Hate Me or Love Me

by Ella Miles

  “What do you want, Olive? Tell me,” Sean says.

  “I want your tongue on my nipples again.”

  He sits up, and his lips cover my nipple. His tongue teases me again as it dances between my breasts while his eyes find mine. He makes me moan louder, bringing me closer but not quite there. Sean raises an eyebrow at me, challenging me to keep telling him what I want, to take control. I’m thankful to have some control again, but I know that, as I long as I keep fucking him like this, I’ll never get what I want.

  “Fuck me, and make me come,” I say.

  He grins as he grabs my hips and starts moving me up and down and in a circular motion, much faster and harder than I could on my own. His mouth stays on my tit, and I groan loud, like I’ve never groaned before. So loud that I’m sure the whole building heard me. He doesn’t tell me to come or to quiet my screams. He just gives me one more dirty look and thrusts harder, making me scream and orgasm all over his hard dick.

  It takes me a second to calm my breathing, but when I do, he says, “That was for you. This one is for me…and maybe you.”

  Before I have time to think, he pulls out of me and flips me over face-first onto the bed. His dick enters hard from behind me. I struggle for air as he fucks me hard against the bed. He smacks my ass hard twice. Hard enough that it brings tears to my eyes, but not so hard that I want him to stop. And then he comes hard and fast while screaming out my name before collapsing onto my back. We stay like that, stuck together, both recovering from one of the best fucks of my life.

  Sean slowly gets up and says, “Want to take a shower with me? I’m sure we can find something fun to do in the shower.” He winks at me.

  I roll onto my back, smiling, trying to give myself a few more seconds to recuperate before I say yes to my first time getting fucked in a shower.

  But then Sean’s eyes grow wide as he stares at me, and I’m afraid, now that the sex goggles are gone, he sees something in me that he doesn’t like.

  “What?”

  Sean frowns and seriously looks at me. “Olive, please tell me you weren’t a virgin.”

  I bite my lip to try to keep from laughing because he will be far too fun to play with in this moment. I look down at the two spots of blood staining his white sheets. “It was my first time…” I say.

  “Oh my God, Olive! I can’t believe you tricked me like that. I would never have fucked you if I knew you were a virgin. I don’t do virgins. Far too clingy, and I’m not good with all the emotions and crap…” Sean keeps rambling, but I don’t hear him because I’m dying laughing at him freaking out.

  “It’s not funny, Olive. You need to tell a man before you let him fuck you for the first time.”

  I start laughing so hard that I snort. “You didn’t let me finish,” I say between laughs.

  Sean narrows his eyes. “Of course I let you finish. You came twice if I recall. It’s not my fault you don’t know what an orgasm is yet.”

  I laugh even harder. I finally get up from the bed and shake off the laughs as I put my hand on his hard chest. “It was the first time that a man made me orgasm while having sex. Not my first time having sex. I must just be starting my period or something.”

  I walk past him and into the bathroom, enjoying having the upper hand for once. My jaw falls open again though when I see that the size of his bathroom is larger than my entire apartment. And the shower is big enough to comfortably hold half a dozen people at least.

  I feel Sean behind me.

  “You know, it’s not nice to test people.”

  I grin as I turn and face him. “I’m just learning from the best,” I say with a wink.

  “I’m going to have to punish you for that.”

  I grin even wider. “Good. Because I think I like your punishments.”

  9

  Sean

  I’m running away. I don’t ever run away from anything, but I’m running away from Olive.

  I didn’t expect one night with her to affect me so much, but it did. She is so different from any woman I’ve ever dated before.

  I enjoyed fucking her more than I’d thought I would. I know that she is inexperienced, and inexperienced women aren’t usually my type, but, man, did I love breaking her, showing her what sex could be like with a real man.

  But she can’t get attached. I don’t date women, and I sure as hell don’t fuck the same woman more than once. Because that leads them to thinking that I’m willing to date them, and I’m not. The only woman I’ve ever considered dating again is Jamie. She’s the only person I’ve ever really cared about. I’m not going to let another woman cause me any pain if they don’t even compare to Jamie. I’m not going to put myself in that kind of pain ever again.

  I’ve never met a woman who can compare to Jamie, but Olive and Jamie are so different that it would be hard to compare the two anyway. Jamie is confident, determined. She knows exactly what she wants and how to get it. Olive is a sweet, clumsy mass with very little confidence. But I’m also discovering how beautiful she really is, how strong, how sassy she is when she wants to be. And there’s just something about Olive that I can’t quite understand. She has this quality, and I don’t know if I love her or hate her. She just gets under my skin in a way that no woman, even Jamie, ever has before.

  I look out the window as the private jet takes off from Chicago. I never pay for private jets. They are a waste of my money since I usually just fall asleep on the plane the second that it takes off anyway. I’d rather spend my money on other things—cars, condos, expensive wine and food. But, today, I just need a plane with no one else on it. One that will take me wherever I want, mainly away from Chicago and Olive.

  I need to put some space between me and her now because nothing else is going to happen between us. We had our one night of fun, and now, it’s back to business. And I need Olive to know that because, if she fucks up one time, she’s gone. I’m not giving her any special treatment just because I like fucking her.

