by Michael Dahl
What's So Funny
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Wade.
Wade who?
Wade up, I've got more knock-knock jokes!
Open the Door
Complete each of these seven knock-knock jokes by writing the name of one of the objects on this page into the blank spaces provided.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Don't chew.
Don't chew who?
Don't chew know?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Monroe.
Monroe who?
Monroe your boat!
TRY THIS
Make a Five-Headed Puppet
Spread your hand out on a piece of paper. Trace your hand and fingers onto the paper with a pencil. Glue some yarn on the tip of each finger tracing so it looks like hair. Then paste googly eyes on each of the five heads. Draw noses and mouths with crayons or colored pencils. Then cut out the whole hand tracing. Glue a Popsicle stick to the back of the paper hand and put on a puppet show.
Words to Know
Absurd: Completely ridiculous or silly. For example, it is absurd to think that there is a man living on the moon.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Glitter.
Glitter who?
Glitter bug!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Weirdo.
Weirdo who?
Weirdo you think you're going?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Island.
Island who?
Island on the house with my parachute!
KNOCK 'EM DEAD WITH KNOCK-KNOCKS
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Adair.
Adair who?
'Ad-air once, but now I'm bald!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Heaven.
Heaven who?
Heaven you heard enough knock-knock jokes?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Candace.
Candace who?
Candace be true?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Habit.
Habit who?
Habit your way, I'll have it mine!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Freeman.
Freeman who?
Free-man from his chains!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Pecan.
Pecan who?
Pecan somebody else!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Band.
Band who?
Band from going there!
What's am I?
I look like a fish and I live in water. But I'm not really a fish. I'm a mammal. I'm incredibly smart and I always have a smile on my face. Sometimes you'll see me doing tricks at the aquarium. What am I?
A dolphin
TRY THIS
Taste Tests
Have you ever noticed that when you have a cold, you have less of an appetite? This is partly because we need our sense of smell to enjoy our food. With the help of a grownup, cut up a bunch of different vegetables, fruits, and cheeses with similar textures. One of you can be the taster, and the other will be the server. The server tells the taster to close his eyes and hold his nose. Then the server places a piece of food in the taster's mouth. The taster has to guess what the food is without using his sense of sight or smell. How easy do you think it will be to guess what you're eating?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Fran.
Fran who?
Fran of mine is coming to town!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Unit.
Unit who?
Unit me a sweater!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Hugh.
Hugh who?
Hugh must have been a star!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Klaus.
Klaus who?
Klaus the window!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Amoeba.
Amoeba who?
Amoeba wrong, but I may be right!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Chicken.
Chicken who?
Chicken to see if you're okay!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Renata.
Renata who?
Renata jokes, I'll have to learn some more!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Chess.
Chess who?
Chess the way it is!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Mia.
Mia who?
Mia pants are on fire!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Yuri.
Yuri who?
Yuri great pal!
Come and Get It!
Your mom is cooking dinner when, suddenly …
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Gus.
Gus who?
To find the end of this mystery, start at the letter marked with a dot. As you spiral into the center, collect every other letter. Write them in order on the lines. When you reach the middle, head back out again, collecting all the letters that you skipped over the first time.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Pasta.
Pasta who?
Pasta potatoes please!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Pasture.
Pasture who?
Pasture bedtime!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Stu.
Stu who?
Stu you want to tell me something?
FUN FACT
HOT AND COLD
The Sahara Desert is the largest desert in the world. It gets so hot there during the day, it is almost impossible to go more than four hours without water. At night, though, it can get so cold, the temperature may drop below freezing!
What's So Funny
Knock knock!
Who's there?
May.
May who?
Mayday Mayday!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Dwight.
Dwight who?
Dwight way is the best way!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Colin.
Colin who?
Colin all kids!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Alpaca.
Alpaca who?
Alpaca the suitcase before we go!
Words to Know
Skit: A short and funny play. A class might write a skit for a school performance. Sometimes a show will be made up of a few different skits.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Sweden.
Sweden who?
Sweden sour chicken!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Hammond.
Hammond who?
Hammond eggs make a good breakfast!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Canoe.
Canoe who?
Canoe tell me a story?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Lana.
Lana who?
Lana the free, home of the brave!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Nanny.
Nanny who?
Nanny one home?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Waddle.
Waddle who?
Waddle you give me for my birthday?
FUN FACT
ARACHNO-WHAT?
We Deliver!
It's fun to order takeout food and have it delivered. But it's even more fun if the delivery person has a yummy name! Choose from the middle initials and last names scattered down the right side of this page. Write them on the correct lines to create seven deliciously different delivery people who might come knock-knocking at your door to bring dinner!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Lionel.
Lionel who?
Lionel get you nowhere!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Rich.
Rich who?
Rich man is a poor man with money!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Orson.
Orson who?
'Orson carriage!
What's am I?
