Julian the Mighty

by Joachim Masannek

  Suddenly Zoe pointed at the right tower.

  “There! Do you see it? What is that?”

  One shooting star after another crossed the sky. I saw them too.

  At another part of the Prairie, Mickey the Bulldozer saw the same thing.

  “Woweee!” howled Mickey the bulldozer and “Woweee-ee-ee!” came the echo of the Unbeatables.

  We stood in front of an old out of service power pole and looked up at Octopus. The guy with the Mohawk, Grim Reaper, was swinging on the pole 20 feet above the ground, pulling up a rope with one of the candy bags tied to the end. He took it off and fastened it on a hook. When he let go, the bag started to slide along a steel cable, accelerating, going faster and faster, all the way to the next power pole about 100 feet away where an old warehouse was squatting in the dark like a giant tombstone. The sparks in its wake lit the night sky like shooting stars.

  “Woweee!” Mickey howled again and “Woweee-ee-ee!” came the echo of the Unbeatables.

  The girl next to me laughed and I joined in. Every time a bag raced along the cable we closed our eyes and made a wish. My wish was always the same: that my father would come to the Devil’s Pit and see me play. Fat chance of that happening. It seemed like good things didn’t happen to me anymore, so there was no way my wish would come true. Even if I did find my father here, I’d never be one of the Wild Soccer Bunch again.

  Mickey’s voice cut through my thoughts.

  “Hey, Defenderless!” he yelled. “Your turn!”

  I stared at him. He couldn’t be serious. The power pole was twice as high as the old bridge we jumped off before the game against the Furies. And there was no water under the pole; nothing to soften a fall. Give me a break! This was no dare. This was crazy!

  “What’s the matter, loser?” Mickey yelled. “I thought you were one of us now. That’s what you wanted, right?”

  I just glared at him. This guy was totally nuts.

  “Thought so,” Mickey rambled on. “Well, prove it. Consider this your test. Like trying out for a new team. Make sense?”

  No, it didn’t make any sense at all, but neither did anything else in my life right now, so I swallowed hard. I was scared like never before but there was no turning back. With a last glance at the girl, I climbed up the power pole.

  Octopus was already up there, waiting for me. He had a sadistic grin on his face when he handed me the wire with the two wooden handles.

  “Let her rip!” he said. “Slide down the steel cable all the way to the warehouse! See the bags? Just like them!”

  I nodded.

  “That’s where the cable goes back up,” he went on. “Wait until you slow down, right after you pass the warehouse.”

  “Then what?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

  He grinned. “Then you let go!” Then after an ominous pause he added, “But don’t wait too long.”

  “W-why not?” I asked. “If I go too far I’ll just come back, right?”

  “Not a chance,” Octopus grinned. “Any idea what happens to the plastic bags over there?”

  I didn’t, of course, and I had no clue what he was getting at. Octopus grabbed the last bag with candy, hung it on the cable and let it go, and like a shooting star, it raced down to the warehouse and beyond.

  “Keep your eyes on the bag!” Octopus reminded me.

  I squinted and then I saw it. Just before the next power pole, a three-foot metal beam attached to the steel cable, automatically disconnected the hook from the cable. The bag twirled off the cable and crashed straight into a concrete wall.

  “BAM!” Octopus explained, “Timing is everything. If I were you, I’d let go.”

  I swallowed hard and looked down at Mickey standing below me. Doing this was my only chance, so I threw the handles over the steel cable and jumped.

  “I am Julian Fort Knox the all-in-one defenderrrrrr!” I yelled as loud as I could, and with a trail of sparks behind me like the tail of a comet, high above the ground, I raced across the Prairie. The warehouse and the wall of doom flew at me incredibly fast.

  “Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy,” I repeated over and over to myself as the wind rushed over my face and the warehouse loomed large.

  The metal beam that would disconnect my handles from the cable raced toward me. There was no stopping this. I would have to jump or I’d be thrown straight at the wall. One-Two-Three-WILD! And I let go!

  I saw the large pile of cardboard boxes right underneath me and when I let go, there was a long, weightless drop, then WHAM! I crashed into them.

