Mystics, Masters, Saints, and Sages
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uponaresplendent,never-endingsourceofunutterablejoyandpeacelyinghiddenin myinterior,waitingforafavorableopportunitytorevealitself,affordingmeinone
instantadeeperinsightintotheessenceofthingsthanawholelifedevotedtostudy
coulddo.
From LivingwithKundalinibyGopiKrishna.
151
LESTERLEVENSON
152
TWENTY-TWO
LESTERLEVENSON
1909–1994,UNITEDSTATES
LESTERLEVENSONisrelativelyunknowntomostspiritualseekers,unlesstheyhave
come upon what is called the “Sedona Method” Lester's own method of achieving enlightenment, which has been systematized for his students. A self-made man,
Lester was not particularly spiritual in his early years. A physicist and engineer, he also achieved financial success in restaurant, lumber, building, oil, and real estate businesses. He lived in New York City, and his life revolved mainly around his relationshipswithwomenandhisbusinessendeavors,althoughhewasalsoanavid
patronofthearts.
By 1952, however, at the age of forty-two, after his second heart attack, Lester found himself on the brink of death. Suffering also from chronic jaundice, kidney stones, migraine headaches, and a perforated ulcer, Lester was abandoned by his doctorandsenthometodie.
Noteagertosuccumbtohisphysician'sdeathsentence,Lesterbeganseriouslyto
question and reevaluate the very purpose of his life. Over a three-month period, he notonlysucceededatreleasingeachandeveryobstacletohishappiness,butallofhis health problems spontaneously disappeared! Lester found a way to become
enormously happy and to develop yogic powers he had never even known existed.
Allthiswithoutanyspiritualinstructionwhatsoever.
Realizingthathisproblemswereself-causedbyhisownerroneousthinking,Lester
foundfreedom.Whenhewasabletoreleasenegativethoughtsandfeelings,hefelt
tremendousreliefandinnerpeace.Lesterbecameacutelyawarethattheonlytimehe
had been really happy was not when he was loved, but when he was loving others, particularlythewomeninhislife.Heresolvedtolovenotonlywomen,buteveryone
hemet,andtoreleaseanyfeelingsthatinterferedwiththatloving.Suchanattitude
servedtoenhancehishappinessevenmore.
Soon Lester noticed that his life changed dramatically for the better. Having discovered the secrets of happiness and freedom, he found himself identified with every being and every atom in the universe. Lester saw God in everyone and
everythingandwasinastateofcompleteharmony.Hisdelightknewnobounds.
Following his realization, Lester relinquished his businesses and moved to the desertoutside Sedona, Arizona.He taught small groupsof students, whoeverfound him out of their own search for ultimate freedom. Eventually a center grew around him,thoughLesterneversoughtfame.Fornearlytwentyyears,heandhisstudents
sharedtheSedonaMethodwithpeoplefromallwalksoflife,includingHollywood
celebrities.LesterLevenson'ssoledesirewastosharewithotherswhathehadbeen
sofortunatetorealize:permanenthappiness.
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The selection is from unpublished autobiographical material by Lester Levenson, madeavailablebyHaleDwoskin,astudentofLester'sforeighteenyears,whocarries
onhiswork.
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RELEASINGFORULTIMATEFREEDOM
IWAS at the end of my rope. I was told not to take a step unless I absolutely had to because there was a possibility that I could drop dead at any moment. This was a terrible,shockingthingtosuddenlybetoldthatIcouldn'tbeactiveanymore,having
beensoactiveallmylife.Itwasahorriblething.
An intense fear of dying overwhelmed me, the fear that I might drop dead any minute.Thisstayedwithmefordays.Iwentthroughareal,horrible,low,spinning
periodthere,inthegripofintensefearofdyingorofbeingacripplefortherestof mylifeinthatIwouldn'tbeabletobeactive.HowcouldItakecareofallthat,and
me.Ifeltthatlifewouldnotbeworthwhileanymore.
This caused me to conclude with determination, “Either I get the answers, or I'll takemeoffthisearth.Noheartattackwilldoit!”Ihadaniceeasywaytodoit,too.I hadmorphinethedoctorsgavemeformykidneystoneattacks.
