Winning my Best Friend's Girl

by Piper Rayne

  “She’s just the one. The one who…”

  “Got away?”

  I shrug. “Ran away.”

  He pulls a stool over and straddles it in front of me. “But you never ran after her?”

  I shake my head.

  “That’s not like you. I feel like you run toward everything that’s scary.” He sips his beer. “Shit, that warehouse fire last year? You were the first one in.”

  I shrug again. “It’s different with her.”

  “How so?” He pours me another shot, thank God, and I down it before he has the top back on the bottle.

  “I’m not sure. She’s like a fire you can’t put out. One that just keeps going, but then again, I think I add fuel to the fire sometimes too.”

  “From what I saw, you add gasoline to the fire.”

  I nod. He’s right. I’ve been a complete jackass. “Yeah, I guess.”

  “But I can tell you one thing, Kingston. If it were me in your shoes just now, the last thing I would’ve done was beat the shit out of her boyfriend because he was kissing someone else. I would’ve been smiling like the cat that ate the canary. Listen, I’ve never loved anyone enough to want their happiness over my own. Hell, I can’t imagine ever feeling that way.” Lou pours another shot and slides it over to me. “I think you need to be honest with yourself.”

  “She doesn’t like the fact I’m an adrenaline junkie.”

  “Oh, well, I don’t blame her.”

  My eyes snap up to meet his. Neither do I. The night of Juno’s wedding when she told me it would kill her if I died, I understood. “I guess I have to change for her.”

  He shakes his head. “Yeah, that’s not right either. You could end up resenting her.”

  “I wish I could remove it from me like it’s one of the organs you don’t really need, you know?”

  “What?” His forehead wrinkles.

  “My need to do crazy shit, test my boundaries. You know, get rid of it like it was tonsils or a gallbladder I have no use for. I don’t know why I need it, but the thrill I get when I jump out of a plane and into a fire, or race down a mountain—it’s addicting.”

  He blows out a breath. Lou was asked to train as a smoke jumper, but he declined, saying it wasn’t his thing. “Everyone has their reasons to do and not do things. Sometimes those reasons change over time. You’re not there and maybe you never will be. She’ll have to accept that if you two are gonna be together. If she can’t, then I don’t see how it could ever work out between you guys.”

  I nod. The truth is crushing and feels like a weight on my chest.

  I finish my beer, and for the rest of the night, we sit by the bonfire and shoot the shit. Samantha and Tank don’t leave her room, but Stump joins us after he wakes from his nap. I do my best not to think about Stella, but that’s pretty much impossible.

  Allie and Stella don’t return until I’m already in bed. Her laughter rings down the hall. I’m not upset that she’s having fun. Allie’s a good friend to her, and I’m happy that Stella’s happy.

  But early the next morning, I pack my bags, scribble a note to the group, and hightail it back to Lake Starlight. Because Lou’s right—if I don’t change, Stella’s never going to welcome me with open arms. But if I do change, can I really be happy killing off a part of myself? It’s about time I face the fact that there might not be a future for us.

  Midweek, I head to Rome and Harley’s to visit my newest nephew, Linus Jacob Bailey. I’m crossing my fingers we’re calling him LJ or just Jacob because how can they name him after the kid in Peanuts who carried his security blanket around with him?

  I knock and Calista looks out the side window before opening the door.

  “Uncle Kingston!” She smiles at me. “Want to take me to get ice cream?”

  I pat her head. “After I see the new baby.”

  “Ugh.” She rolls her eyes. “Fine. Everyone has to see the baby.”

  I swoop her up and turn her upside down. “Ice cream after. Promise.”

  She giggles and squirms, but I walk into the family room where toys are strewn everywhere and a passed-out Harley is on the couch with her hand inside the bassinet next to her. Little Linus, or LJ or whatever, is asleep inside. I quickly change courses and head to the hallway that veers to the kitchen.

  Phoebe’s twirling in the doorway and smiling at someone at the kitchen table. My guess is Rome. Dion jets down the stairs and Calista’s still wiggling, but I hold her ankles firmly.

