Knowledge Hurts

by D. S. Williams

  In a burst of supernatural speed, Lucas was at the door. I knew he'd done it deliberately, to see how Matt would react. Matt looked stunned and I giggled, amused by the wealth of emotions that flickered across his face. “Vampires can move quickly,” I confirmed.

  “So I see,” he responded weakly. “Anything else I should know about?”

  My shrug was deceptively casual. “Heightened senses - he knew it was Epi because his sense of smell, hearing and eyesight are far superior to ours. And incredible strength.”

  “Strength?” Misaki repeated happily. Judging by the delight in her eyes, she was fascinated by the whole concept and excited to come to the realization that the myths were true. “I've read about that.”

  I shook my head ruefully. “Speaking as a person relatively new to the supernatural word, I can tell you the majority of what you've read isn't true. But strength is.”

  “How strong is he?” Matt asked, scratching his eyebrow.

  “Strong enough to lift a car, throw a tree. His body is like granite. He can't be injured by conventional methods.”

  “I guess I've got a lot to learn,” Matt admitted, watching as Lucas stepped past him to sit down.

  “Epi was checking if everything was alright,” Lucas explained, dropping his hands onto my shoulders. “And he's pleased you've chosen to join us, Matt. He asked if you would attend our meeting tomorrow morning.”

  “Absolutely. I'd appreciate the opportunity to find a way I can help.” He looked at Kazuki sleeping peacefully in my arms and smiled tenderly. “It sure is good to see you with your little brother, Charlotte.”

  I smiled with genuine warmth. “He's really cute.”

  “And completely besotted with 'Wucas',” Misaki grinned and stood up. “Matt, we should go back to our cottage and leave Lucas and Charlotte in peace.”

  “Sure, yeah.” Matt drew himself up and Misaki leaned over to scoop Kazuki from my arms. “He looks very comfortable with his big sister,” she said softly.

  “He's adorable,” I admitted. “I hope I can spend more time with him.”

  “Of course you can,” Misaki responded. “He's your brother.” She straightened up and I pulled myself onto my feet, favoring my leg only a little now the Tremaine ointment was having its desired effect. “And besides, he's devoted to 'Wucas',” Misaki continued with a devilish look. “We can hardly keep him away from his favorite plaything.”

  Lucas and I shared a warm smile. “Well hopefully, he'll get to adore his big sister as much as he adores 'Wucas',” I suggested. Lucas rolled his eyes, but they were filled with amusement.

  Matt bridged the small distance between us. “Thanks - for giving me another chance.” He stood awkwardly and I reached for him, hugging him.

  “Thanks for wanting to have another chance,” I agreed.

  He held me close and I shut my eyes, strangely comforted by being held by this man, who'd been missing from my life for so long. When he released me, he extended a hand to Lucas. “And thank you for caring for her. I appreciate it.”

  Lucas accepted his handshake. “It's an honor, Matt. Charlotte gives me far more than I ever felt worthy of receiving. She's a remarkable woman.”

  Matt nodded thoughtfully, hugging me briefly once more before Misaki kissed my cheek. “We'll see you tomorrow?”

  “Absolutely,” I agreed.

  Lucas followed them to the door and they said their goodbyes before he closed the door behind them. In a swift movement he was in front of me, taking me in his arms. “That went well,” he murmured.

  “Better than I expected,” I admitted.

  “I'm glad you told him the truth.”

  “Well, I figure he'd already freaked out. Finding out we're living together and how old you are wasn't going to make too much difference.”

  Lucas smiled. “I suppose that's true.” He kissed my nose. “But I'd like to make an honest woman of you.”

  I frowned, scrutinizing his face carefully. “What?”

  Lucas gazed down at me, his expression solemn. “I come from an era where a man and a woman married before they made love. Perhaps it's old-fashioned, but it seems to me I have… stolen your virtue.”

  For a few seconds I gaped at him - then burst into laughter. When I recovered my composure it was to find Lucas looking somewhat perturbed. “I'm sorry…” I bit my lip, trying to find the right words. "I understand you come from a different era, but I'm a modern girl. You're a modern man. I'm not all that concerned about my… virtue.

