Julian the Mighty

by Joachim Masannek

  Not only had I stolen my friends’ money; not only had I messed up Larry’s birthday surprise; now I had deserted my team just before the first game in the Devil’s Pit, the stadium of the Wild Soccer Bunch a.u., which, in case you forgot, means “Always United.” I had been proud of this once, too; so proud, in fact, that I went to the Graffiti Towers to tell my father. And look what it got me. I had to straighten this out. Just me.

  My bad conscience pushed me forward. I rode even faster than I did on the way to practice. I raced along streets, jumped up and down curbs and sidewalks, and like a Native American horseman, I hung to the side so I could fit under the gate to the Grim Woods.

  I steered my bike into the brush and disappeared from the eyes of the world. I jumped over roots and stones, cowered under twigs, and finally reached the old house ruins. I stepped on the brakes, reared my bike like a horse, did a wheelie, and looked at the ruins. The broken archway looked like a devil’s claw. The view sent shivers down my spine.

  I may have been a traitor to my team, but I was still a human being, with pride, heart, and determination.

  “Hey, Mickey!” I shouted. “I know you’re out there! I can smell you, you hear? In fact, I can smell all of you!”

  It was eerily quiet for a moment, but then they came out. One by one, they crawled out of the shadows around me: Mow-down, Humungous, Juggernaut, Grim Reaper, Octopus, and Kong. They wore twigs and tall weeds on their backs as camouflage. And finally their leader appeared as well. A shower of stones dropped from the archway, which moaned underneath his weight. Mickey the bulldozer showed himself, dark and black against the sky. With that ominous view, my front wheel hit the dust in front of him.

  “Where’s the money?” he asked and the question was like a slap in my face.

  Zoe could feel it too. What I didn’t know then was that she was hiding in the bushes, watching; I found that out later. She watched me pull out my cap with the money inside. She watched the whole thing.

  “Here!” I held it out to him, hatred in my voice. “Here is your money. But I’m warning you, Fatso. If Josh has even a scratch on him, I will turn you into fertilizer!”

  Mickey the bulldozer just stared at me. His beady eyes burned and almost forced me to my knees. But I fought the impulse. He laughed; he doubled over he laughed so hard. And that’s when his gang jumped me, pinned me to the ground, and took the money from me.

  All I could think was, “Thank God, it’s finally over.”

  But I was as wrong as showing up in the wrong town for a soccer game.

  Octopus and Kong pulled me to my feet and held me tight.

  “Let go of me!” I shouted, as brave as a sardine staring down a whale.

  “You’re coming with us,” Mickey decided as he heaved his body off the archway. “You didn’t want to go home anyway, did you?”

  He slid down the archway, loosening so many stones that I was sure it would come crashing down. It didn’t.

  “You really think anyone is going to miss you after what you’ve done today?”

  Mickey the bulldozer leaned in on me and grinned. His beady eyes hit my heart and stopped it for at least ten seconds.

  “This is it,” I thought. The coin had hit the ground and the side up was the side of the Unbeatables.

  I couldn’t and didn’t want to believe it. The all-in-one defender was defenseless. And when Mickey gave the order to move on, I marched along with them like a good little soldier. I marched with him into their world, which from now on would be my world: the other side of the Grim Woods. My old world, the world of the Wild Soccer Bunch, had ceased to exist.

  As they took me away, I looked back and caught a glimpse of Zoe, standing there among the tall weeds. She looked helpless and bit her lips in anger; her dark eyes glowed like fire. But then she saw the coin at her feet. It was my lucky coin, and she recognized it immediately. We tossed it in the air before every game to decide who got first kick and who played which side. Matching Mickey’s contempt when tossing it away, Zoe picked it up gingerly and gently brushed it off with her shirt. That was the last I saw of her.

  At the End of the World

  Mickey the bulldozer, his Unbeatables, and I left the Grim Woods. We marched through the tall weeds across the Prairie and reached a point I didn’t even know existed. Although the Graffiti Towers were to our far left already, we still moved further and further away. We walked across a different section of the desolate Prairie like a horde of nomads until we were all alone. Even the Grim Woods, the last familiar reference point connecting me to my old life, disappeared behind the horizon. The sun would soon follow.

