He stood in a dress shirt, unbuttoned all the way to his stomach.

  Rinchi smiled. “Hi, Meme.” Applied to her face were Yeshi’s butterfly eyelashes and one of her LCD tikas. She blinked rapidly, doing a brief scan of who she thought was Meme. His vitals indicated he’d already started using pollutes.

  “Chip-masker?”

  “I … ummm … I always use it these days.”

  “Oh, that’s right,” she said.

  “I have something for you.” He stumbled towards the bed and retrieved a box that lay on a nightstand next to it.

  “What is it, baby?”

  “Open it … ” Tyro said.

  “Already on them, huh?” She puckered her lips. He was more nervous than she’d imagined he would be.

  “A little.”

  Rinchi opened the box and took out the bonsai tree. She held it for a moment judging its weight. It was much heavier than it looked.

  What am I supposed to do with this? She could smash the tree and its little ceramic pot against his face and drive the heel of her stilettos into his eye, puncturing his brain. Or possibly, crack the pot against his skull then strangle him with his own belt. Maybe she could knock him out, drag him into the bathroom, fill the tub with water and drown him while ramming the shower curtain rod up his ass. Another option: after binding his arms and feet to the bed, she could use the small knife she had brought to slowly torture him.

  She checked his vitals again. Overpowering him would be a cinch. Humandroids were generally twice as strong as a regular human. Turn the violence governor off – something done to all Humandroid escorts – and you had a force to be reckoned with.

  Rinchi had fantasized about killing a human before, but never thought she would actually have the chance – especially a chance where she could get off scot free. She casually peeled off Yeshi’s trench coat and tossed it onto a chair. The look of awe in Tyro’s face was one she’d grown used to long ago. Under the trench coat, she wore a pair of white leggings tucked into knee-high stilettos. Lustrous latex suspenders climbed from her waist to her shoulders. The frosty suspenders, which crossed behind her neck, were positioned just right to cover her nipples. They were attached to her leggings by small clips.

  “I’ve been waiting for you,” she purred. She unzipped her boots and kicked them off unceremoniously.

  “H-have you?” he asked.

  “Go ahead baby, take some more,” she gestured towards the pollution mask.

  “Sure … ” He fumbled to attach the mask to his face.

  “How have you been since last night?” She placed her hand across his lap. “You’re so jumpy … ”

  “Fine! And you?”

  “It was a relaxing day. Look, I painted you this picture.” She opened her large white purse and started searching through it. She handed him the small painting she’d taken from Yeshi’s side of the room.

  “This is unusual,” he said.

  “Unusual?”

  “It’s very rare that a Humandroid paints a picture. A recent study by Dr. Beckstein revealed that the machine learning capabilities of a Humandroid has yet to explore the realm of art. He recruited three very different types of Humandroids: a soldier, an escort and a waiter to perform a series of studies involving … ”

  “Shhhhh… ” Rinchi placed her finger over his mouth. Something about his demeanor wasn’t right; something was very familiar about the way he talked about Humandroids. She looked deep into his eyes for a moment.

  She watched as he took another drag off the mask.

  “Take the mask off and come over here.” she said. “Or keep it on if you want. It’s your choice.”

  As he touched her, Rinchi monitored his vitals. His heart rate had picked up and he was exhibiting the signs of someone experiencing signs of duress. Was he always like this with Yeshi? His pheromonal output was bizarre as well. “Just relax, baby.” Rinchi ran her hand along his chest and to his boxer briefs. He had an erection so he was definitely turned on, yet the pattern of his breathing was uneven in a very familiar way.

  “You’re so beautiful … ”

  “Close your eyes and lay on your back,” she said softly.

  She grabbed two choker collars from her purse and hopped back onto the bed. She quickly snapped one of the collars onto her neck. “Let’s give this a try.” She began looping the other collar around his neck.

  “What are you doing?” he asked.

  She could feel his muscles tense. ‘”See, I have a collar too … Don’t worry baby, this will be fun.” She let go of the collar and bent forward to kiss him. He soon forgot about the collar and grabbed the back of her head, pulling her in closer.

