Beyond Reckless

by Autumn Jones Lake

  “And I’m an asshole.”

  “Sometimes,” he agrees. He circles a finger in the air, indicating the clubhouse. “We all are sometimes. It’s how you fix your mistakes and learn from them that matters.”

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  “Your uncle wants to see you, Char. You haven’t been over there in forever.”

  Yeah, no thanks.

  My mother interprets my silence correctly. “It’s his birthday. You have to go. We’ll all go together,” she insists.

  “Uh, I have plans.”

  “Charlotte!” My mother can be as demanding and whiny as a child when she wants her way. “Your uncle put you through that fancy-ass law school. The least you can do is spend five minutes at his birthday party.”

  Birthday party my ass.

  Drunken orgy is more like it.

  Put me through law school is also a stretch.

  He paid for my first year, and in addition to my massive student loan payments, uncle dearest also receives a check from me every month. Because fuck him and fuck owing him anything.

  That fucker cashes every check too.

  “Ma, you know why—”

  “Oh, for fuck’s sake, Charlotte. It’s been years. Get over it.”

  Her words are a painful punch in the gut. She’s never been there for me. Never taken my side in anything.

  I’m almost thirty frickin’ years old. Why do I still care?

  “I’ll go with you, sis,” Carter says from behind me. I turn and find him glaring at our mother. “I’ll make sure no one bothers you.”

  Thank God for Carter. There’s no way I’d set foot in that place again by myself.

  Mom’s lips curl into a sneer. “You’re just gonna piss Chuck off, but whatever, Carter. You think your sister needs a babysitter, by all means. Just make sure you get your ass to that party.”

  “Wait, aren’t you coming?” I mean if it’s a family event and she’s forcing me to go, why isn’t she going?

  “I’ll swing by later.”

  Meaning, she’ll get shitfaced and pass out. Fantastic.

  “I need to run home and change.”

  My mother runs her gaze over me in one quick and dismissive movement. “Something less nerdy would be good.”

  “God forbid I don’t run around with my tits hanging out,” I grumble.

  Carter chuckles and takes my arm. “I have a T-shirt you can borrow.” He leads me down to his room and closes the door.

  “You really need to get your own place.”

  “I know,” he says quietly as he plows through his dresser drawers. “I’m just worried if no one’s here she’ll drown in her own puke or something one night.”

  “Jesus, Carter. That’s her problem. Not yours. I have room. Come stay with me.”

  His mouth quirks to the side. “I think that would be awkward for both of us.”

  “More awkward than bringing girls home for the drunken inquisition?”

  He snorts softly. “There haven’t been any girls to worry about lately.”

  “Well, maybe Uncle Chucky can hook you up tonight.”

  He throws a disgusted glare at me. “No thanks.”

  Damn do I love my little brother. He towers over me by quite a bit these days, but he’ll always be my little brother. Even if he thinks it’s his job to be my protector.

  “We’ll take my car. Let me know when you’re ready to go,” he says.

  “What if you want to stick around?”

  He tosses that glare at me again.

  “No, seriously. What if you want to hook up?”

  “Sis, I love you, but it’s really creeping me out that you’re so damned worried about my dick right now.”

  “Fuck you, you little shit.”

  “You talk like that when you go to court?”

  “All the time.”

  As soon as we’re in my brother’s car, I’m praying the old clunker breaks down. Is that too much to ask for?

  “Should we bring him something?” I ask Carter.

  “Fuck him.”

  I could’ve predicted that answer. I’m inclined to agree, but I don’t feel like being bitched out by mother later if she deems we weren’t respectful.

  “Come on, stop at the liquor store, I’ll at least bring a bottle of something he likes.”

  “Whatever. Like his place isn’t stocked.”

  He swings into the parking lot and waits in the car.

  When I return, Carter inspects my purchase with a bland expression. “Whatever. Just don’t drink anything there.”

  “No kidding.” I pull the bottle of seltzer I brought out of my bag. “Why do you think I brought my own.”

