But it was the whole affair with Thomas which was the biggest thorn in my side, for no one even bothered to get my account of this or any matter. Or paid attention to the fact that I loved my brother and had never maneuvered politically, or that I was changed and trying. I was just a tarnished young woman, not any longer even a princess in their eyes.
Then the worst possible and unexpected thing happened. Lord Robert Tyrwhitt, the Master of the Horse while my father was yet alive, came to see me at Hatfield to interrogate me. I knew that the potential charges were great and that it could be my head on the chopping block if this man believed me to be a coconspirator against my brother the king.
He was a cold, cruel man, harsh in appearance, dress, and manner. He wanted me to be guilty. And this was who my brother sent.
When the appointed interview came, I was so flustered and nervous by his manner that I could not say a word to the man. I was so angered by his tone and his condescending address that my wits were completely taken from me. I stammered and wept as he accused, berated, and demanded, yet nothing was confessed and no sentence was delivered.
In desperation, I pulled my power to me, hoping that I would be able to make him go away. I pushed the words of my innocence at him. But for the first time, I saw the light go out as it touched the man. I tried again and again, but the light would not stay lit once it entered the man’s space.
I was beside myself with trepidation. What had happened? How was I to get out of this without the help of my gifts?
After the interrogation, I wondered at my cowed behavior, for now that the man had gone out of my sight and his accusing words repeated in my mind, I had a response to each. I berated myself harshly and wished he could have been fetched back at that moment when my rage could be used to my benefit.
But I would get my chance, for he interviewed me many times in the preceding weeks, and I was able to hold myself together on those occasions and answer him honestly. But I was never able to manipulate him with my power. And there was nothing to say except that I was not involved in the plot, nor had I accepted any marriage proposal. I had no proof but my own words.
We were at an impasse.
After getting nothing from me in these interviews, he stayed away for a fortnight. I used that time to determine what could possibly be happening with my gift. After easily manipulating several in my company, I came to the conclusion that Sir Robert Tyrwhitt must be so against me that his mind could not be touched.
When he came again, I was determined to control myself if only to see if I could get a little doubt in his mind and thus hopefully be able to use my gift. Besides, the man needed to be put in his place.
As I sat down across from him, I noticed that he seemed to be in better spirits as well. However, his first words cut my determination to dust.
“I have brought my wife to look after you until Lady Katherine can be returned. I am sure you will find her most pleasing, my Princess. She is at this moment settling her things in Lady Katherine’s old chambers.” He smiled and pulled some papers from his bag.
The shock of this information did not entirely tie my tongue. I had enough wit to demand, “Where is Katherine Ashley and when will she be returned to me?”
Tyrwhitt straightened his rumpled doublet and said with a raised eyebrow, “It is I who will be asking the questions, my Princess. You must only worry about having answers this time.” He always said “my Princess” with a sneer.
I glared at him haughtily and clenched my teeth together.
He must have understood that I would not be moved to speak until I knew the answer to my question, for soon he acquiesced in a matter-of-fact voice. “She and Thomas Parry are being held in the Tower, and they will not be returned until we are satisfied that they have committed no crimes.”
I gasped. The Tower. How I feared that place, for no person left unscathed. Tears filled my eyes and I did not realize I was crying until Tyrwhitt handed me a handkerchief. He did not pause though, for he must take his advantages when he could. He took two pieces of parchment and held them up for me to see. They were filled with words, stamped at the bottom, and official looking. The one on top was in a hand I knew as well as my own.
“What is this?” I said through my tears. “Are they confessions? Did Kat confess?”
Tyrwhitt smiled at me as if he had won a great game. “Yes, they are confessions.”
That made me cry even harder. “Is Kat still alive, you false wretch? She would have to be dead from torture if she truly confessed to any sort of involvement in this horrid plot.”
That changed Tyrwhitt’s smile and I took the papers from his hand. He snatched them back hastily and said, “I would have you tell me of all your involvement with Admiral Thomas Seymour over the last year, my Lady Princess.” He tried to make his voice kindly, though all he managed to do was twist his mouth so that he looked like a stifled bear.
I sniffed at him, but I knew that I had to tell all I knew, for this situation had just gotten very serious for me. Kat was in the Tower, and for all I knew only I could save her. “I have only had letters from him since September. I have kept them all, but I do not believe it necessary for you to read them. All they say is how he loves me and wants to marry me. I am sure you know that I would not consent to anything without the council’s approval. Even if I wanted to marry the blathering fool, I would not sink that low.” I sniffed and wiped my nose with his handkerchief.
“You say that you do not want to marry the Admiral, yet you did have an affair with him this past year.” He did not look ashamed at his words, only angry.
“I did not, not in the way everyone wants to make it out to be.” I said with sincere shock. How dare this man say such a scandalous thing right in front of me. It would have been true had we not been caught, but the audacity of this man was beyond anything I had seen.
He shook the papers and yelled, “Katherine Ashley admits to seeing you romp with him in your bed and she also told us of a situation where she caught him cutting your dress off.” A light shone in his eyes and I became certain that he was enjoying this. “Both she and Master Parry state that the Admiral planned to marry you and even asked after your accounts. Why would such a thing be done if there were no agreements of marriage?”
