Fraternizing

by C. C. Brown

  "Good morning, Cassie," Angelica said with too much sweetness. Her eyes thinned into snake-like slits. I knew she was up to no good.

  "Good morning, Angelica," I dryly replied. I found no reason to be fake and put on a show with her. I didn't like her, and she knew it.

  "Are you done in the bathroom? I need to shower after that intense kickboxing session this morning."

  She studied my face, almost as if she were looking for a response from me, but I kept my cool and didn’t give her one. If I had learned anything from my very short time in the Corps, it was how to grow a thick skin when it came to petty bitches.

  I brushed past her, moving over to my side of the room without responding to her unwanted information. There wasn't anything that could come out of her mouth that I needed nor wanted to hear.

  "You know Sgt. Castillo and Sgt. Cruz have something, right?" Her voice elevated the further into the bathroom she walked. The sound of her footsteps stopped, right along with my breath.

  She poked her head out of the bathroom, prompting me to turn to my wall locker and gather the things out of it that I needed. She didn't deserve a reaction from me, and I had no reason to give her one.

  "Go ahead and play high and mighty, Cassie, but your boy Cruz is a manipulator. I overheard her talking about it. They all went out to celebrate last night, and he fucked her in her Jeep." She paused, stepping further out and staring at me.

  I could feel the intensity of her gaze, burning into me like solar flares. What the hell was she up to? There was nothing for me to be mad and upset about if two Marines found each other attractive and acted on it. Alex and I were not an item, and if he wanted to dig into the trash for his next fuck, then so be it.

  Only, I couldn’t make myself believe that.

  Of course, I had a reason to be upset. Couple or not, he was fucking wrong if this were true. But I had to consider the source. Ever since Alex went for me at Coyotes, Angelica had turned into a first class bitch, and seeing me suffer seemed to be all that she was after.

  I laughed her off.

  "Well, that's nice. I hope it was good." The words were like deep cuts, slicing their way through me. It hurt saying that shit, even if it was just a front.

  "Okay, Cassie. We both know you and Cruz had something going on. The fact that he would fuck another chick in our immediate circle says a lot about him."

  "You know, Angelica, you have too much time on your hands. You've been trying to stick it to me ever since that night at Coyotes. It was a dance, that's it. But, I can't help but wonder if all of this is just your childish way of screaming that you're pissed you didn't get picked."

  Her eyes lost their gleam, instead rocketing daggers at me.

  "I guess I should warn your new buddy, Castillo that she better watch out. You don’t play nice when you don't get what you want, and it's obvious that Sgt. Cruz is what you want."

  Her mouth tightened as her chest heaved furiously. I had hit a nerve, but it was only fitting because she had hit one with me. I hated that she could get under my skin with something that shouldn't have mattered, and probably wasn't even true, but she had. And in order to make her back the hell up, I had to go for the jugular.

  And it felt good.

  She turned around and walked back into the bathroom, slamming the door with all her might. A small victory had been won, but I was sure that a larger battle was lurking ahead.

  About fifteen minutes later, Dalton came knocking on my door. His blond hair neatly styled, while mine was thrown into a damp ponytail.

  "You ready?" he cheerfully asked, stepping into the doorway and holding the door open for me.

  "Hell yes. Get me out of here."

  "What happened?"

  "Do you even need to ask?"

  I stepped out of the room and waited as he shut the door.

  We walked to the chow hall with minimal conversation. Dalton would comment on the weather, the passing birds, or even the cars in the parking lot-- anything to keep from walking in utter silence. I answered, trying to be polite, but I couldn't carry on the conversation. I was boiling—angry at so many people and unable to figure any sort of way of dealing with it.

  We walked in and grabbed our food, then sat down at the first available table. I played with my food while my mind darted back to Alex, Angelica, and Castillo.

  "Earth to Cassie." He waved his hand in front of me, breaking me from my daydream.

  "Cassie? You never call me that."

  "Well, I had to get your attention somehow. And anyway, I like your first name better. What the heck is going on with you? And don't tell me nothing because I'm no idiot."

  I exhaled a deep breath. I did not want to go into the ins and outs of everything that was irking me. I didn't want Dalton to know what I had been up to. I didn’t want him looking at me differently.

  "I'm just sick of Angelica and her petty shit, that's all. I keep thinking about how much longer I have to live with her, and it's starting to really bother me."

  "Well, you could always ask for a different room assignment."

  "And cave to that bitch? I don't think so."

  He smiled and lightly shook his head. My answer seemed to placate him, and that was all I really needed. I wasn't about to delve into my transgressions in a military chow hall where ears were as wide as the days were long.