  The copilot comes back toward me after we’ve taken off. “Mr. Burrows, it’s a ten-hour flight to San Paolo. Are you sure you’re only going to need three hours after we arrive before wanting to return, sir?”

  “Yes.”

  “Okay, sir. We will have the plane ready to turn around three hours after we land,” the copilot says, closely studying me before heading back to the cockpit.

  He knows better than to question why we’re flying all this way to a place that I don’t even have any business ties to. He doesn’t understand, that’s the point. This weekend isn’t about business or women. This weekend is about getting away and making me forget about Olive even if that means wasting money and spending most of my time in the air, drinking and sleeping.

  I lean my chair back and close my eyes, trying to sleep—something that I didn’t get any of last night because I spent all my time fucking Olive or watching her as she slept, trying my best to understand her. But, the more I tried to understand her, the more intrigued I became with her.

  I try to sleep and think of something else, anything other than Olive, but my brain automatically goes to her. It’s eight o’clock. She’s probably just waking up and finding the note I left her. She’s probably mad, cursing my name because I left her all alone after I fucked her. I hate that I’m hurting her, but it’s better to hurt her now than a year from now, like Owen did.

  And, for once, I need to look out for myself. That’s what I’ve learned after all these years. No one else is going to look out for me, so I have to. And I always put me first. And, right now, what I need is to just be gone.

  10

  Olive

  Sean’s gone.

  I know it without opening my eyes. He thought he was being sneaky this morning when he snuck out of bed, threw on clothes, and then typed a message onto my phone. He thought I was sound asleep. That he had fucked me so hard last night that I wouldn’t even be able to function until hours later.

  But he doesn’t know me at all.

  I
grin. Well, he knows me a little bit. He knows the sound I make when he enters me. He knows the look on my face when I come. He knows every imperfection on my body. He knows exactly how to fuck me. He just doesn’t know me.

  He doesn’t know that I’m used to waking up early. That I hardly ever get any sleep.

  But, when he left early this morning, I acted like I was asleep. I didn’t let him know that I was awake. I’m not going to become a clingy girl who needs him to basically propose to me the morning after. I got what I needed out of him. Sex. And, now, it’s time to forget about Owen.

  Honestly, right now, I appreciate that there will be some distance between us. The distance will help with the awkwardness when I see him at work on Monday.

  I stretch and yawn as I roll over to grab my phone and read the message he left for me.

  “Ow,” I moan as I move. Damn, I’m sore.

  I click on the message and read it.

  I got a call. I need to handle some emergencies that came up at work. Help yourself to any food you can find in the condo. Your training will continue Monday.

  —Sean

  I sigh. He lied to me. He didn’t get a call this morning. He just jumped out of bed like it was on fire, and he couldn’t get out of here fast enough.

  I read through the message several more times, searching for any kind of clue as to what Sean does for a living or how he feels about me. But I find nothing, no matter how many times I read it.

  He gives no clue to what he does for a living, and it’s pretty obvious how he feels about me. He fucked me, and now, he’s done with me. I’m going to be lucky if I even still have a job on Monday. Because I have a feeling that, if I fuck up at work, then I’m done. He doesn’t need the hassle. Plus, if I’m gone, then he can hire a new assistant he can fuck.

  He said I could help myself to his food, but I have a better idea.

  I get out of bed, shivering immediately from the cold air. I wrap my arms around my body and begin searching the floor for my clothes, but I can’t find them. I sigh. Shit. I’m going to have to wear some of his clothes out of here.

  I walk toward the bathroom and then stop when I see a white robe hanging in the doorway that wasn’t there before. I hesitantly pull the robe off the hanger like it’s going to bite me or something and then put it on.

  “Oh my God!” I moan as I wrap the soft robe around my body. It’s the softest, most comfortable thing I have ever worn. I walk into the bathroom and find my clothes nicely folded up on the counter.

  Did Sean do that?

  He must have because no one else came into the room to collect them, just like he must have put out the robe for me, knowing I would be cold the second I stepped out of the bedroom. I blink, thinking I’ve imagined this. That the same guy who flipped me over and fucked me against the bed just for him last night would do something so considerate as folding my clothes and putting out a robe blows my mind.

  I don’t understand Sean any more than he understands me.

  I grin. But I know how Sean looks naked, I know how his tongue can do things to me I never thought were possible, and I know how hard his dick is when it drives inside me. And that is all I care to know about Sean. Everything else doesn’t matter. I already know that he is a jerk in every way that matters. He just happens to be better than any man I’ve ever fucked combined in bed.

  * * *

  I decide to just wear the robe while I go in search of breakfast, but as I walk down the hallway to the main open room, I stop at a door that I don’t remember seeing when Sean led me to his bedroom last night. Curious, I open the door, but I’m let down when I see just a large desk sitting in the center of the room, looking out the large floor-to-ceiling windows, instead of a sex dungeon or some other crazy thing that I imagine Sean having.

  I start walking toward the kitchen, my stomach leading the way, when my curiosity gets the better of me. I walk back to his office and sit down at his desk. I glance up in the corners of the room, looking for a camera or some sort of security system that is watching me, but I find none.