  Night was about to fall and I was walking into no man’s land. I felt as if I was swimming in 10,000 feet of water, surrounded by sharks. I couldn’t think of a worse place to be on Earth. Then we marched up a hill, and I soon learned that I was wrong.

  Mickey and his gang seemed to be quite happy. They were obviously proud of whatever they were going to show me. Excuse me, but I couldn’t share their excitement. I was totally appalled.

  I looked down the hill at a rundown trailer park made up of old RVs and corrugated huts and rickety wooden shacks. Neon lights swung in the wind, illuminating stolen cars that were being dismantled with hissing welding torches and power tools. Dark and sinister men and women scurried about, whispering and snickering. I had heard about this place before but I never really believed it existed until that very moment that I looked down on it. It was called “Outlaw’s Nest.” Make no mistake about it: this was not a place for the likes of you – or me.

  Then I saw him. He was sitting in one of the huts, counting money, in the light of a bare bulb. He was as big as Jabba the Hut. In an instant I knew who he was: the boss. Mickey’s cousin. He was so large and blubbery, he made Mickey look like a young Abe Lincoln.

  The Unbeatables smiled at each other as if what lay below us was the realization of all their dreams. One day they all wanted to be just like that disgusting criminal down there, sitting under a bare bulb, drooling over a pile of cash. They took a deep breath, spit on the ground, and tried to summon up their courage before descending the hill.

  Mickey grabbed my arm. “Now that you’ve seen it,” he announced pompously, “you’re gonna keep your mouth shut. There’s no turning back now. Guard this secret with your life – and I do mean life. Got that?”

  Then he squeezed me so hard I thought I was going to die.

  “Got it?” he hissed again. I nodded, and he let go immediately.

  “See? What did I tell you? I’ve always liked this dwarf. He’s one of us now! Go on, give him a nice welcome!” he laughed and put his hubcap hands on my shoulder.

  The other Unbeatables followed his signal. One after the other passed by me and smiled before they went down the hill.

  I stayed back. Just me and the Grim Reaper. He suspiciously circled around me, looking at his prize like he’d just turned me over to the Dark Side.

  “Mickey might trust you, but I don’t. This is the only warning you’re gonna get,” he murmured. “I got my eye on you.”

  “Oh really?” There I went again. I never knew when to keep my mouth shut. My mom always said it and there I was, about to pop off again. “Which eye would that be?”

  The Grim Reaper didn’t expect that. They never do. I could see in his eyes that some brain cells were firing off, trying to make heads or tails of what I was saying, but they just didn’t connect. They couldn’t connect. There just weren’t enough of them. “You heard me, Defenderless,” he hissed. This guy really had no sense of humor. “I will hurt and torture you if you double-cross us. Is that clear?”

  I nodded like a good little soldier. Then I ran down the hill. Compared to the Grim Reaper’s company even the Outlaw’s Nest seemed like a monastery. The morons who were already there were greeted as if they were a bunch of cuddly toy animals. Kiss here and hug there. Even I was greeted that way. Yuck! But for the first time I felt absolutely safe, too. I was definitely at the end of the w
orld. I was in hell and the devil himself had just kissed and hugged me. I couldn’t think of anything worse that could happen to me. Right?

  “Hey, big guy!” Mickey greeted his cousin. “I have money for you. Here you go!”

  He poured the money on the table.

  “It’s $221. And for that I want the best; the best of the best. It’s party time!”

  Mickey the bulldozer and his cousin grinned at each other.

  “That’s a big ten-four deal, bro,” the fat king of thieves said. “Let’s use $71 for the party. I’ll keep the rest. Like I’m your bank. You have to start thinking about the future, bro. The wind is getting colder, and winter is just around the corner.”

  “Okay by me. If you think that’s the way to go.” Mickey shrugged.

  Then he turned around. Behind us the gate of one of the corrugated iron huts opened and revealed a truckload of the finest candy. But more amazing than any candy was the person standing in the gate. It was one of Mickey’s girl cousins. Wow! I had never seen anyone like her. Of course, I didn’t know too many girls, but I knew Zoe – and this girl was nothing like her.