  I picked over my food, eating very little before I was ready to head back to my room and dig back into my study manual. Dalton put me on his back and ran us all the way back, finally giving me a reason to laugh. I hadn't joyously laughed in what felt like forever. Not since Alex had hastily checked out. When we got back to the room, Angelica was gone.

  Thankfully.

  Dalton followed me in, plopping down on my bed as I grabbed my manual and sat down next to him. His eyes bore into me, but I kept my head down, trying to ignore the fact that I knew so much more was coming.

  "Cassie, talk to me."

  I didn't look up from my manual. Instead, I turned the page and tried to focus even harder.

  "I can only imagine you hate living with Angelica, but that's not the end of it. And I wasn't going to push you to talk in a crowded chow hall, but now it's us. Talk to me." His voice was a soft plea, and it cut down to my bones.

  I felt awful for leaving him in the dark, especially since he had dug into his closet and shared deeply personal information. I’d never had a shoulder to lean on, a confidant, a real friend. I looked at him and found nothing but compassion in his eyes. The longer he looked at me, the weaker I became.

  "You haven't been yourself all week. I've been worried, but I didn't want to push you."

  "I've been fine. Have you seen me crying?"

  "People don't have to cry to show their hurt, Cassie. What's going on with you?"

  I stood. Walking to the bathroom, I internally debated telling him or not. Before I could come to a conclusion, he spoke again, this time jolting me back into reality.

  "This has something to do with Sgt. Cruz, doesn't it?"

  Prickles shot up all over my arms as the hair on the nape of my neck stood at attention. I didn’t want to turn around and face him, but standing there like a statue was just as incriminating, so I finally turned and looked into his eyes.

  "What makes you say that?" I meekly asked, hoping to fend him off.

  "Well, by your reaction, I would say I'm right. And anyway, we're friends. I've gotten to know you well since combat training, and I can read you. I'm pretty good at that, you know."

  The smile he gave, and the sincerity in his eyes, cracked me. I couldn’t stand to lie to him any longer, or omit anything that I knew was already true.

  "Yes. This has to do with Cruz," I finally said, feeling the weight of the world leave my shoulders with every word.

  He patted my bed, scooting over and making room for me to sit down.

  "What happened?"

  I filled him in on everything. From the night we met at Coyotes, to the formation, clear up until Alex's sud
den mood change. The information had been stored in me like a stuffed box, ready to burst. I never thought I’d be so relieved to tell someone about what was going on between me and my instructor, but I was, and Dalton was supportive. He pulled me into a hug, holding me close while he rested his chin on the top of my head.

  "You poor thing. Why didn't you tell me? I can't even imagine having to walk around holding all of that in."

  "I was scared. We can lose so much if this gets out."

  "I know that, but seriously, you have to have an outlet."

  I pulled away from him, wanting to look into the only friendly face in my life at the moment.

  "So what happened with Angelica this morning? Because between making breakfast plans and meeting up, you were different, and not in a good way."

  "I guess I'm not the hard ass I think I am, huh?"

  "Nope."

  I scooted back on my bed, crossing me legs Indian style while facing him.

  "Well, Alex hasn't spoken to me in over a week. Okay, whatever. But I saw Angelica in the parking lot with Sgt. Castillo this morning, and when she came back up here she was telling me that all of the instructors went out last night to celebrate Alex's NCO of the Quarter award--"

  He laughed.

  "Can I just say it's super weird for me to hear him being referred to as Alex? That's all. Go on."

  I smiled at him, realizing that it was probably a little weird since we typically went by rank and last name.

  "Sorry. Anyway, she let me know that according to Sgt. Castillo, she and Sgt. Cruz," I emphasized his name, "fucked in her Jeep last night."

  "What the hell? Do you believe her?"

  "I don’t want to. Angelica and Castillo have nothing but hate for me. I wouldn't put it past them to come up with some shit to try and catch me...or break me."

  "Hmmm. Well, I think you should just be forth coming and ask him."

  "He won't respond to me. And I don’t really think I should. We aren’t together. We've never been a couple, so what's the point? If he wants to fuck everything walking, that's his right."

  "But what about you? I know you're looking at it as just fucking, but from everything you've just told me, I think it’s a little more than that."

  He had me.

  He had me pegged, and I absolutely hated it.

  "Look. I saw you happy, probably the happiest I have ever seen you while your little cat and mouse game was going on, but now you’re the lowest I've ever seen you. So, I think you owe it to yourself to at least try and find your footing where he's concerned."

  "I'm not chasing anyone."

  "No one said chase. But you should definitely ask. At least put the rumor to rest."

  "I've tried contacting him. He won't respond. There's nothing else I can do."

  "I bet if you were blunt with it, he'd respond."