  It doesn’t mean they aren’t there, I think.

  I sit for a minute, trying to decide if my curiosity is worth the punishment that Sean is going to give me if he finds out that I searched through his office.

  It’s worth it.

  I start opening drawers, searching through papers and files, looking for anything that will let me know what Sean does for a living when he’s not running Jamie’s company. Because, as much as I wish that I didn’t care at all about figuring out Sean, I do care. At least, I care enough to find out what dark, dirty thing he does to make the millions that he has

  I don’t know what Sean does for a living, and I’m afraid I might never know. My curiosity is going to kill me if I don’t find out though. I spent three hours searching through his condo for any clue, but I found none. Not one damn thing that pointed me in any sort of direction.

  My phone doesn’t get reception while riding the L train, so I couldn’t even spend my ride home looking him up. Instead, my mind came up with all sorts of crazy things. He’s in the mob. He sells drugs. He’s a porn star.

  Everything that I came up with just made me more and more concerned that, whatever Sean does, it isn’t good. I need to text Jamie. She knows what Sean does. Surely, she wouldn’t let him run the company if he was into illegal stuff. Would she?

  I climb up the seven flights of stairs to my apartment since the elevator is still broken—and most likely, always will be. I unlock the door and step inside, still thinking about Sean.

  “Where have you been? I’ve been going crazy here!” Keri says as I walk into my one-room loft.

  After seeing Sean’s place, I feel even more like I live in a closet. My kitchen has a fridge that barely fits a bottle of wine, a microwave that also functions as an oven, one burner plate, and three cabinets for storage. The rest of the room consists of a small TV balanced on top of a trunk filled with my clothes, and sitting across from it is my daybed that also functions as my couch. The door to the bathroom is next to my bed where I have a toilet and a shower that I can barely turn around in. The only nice part about my apartment is the balcony that I can barely fit a chair on, but if I sit out there and squint really hard while tilting my head to one side, then I can see Lake Michigan from between the buildings.

  “What are you doing here?” I ask.

  Keri shakes her head. “No. You answer me first. I was this close to calling the police to report you missing!” she says, moving her index finger and thumb close together.

  “I was with Sean,” I say, as I put my purse down.

  “Who?” Keri asks.

  I blush just a little. “My boss.”

  Now, Keri’s eyes grow big. “Why didn’t you answer any of my messages then? It’s not like he took you to Antarctica or someplace that doesn’t have any reception!” Keri yells at me.

  I pull my phone out of my purse and blush, more embarrassed that I didn’t even notice that I had any messages from anyone other than Sean.

  “Oh my God!” Keri says slowly as she realizes what happened. “You let him fuck you, didn’t you?” She throws up her hands. “I can’t believe you. I give up on you, Olive. I’ve really tried to get you to see your own self-worth and to stop dating these horrible guys who do nothing but hurt you, but you have to help yourself, too!”

  “Sean didn’t hurt me. Owen did, but Sean didn’t! I knew what I was getting into with Sean.”

  “How could he not? He fucked you and then left you, didn’t he? They all do.”

  I frown. “But, unlike Owen, he was up-front and told me he was going to leave me. I knew what I was getting into with Sean. I don’t even like him! I just needed some mind-blowing sex! I just needed something to make me forget about what Owen did.”

  Keri shakes her head. “It might not hurt now. But I know you, Olive. What happens when you want this guy to take you out to dinner or hold your hand during a romantic movie, and he says no? Then, how
are you going to feel?”

  My frown deepens. She really is never going to understand how I feel. That, for once in my life, I made the right decision for myself and not the wrong one.

  I dig my phone out of my purse and search Sean Burrows on my phone and wait for his image to show up, and then I push the phone in her face. “Do you really think I thought a guy like this was going to be into anything more than a one-time fuck? And do you really think I would pass up an opportunity to fuck a guy like Sean?”

  “Holy shit!” Keri says, grabbing the phone from me. “You really fucked him?” she asks, not able to tear her eyes away from the image that really doesn’t even do him justice.

  I grin. “Yes.”

  “Oh my God! Tell me everything! Was he as amazing in bed as I imagine him to be?”

  “Better.”

  “No way!” Keri says, typing something on my phone.

  “What are you doing?” I ask.

  “Sending the picture to my phone,” Keri says with a smile.

  I roll my eyes and grab my phone back before walking over and taking a seat on my daybed. I grab one of the pillows and squeeze it in my lap while Keri sits down next to me.

  “As much as I want to hear more about Sean, I have to ask you about Owen. What happened? He called me last night, frantic that you had gone crazy and said you broke up with him. That’s why I came over last night.”

  That’s when I notice that my bed isn’t made, and it’s clear that Keri spent the night sleeping in my bed.

  “He kissed another girl in a bar on our anniversary. So, I broke up with him. He’s a douche bag, just like you always said he was.”

  Keri looks down, not meeting my eyes.

  “What are you not telling me?” I ask.

  Keri slowly looks up at me. “It’s just…are you sure he was cheating on you?”