Shark Bait (The Grab Your Pole Series)

by Cooksey, Jenn

  On a painfully tight sigh, I shook my head and firmly said, “No Jilly. Even though I feel like there’s a huge gash in my chest from where he ripped my heart out, I can’t accept your offer, but thank you.”

  “What about the waste of lip-gloss?” She asked hopefully.

  “Dispose of her as you will,” I replied.

  Please understand something, I know Jillian isn’t about to physically hurt Teresa or anyone else. She might take some of her cues from the movie Heathers and Teresa might wish she’d never been born, but Jill’s not psychotic on any level.

  “Alright, now we’re talkin’!” She enthused as her eyes lit with excitement before she looked at me with concern again, her exhilaration fading to a simmer. “And how are you gonna handle ah…things?”

  “Honestly, I don’t have a freaking clue. I’m really hurt but the more I think about what just happened, the more mad I get and then I start thinking about all the really great stuff that’s happened between us which just reminds me why this hurts so much…it’s like a never ending cycle and it’s making me nauseous. I know there’s no possible way for me to face him for awhile though, so I think I’m gonna act sick to get outta school…” I started sniffling again as Jillian stood up and gave me an uncomfortably intent look that I couldn’t decipher.

  “Uh-huh… Okay, well I’m gonna get packed and get outta here…where’s the party?” She asked while still giving me the incomprehensible look.

  Truthfully, I have no idea what’s going through her head right now, but it’s giving me the creeps. It’s almost like she’s peering into my soul and doesn’t like what she sees.

  “Um, do you want me to come with you?” Kate offered. So maybe Kate didn’t quite grasp what kind of person my sister is. True, a twelve-year-old girl sneaking out of the house late at night by herself isn’t the safest thing, and maybe Kate hasn’t noticed Jill’s shirt or she just doesn’t know what the second amendment of the Constitution is, but truth be told, I’d be more fearful for anyone who might come across my sister than the other way around.

  “Oh, that’s nice of you to offer, but I prefer to work alone,” Jillian replied with a wink and then left us to wallow in self-pity.

  Deciding that we didn’t want to talk about the events of tonight any longer, our pity-party commenced. We raided the freezer of all the ice cream it held, grabbed the new package of Double Stuff Oreos and watched a couple of chick flicks. We fell asleep in the middle of the second one and never heard Jillian return home. I didn’t think I’d be able to sleep soundly with everything playing through my head like a broken record, but I must’ve because when Kate and I woke up Sunday morning, there was post-it note stuck to my forehead that read:

  For Your Listening Pleasure,

  Please Push Play on Your Stereo.

  Knowing this was Jillian’s way of trying to communicate something to me, I climbed out of bed, walked over to my stereo and pushed the play button as per requested and immediately heard her voice; it was followed by a slew of songs…

  Jillian: “Camie, I’m not even gonna pretend I know what you’re feeling right now because…well, I’m twelve and I still think boys are stupid. And I know you didn’t ask for my opinion or advice either, but before you go running to Mom claiming to have a heartbreak induced stomach flu, please hear me out… You’re stronger than that and you have options. The following selections are meant to be inspirational and motivational, so pay attention, and, enjoy.”

  As Kate and I listened to Jillian’s encouragement and suggestions made by way of music and lyrics, I was thinking how truly amazing my sister is. I also believe my parents have done a damned good job of indoctrinating her in music appreciation as well. The music she chose made it clear that some of the options she’d mentioned are things like; making him miss me, getting even, making him jealous, confronting him, being strong and persevering, and showing him what he has in me. I also thought you might like to know how she communicated that, so here are just some of the tracks she included:

  “Man, I Feel Like a Woman” – Shania Twain

  “Jealous Again” – The Black Crowes

  “All I Have” – Jennifer Lopez feat. LL Cool J

  “Maybe He’ll Notice Her Now” – Mindy McCready

  “Don’t Tread On Me” - Metallica (This also happens to be Jill’s self-proclaimed theme song and her ringtone on my phone.)