  His words blared out like a neon sign. Of course being direct would back him into a corner, and I’d seen Alex backed into a corner. He got aggressive. But if I was going to put my mind at ease, I had to do it.

  "You're right. Hand me my phone please."

  I took my phone from Dalton and typed out a text to Alex.

  Chapter 17

  Alex

  Cassie: You ditched me and started something up with Castillo? Way to not fuck and run, Alex.

  Her text woke me out of my drunken stupor. Last night had been an awful idea.

  Fuck!

  And now, somehow Cassie knew about, or at least she’d heard about what happened between me and Castillo. The only person who could have told her would have been Castillo herself, and it infuriated me. I didn't want her anywhere near Cassie, and I certainly didn't want her throwing that fucking mistake in her face.

  I read the text message a few times, thinking about how their interaction must have gone, and grew more and more angry by the second. Of all the people to be completely and utterly stupid with, why the fuck did I have to do it with Castillo? Why did I have to be stupid in the first place?

  My heart was racing with every thought. I knew I still wanted Cassie, but how could I have her and keep my standing in the Marine Corps? Even after she graduated, people would look at the situation funny, knowing I had met her through school. The way I would be perceived in the eyes of my brothers mattered to me; it mattered a hell of a lot. On the other hand, I couldn't remember ever feeling so strongly for someone. Cassie had a way with me. She got me to crawl down off my high horse, shed the rough exterior, and be normal.

  I hadn't been normal since I'd raised my hand and swore to protect my country. My life had been run by rules, regulations, and consequences. I couldn't and didn’t care to see beyond them.

  Until now.

  Now, I wanted to question things, but I wasn't sure how, and faced with uncertainty, the best fall back were those rules and regulations that had never led me astray.

  I glared at the text again, trying to make myself respond, but afraid of falling back under her sweet and enticing spell. Instead, I hit the call button for Castillo. She answered on the third ring.

  "Hello," she said. The noise in the background indicated that she was driving.

  "What the fuck did you say to Pfc. Bennett?"

  "Wow, Alex. You make me look like a whore last night, and now you're calling me over your little play thing. You're amazing."

  "Leti, I'm only going to ask you one more time what the fuck you said to her before I completely lose my shit on you."

  She breathed hard, exhaling deeply into the phone.

  "I haven't said shit to your little girlfriend. But thanks for letting me know I've been right all along."

  "You fucking listen to me. You have nothing to fucking say to her. You don't even have a fucking reason to look at her. You work in admin, and unless she has a reason to see you, you stay the fuck away from her. You understand that?"

  My breaths blew out of my nose like a raging bull. Then it dawned on me that I didn't counter her when she blurted out that Cassie was my girlfriend and that she'd been right about it. The thought temporarily seized me, making me think long and hard about the way my subconscious was responding where my controlled thoughts were thinking differently.

  "Alex, how far you have fallen. A student?"

  "You've been a manipulative bitch since the days of Evelyn. You go any further with this, and I'll have your ass taken down, Leti. I promise you that. Back. The. Fuck. Up."

  I hung up the phone and threw it against the wall. Luckily, in my blind rage, the cover took the brunt of the impact, cracking and falling to the ground. Riley came rushing into my room.

  "Get the fuck out, Riley."

  "What happened?"

  I turned and glowered at him. He didn’t relent, instead moving further into the room.

  "You're fucking losing it, Alex. What is going on with you?"

  "Where have you been this morning?" I asked, working furiously to catch my breath.

  "What?"

  "Where the fuck have you been?"

  "I went on base to wash and detail my truck before the sun ruined that for me."

  "So you were on base?" That revelation plastered suspicion all over me. In my furor, I couldn't see anything for what it was.

  Had Riley spoken to Cassie and spilled the beans as a way to punish me? I couldn't be sure of anyone or anything anymore. The alcohol still coursing through my veins was contributing to my irrational thoughts, fueling the anger. I grabbed him by his shirt collar with both hands and lifted him, slamming him against the wall.

  "Look shithead. I fucked up last night. I admit that. But you going to Cassie and telling her is going to get your ass beat."

  He powered up and worked his way out of my grip.

  "Get your shit together, Alex. I didn't go over to the barracks at all. I didn’t even see Cassie this morning."

  I was breathing erratically, feeling the haze of my hangover looming over my head.

  "Where the fuck is Jensen?"

  I heard the door swing open a l
ittle wider, Jensen standing the frame.

  "I'm right here. And what the hell does Bennett have to do with any of this?" Disapproval filled his face as he looked me over, his mouth forming into a tight scowl. "You went on and fucked her, didn’t you?”

  “That’s none of your business, Jensen. Stay in your fucking place!” My teeth clenched as did my fists as I yelled out the last part, my frustrations seemingly taking over my body.