by Carrie Elks
For the first time all day, a genuine smile pulled at her lips. She was having a baby. A new life. It wasn’t the way she’d envisioned becoming a mother. And she knew there would be so many obstacles along the way. But she was strong. She had a home and a job and she knew she could take care of this tiny little thing growing inside her.
She’d been alone for two years. She’d learned how to stand on her own two feet. She could run a farm, take care of her in-laws, and manage accounts that teetered ominously between black and red.
If she could do all that alone, then she could do this alone, too.
She took a deep breath and stood, turning to Sarah with that smile still on her face. “You’re right,” she said. “Maybe it’s time to make my own happiness.”
Sarah grinned. “It really is. And if you ever need anything, you know where I am. God welcomes everybody into his home. You don’t have to be perfect, because nobody is. You just have to be ready to love.”
And she was ready to love. Courtney knew that. Maybe that was enough for now.
Chapter Nine
“So how’s it going?” Cam asked Logan as he slid a pint glass of water onto the table in front of his twin. Not needing to keep in peak condition, Logan had bought a beer for himself. It was a rare day when Cam wasn’t playing a game or at practice, and they’d arranged to meet up for a drink near his home.
“It’s good.” Logan lifted the beer to his lips and swallowed a mouthful, lifting his brows at his mirror-image sitting in the chair opposite. Logan missed seeing his brother, but this time of year was crazy for them both. It had been at least a month since they’d last met up. “I saw your game on Sunday. That play you made was amazing.”
Cam shrugged, taking a sip of the water. “The other team was crap. Aunt Gina could have won against them.” He turned to the left as a fan walked up and asked for a selfie, the corner of his lip lifting into a half-grin as the man hunkered down and angled the phone toward them. “Hey,” he said. “Can you do me a favor and post it once we’re gone? I haven’t had a chance to talk to my brother for a while and I’d like to keep it here on the down low.”
“Sure.” The fan nodded rapidly, his face glowing as if Cam had just shared a deep secret with him.
“Thanks, man.” Cam shook his hand, then pulled his attention back to Logan as the man left. “So how’s the restaurant coming along? You got a completion date yet?”
“January twenty-third as long as we pass the inspection.”
“Man, that sucks. I know you were hoping to get it opened before Christmas.”
Logan shrugged. He’d long since come to terms with losing out on the lucrative holiday income. They’d been stuck in the seventh circle of zoning board hell for weeks. “Ah, it gives us more time to make everything perfect. Opening in December would be a nightmare. Half the people we’d want to invite for opening would be busy, and hiring staff at this short notice would be almost impossible.” He swallowed another mouthful of beer. “You think you’ll be around for opening night?”
“I’ll get my PA to check my schedule, but if I can be there I will.” Cam lifted an eyebrow. “Speaking of which, I got an earful from Aunt Gina yesterday about how I never come home for a visit. She thinks I should be more like you.” He shook his head. “Could you stop making me look bad, please?”
“Hey, I haven’t been home for weeks.” Logan lifted his hands up. He hadn’t wanted to go back to Hartson’s Creek at all. Not since he’d headed straight to the airport from Courtney’s cottage early that Sunday morning. Next week would be his first visit to his dad’s in a couple of months. He’d already told Aunt Gina that he couldn’t make it for Thanksgiving itself. His restaurants would be too busy for him not to be on hand to help. But by Friday they would be calm. At least until the holiday rush started up a few days later.
“Yeah, but you’ll be there and I won’t. Which makes me asshole of the year.” Cam sighed. “I asked why they didn’t come up here for Thanksgiving. I’d get you all tickets to the game.”
Logan laughed. “I can’t imagine Aunt Gina having Thanksgiving anywhere but Hartson’s Creek.”
“That’s exactly what she said.” Cam sighed. “Apparently, I’m also trying to destroy family tradition.”
“If it makes you feel any better, I can’t fly in until Friday. So I’ll be missing Thanksgiving, too.”
