Risking it All: An M/M, rockstar, second chance romance (Kingston Brothers Book 4)

by Isabel Lucero

  “Feels like I’m the best,” I tease.

  Ali chuckles and gives up. “You distracted me.”

  “How?”

  “You had your ass all out, and you’re looking at my mouth like you want to stick something in it.”

  I smirk. “Maybe I do.”

  Ali’s screen door swings open with a loud creak, and Liliana comes bounding out, her long hair flying behind her.

  “What’re y’all doing? I want to play.”

  “We’re not playing anymore,” Ali says, picking up the ball.

  “We can play another game,” I offer. Lili smiles up at me.

  “Nah, let’s go to your house,” Ali says. “I’m gonna shower first. Meet you there?”

  He walks backwards and gives me a wink.

  I smile in return. “Okay.”

  Lili crosses her arms. “He acts like I’m a baby. I’m fourteen. He’s only three years older than me.”

  “Sorry, Lil. We’ll play a game next time, okay?”

  “If you want to kidnap him and keep him at your place, feel free,” she says before storming back into the house.

  I wish.

  An hour later, I’m showered and dressed, and Ali’s hanging out with me in my room. Elijah’s out back cutting the grass, so we have some time to be alone.

  “I think you had mentioned putting something in your mouth.”

  Ali’s eyes twinkle as he spins around in my desk chair. He pushes away from the desk, the wheels sliding across the hardwood floor until he’s in front of me. “Did I?”

  I run my hand through his hair. “That’s what I heard.”

  Ali’s hands dip into the waistband of my shorts and he starts tugging them down. I purposely left off my underwear after my shower, knowing he was coming over and wanting less hassle.

  My cock bobs in front of him once he pulls the elastic down to the middle of my thighs.

  It’s been seven months since our second kiss. . .since the admission of being into each other. In the beginning, there was a lot of kissing and dry humping. Then we moved onto jacking each other off and blowjobs. As of three months ago, we had sex for the first time.

  Ali’s hand wraps around the base of my cock and squeezes. His tongue dances around my crown before he sucks me into his mouth.

  “Fuck,” I hiss, gripping his hair in my hand. “Your mouth, Ali. Your mouth can bring me to my knees.”

  He pulls off. “You can be on your knees later. Let me taste you.”

  Ali is the fucking best at blowjobs. Okay, he’s the only person who’s ever given me one, but I know he’s the best. He has to be. His mouth was made for my cock. He always knows just what to do. I felt like I fumbled around for a while in the beginning. I felt awkward and unsure, but Ali sucked my dick like he’d been doing it for years.

  Sure enough, like usual, it doesn’t take more than ten minutes to get me off. And that’s with me really struggling to hold back. He finishes me off like a champ, leaving no mess behind.

  “God, you’re good.”

  He wipes his lips, grinning up at me. I grasp his chin with my forefinger and thumb.

  “Wanna kiss me?” he asks.

  I pull him up. “You’re fuckin’ right I do.”

  We end up falling into my bed and I happily return the favor. When we’re fully dressed again, Ali lays on his side and pierces me with his eyes.

  “I really like you.”

  I chuckle. “I kinda thought so.”

  He grins. “I mean. . . a lot. You’re. . .fuck. I don’t know. You’re so important to me.”

  “You’re important to me, too.”

  “I know we’re almost eighteen, and I get that that’s young, but I’ve known you for four years now, and we’ve been through a lot of shit together. I just want you to know you’ll always have a place in my heart. Nothing will ever change the way I feel about you.”

  I bring my hand up and graze his cheek with my knuckles. He’s so fucking beautiful. “I feel the same way.”

  He smiles, gives me a kiss, then pulls away. “Okay, I guess I’ll stop being sappy now.”

  “Never stop being sappy.”

  11

  Alejandro

  Present Day

  When I wake up, it’s because there’s a shrieking baby in my room.

  “What the hell?” I say aloud, turning over and looking in the direction of the door.

  “If I can’t get any sleep, you can’t either,” Lili says, rocking my niece in her arms. “Mami wants you up and in the kitchen.”

  I groan. “I’m twenty-seven.”

  “You’re staying in her house. You know the rules.”

  “What’s wrong with Mari?”

  “She’s hungry, I think. I’m about to go feed her.” Lili trots across the room and yanks open the curtains. “Get up, lazy ass.”

  “I hate you,” I grumble as she leaves the room.

  After I glance at the clock and realize it’s later than I thought, I hurry out of bed, grab some clothes, and head for the shower. I don’t typically sleep until ten o’clock. My mom always wanted us up by eight when we lived with her.