Afterseveraldaysofthisintensefearofdying,Isuddenlyrealized,“Well,I'mstill
alive.AslongasI'malivethere'shope.AslongasI'malive,maybeIcangetoutof
this.WhatdoIdo?”
Well, I was always a smart boy, always made the honor roll. Even got myself a four-year scholarship to Rutgers University at a time when scholarships were very rarethroughcompetitiveexaminations.Butwhatdoesthisavailme?Nothing!HereI
amwithallthisbrilliance,asmiserableandscaredascanbe.
ThenIsaid,“Lester,youwerenotonlynotsmart,youweredumb!Dumb!Dumb!
There'ssomethingwronginyourintellect.Withallyourknowledge,you'vecometo
this bottom end! Drop all this knowledge you've so studiously picked up on
philosophy,psychology,socialscience,andeconomics!Itisofnoavail!Startfrom
scratch.Beginalloveragainyoursearchfortheanswers.”
And with an extreme desperation and intense wanting out—not wanting to die, I began to question, “What am I? What is this world? What is my relationship to it?
WhatdoIwantfromit?”
“Happiness.”
“‘Well,whatishappiness?”
“Beingloved.”
“But I am loved. I know several very desirable girls with beauty, charm, and intellectwhowantme.AndIhavetheesteemofmyfriends.Yet,I'mmiserable!”
Isensedthattheclosestthingrelatedtohappinesswaslove.SoIbeganreviewing
andrelivingmypastloveaffairs,lookingatthepointswherethelittlehappinessthatI hadwere.Ibegantopullupanddissectallmyhighmomentsofloving.Suddenly,I
gotaninklingthatitwaswhenIwaslovingthatIhadthehighestfeeling!
I remembered one evening, a beautiful balmy evening, in the mountains when I wascampingwithVirginia.Wewerebothlyingonthegrass,bothlookingupatthe
sky, and I had my arm around her. The nirvana, the perfection of the height of happiness was right there. I was feeling how great is love for Virginia! How wonderfulisknowingallthisnature!Howperfectasetting!
ThenIsawthatitwasmylovingherthatwasthecauseofthishappiness!Notthe
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beautyofthesetting,orbeingwithVirginia.
ThenIimmediatelyturnedtotheotherside.Boyitwasgreatwhenshelovedme!I
remembered the moment when publicly this beautiful, charming girl told the world that she approved of Lester, she loved Lester—and I could feel that nice feeling of approval.ButIsensedthatitwasnotasgreataswhatIhadjustdiscovered.Itwasnot a lasting feeling. It was just for the moment. In order for me to have that feeling continuously,shehadtocontinuesayingthat.
So,thismomentaryegoapprovalwasnotasgreatasthefeelingoflovingher!As
long as I was loving her, I felt so happy. But when she loved me, there were only momentsofhappinesswhenshegavemeapproval.
Days of further cogitation gradually revea
led to me that this was correct! I was happierwhenIlovedherthanIwaswhenIgotthatmomentaryego-satisfactionwhen
she loved me. Her loving me was a momentary pleasure that needed constant
showingandprovingonherpart,whilemylovingherwasaconstanthappiness,as
longasIwaslovingher.
Iconcludedthatmyhappinessequatedtomyloving!IfIcouldincreasemyloving,
thenIcouldincreasemyhappiness!ThiswasthefirstinklingIhadastowhatbrings
abouthappiness.AnditwasatremendousthingbecauseIhadn'thadhappiness.And
Isaid,“Gee,ifthisisthekeytohappiness,I'vegotthegreatest!”Eventhehopeof
getting more and more happiness was a tremendous thing, because this was the numberonethingIwanted—happiness.
Thatstartedmeonweeksandweeksofreviewingmypastloveaffairs.Idugup
fromthepast,incidentafterincidentwhenIthoughtIwasloving,andIdiscovered
that I was being nice to mygirlfriends, trying toget them to loveme, and thatthat wasselfish.Thatwasnotreallylove.Thatwasjustwantingmyegobolstered!