  “So real … ” he kept saying. “It’s so real … ”

  She softly slid her hand from his shoulder to the collar and started to tighten it. She began gyrating her hips, hoping to distract him just enough that she could get a good grip on the collar’s excess leather strip.

  She found her grip and sat up. She grabbed the pillow with her right hand and stuffed it down onto his face. She reared back, yanking the collar with all her might and squeezing his body tightly with her thighs. He started to buck, and at one point, almost bucked her off completely.

  Rinchi held on by squeezing her thighs. She pulled the collar tighter, her face cracking into a teeth-baring smile. She was stronger than him, much stronger. Muffled screams emitted from the pillow. The headboard slapped against the wall.

  Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud.

  “Shhhhhhh … ” she said, holding on as his body flopped. Once his bucking stopped, she removed the pillow and scanned his vitals. Still alive.

  “You just don’t want to die today do you?” She squeezed her legs tighter and pushed the pillow back down. She let go of the collar and used her entire upper body to apply pressure to the pillow.

  After a few more jerks, she felt his lifeless body relax onto the bed.

  She removed the pillow and used the strength of both arms to pull the collar even tighter. She waited on top of him for a few minutes, watching as his eyes bulged out of their sockets. She dropped the collar after scanning his vitals a final time. Something brushed against her leg – he still had a slight erection.

  Rinchi felt absolutely nothing as she peered down at his lifeless body. Her eyes fell upon the bonsai tree sitting on the nightstand. She hopped off the bed, retrieved the tree, and shattered the ceramic pot against his skull, filling his nostrils and lips with dirt and pebbles.

  She was surprised at how easy it was to take life, at how unrepentant she felt. One moment something was alive and annoying, the next moment it was dead and quiet. Almost like a lightswitch. Almost like a Humandroid. Almost like her.

  Rinchi put the trench coat on and sat on the bed next to Tyro’s lifeless body. She called Antimeria over iNet to tell him that the job was finished. Meme was officially dead.

  THIRTY-SEVEN∞

  I’m sitting in a plush booth at an Italian restaurant called Mario’s. The restaurant, on the top floor of the HondaFord building, has been a tourist destination ever since a critical scene from Fast and Furious XXXV took place here. There are signed photos on the wall of all the celebutards and diplomats who have visited the place, posters from all thirty-five Fast and Furious movies and a working
twentieth century photo booth that is the very last one on the planet (in fact, the steamy romance scene in Fast and Furious XXXV took place in, around and on top of the photo booth).

  Mario’s is locally known for its zero calorie organic vitamin-pizza, which has since been marketed to green grocers across the States. Aside from all the international and local attention, the place is a quaint diner with outstanding dishes that has recently introduced curbside aeros service, after losing business to an Italian restaurant called Luigi’s on top of an adjacent skyscraper.

  As I wait for Nelly to arrive, I watch the curbside attendant bring recycled to-go boxes to a line of waiting aeros. It’s approaching eight thirty, which means that Nelly is late. To kill time, I’m playing a game on iNet called Treasure Hunter X. In the game, a small three dimensional figure explores vast dungeons and collects treasure. As I explore a dungeon called Killer’s Lair, the waiter sets a pollution mask on the table in front of me. I nod slightly, with my eyes still closed.

  I receive an incoming call from Yeshi with an attached message: WHERE ARE YOU? YOU ARE IN DANGER! I pause the game and take the call, not bothering to enable the video feed.

  “Meme, are you alive?”

  “Sure, what’s happened?” I ask, watching a brand new aeros Jag pull into the curbside lane.

  “Where are you right now? Your voice sounds different.”

  “It must be the connection. I’m at Mario’s.”

  “Are you with me?”

  “What? What do you mean?”

  “We’re supposed to be together right now. Are you sitting across from me? Rinchi … my twin she … don’t say anything if you are with me right now.”

  “With you? I’m alone, Yeshi.”

  “Where’s Rinchi?”

  “How should I know where she is?”

  “You were supposed to meet me… ”

  “About that… ” I say.

  I open my eyes and see Nelly sit down across from me. Nelly takes her cantaloupe sunglasses off, puts them in a case, tosses the case in her purse.