  The Wild Bunch

  The way they told it, Zoe was even wilder than usual when she arrived at Camelot. In fact, she was downright agitated. The Wild Soccer Bunch had gathered in the tree house just before nine o’clock. Even Larry was there, although it would be his birthday in just a few hours. He was turning the big 4-0. But he wasn’t thinking about celebrating. Just like the others, he was listening to Zoe’s report. Standing tall in the center of Camelot, she was trying to contain her fury.

  “Danny, you were right!” she stated bitterly. “Julian is being blackmailed by Mickey the bulldozer.”

  Murmurs and hisses filled the hall on the ground floor of the tree house. Josh didn’t know what blackmail meant, so Kevin explained it to him.

  “If Julian had not given him the money for Larry’s birthday present, Mickey would have grabbed Josh.”

  More murmurs and hisses. The Wild Soccer Bunch balled their fists. Josh looked up at Zoe.

  “But where is Julian now?” He sounded desperate.

  Zoe didn’t answer. She bit her lip. Then she spoke so softly as if she didn’t want to hear her words herself.

  “They took him. Beyond the Grim Woods, even beyond the Prairie!”

  They all sucked in a breath, shocked.

  Nobody had expected that. The Prairie was not part of the world of the Wild Soccer Bunch. It was the world of their sworn enemies, the Unbeatables. The Wild Soccer Bunch had no power there, and none of them had ever dared to even go there. But as the church bell rang midnight, their fate was sealed.

  Josh wiped the tears off his face and looked at Kevin and Danny. But even the wildest of the Wild Soccer Bunch were paralyzed. This had nothing to do with soccer. This wasn’t a game any more. This was serious. It was beyond serious. It was terrifying. It was beyond anything any of them had ever experienced.

  Kevin the star striker, a guy who wasn’t afraid of anything, pushed his fingernails into his palms until the pain was too much to bear; he hit the wall with his fist.

  Danny, the world’s fastest midfielder, bit his fingernails.

  Zoe the fearless looked at Tyler, our number 10, the heart and soul and inspiration of the Wild Soccer Bunch.

  Not even Tyler had an answer. He looked to Fabio the wizard.

  But Fabio, son of soccer God, Ribaldo of the Furies, couldn’t think of anything either and started to pray.

  Kyle the invincible was no longer invincible and Joey the magician was so consumed by fear that you could almost see his magic float away.

  Diego the tornado fought his asthma, a sure sign he was scared, while Roger the hero paced anxiously, tearing at his hair, speechless. It was as if he had lost his voice, just like Alex.

  But Alex the cannon Alexander was the only one of the Wild Soccer Bunch who wasn’t about to be scared off. He looked to Larry, the best coach in the world, struggled and struggled and then said more than he had in two years. “Forget the Devil’s Pit and the league. Julian is our friend and I won’t play without him.”

  Larry met Alex’s glance. Slowly a smile began playing around Larry’s mouth and his eyes beamed with joy.

  “Thanks, Alex,” he said. “This is the nicest birthday present anyone’s ever given me.”

  Alex smiled, too, but the rest of the Wild Soccer Bunch didn’t get it. What did Larry mean? They had already lost me, now they were supposed to give up on everything else, too? Everything they cared so much about? Their team, the Devil’s Pit, and the league? Larry couldn’t seriously expect this. But Larry silenced their protests. He pushed back his baseball cap and scratched his forehead. He always did that when he was serious.

  “Well,” he began, “I’d like to help you. I mean if you let me. I am your coach, and this has to do with soccer, too. Unless you are ready to skip tomorrow’s game.”

  He looked at the Wild Soccer Bunch and waited until the spark of understanding and relief filled the room.

  “Okay,” he nodded. “Glad you’re ready to fight. I knew you would be, and so I came prepared. Let me show you.”

  Larry got up and the Wild Soccer Bunch followed. He asked them to wait in front of the tree house as he left the yard. Ten minutes later he came back on his moped. It moaned and groaned as it pulled a trailer behind it with a sky-high load.

  Larry stopped in front of the tree house, turned off the moped, and looked at his team.