  Lucas drew a deep breath. “So you're not concerned about living in sin?”

  I giggled, unable to suppress my amusement. “Um, no.” I studied him for a few seconds. “Why on earth would this be worrying you? You've slept with lots of women before now.”

  “No-one I've intended spending my existence with. I feel I should make our union legal between us and before God.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

  Lucas smiled. “You don't worry that you'll go to hell?”

  “Definitely not. Besides, I'm an angel, I think that gives me a free pass to heaven.” I narrowed my eyes suspiciously. “Why? Are you?”

  “I come from Irish stock, Charlotte. I was raised a Catholic. Yes, I have doubts about my passage to the afterlife.” Observing my startled expression, he explained further. “Charlotte, we're vampires. Our belief system suggests we have no souls. Without a soul, you can't be admitted to heaven.”

  “I don't believe that,” I scoffed lightly. The very idea seemed absurd. Lucas, Ben - all of them - the very idea they could be seen as soulless creatures was implausible. Vampires they may be, but their inherent goodness was beyond reproach in my eyes.

  Lucas looked uncertain, his dark blue eyes filled with some emotion I couldn't fathom. Not quite worry, but certainly some vacillation. I had to remind myself that he came from a different era, a different century. He was a thoroughly modern man in so many ways, but his belief in religion was likely to be completely different from my own modern thoughts on the subject. “Even so, perhaps I should be pushing my luck,” he commented quietly.

  Shaking my head, I held his gaze steadily. “I'm not sure what you're saying.”

  He inhaled deeply before he spoke, almost as though he were frightened. For a moment, I caught an emotion I'd never seen in Lucas before. He was… nervous. “I'm saying - I want you to marry me.”

  My breath caught in my throat for a few seconds, then released with a quiet whoosh. “Marry you,” I repeated slowly.

  “Yes.”

  A tiny smile played on my lips. “You're proposing?”

  He sighed heavily, arching one eyebrow. “Yes. That's what I'm doing.”

  I bit my lip, composing a careful answer. It had obviously been important to him, his concern about my… virtue paramount, to make him ask me this question. It was based on a belief system from more than a century ago and I didn't want to hurt him or dismiss his offer out of hand. “Lucas, I love you. I adore you. I can't imagine my life without you, but I'm only twenty one. I'm… well, I'm not sure I'm ready to get married.”

  “I see,” Lucas responded softly. The silver highlights in his eyes were rotating slowly, his expression calm. “So, you aren't saying no?”

  “I'm saying… I'm happy with the way things are.”

  “You will marry me though - at a later date?” he pressed quietly.

  I touched his cheek, caressing his cool skin as I smiled. “Yes. Later, when the time is right - I'll marry you.”

  He reached into the pocket of his jeans and when he drew his hand out, he was holding the ring I'd abandoned in Puckhaber Falls. “I've been carrying this with me since you left, hoping that one day you would wear it again.” He reached for my left hand. “Will you do me the honor of wearing it again?”

  “Like… an engagement ring?” I asked warily.

  He smiled softly. “I've got the impression you may be a little cagey about a marriage proposal. Shall we call it - a promise ring?” He slipped the de
licate gold band onto my finger and I stared at it, watching the light overhead catching the brilliant gold and making it gleam. “When you feel ready to accept my proposal, I will replace this with a ring of your choice.”

  I shook my head resolutely. “Lucas, I won't ever want another ring, I love this one. It's… well, it's special to me, because it's special to you.” I looked up into his eyes. “It's as though this ring carries a piece of your heart. When I took it off - before I left Puckhaber - I felt as if I'd lost your heart.” My eyes filled with tears, remembering the awful night when I'd left Lucas, thinking I would never see him again.

  Lucas drew me against him, holding me firmly to his chest. “You'll never lose my heart, Charlotte. I will love you, with every fiber of my being, for eternity.” He leaned down, catching my lips with his own and I clung to him, savoring the love he embraced me with.