Poor Kat. What had they done to her to make her confess such useless yet personally disgraceful things? I lifted my head indignantly and said, “I do not have to confess to you or any other person the circumstances of my life. You are not here to question me about this matter. I do have one confession to make and it is on point: I had nothing to do with this plot against the king. I never would have involved myself in something such as this, especially not now when I am already exiled. Nothing could induce me to move against my beloved Edward. Nothing. Especially not something so silly as getting a husband. Furthermore, why would I go against the wishes of my beloved father? Sir, you accuse me of betraying two of the dearest men in the world. I would not do it!”
“What if the council were to give their consent to marry him?” he said gently.
“Then I suppose I would have to do whatever thing God put into my head at that time,” I said shortly and with a grimace on my face.
“But you do not say you would not.” He paused, seeming moved for a moment by my words but still convinced he had the right of it. “The point I am trying to make is whether you are in the Admiral’s pocket so deeply that you have—perhaps unknowingly—aided or encouraged him to usurp the Lord Guardian and take control of the king. Your friends do not believe that you are impartial to the Admiral as you now claim.” He looked at the confessions. “Lady Katherine in particular recounts several circumstances that show how in his power you were.”
“‘Were’ is the correct word, my good sir. Were! Yet it has been some time now since I have overcome the follies of my earlier youth. I am certain that Kat also told of my reluctance to even reply to the Admiral’s recent letters. She practically forced me to do it. She wanted me to marry him
in order to clear my name. But I have proof enough that I have committed no sin. I am certain you have seen my letters to the Admiral. There is no affection in them. There is only acknowledgment and warning.”
“Warning you say. Warning of what? Admit it girl, you knew of his plans and were party to them.” Tyrwhitt was all in a rage now for he thought he had found the weak link in my story.
I gritted my teeth, but I could not stop the tears from flowing down my face. It was all so humiliating and evil for him to pounce on my every word and twist them to fit his own ends. And how dare he call me girl! Instinctively I called the power of the light to me and felt its sure presence, but I had to be so careful if I was to instill doubt in his mind.
The light brought peace. What would be would be, and if I were to be a servant of the Most High God, he would see me through this and much worse as he raised me to the place he needed me in.
I dried my eyes and looked calmly at my interrogator. “I am not the only person who was aware of the stupidity of Admiral Thomas Seymour. Who is the man that has brought him down?”
Tyrwhitt’s eyes narrowed. “I have the feeling that you know who it was as well as I.”
“Does not everyone now know? What I am saying is that it was not a very good secret that Thomas was in trouble. If you have read the two letters I sent him, you will understand instantly what I did about what I knew.”
Awkwardly, the man pulled out of his bag the letters in question.
“Yes,” I said as I eyed them dubiously. “It is the longer of the two. Read it out if you must, I will wait.”
He did read it and I saw the understanding dawn on his face as now the context of the letter was clear to him. When he looked up at me I saw uncertainty in his eyes.
“I still believe that you and your friends have made a pact to tell the same story and that you were involved somehow,” he said, but his voice did not contain the strength it had before.
“I am not interested in what you believe, sir. I am interested in the truth, as any child of God should be. As you can see, I told the Admiral that he was a fool and that I would do nothing without the council’s permission, which I hoped he would never get. I had nothing to do with this plot. I barely have anything to do with the Admiral, except the role I play in his own mind.” I decided now was the time to push my advantage. I gathered the light and said the words that I hoped would convince the man or rather motivate him to move on.
“Now go back to the court and tell them you found me innocent of any wrong doing.” Then I quickly added before sending the light. “Also let them know that the rumors of pregnancy could not be true. For if it were so, I would have been in my birthing bed the first time you saw me.” I shoved the light at him a little more violently than was necessary, but I was angry.
He needed no more than that. I saw the expression in his eyes change as he said, “I can see now that you were completely uninvolved. I am sorry to have wasted your time and I pray that you have not been offended by my words or manners.” He smiled at me and rose. Then as quickly as he had arrived, he bowed his way out.
I sat in my chair for a long moment, wondering if I’d needed to use my power. I believed that perhaps I could have gotten my own self out of trouble. As these thoughts and ponderings came to me, I drew another line for myself. A line that involved using my power as only a last resort. God had given me a sharp mind and a mostly guileless attitude. I could prove myself without power. Especially when I was innocent.
Relieved as I was that the interrogation was over, I was soon cursing myself for not thinking to tell Sir Tyrwhitt to get Kat back for me, for now I had Lady Beth Tyrwhitt to deal with.
If Kat was the kindly butterfly that fluttered near my side, guiding me with quiet council, expressing love and befriending me in every situation, Lady Tyrwhitt was the watchdog always on duty, barking commands and growling at everything and everyone. She was a loathsome creature, always there in my ear, judging my every word and step, forcing me to spend all day in the schoolroom and all evening sewing. She was a mean gossip, taking every opportunity to slander Kat, denouncing her as unfit to be anyone’s governess and even saying my ruin was the result of her ineffectual governing.