  “This should work. Kevin, Danny, Zoe, and Tyler! You ride to the Grim Woods and get Julian’s bike. Then you find Mickey and challenge him. But really challenge him, you know what I mean? Tease him. Get him angry. Get him all dazed and confused. Then grab Julian and come back here. Mickey will follow you. Make sure of that. Got it?”

  Kevin, Danny, Zoe, and Tyler did their best to swallow their fear.

  They nodded at first but then someone said “No, we didn’t get it. Can you repeat that?”

  “No, I can’t,” Larry said. “We don’t have enough time. We have to make Camelot a fortress. Fabio, Diego, Alex, Josh, Roger, Kyle, and Joey! Come on, help me.”

  He pulled the tarp off his trailer and revealed a collection of trash cans, water guns, nets, rope, soap, a steamer, an electric pump, a bag of feathers and a huge pot of honey.

  The Wild Soccer Bunch stared at him. Kevin did this funny thing with his eyebrows whenever he was deep in thought.

  “What kind of fortress do you have in mind?” he asked skeptically.

  “The best fortress in the world. Mickey won’t show up alone and he won’t show up unarmed. We have to be prepared for anything.”

  The Wild Soccer Bunch froze. Honey, soap, and feathers against the Unbeatables, who’d show up with bats and chains? They might as well turn the Devil’s Pit into a miniature golf course.

  But Larry was serious. He was already unloading his trailer.

  “What’s up? What are you waiting for? Let’s be prepared or Mickey will come and kidnap you just like he did Julian and take you to the Prairie!”

  “Excuse me? Did I just hear you correctly?” asked a voice that seemed a bit out of place among the Wild Soccer Bunch. Larry turned around and there was my mom, coming out of the kitchen.

  “Where did you say my son was? Who took whom to the Prairie?”

  Larry paced, pushed his baseball cap into his neck three times, and finally scratched his forehead.

  “Well, I don’t know if you should get involved. You might get upset. Then again you might want to help us.”

  My mother crinkled her nose. Her expression grew dark. The volcano was about to erupt. Josh knew instantly what was coming. But he also knew that you cannot stop a volcano from erupting. Unless you are Larry, the best coach in the world.

  “So what do you say?” Larry asked. “Will you help us?

  When Larry told me what my mom did next, it blew my mind. She nodded. She agreed to help! But she looked worried. Larry reassured her, rummage
d in his toolbox, and slapped an electric screwdriver in her open hand. “I’ll explain on the way. Let’s go boys and girls.”

  Someone asked, “But what about the game?” and Larry said, “I postponed it.” Then he turned to the rest of the Wild Soccer Bunch and grinned: “That’s what floodlights are for!”

  On a Tightrope

  The howling wind carried the ten chimes of the church bell all the way to the Prairie. Clouds raced along the sky and the smell of fall hung in the air. But the Unbeatables didn’t seem to notice or care. They bounced and tossed and waved the bags they got at the Outlaw’s Nest, roaring and hollering. The three girl cousins giggled. Or rather, the two who looked like Mickey, giggled.

  The third girl was different. She walked quietly along with us, stealing an occasional glance at me. Yech. Why did she do that? And why did I get that weird feeling in my stomach when she did?

  I tried to ignore her. But I didn’t have to look at her to see her eyes, her long brown hair, and her face. As we walked along, she came closer and closer to me and when she accidentally bumped into me, I shivered.

  It scared me, but it also made me feel better. The red eyes of the rats scurrying around us now looked like harmless glowworms. The fall wind felt refreshing and I was almost glad to be here on the Prairie and not in the Devil’s Pit or at Camelot.

  I realized that this must have been what my mom and dad felt before the Grim Woods separated them.

  I felt light. The Graffiti Towers appeared on the horizon and they no longer looked scary or foreboding.

  At the same time, I was told later that Danny, Zoe, and Kevin stood near the ruins in the Grim Woods and tied my bike to Tyler’s back. Then they all jumped on their mountain bikes and rode through the high weeds onto the Prairie. The clouds raced above them and with serious expressions on their faces, they fought the wind as they took the usual route to the Graffiti Towers.