Ikeptreviewingincidentsfromthepast,andwhereIsawthatIwasnotloving,I
would change that feeling to loving that person. Instead of wanting them to do somethingforme,Iwouldchangeittomywantingtodosomethingforthem.Ikept
thisupuntilIcouldn'tfindanymoreincidentstoworkon.
Thisinsightonlove,seeingthathappinesswasdeterminedbymycapacitytolove,
was a tremendous insight. It began to free me, and any bit of freedom when you're plaguedfeelssogood.IknewthatIwasintherightdirection.Ihadgottenholdofa
linkofthechainofhappinessandwasdeterminednottoletgountilIhadtheentire
chain.
Ifeltagreaterfreedom.Therewasaneasierconcentrationofmymindbecauseof
it.AndIbegantolookbetteratmymind.Whatismymind?Whatisintelligence?
Suddenly, a picture flashed of amusement park bumper-cars that are difficult to steer so that they continually bump into each other. They all get their electrical energyfromthewirescreenabovethecarsthroughapolecomingdowntoeverycar.
The power above was symbolic of the overall intelligence and energy of the
universecomingdownthepoletomeandeveryoneelse,andtothedegreewestepon
the gas do we use it. Each driver of the cars is taking the amount of energy and intelligencethathewantsfromthatwire,buthesteershiscarblindlyandbumpsinto
othercars,andbumpsandbumps.
I saw that if I chose to, I could take more and more of that overall intelligence.
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AndsoIdugintothat.Ibegantoexaminethinkinganditsrelationshiptowhatwas happening. And it was revealed that everything that was happening had a prior thought behind it and that I never before related the thought and the happening becauseoftheelementoftimebetweenthetwo.
WhenIsawthateverythingthatwashappeningtomehadathoughtofitbeforeit
happened,IrealizedthatifIcouldgrabhold of this, I could consciously determine everythingthatwashappeningtome!
And above all, I saw that I was responsible for everything that had happened to me,formerlythinkingthattheworldwasabusingme!Isawthatmywholepastlife,
andallthattremendousefforttomakemoneyandintheend,failing,wasdueonlyto
mythinking!
This was a tremendous piece of freedom, to think that I was not a victim of this world,thatitlaywithinmypowertoarrangetheworldthewayIwantedittobe,that
ratherthanbeinganeffectofit,Icouldnowbeatcauseoveritandarrangeittheway Iwouldlikeittobe!
Thatwasatremendousrealization,atremendousfeelingoffreedom!
IwassoillwhenIstartedmysearching;Ihadonefootinthegrave.AndwhenI
sawthatmythinkingwascauseforwhatwashappeningtome,Iimmediatelysawmy
bodyfrommychindowntomytoesasperfect.Andinstantly,Iknewitwasperfect!I
knewthelesionsandadhesionsofmyintestineduetoperforatedulcerswereundone.
Ikneweverythingwithinmewasinperfectrunningorder.Anditwas.
Discoveringthatmyhappinessequatedtomyloving,discoveringthatmythinking
wasthecauseofthingshappeningtomeinmylifegavememoreandmorefreedom.
FreedomfromunconsciouscompulsionsthatIhadtowork,Ihadtomakemoney,I
hadtohavegirls.FreedominthefeelingthatIwasnowabletodeterminemydestiny,
Iwasnowabletocontrolmyworld,Iwasnowabletoarrangemyenvironmentto
suit me. This new freedom lightened my internal burden so greatly that I felt that I hadnoneedtodoanything.
Plus,thenewhappinessIwasexperiencingwassogreat!Iwasexperiencingajoy
thatIhadneverknownexisted.Ihadneverdreamedhappinesscouldbesogreat.
Idetermined“Ifthisissogreat,I'mnotgoingtoletgoofituntilIcarryitallthe way!” I had no idea how joyous a person could be. So, I began digging further on how to extend this joy. I began further changing my attitudes on love. I would imaginethegirlIwantedmostmarryingoneofmyfriends,ortheboyIwouldwant
her to marry least, and then enjoy their enjoying each other. To me, this was the extremeinloving,andifIcouldachieveit,itwouldgivememoreofthiswonderful
thingthatIwasexperiencing.
