Notes on His Pillow

by Diana Currie

  Caroline spies us immediately and I'm actually surprised to see her, though I don't know why; this is where she works and it's her headquarters for all the Winter Gala planning. "Amanda, finally!" she exclaims. "Come, come and see your exhibit!" My future mother-in-law is dressed in a crème cashmere sweater with a white fur collar and a long black skirt. She looks fabulous as always as she hugs Adam, me, and then hands candy canes to the kids.

  "My exhibit?" I say as I dutifully follow her around a corner to another room of the gallery.

  It looks much like the front room only this one has many more pieces hanging on the walls. I see oil paintings of the Savannah River, water colors, portraits, and then I stop in my tracks sucking in a deep breath. My map of Swainsboro is framed and hanging on the left side of the back wall. The three large sections of the Savannah River front I drew are pieced together and hanging in the center. And on the right side is an 8x10 candid photograph of me that I remember Adam taking weeks ago. My name is written in large black script on the wall over my picture. Amanda Marie Sommerer. Wow.

  There are spotlights shining on my work and in the center of the space is a large table with a miniature scale model of the Savannah River Street. It's beautifully hand painted and really takes what I've drawn and brings it to life.

  "Who made this?" I ask Caroline, looking at the model from all angles. It's so intricate and precise.

  "A man named Elmer Shank. He's a retired fisherman; lived here all his life."

  "Can I play with it, mommy?" Gabby asks from behind me.

  I turn around to see her hopeful face. "No, baby. It isn't a toy."

  "But there's dolls," she protests.

  "Those are little figures that go with the model. See right here? This is the building we're standing in right now," I say pointing to the scaled down version of the art gallery.

  Gabby is not impressed. "Mommy, why are you on the wall?"

  Adam steps forward and rests his arm around my shoulder proudly. "Your mommy is a very talented artist and her pictures are hanging on the wall so everybody in the town can see them."

  "Is this what you've been drawing every day?" Tyler wonders walking closer to the wall to inspect the maps.

  My chest swells with pride. "Yes, baby. Do you like them?" I ask. Tyler nods.

  Caroline says, "We've sold thirty prints already." She hands me an 11x14 poster with a glossy image of one section of the map. "You're our top seller so far this evening. Everyone's been asking about you. They want to know if you have plans to do any other local spots."

  "Really?" I ask dumbfounded. Who knew anyone would actually care about my art?

  "Yes, really," Caroline replies. "I talked to Maxwell, he's the owner, and he said anytime you have work to sell just bring it here." She's smiling wide and I can tell she's very pleased to give me this news. It must not be the case for every artist who walks through the door. I haven't been planning to do any more drawings but her excitement is infectious and I find myself wanting to find my next bit of inspiration while we're walking through town.

  Caroline shows us around the rest of the gallery and to my surprise there's far more than just paintings being showcased. Pottery, sculptures, and folk art are also displayed throughout the building; a very eclectic mix of subject matter and techniques. As we head back into the front room I see a white haired woman purchasing one of my prints. Caroline walks me over to the woman to introduce us and to my complete surprise the woman asks me to sign my name on her print. The man behind the counter gives me a Sharpie pen and I sign my very first autograph with color in my cheeks; embarrassed to be the center of attention even for a few moments.

  Adam kisses my cheek after the woman leaves and I can tell he's proud of me. For years I've thought that giving up my opportunity to go to college meant that I'd never be able to call myself a real artist. Signing that reproduction of something I drew just gave me a rush of confidence that maybe I could pursue this passion without a degree. Immediately I think of the B&B and wonder if Mr. Thatcher would mind if I drew the old Victorian home for my next project?

  "We'd better get moving. Our reservations are in fifteen minutes," Caroline reminds us, breaking me from my train of thought.

  We walk together to the restaurant that's right on the waterfront. I've never been here before and I hope the kids can behave themselves through the entire dinner. I'm happy to see that the atmosphere inside is more casual and family friendly than I expected. Maybe it's just due to the Christmas festivities happening tonight but there are lots of other kids present so I feel better about bringing my six and three year old here.