  Lying on my back, for a moment I thought I was dead. But then somebody called my name and at first I thought it was an angel. No, the voice was familiar. It was one of the Wild Soccer Bunch! Then there were more voices shouting at me. I shook the cobwebs out of my head. It was four of the wildest guys in the whole wide world!

  “Julian! Julian, where are you? Dude! We have to get out of here!” they yelled as they dug through the cardboard boxes, looking for me.

  I was paralyzed. Where did they come from? And what did they want? Did they just want their money? Or did they want me? After all, I was a thief. Wasn’t I?

  Four faces appeared right above me: Kevin, Tyler, Danny, and Zoe.

  “Why didn’t you say anything?! Julian, thank God you’re alive. We need you. We can’t play in the Devil’s Pit without our all-in-one defender! We wouldn’t play without you. Ever.”

  Wait a minute. Did I just hear what I thought I heard? I was totally confused. “Do you really mean that?” I said, crawling out. I was overwhelmed.

  That’s when the Grim Reaper appeared above us. He jumped straight into the cardboard boxes, got up quickly, and began pummeling me: “I knew it! You’re nothing but a stinking little traitor!”

  Kevin, Danny, and Tyler jumped on him and tied his hands behind his back with his own bicycle chain and shoved a paper bag over his head. “What’s this weirdo talking about?” Kevin asked.

  “He’s out there where the buses don’t run,” I answered. “They all are. They thought I joined their team.”

  We all laughed uproariously at how dumb the whole thing was and how utterly ridiculous Grim Reaper looked, all tied up with a bag over his head.

  “Let’s get out of here!” Kevin said, grabbing me. “This place gives me the creeps!” And together we ran to our bikes. They were loaded with the plastic bags from the Outlaw’s Nest.

  A hiss announced the next Unbeatable on the steel cable. Judging by the huge shadow, it had to be Mickey himself.

  “Hurry!” Kevin rushed us along, but the Unbeatables had beat us to it and blocked our retreat, standing guard right behind our bikes, holding them hostage.

  Then Mickey the bulldozer crashed into the pile of boxes.

  This was it. The end of the line for Wild Soccer Bunch defense.

  Suddenly the headlights of a familiar pick-up truck lit up the night. It screeched to a stop right in front of us.

  “Come on!” I said. “They won’t hurt us any more!” And as if in response to what I said, the driver got out of the truck.

  He just stood there, tall and imposing, and watched us run to our bikes. The Unbeatables didn’t move a muscle and silently watched us disappear across the Prairie. When we reached the other side, we stopped and looked back at Mickey and the Unbeatables.

  Mickey exploded. He noticed Grim Reaper on the ground, desperately trying to pull the paper bag off his head. On the bag, Tyler had drawn a perfect rendition of the Wild Soccer Bunch logo and the words, “Don’t mess with the Wild Soccer Bunch!”

  Mickey screamed louder than I’d ever heard him, loud enough to be heard in Peoria. “This isn’t over, you twerps! We’re coming for you tonight! We know where you hang out, Defenderless. We’ll show you what we do to traitors!”

  “That guy is delusional,” Kevin laughed.

  I didn’t think it was so funny. I knew he meant it. I guess we all did. We knew they would come to Camelot, and we raced off to prepare fo
r battle.

  The Battle for Camelot

  With Mickey’s threat at our backs, we flew over the Prairie and through the Grim Woods and we didn’t hit the brakes until we got to Dearborn Street. “Larry!” we yelled up at the tree house. “It worked. They’re on their way!”

  Everything got real quiet and everyone who was working at Camelot stopped their tools, except for my mother’s electric drill. She accidentally pressed the button on the handle and didn’t let go and it whined and whined. She didn’t even notice it when she demanded an explanation. I could see she had been terribly worried and I went to her and hugged her. Neither of us said a word for a moment or two. All I heard was the whining of the electric drill in my ear.

  Larry gently took the drill from my mother’s hand. “I think it’s best if we go inside.”

  My mother looked at him, kind of wild. She wanted to say something else, but Larry stopped her.

  “It’s okay, Mrs. Phillips. You helped a lot. But now it’s time to let the Wild Soccer Bunch do what they have to do.”