I'm fast as can be, and built for speed. I've got huge claws, and my nest is grand. I live in high cliffs, in canyon walls, and even on city skyscrapers. What am I?
A falcon
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes the police, open the door!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Spider.
Spider who?
I spider hiding in the yard!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Aspen.
Aspen who?
A-spen around until I get dizzy!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Holly.
Holly who?
Holly days are fun!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Pest.
Pest who?
Pest wishes to you!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
April.
April who?
April showers bring May flowers!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Bach.
Bach who?
Bach to the future!
TRY THIS
Make a Rainbow
On a sunny day, get the garden hose and then stand with your back to the sun. Adjust the hose nozzle so it just lightly mists water. Hold the hose up in front of you, and then look closely. You will see a rainbow in the mist.
What's So Funny
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Ivan.
Ivan who?
Ivan extra few minutes for some more jokes!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Heart.
Heart who?
Heart it through the grapevine!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Telly.
Telly who?
Telly your brother to come home!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Raisin.
Raisin who?
Raisin our hands before we speak!
Funny Friends
We've hidden the first half of fifteen knock-knock names in the grid. Look carefully as you highlight each name, and you'll find each person's last name, too. One is done for you! HINT: Middle initials are sometimes included. EXTRA FUN: Turn each name into a knock-knock joke!
LUKE
PAT
IMA
ELA
M. GLADYS
HANK
ALBIE
BABE
MAURA
TOM
MATT
LEWIS
TIM
WANDA
ABBY
Words to Know
Parody: A play, sometimes a musical, that is meant to be very funny and often makes fun of something.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Summer.
Summer who?
Summer time and the living is good!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Quiche.
Quiche who?
Quiche me, I love you!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Hiram.
Hiram who?
Hiram your best friend, don't you remember me?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Hacienda.
Hacienda who?
Hacienda the story!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Whoville.
Whoville who?
Whoville answer the door ven I knock?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Dale.
Dale who?
Dale come if you invite them!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Root.
Root who?
Root for me at the game!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Phyllis.
Phyllis who?
Phyllis in on the details!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Meter.
Meter who?
Meter in the lobby!
TRY THIS
Learn to See Around Corners!
Find a ruler, some tape, and a small mirror. Carefully tape the mirror to the ruler, making sure not to cover up the mirror with the tape. Stand to one side of a door and hold the ruler outside the doorway, so that the mirror is at the farther end. If you move the mirror around, you will be able to see different things in the room through the mirror!
Words to Know
Guffaw: A loud burst of uncontrollable laughter. If you're watching a movie that has many funny things happening, you might not be able to control your laughter. That's when you are likely to guffaw!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Carrie.
Carrie who?
Carrie me home, I'm tired!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Rhoda.
Rhoda who?
Rhoda donkey at the zoo!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Rozette.
Rozette who?
Rozette a bug, now she feels sick!
KNOCK-KNOCK YOURSELF SILLY
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you too!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Lima bean.
Lima bean who?
Lima bean working on the railroad!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Dee.
Dee who?
Dee-licious!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Lisbon.
Lisbon who?
Lisbon to the movies twice this week!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Cher.
Cher who?
Cher would be nice to see you again!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Hive.
Hive who?
Hive got my eye on you!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Stuart.
Stuart who?
Stuart up and serve it while it's hot!
FUN FACT
PENGUIN PAIRS
Male and female penguins have a very interesting way of courting each other. If a male penguin is interested in a female penguin, he may offer her small pebbles as a gift. If she accepts, he knows he has won her heart.
What's am I?
I can be found in marshes, swamps, lakes, and ponds. I am famous in the South. I can grow up to 13 feet long, and as an adult I may weigh up to 500 pounds. I catch my food by clamping my jaws shut over them. What am I?
An alligator
/> Knock knock!
Who's there?
Isaac.
Isaac who?
Isaac-ly who you think it is!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Vine.
Vine who?
Vine-derful news!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Roxanne.
Roxanne who?
Roxanne sand are at the beach!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Anita.
Anita who?
Anita good rest!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Tonto.
Tonto who?
Tonto get ready for school!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Chair.
Chair who?
Chair your secrets with me!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Cedar.
Cedar who?
Cedar plane flying in the air!
Ho, Ho, Ho
The answer to this joke is missing the letters a, e, i, o, and u. Can you fit them in the proper blanks?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Grant.
Grant who?
Grant me a wish!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Babbit.
Babbit who?
Babbit in the garden ate our lettuce!
TRY THIS
Yesterday and Today
Collect some old photos of grandparents or other older relatives. Now get some pictures of you and your friends. Put the new photos next to the old photos to see how different things are today. What kind of clothes did the people in the old photos wear? Are there other differences you can detect?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Luke.
Luke who?
Luke through the peephole and you'll see!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Sole.
Sole who?
'Sole new day!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Iguana.
Iguana who?
Iguana tell you something!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Diploma.
Diploma who?
Diploma is coming to fix the pipes!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Fruit.
Fruit who?