  Bianca and Andrew are already at the table as we are escorted over by the hostess. Gregory is there too with Chloe sitting in a high chair beside him. Adam and I hug and greet everyone while Tyler claims the seat closest to the window. The view is amazing through large floor to ceiling windows looking out over the water. Gabby usually insists on sitting in her chair like a big girl but after seeing Chloe in the high chair she decides she wants one too. The hostess brings a second high chair over and Gabby climbs inside as Adam pushes it over next to her future cousin.

  "Hi Chloe!" Gabby gushes.

  "Hi!" Chloe replies holding up her juice box to show Gabby. "Juice!"

  "I want some too," Gabby replies trying to take it from her.

  I smile at the girls' exchange and sit down beside my daughter. She's a little big for the wooden high chair and I don't want her falling if she tries to climb out. Adam takes the seat beside me and reaches for my hand under the table. I think he's nervous but Chloe barely acknowledges him. She's busy with the attention Gabby is giving her.

  We watch Bianca as she searches through a newly acquired diaper bag and fishes out ziplock baggies of fresh cut carrots and whole wheat crackers. I'm sure most of her thoughtful and healthy snacks will end up on the floor but keep my mouth shut as she sets up a rubber place mat for Chloe and dumps the food into little plastic bowls with suction cups on the bottoms. She places a second pouch of organic apple juice in from of Gabby.

  "Thank you," I say. "It looks like motherhood is agreeing with you."

  Bianca sits down next to Gregory and beams at me. "I love it. Chloe is such a sweetheart. She has so much energy and does the cutest things. Like yesterday when Andrew left for work she ran over to him with her arms open wide to give him a goodbye hug. You should have seen his face; he's already wrapped around her little finger."

  Adam returns her smile. "She looks very happy, Bianca. Thank you for that."

  "We're the ones who should be thanking you. She's the best gift we've ever received and even though her road to us was a bumpy one I still feel like it was meant to be."

  Andrew who is sitting beside Bianca rolls his eyes; a loving smile lighting up his face. "My wife has turned into such a sap. She used to be a real hard A-S-S and last night she was practically in tears because she clipped Chloe's fingernail a little too close to the skin."

  "Says the man who just spelled out A-S-S," Adam teases.

  Everyone laughs as our waitress comes over to the table to take drink orders. Gregory orders a bottle of wine for the table and I ask for milk for the kids.

  "Mommy, the magician's here," Tyler says pointing toward the restaurant's entrance.

  I look over to see Alexander and Paige approaching our table. I had no idea they were coming and apparently neither did Caroline. She jumps out of her chair to greet them; exclaiming how wonderful it is to have all her babies together.

  "How did you know where we were?" she wonders.

  Alexander kisses his mother's cheek. "You weren't at the gallery so I texted Andrew. Looks like we have perfect timing."

  Gregory stands to greet his son and daughter-in-law and pulls two more chairs over from an empty table beside ours. "It's so great to have you both here," he greets.

  The waitress brings over the beverages and places empty glasses in front of Alexander and Paige who have squeezed in at the other end of the table. I
smile and wave at Paige and she returns the gesture. After our dinner orders are taken and everyone has a glass of Merlot in front of them Caroline stands up to make a toast.

  "If I could have your attention, please," she begins clinking her glass with a fork. "I want to thank all of you for coming to the Winter Gala this year. I'll always remember tonight as our celebration of the expansion of our family. Andy informed us earlier that the adoption paperwork has just been finalized and we can officially welcome Chloe Brickman to our family!" She pauses as everyone, including Chloe, claps their hands.

  She continues, "And I also want to say congratulations to Adam and Amanda on their engagement. We're so thrilled to have you join the family, Amanda. You and your darling little children have made Adam so happy, and we can't thank you enough! To Chloe, our first grandchild! And to Amanda, who is giving us two more. And who knows, maybe someday even more if we're lucky! Cheers!"

  Everyone clinks glasses as I look at Adam with shock in my eyes. He's laughing and kisses my forehead as I process what his mother just said. So she's expecting me to give her another grandbaby is she? Well, I suppose the woman does deserve at least one biological grandchild in her lifetime. No wonder Paige feels so pressured to get pregnant. I'm not even a Brickman yet and I'm already feeling the heat.

  “Mom, can we get married before you start in on the baby talk?" Adam says trying to sound serious but I can see through him.