  “Dion, here’s your chance for payback. She’s at your mercy,” I say.

  Dion’s eyes light up and he breaks the distance. His fingers tickle his sister’s ribcage.

  “Stop it!” Calista screams, and Rome appears in the doorway, scowling.

  “Okay, yeah, we’re in trouble now.” I lower Calista to the floor, and she runs as far as she can from me. I give Dion a high five.

  “If you wake my wife, I’m going to gut-punch you,” Rome says.

  I hold up my hands. “Sorry.” From what I saw, even a tornado wouldn’t wake her.

  Rome’s wearing an apron which means food, and my stomach growls.

  “What are you cooking?” I ask.

  I step into the kitchen, ready to pat Phoebe on the head, but my hand hangs there when I see who my niece was showing off for. I should’ve known, what with Phoebe’s twirls.

  “Stella?” I can’t keep the question from my voice.

  She turns the coffee cup in her hand. “Hey, I just came by to see the baby.”

  I guess we’re just going to pretend that her running off in tears didn’t happen last weekend.

  “Me too.”

  Dion and Calista chase one another around me, one or both of them grabbing my hands until my arms circle around me.

  “I’m making granola, muffins, and easy breakfast stuff because our mornings are so damn hectic trying to get the other kids fed.”

  “I had gummy worms for breakfast,” Dion says as if he’s six, not four, and just conquered the big roller coaster.

  Rome raises his eyebrows with an expression that says “See?”

  I grab a piece of granola that’s cooling and pop it in my mouth. “It’s good.”

  Rome slides the rest away from me. “Of course it’s good. I made it.”

  Stella laughs, and both of us look her way. “Are there any Bailey boys who don’t have an ego?”

  “No.” Harley walks in with Linus in her arms. She looks like death. Seriously—baggy eyes and her clothes have stains, her hair hangs limply around her face, and she seems paler than normal.

  “You look great,” Stella says and stands from the table.

  Is she looking at the same woman?

  “You’re sweet.”

  Stella holds out her arms and Harley passes the baby to Stella, who looks like a pro with the way she cradles his head and situates him flawlessly in her arms.

  “I’m starving. He eats as much as you.” Harley pokes my side.

  “Your snacks are in the fridge.” Rome kisses her cheek.

  She zombie-walks to the fridge and takes out a container of cubed cheese, chicken, and nuts. At the kitchen table, she falls into a chair with an oomph.

  “You should go upstairs and rest. We got this. I have fresh reinforcements,” Rome says to her, but she waves him off.

  “I had this dream that this guy came in our house and was super loud and got the kids all riled up. Oh, that’s right, it wasn’t a dream.” Harley squares her vision on me.

  I cringe. “Sorry.”

  Stella sits down with Linus and I peek over her shoulder. “He’s a good mix of the two of you, huh?” Stella says.

  “I think he’s all Rome.” Harley sits up to look over at him as if she can’t remember what her son looks like. “Dion is more me and Rome mixed. But this guy is all Bailey, like Phoebe is, if you ask me.”

  “He’s lucky then. Since all the Bailey men are drop dead gorgeous.” I wink at Harley and she rolls her eyes.

  “Ther
e’s that inflated ego again,” Stella says.

  “I say we hand him the baby and see how full of himself he is after that,” Harley says.

  Stella laughs and everyone joins. It’s the best damn sound in the world.

  The room quiets when the three kids run into the family room to watch television. I watch Stella from the other side of the table. She looks good with a baby. I don’t even know if she plans on having kids. She used to, back when we were close, but you never really know until you’re actually old enough to think about these things.

  I want kids and I want them to grow up in Lake Starlight. For a long time, I wasn’t sure about that. The small town, the gossip, but this town built me back up after my life shattered. I hate the memories sometimes and the reminders of what I lost, but it was a good place to grow up. What could be better than being surrounded by the people you love and who love you? I want that for my own children.

  But I don’t want as many as Rome. That’s for damn sure.