  “Look At Me I’m Sandra Dee (reprise)” – Olivia Newton John (Grease Soundtrack)

  “The Climb” – Myley Cyrus

  “Bring On the Rain” – Jo Dee Messina feat. Tim McGraw

  When I thought we’d heard the last song, Jillian’s voice came back and was, ultimately, what really finally got to me:

  Jillian: “I saw and heard some things tonight that gave me some insight into what happened and I don’t think you’re operating with all the facts, but regardless, no matter what you choose to do, I’ll back you all the way. But here’s the thing, Camie, you have to do something because this is one thing you cannot hide from. So come on…I dare you.”

  She then drove her point home with the force of a three hundred pound linebacker with one last song: “I Dare You to Move” – Switchfoot.

  Overwhelmed, moved, and crying, Kate and I looked at each other.

  “Wow. She’s right you know, Camie, you have to deal with this because it’s not gonna go away. Tristan really likes you but this isn’t surprising behavior for him…I mean this kind of thing happening was always the main drawback to the mission, you know? And I guess we’ve reached the crux of the situation…you need to decide how much you want him and how much you’re willing to go through to have him.”

  “Ugh, I can’t believe my little sister just totally called me out like that…and yeah, I know she’s right (she’s always right, damn it). I just don’t know what to do. I like him so much Kate, but I don’t know if I wanna go through another night like last night. I mean, I’m not gonna do what Melissa did and push myself on him...I know I need to be myself, but I don’t know how to go about doing that right now. What do you think Jill meant about not having all the facts?” I asked and cuddled my pillow.

  And just so you know, I’m leaning towards just putting what happened behind me and doing the “keep on keepin’ on” thing, but man, that’s gonna be rough. However, it might be the least of the evils at this point; my stomach already clenches horribly at the thought of never again experiencing the euphoria of what happens when he touches me or kisses me...

  “I have no idea, but your sister scares me,” Kate admitted with a shaky laugh.

  Hoping for some clarification on that, we got up and knocked on Jillian’s door. We didn’t get an answer. When I tried to open it, I found it to be locked which suggests to me that my sister has headphones on and is a very busy beaver. I have a feeling that Teresa is screwed...

  Oh, later that afternoon while Kate and I were shopping, which is always good for a pick me up, I got a text from Tristan:

  Tristan: where were u last nite? :-*

  Rather than being elated like usual, my first thought was, Aw shit.

  Now I really have to make up my mind…

  17.

  The Difference Between Manslaughter And First Degree Murder

  Monday morning I was still vacillating on what I wanted but I’d replied to Tristan last night after quite a few hours of thinking. I went with a partial truth by telling him that Kate was mad at Jeff and she’d come over to my house for a sleepover. I also went ahead and text kissed him back even though his felt like a lie. I guess I’m hoping I can get over what he did and stick to the original plan. After all, Kate was right. I was warned in the beginning that this was likely to happen; I just didn’t realize how hard it’d be when it did. Or, maybe I was in denial about it even happening at all.

  For the very first time, Kate and I actually made it to school with plenty of time before our first class. When we arrived she and I were astonished by the flurry of excited talk thrumming
throughout the student body. Everywhere on campus kids were huddled together and when we stopped by our lockers, we found out why. Stuffed inside each and every locker was a full page flyer with four insanely clear and detailed pictures of Teresa puking her guts out in front of the house where I left my battered heart Saturday night with a caption that read:

  PUBLIC HEALTH ANNOUNCEMENT

  How to recognize the early warning signs of liver cirrhosis brought on by teen alcoholism.

  We’d like to thank SOPHOMORE TERESA AUSTEN for providing us with this most-excellent visual aid, and coincidentally in doing so, she has also helped us to illustrate that pizza mixed with vast quantities of liquor is not only totally gross when it comes back up, but it’s also inevitable that it will. So, make sure you give her a big round of applause when you see her this week and don’t forget to check out Teresa’s live show at the following YouTube address.