“But you’re going home for the weekend,” Cam pointed out. “Which is gonna make her very happy.” He raised his voice into a falsetto. “I just want all my boys home with me.”
Logan laughed at his pitiful impersonation of their aunt. “I’ll put in a good word for you when I’m there next week,” he promised. His mouth felt dry at the thought of going home. In his head, he knew the likelihood of seeing Courtney was low. The Hartson family was spending most of the weekend at Gray’s house, a family reunion of kinds, though of course Cam wouldn’t be there.
But it didn’t stop him from missing her.
“You think you’ll be going back home more often now that the restaurant’s coming together?” Cam asked him.
Logan’s brows dipped. “No. Why?”
Cam shrugged. “A few months ago it felt like you were there all the time. I started wondering if you were thinking about abandoning me and moving back. I figured you just got too busy recently to make it home.”
Truth was, Logan had been busy. Frantic meetings with the zoning board, daily updates with the construction team, and all those conversations with his accountant, shifting money around to make sure they could pay for the damn thing. He’d welcomed the distraction. Keeping himself occupied meant he didn’t have to think about her. At least not until he collapsed into bed at night and felt that weird ache in his chest which hadn’t left him for nearly two months.
Sexual frustration. That’s all it was. Since he’d left her in bed that morning, he hadn’t been with anybody else. Didn’t have the time even if he wanted to.
But the truth was he hadn’t wanted to. Courtney was just another example of how he messed up relationships. He couldn’t even hold down a casual hook up without ballsing it up.
He’d been an idiot going to cook for her. As soon as he’d heard she was sick, he’d hatched a plan like some kind of overexcited puppy. Cook for her, make her feel safe, then go to Aunt Gina’s to rest.
And that’s what he should have done, because going to bed with her had turned everything upside down. It had felt different when he’d held her, when he’d moved inside her, their eyes trained on each other like neither one of them ever wanted to let go.
It was as though he’d let a piece of him be exposed, only to have it stabbed by a knife over and over again.
He was a complication she didn’t need. When it came to her life, her husband’s family came first. He understood that. That’s how he’d been brought up after all. Family over everything.
Yet, for a moment he’d let himself wonder… And it was the wondering that killed him.
“Earth to Logan.”
He pulled himself out of his thoughts, his eyes meeting Cam’s. “Sorry, man. I was thinking about work.”
“I guess that’s my cue to get another round in. You want another beer?”
Logan ran the tip of his tongue along his lip. “I’ll take a whiskey instead.”
“Hoo boy, you really are in a funk. Okay, one whiskey coming up.” Cam stood and pulled his cap a little lower over his brow. “And as much as I’d like to join you, I’ll stick to the soft stuff. Coach will kill me if I have a hangover tomorrow.”
Whereas there was nobody to kill Logan for a hangover. Nobody that really gave a damn. Not even Paris, with her overabundant energy. He could do what he wanted, when he wanted, and occasionally with who he wanted.
Most of the time he liked that. But right now, it would be nice for somebody to care just a little.
Cam walked to the bar and Logan pulled his phone out to check his messages. Like always, he pulled up her contact and looked at their chat
.
I made it back to Boston. You doing okay? - L
Thanks for taking care of me yesterday. And for being so understanding. I guess this is goodbye, right?- C
She’d sent it the morning he left. And it still felt like a bucket of water across the face.
Yeah, he’d typed. I guess it is.- L
But then he’d deleted it and closed the chat. Because he couldn’t bring himself to say it.
He was about to close it down again when he saw three little dots appear. What the hell? He stared at the screen for a moment, his chest tight. And then a message appeared, making his breath catch in his throat.
Sorry to contact you after all this time, but I was wondering if you’d be visiting home soon? I need to talk to you about something. - C
He glanced up from the phone. Cam was still leaning on the counter, talking to the barman as he poured their drinks.
Just hearing from her after all these weeks made his stomach feel tight. Was there something wrong? Had that cop hurt her? And then that tiny piece of bittersweet hope.