  “I hate this,” he grumbles, pulling out of the parking lot. “Let’s get it over with. I can’t believe mom bitched at us about going and then isn’t even here.”

  “We’ll go, pay our respects. Sing happy birthday, grab some cake and get the fuck out.”

  He holds out his fist and I tap my own against it. “Deal.”

  The parking lot’s packed when we arrive.

  “Fuck,” Carter mumbles.

  “Park out there, so we don’t get boxed in,” I direct.

  “You got it.”

  He finds a spot suitable for his baby. Once he shuts the car off, he leans over and flicks the glove box open, pulling out a small revolver.

  “Carter, are you nuts?”

  “I’m not messing around, sis.” He flashes a cheeky grin at me. “It’s not loaded.”

  “You’re an idiot. You pull that on someone, you’re going to get your ass kicked or worse.”

  He rolls his eyes. “Come on, you know Uncle Chuck expects everyone to carry.”

  “Uncle Chuck is also a lunatic,” I point out. “Apparently it runs in the family,” I mutter as he gets out of the car.

  “I heard that!” he yells, making me laugh.

  My family is insane.

  Of course before we leave, Wrath wants all of us to meet up in the front yard. I’m extra antsy because Heidi’s still joining us tonight. It’s awkward for a lot of reasons.

  “Heidi, they run their club different than ours. You’re going to see some shit,” Wrath warns. “Mouth shut. No judgmental faces.”

  Heidi nods. She’d never mouth off to Wrath and I find his instructions to her fucking hilarious.

  “No one should bother you.” He nods to her property patch. “But stick with your man.” He glances at Trinity. “If we need to discuss business, I want you two to stick together.”

  “No problem,” Trinity says.

  It finally seems to sink in that this might not be the fun party Heidi expected. She gives Murphy an uncertain look and he squeezes her hip in response.

  Wrath nods at me. “I assume you’ll be watching over Heidi, so stick with them.” His gaze moves to Ravage. “Eyes on Trinity.”

  “You got it.”

  As newer patched members, Hoot and Birch still get a lot of shit work. Wrath tasks them with keeping an eye on the girls. They don’t get to tap ass tonight. I almost wish I could trade with them.

  Before everyone moves to the garage, I take Heidi aside.

  “Hey, you all right?”

  She gives me an uncertain look that kills me. It’s not nerves from going to this party. It’s hurt. She flicks her gaze to Murphy and gives me a half-smile. “I am a little nervous.”

  I attempt a teasing tone. “Why? You used to beg to go to these kinds of things and see what we were up to.”

  “Yeah, now I’m afraid to find out.”

  “You’ll be fine.” I nod to her property patch. “You’re Murphy’s ol’ lady, anyone fucks with you, they die.”

  She thumps her hand against her chest. “That’s so comforting.”

  I hook an arm around her and kiss the top of her head. “That’s the spirit.”

  Murphy gives me a fist-bump before they leave.

  Wrath stops me from following with a hand to the chest. “You good?”

  �
��I’m fine. Kind of wish Rock was going.”

  “Me too.”

  He glances at the others and in a lower voice informs me, “I need to have a talk with Whisper. Need to find out where he stands on the rebuild of Furious.”

  Surprised he’s sharing information with me about the gym, I answer with the only thing I can think of. “Is it gonna get ugly?”

  “It shouldn’t.” He gestures toward my truck. “Riding or driving?”

  “Fuck, you know I still can’t ride.”

  He runs his gaze over me quickly before meeting my eyes again. “You’re gonna ride again, brother. You’ve come a long way in a short amount of time. This’ll be good for you.”

  “Why? You don’t seem too thrilled.”

  “That’s because I’m old and anti-social.” He pats my cheek and flashes a wide grin. “You’re still a pretty party boy.”

  If he didn’t have so much seniority over me in the club and I didn’t love him like a big brother, I’d probably punch him. “Startin’ to feel like an old man.”

  “I hear that. Hey,” he says, cutting his laughter short. “Heidi will be fine. She knows how to handle herself.”