AndsoIworkedonit.Itookaparticularfellow,Burl,andaparticulargirl,andI
wouldn'tletgountilIcouldreallyfeelthejoyoftheirenjoyingeachother.
ThenIknewIhadit—oralmosthadit.
Thenlateron,Ihadfurthertestsofthisintalkingtopeoplewhowereopposingme
noendwhenIwastryingtohelpthem.Iwouldconsciouslyfeelthegreatestlovefor
themwhentheywereattackingme.Andthejoyoflovingthemwassowonderful,I
would, without any thought, thank them so profusely for having given me the
opportunityoftalkingwiththem,thatitthrewthemintoadither.
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ButIreallyfeltthat.Ithankedthemfromthebottomofmyheartforhavinggiven me the opportunity of loving them when they were making it as difficult as they possiblycould.Ididn'texpressthattothem.Ijustthankedthemfortheopportunity
ofhavingbeenabletotalkwiththem.
ThatIwasabletodothiswasgoodnewstomebecause,likeotherthings,Iwas
abletocarrylovingtotheextreme.Icouldlovepeoplewhowereopposingme.AndI
wouldnotstopuntilIcouldseetheendofthelineofthishappinessIwasgetting.I
wouldgohigherandhigherandhigherandsay,“Oh,mygosh,therecanbenothing
higherthanthis!”ButIwouldtry.And,Iwouldgohigher.ThenIwouldsay,“Oh,
there can't be anything higher than this!” But I would try, and go higher! And then say,“Oh,therecan'tbeanythinghappierthanthis!”untilIrealizedtherewasnolimit tohappiness!
Iwouldgetincapacitated.Icouldlookatmybody,andIcouldn'tmoveitIwasso
top-heavy with ecstasy and joy. I was actually incapacitated. I would do this for hours, going higher and higher and then I would have to work for hours to keep comingdownanddownanddownuntilIcouldstartbeingthebodyagaininorderto
operateit.
Contemplatingthesourceofintelligenceandenergy,Idiscoveredthatenergy,as<
br />
wellasintelligence,wasavailableinunlimitedamounts,andthatitcamesimplyby
myfreeingmyselffromallcompulsions,inhibitions,entanglements,hang-ups.Isaw
thatIhaddammedupthisenergy,thispower,andallIhadtodowaspryloosethe
logsofthedamwhichweremycompulsionsandhang-ups—andthatwaswhatIdid.
AsIletgoofthesethings,Iwasremovinglogsandallowingthisinfiniteenergyto
flow,justlikeawaterdamflowsifyoupullthelogsout,onebyone.Themorelogs
youpullout,thegreatertheflow.AllIneededtodowastoremovetheselogsandlet
theinfinitepowerandenergyflow.
Seeingthis,thepowerthatwasrightbehindmymindwasallowedtoflowthrough
likeithadneverflowedbefore.ThereweretimeswhenI'dgetthisrealizationofwhat
Iamthatwouldputsomuchenergyintome,Iwouldjustjumpupintheairfrommy
chair. I would go right straight out the front door, and I would start walking and walkingandwalking,forhoursatatime—sometimesfordaysatatime!Ijustfeltas
though my body would not contain it, that I had to walk or run some of it off. I rememberwalkingthestreetsofNewYorkCityintheweehoursofthemorning,just
walkingataverygoodpace,andnotbeingabletodoanythingotherwise!Ihadto
expendsomeofthatenergy.Itwassotremendous.
I saw that the source of all this energy, of all intelligence was basically harmonious, and that harmony was the rule of the universe. And that was why the planets were not colliding, and that was why the sun rose every day, and that was whyeverythingwent.
When I started my search, I was a very convinced and absolute materialist. The onlythingthatwasrealwasthatwhichyoucouldfeelandtouch.Myunderstanding
oftheworldwasassolidasconcrete.Andwhensomeoftheserevelationscameto
methattheworldwasjustaresultofmymind,thatthinkingdeterminedallmatter,
that matter had no intelligence, and that our intelligence determined all matter and everything about it. When I saw that the solidity that I formerly had was only a 158