Chapter Thirteen
Between cooking, cleaning, caring for Thomas Jr. now in every way possible except feeding him, loving Thomas in any way she could imagine, Anna lost track of time. They had gone into town and even though Anna knew it was long shot, she still checked with the post office. But no mail had come for her. She knew it would be a while still before her sister or Mary would have a chance to write back to her.
If they even did.
That thought though didn’t bother her as much as it would have a few weeks ago.
And that’s when Anna’s mind kicked in.
A few weeks ago.
She tried to exactly pinpoint when she had mailed the letters to Abigail and Mary. The more she thought, the more she scrambled until the days and weeks started to line up. Then a realization came to Anna.
It had been over a month.
Actually, it had been five weeks total.
Five weeks then became six, seven, and finally at eight weeks, Anna woke one morning to make breakfast and the urge to be sick hit her out of nowhere with no chance of stopping it. As she became sick, both Jo and Thomas were at her sides, checking on her.
“Are you ill?” Thomas asked, his voice touching on desperation.
“No,” Anna said. “I just had to... vomit...”
The urge passed and Anna stood back up, feeling okay. She looked at Jo and Jo tried to hide a smile that couldn’t be stopped.
“Why are you smiling?” Thomas snapped at her.
“Nothing,” Jo said. “Let me check on Thomas Jr..”
Jo left the kitchen and Thomas touched Anna’s arm. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Fine,” Anna said.
She finished breakfast and even ate. She had a second helping which didn’t seem smart, but her body begged for the food. After that, each morning, almost on a schedule she vomited one time. By the fourth day, she worried she had come down with something serious. Thomas felt the same and when she did vomit, he was there, touching her back, his face looking horribly worried.
But Jo never looked worried, not one bit.
She always smiled. Of all things to do while a person was so sick!
It wasn’t until the seventh morning of becoming sick did Anna finally grow tired of it. She wept after being sick, running from the kitchen, scared to death of what it could mean. She cried on the bed and it was Jo who opened the door.
Jo smiled again and sat next to Anna, right there on the bed.
“I know it’s scary, sweet Anna,” Jo whispered.
“Scary? How would you know? I’m sick, Jo, and I don’t know what it means. Did I eat something? Did I catch something in town? Jo... will I die?”
“Oh my heavens,” Jo said, “you really haven’t figured it out, have you?”
Anna’s stomach rumbled. Now came the hunger. She touched her stomach and felt that it was slightly harder than before. Almost like it was trying to push itself out. Like... like she...
“Anna,” Jo said, “you’re pregnant.”
She looked at Jo and just like that the room began to spin. Just like that first day she met Thomas and felt her knees buckle, this time Anna’s entire body buckled. She fell towards Jo and then everything went black.
Within that blackness Anna heard a voice whispering, over and over, taunting her, teasing her, breaking her heart each time she heard it.
You’re pregnant... you’re pregnant... you’re pregnant...
When Anna opened her eyes, she found herself whispering, “I’m pregnant...”
“Anna, look at me,” Jo’s voice said. “Look at me right now.”
Anna’s eyes fluttered as Jo came into view. Jo held her and gently sat her back up on the bed.
“Jo... what did you say that for?” Anna asked.
“You are,” Jo whispered. “Can’t you see it?”
“How? Why?”
“Sweet Anna, you and Thomas have been together... quite a bit... and you’re sick each morning, you eat like a horse would eat...”
“I’m pregnant?” Anna asked, trying to allow herself to actually hear the words and understand what they meant.
“I’m not a doctor, sweet Anna, but I’ve seen it enough times to know,” Jo said.
Anna held her stomach again, pressing harder for a few seconds, wishing she could feel more proof. Of course, if she were pregnant it wasn’t that far along at all, meaning there was no chance a baby could move and give her a sign of life.
But... a baby? In her womb?
Anna shook her head. She took her hands off her stomach and put them to the bed.
“There’s no way,” Anna said. “Just... no way...”
Anna stood and felt woozy. Dizzy. Her stomach rolled and contracted a few times. She put her hands out, trying to feel the difference between extreme hunger and the need to vomit. After a few seconds went by, Anna took a deep breath and moved towards the door. She looked over her shoulder at Jo, who still sat, so patiently, on the bed.
“Jo, I can’t,” Anna said. “You don’t understand. I can’t.”
Jo nodded but didn’t say a word. That bothered Anna more than anything Jo could have said, because sometimes silence spoke louder than words. Silence left Anna’s mind to fill in the blanks and that was something she didn’t like to do.
At all.
She walked back into the kitchen and a second later, Thomas was there, checking on her.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I’m fine,” Anna said. She looked at her husband and her mind screamed I’m pregnant! and Anna shuddered.
“You look worried.”
“A little,” Anna admitted. “I don’t like getting sick. But I’m okay right now and very hungry.”
“I think I should take you into town, to see Dr. Hibert. He’s a very nice man. A gentle man.”
Anna avoided the topic for the rest of the morning and day. Once breakfast was done, Thomas went to work. Of course Anna felt much better, her morning routine of illness and then eating had come and gone. The rest of the day Jo failed to bring the subject up and during a hearty lunch, Anna whistled and hummed, moving so fast and happily that her dress danced around her almost like a wide halo at her hips.
Thomas was so enamored by the sight he made it a point to hug his wife hard, even lifting her off her feet at one point.
“I see you feel better,” he said to Anna.
Anna touched Thomas’s face and smiled. “I told you I did. Something little, nothing to worry about. I bet I could get out in that field with you even.”