  “We’ll see, won’t we? Besides, she’s Murphy’s problem. Isn’t that what you keep saying?”

  “Gee, and here I thought you weren’t paying attention.”

  CHAPTER NINE

  “Jesus, this is way more than a simple birthday party,” I grumble at Carter as I meet him in front of his car.

  He surveys the parking lot. “You want to leave?”

  “No.” I glance at the brown paper bag in my hand. “Let’s drop this off. I don’t want to listen to Mom’s bitching if we don’t show up.”

  People are scattered throughout the parking lot, which is really more of a backyard with a lot of gravel strewn around. The occasional moan and groan reaches us as we weave through parked cars and motorcycles. Carter stays close behind me.

  My own personal bodyguard.

  I have to be out of my mind to set foot in this place again.

  “You okay, sis?” Carter asks in a low voice, touching my back.

  “I’m fine.”

  A few dark figures are clustered around the back door. I don’t recognize any of them, but the shirt Carter insisted I wear, is enough to get us through the door.

  Throbbing music vibrates through my shoes and a haze of smoke hangs in the air. “Just as I remember,” I mutter. A cold shiver of revulsion works turns my stomach.

  “You sure you’re all right?” Carter asks. “You look green.”

  “Shitty lighting.”

  “There’s my favorite niece!” Uncle Chuck shouts.

  Turning, I peer into one of the rooms on my right. It’s a small office and Chuck’s behind the desk with one of his buddies hanging out on the other side. “Hi, Uncle Chuck. We made it.”

  “Char!” He stands and circles the desk, embracing me in a rib-crushing hug. “So happy you’re here, sweetie.”

  While his words sound nice, his tone, eyes, face, all of it are completely flat, cold, and lifeless. I can’t tell if he’s drunk or his soul slithered out of his body for good.

  Either way, I force a smile on my face and remember to wish him a happy birthday. “We brought this for you.” I hand over the brown bag and his grin widens when he pulls the bottle of whiskey out.

  “That was very nice of ya, Char. Thanks.”

  “Happy birthday, Uncle Chuck,” Carter says in a respectful tone, even though I know he’d be happier telling our uncle to fuck off.

  He barely glances at Carter, giving him a perfunctory nod as if I’d brought some random guy with me instead of his nephew. After circling his desk, he drops into his chair and opens the bottle. “Your momma stopping by, Char?” he asks, pouring the whiskey into a mug.

  “She said she’d be here a little later.”

  “Good. That’s good. She needs to get out of the house more.”

  If by “out of the house” he means “drag her ass to an AA meeting” then yes, she should get out more. I force out a sound of agreement.

  “I worry about her,” he says more seriously.

  “You should stop by more often.” Carter’s voice comes out free of sarcasm, but our uncle still throws a scowl at him.

  Ignoring my brother, Uncle Chuck focuses on me. “She get those repairs done?”

  “As far as I know, yes. Carter really knows more about it since he lives there.”

  “Your guy did good work.” Carter steps up next to me. “Mom tipped him in her own special way.”

  I elbow my brother in the ribs and he backs off.

  “I’ll have a talk with him,” Chuck says, waving his hand in the air. He takes a healthy sip from his chipped mug and nods at the open door. “Got a lot of folks visiting tonight.” His face cracks into a creepy smile and he points at my chest. “Keep your shirt on.”

  The smile tightens on my face. “Will do, Uncle Chuck.”

  “Keeper’s daughter is here. She was looking forward to seeing you,” he adds. If he’s trying to make me feel guilty for avoiding this place for so long, he’s out of luck. Although, I am excited to see my old friend.

  “Great, I’ll go look for her.”

  “Good girl,” he says and I barely stop myself from flipping him off.

  “What’s wrong with you?” I hiss at my brother once we’re out of Chuck’s office. “You probably got the guy who helped Mom out killed.”

  His shoulders lift as his eyes scan the room, giving me the impression he’s not listening. “If he doesn’t want Mom sleeping with every guy who gives her a peek of plumber’s crack, he shoulda claimed her ass years ago.”