  Lili lives two blocks away, so she’s with Mom a lot, and now with the baby, I’m sure they’re both happy to have each other nearby.

  Mari’s dad turned out to be a piece of shit and left around the sixth month of Lili’s pregnancy. They had been together for two years, but he decided to take an out-of-state job and leave them both. Luckily, Lili’s been handling things pretty well, considering.

  When I enter the kitchen, I notice my mom has pots and pans on every burner on the stove. She’s a short and stout woman, standing at only five foot four. I watch as she moves around the kitchen wearing a faded floral apron.

  “Mami, why are you cooking so much so early?”

  “Early? It’s almost noon.”

  “It’s ten-thirty.”

  She pierces me with her dark brown eyes. “The food will be ready by lunch, now come give me a kiss, then unload the dishwasher.”

  I do as she says. “What’re you making? Smells good.”

  “Pozole and sopapillas.” My eyes light up at sopapillas. “And I don’t want to see you reaching for them until you’ve eaten.”

  “Ah, you’re no fun.”

  She chuckles. “You’ll be fine.”

  After I put the dishes away, Lili and a much quieter Mari join us in the kitchen.

  “Mm. I can’t wait to eat,” Lili says, sniffing the air.

  “Give the baby to Alejandro and come help me with some of these pots,” Mom says, gesturing to the stovetop.

  Lili hands Mari to me and whispers, “I like how she says help me but it’s just gonna be me washing these pots.”

  “What was that?” Mami asks.

  “Nothing,” Lili adds quickly, giving her a smile.

  “Mmhhmm.”

  I take Mari to the living room and start humming to her as I study her adorable little face poking out of the pink blanket she’s wrapped up in.

  A car pulls up outside the house, grabbing my attention. “Someone’s here.”

  “Oh shit, he’s early,” Lili says. I hear the smack my mom delivers to her arm, followed quickly by Lili saying, “Ow!”

  “Language.”

  I chuckle and look back down at Mari. “Your mommy’s in trouble. What’s new, right?”

  “Shut up,” Lili says, flying into the living room. “Can you change her?”

  I glance back out the window and don’t see anybody exiting the black SUV. “New boyfriend?”

  “Please.” She rolls her eyes. “Just go change her.”

  “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

  “Ugh. Useless.”

  “I can answer the door for your boyfriend. Just go.”

  “He’s not my boyfriend, stupid.”

  “Stop fighting in front of the baby,” Mami yells from the kitchen.

  Me and Lili grin at each other, then someone knocks on the door.

  �
��I’ll get it,” Lili says, darting to the door.

  I cradle the baby in my arms, waiting to see this guy Lili invited over for lunch.

  “Hey,” she greets with a huge smile. “I’m glad you could make it.”

  “Of course.”

  Lili steps back and Merrick fucking Kingston steps in.

  My gasp is audible, and his head snaps in my direction.

  God, he’s gorgeous. How can someone continue to get more and more good-looking? Isn’t there a limit? Shouldn’t he stop growing more handsome, so he doesn’t put every other man to shame?

  When I finally focus on his eyes, I can tell he’s just as surprised as I am. But that doesn’t make sense, because this is my house. Well, my mom’s house, but shouldn’t he have guessed I’d be here?

  He looks back at Lili, who’s smiling like a crazy person. Ah, now I get it. This is all her doing.

  Merrick’s eyes land back on me and his stupid perfect lips quirk up on the side, making him even more attractive. I’ve always loved his cocky grin.

  I mean, I used to love it.

  “Hey, Ali.”

  12

  Merrick

  Present Day

  Ali looks me up and down as discreetly as possible, but it puts a smirk on my face.

  “Kingston,” he says by way of greeting. “Lili, can I talk to you for a second?”

  Lili glances at me then back to her brother. “Um. No.”

  “Lili,” he growls.

  “Oh, come on, guys. You had a fight, but it’s been years. Let’s kiss and make up.”

  I chance a look at Ali and lift a brow. He scowls at me in return. “You don’t know the details,” he says quietly.

  “Then fill me in,” she replies, putting her hands on her hips.

  “Maybe I should go.”

  Lili turns to me. “No! Mami made all this food. She’ll kill me and you both.”

  “Mami knew?” Ali asks, his eyes growing wide.

  “Of course I knew,” Luisa says, coming straight for me. “Give me a hug. How are you?”

  I wrap my arms around her, having to bend down a little. “I’m doing good. How’ve you been?”