  Damn. I shudder to think what she could’ve done to Tristan but regardless of the possibilities, I’m sure it would’ve been a far cry worse than a Sharpie mustache and being thrown in a pool because she was pretty ticked at him when she left Saturday night. I wonder if I should at some point mention to Tristan that he owes me huge for keeping him out of Jillian’s line of fire.

  I spent the entire day with a brittle smile on my face; feeling like it could crack at any moment. I also semi-seriously considered kicking Teresa out of whatever dank hole she’d found to spend the break in so I could hide for the duration of my English class. Having finally finished the book, Mrs. Henderson held a debate on what we think the underlying meanings in Pride & Prejudice are. However, Kate didn’t allow the fact that she still isn’t talking to him stop Jeff and she from using the topic to wage a war against each other, letting me see first hand that Jeff really can get worked up just as much as anybody. Additionally, I witnessed the fact that he knows how to verbally fight back fairly well too. Unfortunately, it also made the rest of us in class tense and uncomfortable. That is, everyone aside from Mrs. Henderson. She was totally pleased with them for clearly grasping the concepts and backing up their arguments with fervor, even if it was hostile. And of course, Tristan, he just thought the whole thing was funny. Seriously, he was acting like nothing had happened at all, like everything was right and just in the world, and that it hadn’t stopped turning the second his lips met some other girl’s, and by the time lunch rolled around, I felt too sick to eat.

  The only positives to my day are that Teresa has apparently moved into the aforementioned dank hole for the foreseeable future, and that Kate wanted to hightail it out of school the second the bell rang dismissing us from our last class. We didn’t even change back into our regular clothes. Also, when Tristan sent me a text shortly after school, I knew exactly how to answer and could be completely honest, however I did wait to respond until right before I went to bed around 10:00.

  Tristan: want 2 go out fri? :-*

  Me: cant. plans w/kate. :-*

  Kate and I decided to forego any festivities Friday night after the game and go to the movies by ourselves instead; it would give both of us some time to think. She told me she’ll eventually forgive Jeff but she wants him to really work for it and prove to her that he can be a grownup.

  Tuesday morning Kate pulled up not quite as early as yesterday and when I got in the car she had some unexpected news for me—along with puffy eyes. It looked as though she’d been doing a lot of crying. I wanted to ask but she waved me off and then dove right into her news.

  “I think I know what your sister might’ve meant by not having all the facts. Jeff called me last night again and I didn’t answer again, but instead of leaving me another voicemail, he hung up…except, he didn’t. I don’t know what you’re gonna do with this information, Camie, but you should hear what was recorded without them knowing about it.”

  She dialed her voicemail and handed me the phone so I could hear the conversation; one that progressively became a heated argument between Tristan and “Dear Jeff.” You’ll see why I’m back to calling him that in a minute. After listening to it, I figured Jillian must’ve heard a little something of what they were discussing while she was staking out the party, but she either didn’t know what to say about it or thought it didn’t make too much of a difference. I’m gonna go with the second one though, only because Jill typically gives her opinion if she thinks it’s pertinent. Anyway, here’s what the voicemail said:

  Jeff: “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”

  Tristan: “Voicemail again?”

  Jeff: “Yep. She’s gonna make me grovel on my fuckin’ hands and knees this time, I just know it.”

  Tristan: “How?”

  Jeff: “I watched her change her ringtone for me at lunch today to ‘Head Like A Hole’—Ouch, you little fucker!”

  Tristan: “Ooh, that’s harsh.”

  Jeff: “Yeah dude, tell me about it. Which one is this again?”

  Tristan: “Uh, Ferb… You know she’ll get over it eventually.” (I hear part of the song “Gotta Be Somebody” by Nickelback start playing) “God, finally…”

  Jeff: “At least Camie’s still talking to you.”

  Tristan: “Yeah, barely. I asked her out like five hours ago thou—aw goddamn it! You and your girlfriend are seriously getting on my fuckin’ nerves! Your fighting is spilling over into my life now, so could you please hurry up and bow down…before I start going through withdrawals?”