I despised the awful, sharp-nosed prattler more than I had despised anyone in my life. She was my true punishment for all my lustful fantasies, the worst punishment anyone could have pronounced.
The only good thing that came from Lady Tyrwhitt’s presence was that I truly began to blossom under Doctor Ascham’s style of tutelage. If I had seemed promising before, now, with so much of my day and effort extended to the books, I surpassed even his expectations.
I was further grateful to him for his hand in repairing my honor. He was a most discreet gossip and had many correspondents to whom his praise of me and my attitude did not go unaccounted.
When first at Cheshunt, Anthony Denny and Kat requested that I begin to repair my reputation by appearances, so I had taken to wearing the most plain and modest dresses with no jewelry except my mother’s necklace, which mostly stayed hidden under high-necked frocks. My modest and virginal appearance was marked now by not only the friends of Dr. Ascham, but all those whom I saw. By the middle of February, I finally began to feel that I might be able to gain back my previous standing.
Only a few weeks later I received word that Thomas had been condemned and would be beheaded within the month. Shock and horror did not begin to describe the state I was in and there was no Kat to comfort me.
I wondered also who comforted Edward, for Thomas was his mother’s brother. Killing one’s uncle was not an easy task, I ventured, and I wished I could write to him and comfort him as inappropriate as that might seem.
Everything was happening so quickly and as the time grew closer and the reality of it all reached my heart, I fretted in earnest over Thomas. I did not want him to die, for if he was put to death it would be—in a very real way—my fault. His actions were a result of my manipulation. How could I know that he would stoop to such foolish actions? I could not.
Still, there was the helplessness of being able to do nothing to stop him. I’d used my gift so horridly that a fear of it began. That and a resolution to never act thus again.
When I thought of how this punishment might spread to that of Kat and Master Parry, I couldn’t do anything but kneel at my prayer bench and beg God to spare them from the gallows. I wearied Sir Tyrwhitt and the Lord Protector with inquires and letters about them, but it seemed that they were quite forgotten for all of London was suddenly in turmoil. It appeared that the French were planning to come against us at Boulogne-sur-Mer, and that they had also landed in Edinburgh to help the Scottish fight us. Small rebellions were popping up all over the country, proving that the English were upset with their new king and his Lord Protector.
It did not take a genius to see where these troubles would take us. Unless Lord Edward Seymour could gather his forces, squash the rebellions, and keep control of my brother in the process, he was going to fall from the high position he now had, and I knew who would take his place.
Episode 10
March 1549
Hatfield House, Hertfordshire
Robert should have come to Hatfield by now for it was the middle of March and he was due at the beginning. His absence seemed to prove my theory that power at court was changing hands.
I waited for word from him, but instead only received word that Admiral Thomas Seymour was dead. He did not die easily, but the deed was done. I was surprised at the depth of my sorrow, but I could not show it, for Lady Tyrwhitt waited for my grief to overwhelm me and thus, in her eyes, condemn me. I kept it inside and analyzed it.
My conclusion was that I was not sadder for his death than any other person I knew well, but with his demise, my guilt and my fear increased exponentially, especially for Kat and Master Parry. If the Lord Protector and Edward could condemn and kill his own brother and uncle, would he stay his hand for two servants, whether they be innocent or no
t?
I begged Sir Robert Tyrwhitt, my jailer, to send for them to return. Still he would not, and furthermore he seemed annoyed at my deep devotion to Kat. If the man knew anything about loving a person, he certainly had fooled me, for I saw him with his wife and the lack of affection was astounding.
Not that I could see a reason to be affectionate to the woman.
For several days, my thoughts turned often to Thomas. It was amazing the way his demise yet again cleared my mind. I did feel sorrow for him, but I also remembered the way his mouth had captured me, how his hands had caressed, and how his pompous air had drawn me to him. I vowed I would never again be seduced by dangerous, lustful men. I would be on my guard should I ever come face to face with one, for I now knew myself to be weak for a man with sweet breath, beautiful lips and hands, and roguish manners. Heaven help me, but I was, and now I could stay away.
“Thank you, Thomas Seymour, for teaching me such an important lesson, and may God have mercy on your soul,” I whispered to myself before I drifted into sleep.
There I dreamt of my Robert. He was being crushed by something terribly heavy and I startled awake, barely able to find my breath and more worried for news of his whereabouts than ever before.
At the beginning of April, we received a letter informing us that Robert was training with the soldiers, for he was to help if needed with the civil unrest that seemed to be ravaging the countryside. With all the war that was about, there were not as many soldiers in London as one would hope, thus many second and third sons were taking up the banner of England to help restore order.
Panic gripped my soul. I remembered my dream. What would I do if Robert was killed in battle without knowing my love for him? How could I live without him? It was not possible. I spent so much time at my prayer bench that I think even Lady Tyrwhitt was impressed. Whether she was or not, it seemed that she did treat me a bit more kindly.
Elizabeth Tudor- Ancestry of Sorcery Page 24