  Caroline can too and she just waves him off playfully. He gives up the fight and breaks into a wide smile. I'm glad that Adam is getting along better with his parents. Lindsey was the wedge between them and now that she's gone for good the tension has dissipated on both sides. I know that they are happy he finally escaped her hooks when he met me. It means a lot that his parents and his brothers and sisters consider me worthy of being with Adam and a part of the whole Brickman clan. I love the idea of being part of a big family and I'm looking forward to officially becoming part of this one.

  After dinner everyone walks together down River Street where carolers are singing and hot cocoa is being given away in exchange for donations to a local charity. I give each of the kids a dollar to put in the tin can and as they walk back to our group I can see how tired they are. Gabby is rubbing her eyes and Tyler asks for the hundredth time if he can ride in the stroller. Andrew is holding Chloe who has been asleep on his shoulder since we left the restaurant.

  "We better get going," I announce. "The kids are losing steam and we have a long walk back to the car."

  "I'll carry Tyler piggyback," Adam says.

  "Thank you."

  I hug Adam briefly and reach up on my tiptoes for a kiss. His arms wrap around me and for a few moments I don't want to let him go. His body heat is warming me up and it's never easy for me to pry my lips off his, but I hear Paige and Bianca giggling behind us and that temporarily breaks the spell I'm under.

  "We'll pick this up when we get home," I whisper conspiratorially.

  "I'm going to hold you to that," he replies grinning.

  We say goodbye to all the Brickmans and start our trek along the street back to the parking lot. Tyler and Gabby fall asleep in the back of Adam's car before we even hit the highway.

  ... Ten days later, New Year's Eve...

  "You're so mean to put on a movie and give them pillows and blankets. They didn't stand a chance of making it to midnight," Adam says.

  "I know, but I still get Mommy credit for saying yes to letting them try," I smirk looking down at my sleeping children sprawled out on the living room sofa in Adam’s new house.

  "So mean," he repeats shaking his head.

  "Now that we live here you will get to learn all my parenting tricks," I say.

  "I'm intrigued. What other tricks do you have?"

  "Let's see... slipping puree veggies into the hamburger helper. And telling Gabby that Rebecca's dog ate her last pacifier. Oh, and if I want them to go to bed in thirty minutes but they want to watch a movie I just fast forward to the last half hour so the credits start rolling right at bedtime."

  Adam walks over to the dining room table and opens a bottle of wine. "You're an evil genius," he says as he pours two glasses.

  Now that the kids are asleep on the couch we can sit together by the fire and talk until midnight instead of watching the nauseating New Years Eve hosts on television. Adam hands me a glass of wine and we walk over to the two high backed chairs we bought in Atlanta and placed in front of the fireplace in our new home. The four of us have been in the house together for three nights now and all of our belongings are finally unpacked. Tommy moves back into my former house tomorrow with Nikki; extremely happy to be out of his tiny apartment.

  The kids now have two houses, two bedrooms, and in some ways they will have two daddies. But I've realized that although this isn't the life I anticipated giving them when they were born, it is still a damn good one. Adam being in their lives just means there will be one more person around who loves them. Many more if you count all the Brickmans who have welcomed all three of us into their family with open arms. We're very lucky.

  Adam notices my quiet introspection. "Are you happy?" he asks.

  "Happy is not a strong enough word. You make me feel... cherished, loved, and blessed."

  He shoots me a wide grin and lifts his glass. "To starting off the New Year right. In our new home, all of us together, a blended and soon to be growing family." He winks, thinking he's being cute and subtle about wanting a baby.

  We clink glasses and I watch as he takes a long sip from his glass. I touch the wine to my lips but only pretend to drink. Our wedding date is set for March 8th and it can't come soon enough. Nothing will make me happier than becoming Amanda Brickman. And I'll be about fourteen weeks pregnant by then and I want us to be married before we announce that news. I'll have to discuss all this with Adam of course, once he knows about the baby. I haven't told him yet but he'll find out soon enough.

  After the ball drops at midnight Adam will undoubtedly take me upstairs to our new bedroom where he'll ask if I'm in the mood to make love. I'll say yes because there's no greater feeling in the world than to be wrapped in Adam's arms, expressing my love for him without any words.

  And that's when he'll discover the positive pregnancy test I put on the bed; right next to the note that says YOU'RE GOING TO BE A DADDY that I've left on his pillow.

  The End