  Jeff: Yeah, I’ll get right on that, thanks for the support, dickhead. Quit climbing my leg, you little shit! You told her what happened, didn’t you? Aaahh! That hurts!”

  Tristan: “Hell no! Why in God’s name would I do that? Here, just give her to me…”

  Jeff: “Because you really care about her and if she doesn’t already know, chances are she’s gonna find out anyway. It’ll be better if she hears it from you first, trust me.”

  Tristan: “I really doubt she’ll find out...everyone’s talkin’ about Teresa puk—”

  Jeff: “Dude! You’re makin’ a mista—”

  Tristan: “Am I?! Tell me what Kate would say if you told her you were the one so baked out of your mind that you started makin’ out with some chick at a party thinkin’ it was her!”

  Jeff: “Oh that’s easy…Katy would totally string me up by my balls and eviscerate me on the goddamned stage in front of the entire school during a fuckin’ pep rally if I cheated on her like that.”

  Tristan: “So you see my point.”

  Jeff: “No dude, you’re missing mine…I’d still tell her.”

  Tristan: “Why go through that when there’s a good chance she’d never even fuckin’ know?!”

  Jeff: “Because I respect her! Give Camie some credit...if you tell her the truth I bet she’ll surprise you. Besides, do you really wanna risk hurting her even worse or completely losing her trust if she finds out from someone else? Because I’m tellin’ ya, that’s exactly what’ll happen. And I swear to God, dude, if you don’t take this seriously it’ll be like the fuckin’ Titanic going down on—”

  Tristan: “Don’t I wish…is she the boat or am I? I’d be happy either wa—” (Oh, for the love of God, please tell me he did not just go there…he’s making oral sex jokes now?)

  Jeff: “You’re fuckin’ unbelievable! Dude, you can kiss all hope of anything like that ever happening if you don’t come clean…you’ll be lucky if she takes you back let alo—”

  Tristan: “You just want me to rat myself out so I end up groveling next to you…that’s fucked up, man.”

  Jeff: “Listen to me, you dick! You’re gonna end up on your hands and knees anyway and I’m tellin’ ya, you’re makin’ a huge fuckin’ mistake here!”

  Tristan: “Oh and you’re the expert?!”

  Jeff: “In this? Yeah, I am! Dude, you know your way around chicks better than anyone I know and I couldn’t be more proud, bu—”

  Tristan: “Thanks man.”

  Jeff: “Let me fuckin’ finish, would ya?! You don’t know jack shit about girlfrie—�
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  Tristan: “Camie’s not my goddamned girlfriend!”

  Jeff: “Oh yeah?! Nice fuckin’ ringtone!”

  Tristan: “It’s just a fuckin’ song!”

  Jeff: “The hell it is! You’re only foolin’ yourself with this bullshit, because I swear dude, you’re theme song should be that Enrique Iglesias song ‘Addicted’! Take a good look at this picture and tell me I’m wrong! And did you even bother to look up what this scripture says? I mean Christ! Even her little sister can see the writing on the wa—” (Okay, now I’m lost…a picture, Jillian, and a scripture? Like from the actual Bible? Wow, what the hell happened the other night?)

  Tristan: “Her sister is fuckin’ criminally insane!”

  Jeff: “I don’t give a fuck! She’s not blind! When are you gonna just sack up and admi—”

  The voicemail cut off and I never got to hear what Jeff was saying Tristan needed to admit, but the rest of it simply floored me. Seriously, I’m speechless. Oh and what did you think of “Dear Jeff’s” side of the argument? I know, huh? I guess he deserves more credit than what’s been previously given to him. Because of course, he’s absolutely right. I’ve been battling with how to feel about this for days and now not only am I hurt, I’m so pissed I can’t see straight. Tristan doesn’t even want to give me the chance to hear what really happened, like he doesn’t trust me to handle the truth or something. He’s completely okay with keeping me in the dark about something he obviously feels guilty for doing, and he doesn’t seem to give a shit about the consequences of not being forthright with me.