  Stella’s eyes catch mine across the table as Harley’s head falls back to the chair and her eyes drift closed. I’d do about anything to know what Stella’s thinking right now.

  “Do you want to hold your nephew?” She stands and comes to my side.

  As good as I thought I was with a baby, it turns out, I’m not, because the exchange is all kinds of awkward and my hand ends up grazing her boob. She probably thinks I did that on purpose.

  A loud crash comes from the family room and Rome heads out to investigate. Harley startles but falls back asleep. I stare down at my brother’s fourth baby. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe more is better.

  Stella doesn’t leave my side since my nephew has his hand wrapped around her finger. I feel you, bud, me too. Her perfume lingers around us and her hair tickles my neck. If we were a couple, I’d turn and kiss her right now.

  “Fatherhood looks pretty good on you,” she whispers.

  “Pretty good? I’d rock this job.” Both her eyebrows rise at my cockiness. “I wouldn’t mind a few of these.”

  She smiles and nods. “Me either.”

  I give myself approximately thirty seconds to imagine what a child of Stella’s and my creation might look like. I think we’d make the cutest babies ever. I can envision our bi-racial babies now and I know they’d be drop dead gorgeous.

  “I’m not sure about the name,” I whisper.

  Stella laughs. “It’s pretty unique.”

  She always sugarcoats things. The sound of a phone buzzing ruins the moment, and Stella digs into her purse.

  “Oh… um… it’s Sedona.”

  Rome walks in with a pissed off look on his face. “Sedona’s calling you?”

  She puts the phone to her ear. “Hey, Sedona… Okay. Okay… Calm down. I’m in Lake Starlight. I’ll be right over. Just sit tight and breathe.” She hangs up and looks at me. “Sedona isn’t feeling well. I’m going to go check on her.”

  I look to my right and left for someone to take the baby.

  “I hate to ask this, but did you drive your truck?” Stella swiftly takes the baby from my arms and places him in Rome’s hands.

  “Yeah.”

  “I walked from my mom’s place. Could you drive me?”

  Is she kidding me? “Absolutely.”

  Twenty-One

  Stella

  Kingston speeds through the rural streets to get to downtown. Sedona ended up taking Juno’s old room in his apartment until she can figure out a long-term plan that works for her. He parks outside his apartment and we file out, him unlocking and opening the door for me. When we step inside the apartment, we find Sedona sitting on the couch with a piece of pie on a plate resting on her stomach.

  “Sedona, how are you feeling?” I say, coming to her side.

  Luckily, I’d packed my medical bag to go over to Harley’s. In my experience of working in an emergency room, mothers have a zillion worries about their babies, and I figured Harley and Rome might want me to give the baby a once-over. But Harley’s the only mom I’ve come across who just rolls with it. She’s so chill, I’m envious.

  “It stopped. It was this tightening in my stomach. But I haven’t had it for five minutes, so that’s a good sign, right?” She forks a piece of pie and shoves it into her mouth.

  My gaze falls to a stack of Lard Have Mercy pie boxes near the trash.

  “She’s kind of addicted to the pies,” Kingston whispers.

  “I heard you. And it’s called cravings when you’re pregnant, FYI.” Sedona shoots Kingston a look that could kill.

  “I think I should still check you out.” I walk farther into the apartment and find that it smells like Kingston. Not his cologne—he’s changed that since high school—but his soap maybe. There’s a game console by the television and a sports magazine on the table near the door. The space isn’t really decorated in any specific color scheme. It’s all man here. “Didn’t Juno live here with you for a while?”

  Sedona laughs. “Are you wondering because the apartment screams ‘poor college bachelor’ motif?”

  I glance at Kingston behind me and he rolls his eyes.

  “If I wasn’t about to pop out a baby, I’d do something about it.”

  I sit down next to Sedona, and she hands me her empty plate and lifts her shirt.

  “Sedona!” Kingston shouts.

  “It’s a belly, Kingston. Surely you’ve seen one before.” She shakes her head at him.

  “It’s moving.” He points at her with a mix of awe and agitation on his face. Sure enough, the baby must be shifting.