  Chapter 40: Into the Valley of the Shadow…

  Acenith and I were standing atop the huge battlements two days later, when the first of the new groups arrived. Portalled to the outskirts of Zaen, they were walking in from the border, protected by a group of shape shifters and werewolves.

  “They look scared,” I remarked quietly. The group were straggling along, carrying their worldly possessions in rucksacks and duffel bags. Some of the men carried babies and toddlers, other children were holding the women's hands, clinging to what or who they knew.

  “It's hardly surprising. Being isolated here, we don't know how many have been attacked, other than what you learn from the nightmares. Perhaps these groups had already been attacked,” Acenith suggested. Her long hair was braided, hanging across her breast as she leaned on the wall watching the new arrivals.

  “Better get down there.” We walked down the steps, arriving at the gates just as the first of our new residents arrived.

  Nat Finton was already there, dressed in blue jeans and a checked shirt he greeted us with a warm smile. “Hey Charlotte, Acenith.”

  “Do we know where they're from?”

  “Bray and Tom brought them in from the States. They're a group of werewolves from Minnesota, attacked three weeks ago. They gladly agreed to join us, their houses were destroyed, they had nowhere to go.” Nat watched the group approach, hands perched on his hips.

  I'd learned from Nick that his pack could speak telepathically with one another when they were in their other form and as other groups joined us, we'd discovered they had the same ability. The fact that Nat already knew information about the newcomers wasn't surprising as his men were on the retrieval team.

  Ripley came up beside me, his expression sober. “I'll read them as they come through, ensure we haven't got anyone with issues,” he suggested quietly.

  “You're ability is still working?”

  He nodded, his gazed fixed on the incoming group. “It's working fine. And some of us are beginning to regain the telepathy between us.”

  “We can be thankful for some small mercies, then,” I suggested.

  Acenith drew the Hjördis she'd been issued from her pocket. “I'm a little nervous about this.” She and Rowena had volunteered to mark the new arrivals with the wing sigil and my own presence was two-fold - to greet the new arrivals and physically touch each person. It would build up the group of spirits that Epi assured me were my best weapon. It would also allow us to double-check that we weren't allowing anyone into Zaen who had ulterior motives. Despite my belief that anyone willing to have the mark of Nememiah could be trusted, Epi, Lucas and Ben insisted we needed to keep up our guard.

  “There's no choice, Acenith. It must be done,” Ripley reminded her gently.

  Rowena joined us and we spent an hour or so greeting and marking the latest allies. As I'd suspected they were frightened, having been attacked by the Consiliului, they'd been in hiding the past three weeks, struggling to stay alive. All were willing to be marked if it gave them an opportunity for safety and security. Although only a small group, perhaps sixty people - by the time I'd made contact with the spirits released from their touch, I had a headache coming on. Once inside the gates, a second group of volunteers were assisting the newcomers to settle in to their allocated accommodations.

  To a certain extent, we were developing a cohesive unit. Each inhabitant of Zaen had their responsibilities, overseen by their own leaders. Jerome was in charge of medical facilities, but we'd been incredibly fortunate in having another doctor join us, which took some of the pressure from Jerome's shoulders. Nonny was presiding over the Mess and next week we planned to commence school lessons for the children. A group of women had volunteered to handle the washing for the city and another small group of women, who had younger children, were providing childcare in one of the large houses in the central courtyard, allowing parents to work in their designated roles.

  Archangelo remained my biggest concern and as I stood greeting new arrivals, I mulled over the perpetual fear I carried - Nememiah's warning about Archangelo. He'd almost killed me once and I doubted I could defeat him. Despite my abilities, he was so much stronger and I had no idea how to kill him. Nememiah's words haunted me - his warning about only one of us surviving was a heavy burden to bear. It was something I tried not to think about, but the thought constantly niggled at the back of my mind. There must be a way of killing him, but if he could regenerate, what could it be? The spirits were non-committal with regards to defeating him, much to my continual irritation.

  I was mulling this question when a cacophony of sounds filled my head without warning and I clamped my hands to my temples.

  “Charlotte?” Acenith questioned, abandoning the man she'd been marking when she saw what I assumed could only be abject panic in my expression.