  My mother hesitated. She looked long and hard at me, and finally managed a smile. I could see that she was fighting with herself, just like I had been fighting with myself. I think we both won that night. She did something only the world’s best mother can do. She nodded and without another word she followed Larry inside.

  We waited until they were gone. Then we took our positions. Mickey the Bulldozer and his Unbeatables were really bad characters and we had to make a stand against their bullying, once and for all.

  It was quiet after 10 o’clock. Even the wind had died down. Zoe, who sat next to me on the second floor of Camelot, looked at me, biting her lip.

  “I’m scared.”

  “I know,” I nodded. “Everyone is, including me.” I paused. “Especially me.”

  I tried to smile, and so did she.

  “No worries. I won’t tell anyone,” she whispered. “And I’m super glad you are back with us, Julian Fort Knox, our very own all-in-one defender. That’s really a mouthful. We should work on that name. Fine tune it.”

  Suddenly a blood curdling howl filled the air. “Arroooo!”

  Then the fence moaned and the garden door fell closed. Three racing heartbeats later, the shadows of the Unbeatables peeled out of the dark night, armed to the teeth with crowbars, bicycle chains, and baseball bats that glistened in the moonlight.

  “Arroooo!” Mickey the bulldozer lifted his arm and stopped his gang.

  He looked around suspiciously, barely 30 feet away from us. After all, this wouldn’t have been the first time he’d lose out against us. But this time everything was in his favor. And we all knew it.

  “Hello! Anyone home?” he yelled and took three steps forward. He seemed more amused than anything else. He was not even armed.

  “I’m looking for the wild soccer dweebs. Are they here? Or are they hiding behind their mommy?”

  He laughed. We steamed.

  “Just you wait,” Fabio hissed. Then he said something in Portuguese. We had no idea what it was, but when he was done, he seemed satisfied with himself. We were pretty sure whatever it was, it was about Mickey and it wasn’t nice.

  Roger lifted his water pistol ready to shoot, but Kevin held him back.

  “No, not yet!” he murmured firmly.

  “Well, when?” Fabio hissed. “It’ll be too late when they attack.”

  “No, it won’t be,” Kevin said. “Trust the plan. I promise, none of these jerks will get to Camelot.”

  “Okay,” Fabio said, unsure. “I hope you’re right.”

  Mickey took another step closer.

  “This is your last chance, boys and girls!” he announced as if he was some mafia boss. “Hand over the candy! It belongs to me! And give us Julian Fort Knox, the all-in-one defenseless, and nobody gets hurt.”

  That was the magic word. Josh got ready. It was his turn to protect me and he was ready for anything.

  But wait! Before I continue telling the story, I have to ask a small favor of you. I know; I’ve been a disappointment so far. Twice I asked you to swear an oath and then I couldn’t deliver. But this is not about me any more. It’s about my friends. So please, do me the favor. Close the book, put your hand on the Wild Soccer Bunch logo, and observe a moment of silence. I want you to think about whether you want us to still be around tomorrow. And if you do, send all your good thoughts to the Wild Soccer Bunch now. They deserve it. I don’t know anyone else who has done so much for me; anyone who has risked as much and forgiven so much. So please, do me the favor. We can use all the help we can get; because in all honesty, Kevin was the only one who thought that the Unbeatables would not reach the tree house. OMG!

  “Hey, up there? Are you deaf?!” Mickey threatened again. “I’m not kidding, this is your very last chance. Hand over the candy and tell Julian to get down here! And we’ll leave quietly. Otherwise–.” I peered down at him through a knothole just as he ran a finger under his throat.

  That’s when Josh jumped up, angry as a crazed chipmunk. He was high up in Camelot’s tower, the third floor of our tree house, and yelled down to Mickey. “Hey moron, we won’t let you go until you give us back our money! Fork it over now and we’ll let you live!”

  If I could have reached all the way up and high-fived my little brother, I would have done it, trust me on that.

  Meanwhile, Mickey the bulldozer looked up at Josh, incredulous. Actually, he looked like a hungry alligator. He lifted his claw to signal attack, but at that exact same moment, Joey and Kyle pulled two switches on the lowest floor. Floodlights turned on everywhere and blinded the attackers.