Did she miss him?
I’ll be flying in next Friday. There until Sunday. - L
Cam was paying now, putting his card against the little terminal the barman was holding out.
Can we meet somewhere to talk?- C
You want me to come to yours? - L
He was both intrigued and slightly pissed at her reply.
No. Maybe we can meet at the bench by the creek. The one at the end of Church Road?- C
That was weirdly specific.
Sure. Does 7pm on Friday work?- L
7pm is great. Thanks. - C
There were no more dots. No kisses. No goodbyes. Just an odd sensation in his chest and a whole bunch of questions floating around his head.
He’d be seeing her next week. And wasn’t that a weird fucking thought?
“It’s done,” Courtney said, putting her phone on the battered coffee table in front of her. “We’re meeting next Friday at seven.”
Lainey reached for her hand and squeezed it tight. “How are you feeling about it?”
Courtney blew out a mouthful of air, but her lungs still felt tight. “Nervous, I guess. Scared, even. It’s real now.” She looked up, her lips pressed together. “What if he’s angry or thinks I’m trying to trap him?”
“Honey, he freely entered into sex with you. Half of the responsibility is his. And if he’s an asshole, then you’ll know. And you’ll have done the right thing by telling him.” Lainey gave her a tight smile. “I hate to say it, but you two are going to be connected by this baby forever. Somehow you’re going to have to get along. And I know you will. You’re good people, Court. Everybody loves you. You’re honest, open, and you care a damn lot. If he thinks you’re doing something underhanded then he can go to hell.”
Courtney bit down a smile at her friend’s vehemence. The word forever was bouncing around her brain. This was really happening. She was going to have a baby. A little person that would have a whole lot of relatives in Hartson’s Creek.
The wrong relatives.
She tried to push that thought away, but it refused to move. She hadn’t stopped thinking about Ellis and Mary – not to mention Carl – since she’d gotten home from taking the test. All she could think about was how shocked they’d be. How disappointed in her.
“Oh god. How the hell am I going to tell Ellis and Mary?” she asked Lainey.
“When were you thinking of telling them?” Lainey asked, her expression soft.
“I don’t know.” Courtney pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, trying to think it through. “Maybe I should wait until the first trimester is over. Isn’t that what people do?”
“That’s what some people do, yeah.” Lainey nodded. “I guess you’ll need to see a doctor, right?”
“I will. “ Courtney pulled up a page on her phone. “They run a prenatal clinic every week out of the medical building in town. They have a midwife as well as an obstetrician, which I like the sound of.”
“And if somebody sees you walking into the clinic, how long do you think it’ll take for word to get around?”
Courtney shifted uncomfortably. “About ten nano seconds.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “Oh lord, they’re going to know before I even walk out of the building, aren’t they?”
“The downsides of small town living.” Lainey sighed. “If the gossip doesn’t kill you, waiting for it will.”
“Do you think I should go out of town to find a doctor?” Courtney frowned. “I don’t know what they have in Maple Cross.”
Lainey shrugged. “Do you want to be driving miles for every appointment? Don’t you have to go weekly toward the end of pregnancy? That’s gonna be a heck of a lot of driving when your stomach is as big as a bowling ball.” Her voice lowered. “Maybe you should just tell them before anybody else does.”
Courtney rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hand. “You’re right. I should tell them next weekend.” She gave Lainey a half-smile. “Right after I tell Logan Hartson he’s about to become a daddy.”
Lainey started to laugh, then put her hand over her mouth. “Sorry, it’s just so crazy. Of all the people I know, you’re the last one I thought would be pregnant.”
Lainey was right. This wasn’t like Courtney at all. Yet, since she’d spoken with Sarah Maitland in the town square, it was as though something had changed inside her. Maybe it was acceptance. Or the fact she worked on a farm. Pregnancy and babies were part of the circle of life. It was happening whether she liked it or not.