  “What's wrong?” Ripley demanded. It was clear from his face that he'd guessed.

  I looked around, aghast at the sight of forty or more people still waiting to be marked. “Demons. They're sending demons!” I stared up at Ripley, panic bubbling in my chest. “Go and sound the alarm. Get anyone inside who can go.” I glanced around frantically, expecting to see the demons coalescing as I spoke. “Ripley, get Epi. We need some way to shield these people until they can go in.”

  Ripley nodded tersely and ran towards the gate in a burst of superhuman speed. The group waiting to gain entrance to Zaen swarmed forward in terror and I held up my hands. “Stop! Stop!”

  “We have to get inside - you said demons are coming!” one man shouted.

  “You can't go in without the mark,” I stated. “We will keep you safe!”

  The warning siren sounded over Zaen, further alarming the already panicked group outside. Nat held up his hands. “We'll get you in safely! Remain calm, please!” he roared, his voice filled with authority.

  I shut my eyes briefly, forming a barrier of spirits around the newcomers and from the corner of my eye, I caught the first eruption from the ground. People started to scream, and Nat and one of his men forcefully held them back from the gates.

  “Charlotte, what can we do?” Matt appeared, along with Ben and Epi.

  “Matt, get as many of these children through the gates as you can. They don't need the mark. Check for any humans, they can go through now and be marked later.”

  Matt looked at me blankly and Ben spoke, simplifying my garbled explanation. “Matt, shape shifters, werewolves and anyone with mixed blood can't enter. Anyone purely human and those under sixteen can.”

  “Right.” Matt turned to speak to the group, his voice commanding. Despite panic overwhelming me, it was encouraging to see my father use his military experience to control the crowd. He was good at it.

  “How many, Charlotte?” Epi questioned.

  “More than we can handle,” I responded grimly. “Probably one hundred demons. Or more. And younglings.”

  Epi swallowed nervously, then straightened his shoulders doggedly. “Charlotte, you can do this. Concentrate on the demons, child. I will do what I can to help from the turrets.”

  “Not yet,” I responded. “I need y
ou to provide these people with some sort of shield.” There was no doubt that he could do it. Epi had proven more than once that he had abilities beyond my imagination.

  “As you wish, child.”

  Lucas appeared in the gateway, wearing a weapons belt and carrying mine. I took it gratefully, wrapping it around my waist and clutching the Hjördis in the palm of my hand.

  “What's our plan?” Holden asked with a grin when he arrived with William and Conal.

  Misaki had appeared and along with Clinton Davis she was escorting the children through the gates, her demeanor calm despite the panic surrounding her. “I'm going out to deal with the demons. You guys need to get these people marked.”

  “Charlotte, that's a crazy idea,” Conal argued immediately. “The vamps can fight the demons.”

  “Not like I can,” I responded. “And these people need the mark before we can get them in.” I turned to Lucas and Ben. “They're helpless without the mark. I've got spirits in a protective barrier around them until Epi can take over. You need to finish marking them. Once that's done and they're safely inside, I might need a hand.”

  “Might?” Conal smirked, but the twinkle in his black eyes confirmed his respect for my courage. Or insanity.

  “I'm not letting you out there without me,” Lucas stated.

  I watched as werewolves and shape shifters hurried out through the gates, already transformed and prepared to fight. “I'm not on my own, Lucas. This is important, please. I can't let these people die,” I begged quietly.

  “I'll be with her, leech.” Conal spoke up. “I'll make sure she's safe.”

  For long seconds, Lucas studied Conal, his eyes filled with disquiet. “You'll stay with her? No matter what happens?”

  “Absolutely. I'll protect her with my life,” Conal responded somberly. “You know that,” he added with a growl.

  “I know.” Lucas glanced down at me and nodded. “I'll be there as soon as I can.” He pressed his cool lips against my forehead and turned away.

  I rapidly applied sigils to my arms, horribly aware that the werewolves and shape shifters were fighting out there without them. There just wasn't time to get everyone marked and I cursed again, the lack of people able to use the weapons and Hjördis.