  “Help! I can’t see! Turn off those lights!” The Unbeatables sounded really scared. Then Kevin opened fire.

  Zoe, Fabio, Diego, and I appeared in the windows and hatches of Camelot and shot our super blasters at the staggering, blinded, Unbeatables and they ran around in circles like one foot was nailed to the floor, slamming into each other, everyone wailing like they were at nursery school during recess.

  Mickey the bulldozer was blasted twice before he knew what hit him.

  “Unbeatables! It’s just squirt guns, you idiots! Re-group! Re-group! Let’s go! Attack! Attack! We’re not going to let a few puny squirt guns stop us!”

  Mow-down, Juggernaut, and Humungous didn’t need a reminder. With a horrifying battle cry, they lifted their crowbars and axes and stormed the doors of Camelot.

  Tyler and Alex sat above them on the second floor veranda and like two puppeteers, they pulled a bunch of strings leading down to the ground underneath the tree house. Big blocks of wood suddenly appeared out of the grass, tripping Mow-down, Juggernaut, and Humungous and they fell flat on their faces. The earth shook as they hit the ground and their monstrous battle cries became squeaky screams of fear as they slid across the soap-covered tarp and twirled out of control right at some tipped-over open trash cans! First Humungous slammed into the first one and got stuck headfirst, then Mow-Down, then Juggernaut. They didn’t know what hit them and all three of them were hopelessly stuck inside. The last thing I heard was a chorus of terrified squeaky echoes coming from inside the trash cans, their feet sticking out and flapping like seals. I wanted to throw them a fish, but I had to get back to the battle.

  Tyler and Alex high-fived each other and Danny bent over laughing. They almost didn’t hear the warning from the tower.

  “Grim Reaper and Octopus approaching at two o’clock! Danny! You’re up!”

  “Copy that!” Danny shouted. Josh was angry as a hornet, but Danny remained cool. Sitting in a fork in the tree, he waited for the jerks to attack. They swung their bats and crowbars. “Hey, dipstick!” Danny welcomed them. “Please make sure your tray tables are in an upright position and your seat belts are securely fastened!”

  Octopus and Grim Reaper froze and stared up at Danny, who whipped out a pocket knife and cut the nylon cord in front of him.

  “Enjoy your flight!” he said, as a sandbag dropped from the tr
ee pulling a rope connected to a net that engulfed Octopus and Grim Reaper and pulled them up as fast as the sandbag fell down, trapping them in the net and suspending them 8 feet off the ground.

  “Outstanding!” Danny was impressed. “That leaves only Kong, the giant prairie dog!”

  He stared straight at Kong’s butt. The jerk had crept up to the terrace without being seen. Now he was right in the middle of us. Tyler and Alex had no idea they were in imminent danger. Danny had to do something. But if he warned them, they might panic. Danny jumped out of his spot, leaped from the third to the second floor, and waved at Kong like he was sending him off to reform school.

  “Hey, King Kong!” he yelled. “Didn’t anyone teach you how to knock?”

  Kong forgot about Tyler and Alex. He turned and furiously went for Danny, who ducked him like a bar of slippery soap, and led Kong to the hall, where a Kong-sized trap door was waiting for him. He fell right through it and slid down Josh’s water slide and careened into the doghouse. Danny raced down and locked him in. “Nice doggy! If you’re good, I’ll get you fixed!” Kong, from inside the dog house, for the first time in his life, squealed like a frightened puppy.

  The only one left was Mickey. He wasn’t armed and looked like easy pickings. But looks can be deceiving.

  “Oh Mr. Bulldozer!” Roger called from somewhere in the tree house. “I can see you shaking from here! Are you cold? Or just scared? Do you want me to call your mommy? What do you want me to tell her?”

  Mickey’s beady little eyes twitched as his internal power supply glitched and looked like static on a TV screen. But then he turned on the brute force and his eyes turned into pinwheels, twirling in the night. At that moment, he looked like 200 pounds of unbridled, blubbering meanness!

  Danny, still standing next to the doghouse, jumped up and climbed back up the tree.