Thomas bellowed a laugh. “I’d rather you stay right here. Anna, I’ve never eaten so well in my life. And I’ve never felt so loved before.”
When Thomas made comments as such it left Anna fighting the urge to think about his former wife. Were they really happy? Were they in love like he and Anna were now? Did she truly care for him?
But Anna knew better than to bring that kind of stuff up. These were the present moments for she and Thomas. After Thomas left the kitchen, Anna looked down at her stomach and wondered if their future had already been claimed.
Thomas Jr. had been really fussy that day too. Nothing could ease the poor baby and without the ability to speak his feeling or ailments like a child or adult could, it was difficult to soothe him. When it came time to feed, he would silently suckle Jo’s breast but then let out a wail every minute or so. It attracted the attention of both Anna and Thomas who stood with Jo and Thomas Jr. in Jo’s small room, wondering what could be causing Thomas Jr. such discomfort. Anna feared the worst, knowing just how easy it was to lose a life. The world was a beautiful place, with all of God’s creation but it could sometimes be just as cruel. Thomas knew that and Anna didn’t need to really think about it at that moment.
Thomas put his arm around Anna and pulled her close. They stared at Thomas Jr. like mother and father, both caring and concerned.
“I wonder if I should take him to town,” Thomas said. “Dr. Hibert will see him
right now, no matter the hour I arrive.”
“I’m sure he would,” Jo said.
Thomas Jr. let out another wail and Anna stepped forward, almost instinctively.
“May I hold him?” Anna asked.
“Of course,” Jo said.
Anna took the baby and Jo dressed herself while Thomas watched Anna as she begin to rock the baby gently in her arms. It was such a beautiful moment for Anna, not just becoming a mother to Thomas Jr. or feeling like a mother to Thomas Jr., but she felt the love and need to protect the infant in her arms.
“Is he teething?” Anna asked.
She looked at Thomas and he had a blank stare on his face. Anna knew the worry Thomas must have felt each time something happened. It had to be a reminder of... Ann closed her eyes and thought about what Jo had said earlier.
Pregnant.
She opened her eyes and looked at Jo, needing more than just an answer to the question she posed.
“That would make sense,” Jo said. “He’s about the age.”
“Wouldn’t you feel it?” Thomas asked, his eyes dark and accusing.
“When the teeth break through the gums, yes,” Jo said. “But right now, he could just be in pain from the teeth pushing, trying to break through.”
Thomas nodded and Anna turned towards him, wanting to be as close as possible to Thomas while she held Thomas Jr.. Thomas touched Thomas Jr.’s head and looked down at his only son.
“Feel better soon,” Thomas whispered.
The sound of Thomas’s voice had an amazing effect on Thomas Jr. He quickly smiled and his arms moved, wanting his father.
“He just needs his father,” Anna whispered.
“No,” Thomas said. “He needs his parents.”
Anna smiled and Thomas hugged her gently as the three of them cuddled Thomas Jr., soothing him from his pain until he eventually fell asleep. Jo then retired to bed, saying she wanted extra sleep just in case Thomas Jr. got up a lot during the night if he was in pain. Anna quickly thanks Jo but explained it wasn’t her duty to do such a thing.
“I’ll wake you if he’s hungry,” Anna said. “You enjoy a long night of sleep. Tonight is actually nice and cool, perfect weather to sleep.”
“Fair enough,” Jo said with a smile.
That night after the house settled into its routine slumber, Thomas rolled towards Anna in bed, his hand becoming so accustomed to touching her breasts, Anna waited for it and let out a soft moan when he did so. It was like completing the day for her body and mind. But as Thomas began to kiss her mouth, always offering a sense of passion that made Anna feel like she was the most beautiful woman in the world, a slight achy feeling came across her chest. As Anna groaned, Thomas quickly stopped, knowing it wasn’t the same sound of pleasure that Anna normally offered.
“What’s wrong?” he whispered.
“Oh, nothing,” Anna said. “I love you, Thomas.”
Thomas loved her back, kissing her, touching her.
When Thomas took his hand from her breast, Anna felt a sense of relief but a mild tenderness was still present. It had nothing to do with Thomas’s touch. He wasn’t a rough man and even if he had been, this wasn’t the kind of tender pain that came from bruising or such. This was from... inside. That was the only way Anna could describe it.
Frankly, her breasts were tender.
And when Thomas moved between her legs, positioning his body and coming forward with that first gentle thrust as he always did, Anna’s body tightened and she had to place her lips to Thomas’s shoulder to keep from crying out. Her toes even curled because the pressure felt so intense. It was like everything inside her body was suddenly tender and achy.
Anna wanted to believe it was just coincidence that it was her female areas feeling this way, but she couldn’t deny it... it started to make a little more sense. Those were the areas given by God to reproduce and nourish.
She and Thomas enjoyed each other’s company and Thomas gave Anna one last goodnight kiss and fell asleep. But Anna remained awake. She touched her right breast and even just placing her hand on her breast gave her that tender feeling. Her hand moved down to her stomach and she felt the slight hardness again. She hadn’t eaten in hours so it wasn’t a full stomach kind of feeling.
It was definitely something else.
Maybe Jo was right...
Anna turned her head and saw the outline of her sleeping husband.
Tears rushed to her eyes as she imagined how to say it.
Thomas, I’m pregnant...
West For Love (A Mail Order Romance Novel) (1) (Anna & Thomas) Page 14