  Sedona cradles her stomach with her hand. “She keeps doing that as if she doesn’t have enough room.”

  “It’s like in that movie Alien,” Kingston says.

  “Did you just call my baby an alien?” Sedona snips.

  “No.”

  “Okay, you two. Let’s go to your room, Sedona, and I’ll examine you.” I stand and hold my hand out to help her up.

  She slides to the edge of the couch and, with the use of my hand, gets on her feet. We head into the bedroom, and I feel Kingston watching me the entire time. After last weekend, we never did clear up the whole fight and everything. I guess if Sedona doesn’t have to go to the hospital, now’s the time.

  Sedona gets on the bed and I examine her to see if she’s dilated. She’s not due for another few weeks, but you never know. I listen to her stomach, her heart, and search for the baby’s heartbeat even though we just saw her moving.

  When I’m done, I ask, “Are you excited to be having a girl?”

  Sedona puts her shirt back down and slides into her sweatpants before sitting cross-legged on the bed. She looks down at her swollen stomach. “Yeah.”

  “Are you scared?”

  She nods. “A little. I mean, I can’t live with Kingston forever. He’s not going to want a newborn here. I need to figure out a long-term plan, it’s just scary. I always thought I’d be doing this with Jamison, you know?”

  “I’m sure Kingston doesn’t mind. Do you have any idea what you’re going to do?”

  She shakes her head. “I want it to just be us. I want her to know she can depend on me no matter what. That I’m strong enough for both of us and we don’t need him.”

  Her bitter tone is understandable, though I am surprised by the situation she’s in. From what I knew of Jamison back in the day, I never thought he’d be someone who wouldn’t take care of his own. That said, I don’t know what situation led them here.

  “Have you talked to Jamison?”

  She shakes her head.

  “You’re strong, Sedona, but you can be strong and ask for help too.”

  “I know. But we’ll be fine.” She looks up and smiles. “What about you and Kingston? What’s going on?”

  I stand from the bed. “I think you were just having Braxton-Hicks. You’re not dilated, and I’ve been with you for over fifteen minutes and nothing. But keep an eye on them, and if you feel them again, we should probably go to the hospital to get you che
cked. When do you see your doctor?”

  “Friday.”

  “Perfect. Let him know about today though.”

  She nods. “I will. Thanks.”

  “I better go.” I glance back at the door, nervous about the conversation I’m about to have with her brother.

  “So you’re just going to dodge my question?”

  I walk over to the door with my bag. “I’m about to face your question head-on. Mind if I steal your brother away for a little bit?”

  She smiles wide. “He’s all yours. Then again, he’s always been yours.”

  She laughs as I open the door and leave, shutting it behind me.

  Kingston’s on the couch with his feet resting on the coffee table, and he’s flicking through the channels with the remote. “How is she?”

  “False alarm, I think.”

  “That’s good.” His attention remains on the television.

  “Want to go for a walk?”

  Seeming surprised, he looks at me and clicks off the television, his feet falling to the floor. “You want to walk around Lake Starlight with me? Rumors will fly.”

  I nod. “I think it’s about time we have a real conversation. Don’t you?”

  He grabs his jacket that’s hanging off a nearby chair. “After you?”

  After dropping my bag off in Kingston’s truck, we hit the downtown streets of Lake Starlight. Although winter weather is practically here, it’s an unusually warm day, which is why I took advantage of the nice weather and walked the two miles from my mom’s to Rome’s house. Still, I button my jacket tighter and put my mittens on while we walk.

  “I’m sorry about last weekend,” I say. “I never should’ve run out. I know why you did what you did. It was sweet.”

  He side-glances me. “I shouldn’t have hit him. He’s my best friend. I’m the one who needs to apologize. I’m the one who’s acting like a lunatic.”

  “No, you’re not,” I say. “This is weird. It’s all weird.”

  “I’m so fucking happy you’re home, but at the same time, I’m not. I haven’t been myself since you peeled back that hospital curtain.”