  Now there’s a mental image I’ll never be able to scrub from my brain. “Gross. It’s bad enough having him for an uncle. You really want him as a step-father?”

  He pretends to consider the question before shaking his head.

  “Come on,” I urge, dragging him into the room. “Help me find Liberty. She’s the only one in this dump I’m actually excited to see.”

  “Think she turned out as hot as her mom?”

  “You’re twisted.”

  He flashes a grin but doesn’t disagree. His gaze scans the room. “I’ll be in a dark corner watching out for you.”

  “If you weren’t my brother that would be totally creepy.”

  He chuckles. “I always got your back, sis.”

  My anxiety eases for the first time tonight. I glance at my wrist as if I’m wearing a watch and he does the same. “Let’s sync our watches. One hour until departure.”

  He grins at me. “Deal.”

  CHAPTER TEN

  Even if inviting us here was meant to be a friendly gesture, I’m not willing to risk getting shitfaced on a rival club’s turf, so I chose seltzer tonight. Murphy would never risk drinking and riding, so he’s been nursing a Coke.

  Bless my sister, but she seems to be taking her role here seriously. She hasn’t opened her mouth once unless asked something directly.

  Merlin stumbled out of his office and flopped into the chair across from us a few minutes ago. While I’m trying to pay attention to his plans for “restructuring” their Slater County turf, I’m also doing my best to ignore Murphy’s hand up the back of my sister’s shirt. He’s just brushing his thumb over her skin. It’s a casual gesture. Like he has the right to touch her so intimately. Like he does it all the time.

  Which is why it’s so fucking annoying.

  She must sense the impending explosion of my head. Heidi circles her fingers around his wrist and pries his hand off her before turning to me. She doesn’t ask if I’m okay, she knows better in this setting, but her eyes are full of concern. She gave me shit when I explained there was no fucking way I’d bring my cane into this clubhouse tonight.

  Jesus, I love her. And I hate that we brought her here. I never wanted her to be part of this stuff.

  Just because I chose this life doesn’t mean I wanted it for her.

&n
bsp; I’m still rattled from the stuff she admitted to me yesterday. The stuff she screamed at me. I always knew something wasn’t right between her and Axel, but in the back of my head, part of me was also relieved he’d get her away from club life.

  Now that I know how bad things were, fuck that he tried to talk her into an abortion, not once but multiple times?

  Pissed isn’t adequate.

  Even though less than twenty-four hours ago she was spitting mad and screaming at me—rightfully so—she gives me a soft smile. “Do you need a refill?” she asks, nodding at my glass.

  She stands and braces herself on Murphy’s legs, leaning in to kiss him before taking our glasses.

  “How bad did he kick your ass for hooking up with his sister?” Merlin asks, laughing like a moron at his own question.

  A slow smile spreads over Murphy’s face. “Worth it.”

  Merlin opens his mouth, and I sit forward, nailing him with a warning glare. “She’s young to already have patched her, no?” Merlin asks instead of whatever dirty question he was considering.

  Murphy shrugs. Neither of us are going to say she’s been around the club her whole life. No need to give either of them the idea that she’s here as anything other than Murphy’s pretty little lap decoration tonight.

  When she returns, she hands Murphy his glass first, then hands me my seltzer.

  “Come here, sweetheart,” Merlin says. She glances at Murphy and gets a nod before taking a step closer to the Wolf Knights’ prez.

  He reaches out, running his fingers over the patches on the side of her vest.

  The back of the vest announces she’s “Property of Murphy” and the name of our MC. The side holds the smaller patch of each Lost Kings MC officer in our chapter.

  Technically he’s not touching Heidi. His fingers barely graze the patches. Doesn’t matter. Next to me, Murphy coils tight. I set my seltzer down and sit up in case things get ugly.

  Merlin’s fingers stop on the black and blue nautical star patch that indicates Wrath voted Heidi in as an ol’ lady. “You guys take a vote on the old ladies, right? Not do it some other way?”