She could either view this baby as a hindrance or as a little miracle. Something good that came from the darkest moment of her life. Babies were givers of hope, and the hope this little one brought was needed more than most.
She smiled at Lainey. “Well I am. So get used to it.”
Lainey laughed harder. “You’re a momma bear in training. I love it.”
Courtney rubbed her stomach, liking that description. “Well this momma bear is absolutely exhausted. It’s been a hell of a day and I’m on sheep duty in the morning.”
Lainey jumped up, gathering their empty mugs. “In that case, I’ll wash these and leave.”
“I’ll wash them.” Courtney held her hands out.
“Oh no. If you’re momma bear, then I’m the fierce grizzly auntie. And this auntie says you need your beauty sleep. Now go to bed. I’ll lock the door behind me.” She pulled her key ring from her purse. “I still have the key you gave me, remember?”
“I remember.” Courtney had given Lainey the key when she was at her lowest, right after Shaun’s death. Too low to have the energy to open the door for her best friend. “And I’m glad you do.”
Lainey leaned forward to hug her, the mugs clashing together as her arms curled around Courtney’s waist. “Now sleep tight, my friend. I promise everything is going to be all right. And you’re going to be the best mom a little baby could want.”
“Thank you,” Courtney murmured, hugging her back. “This little chick already has the best auntie.”
“I’m so damn excited. I want to tell the world.” Lainey pulled back and made a zipping motion across her lips. “I won’t, of course.” She widened her eyes. “Even if it kills me to keep your secret.”
It was sweet how excited she was. Maybe Logan would feel the same way.
Yeah, and maybe he wouldn’t.
One way or the other, she only had a week to wait until she found out.
Chapter Ten
After picking up his rental car, Logan drove straight to the First Baptist Church, parking in the back lot. The blacktop was cracked, tiny green weeds growing up through the gaps, as though nature was still trying to win out against construction.
He’d messaged Gray earlier that day to say he’d be a little later than planned. His flight got in at five, and it was only an hour’s drive from the airport, but there was no way he wanted to get to his brother’s house then leave right away to meet Courtney.
&nb
sp; Better to meet her first, find out what she wanted to say to him, then go and concentrate on his family. His chest was already tight at the thought of seeing her.
As he climbed out of the sleek black rental, the cool Virginia air wrapped around him like a lover. He’d gone to the airport straight from work, but the collar of his light blue shirt was unbuttoned, the sleeves pushed up to below his elbows.
Reaching into the car, he grabbed his jacket from the hook, shrugging it on. There was a breeze in the air, ruffling his short, dark hair, but apart from that it was one of those temperate fall days, where the sun hadn’t quite accepted that winter was on its way.
It would be soon, though. There were storms predicted for next week, with possible snowfall. He should be safely back in Boston by then, thank god.
Logan walked down the narrow track that led to the creek. Surrounded by trees and overgrown hedges on both sides, it opened up at the end to a wide expanse of grass, the water edged with a concrete path that allowed exercisers and leisure seekers to walk alongside the creek for a mile or two. A little further down were the long green lawns of the oldest houses in town. In the spring and summer, that’s where the townsfolk would meet every Friday night with coolers of sweet tea and home made lemonade, the adults sitting and gossiping while the children played flag football or dangled their spindly legs into the creek.
They called it Chairs, mostly because along with their refreshments, everybody brought their own chair to sit and talk. As the center of Hartson’s Creek gossip, he couldn’t help but feel glad that this Friday night happened to fall at the end of November, when nobody would be there.
Turning the corner, his eyes landed on Courtney, and his heart immediately gave a little lurch. She was sitting on the bench overlooking the creek, her dark brown curls tumbling over her shoulders.
He stepped on a twig, and her head whipped as the crackling sound broke through the silence. Her blue eyes met his, and his mouth turned dry. Seeing her in real life reminded him just how little his memories did her justice. He scanned her face, still wondering why she’d asked him to meet.