  She takes a step back, holding onto my hands and giving me a once over. “I’m just fine. Doesn’t look like you’ve missed many meals, but I’m gonna fatten you up, anyway.”

  I laugh. “Okay, sounds good.”

  “You have about thirty minutes before it’s done. Lili, get the baby and come with me. You boys can catch up.”

  Ali sighs, handing the baby to Lili.

  “Don’t worry. You can hold her later,” Lili says.

  “Come on,” Ali says, his voice gruff. “We’ll go out back.”

  I follow him outside, my eyes taking advantage of the view. Ali always had good muscle tone, but now he’s a lot bigger. He must spend a lot of time in the gym. His brown hair is cut a little shorter than I remember, but still long enough for me to tug on.

  Why am I thinking like that? He clearly hates me.

  Once we’re in the backyard, he sits down in one of the patio chairs, so I choose one across from him.

  “I can’t believe Lili invited you,” he says, shaking his head.

  “Well, I didn’t expect you to be here either. She told me you would be gone.”

  “How did she even know how to get in touch with you? I don’t even have your number.”

  “I ran into her last night. She wanted my number so we could plan to meet up. She wanted me to see the baby.”

  He keeps shaking his head, but he never looks at me.

  “Ali,” I say softly.

  His eyes meet mine, and we stay connected for several seconds before I can find words. I want to say so much and have no idea where to start.

  You look really good.

  I’m sorry.

  Please forgive me.

  I want another chance.

  You’re so fucking beautiful.

  I want you.

  I’m an idiot.

  Are you happy?

  Do you have a boyfriend?

  Do I still have a chance?

  “I’ve missed you.”

  He rolls his eyes and looks away. “Sure.”

  I lean forward and rest my arms on the table between us. “Come on, man. You were my best friend. You were. . .everything to me. Of course I’ve missed you.”

  “I’m surprised you could remember me with all the women you’ve been with over the years. Who were the last ones? The two in Paris? Oh wait, no. There was another one in Germany, right? Two weeks ago?”

  I fall back in my chair and let my arms drop to the sides. “Don’t tell me you believe everything they say in the tabloids.”

  “So, you’re telling me none of that’s true?” he asks, throwing me a side eye before looking back at the yard.

  “Yeah, I’ve been out with women. Yes, I was seen with two chicks in Paris and one in Germany. But I didn’t sleep with them, Ali.”

  He snorts, not believing me. “It’s not like it even matters.”

  “I want you to believe me, so yes, it does it matter.”

  “I’ve believed you before, and you’ve only let me down.”

  I run my hand over my face and lean forward again. “Okay, yes. I’m a fucking asshole, okay? I know that. It lives with me every day. Have I slept with women? Yes, I have. I’ve done a lot of things I wish I didn’t, but you don’t understand what it’s like to be me. I’m having to lie to everybody on a day-to-day basis. I’ve been trying to lie to myself. I wondered if I could be with a woman, so I tried it. There’s women around all the time, and I wanted to get off without having to do it myself.

  “It’s not easy finding a man to be with when your face is everywhere. How could I hookup with a guy and be sure he wouldn’t run and tell everybody that Merrick Kingston is gay? So, yes, I’ve fucked some women, and I hated myself the entire time I was doing it. I’ve gotten blowjobs and handjobs from them, too. But those women in Paris and the one in Germany? I was not with them. I haven’t slept with anyone in a long time.”

  When Ali looks at me again, his eyes hold a sadness in them. Maybe pity. I hate that. I don’t want him to feel sorry for me. That wasn’t the point of my rant. I just want him to try to understand. I want him to know I won’t lie to him anymore.

  “Aren’t you tired?” he asks.

  I don’t have to ask what he’s talking about. I know he’s asking if I’m tired of pretending. “You have no idea.”

  His lips turn down in the corners. “You stopped calling me.”

  “You stopped answering.”

  “Well, I was mad at you.”

  “Was?” I ask, a little hopeful.

  Ali sighs and pins me with a look. “You didn’t tell me you were leaving town. You led me to believe we had a future together. You told me you loved me and you left two days later.”

  “Fuck, I’m so sorry, Ali.”

  I go to reach for him, but the back door opens. “Lunch is ready.”

  Ali quickly stands up and makes his way inside.

  13

  Alejandro

  5 ½ Years Ago

  “Come on, it’s my twenty-first birthday. I’m legal,” Merrick says with a pout.

  “Oh, please. Like you haven’t been drinking since you were fifteen.”

  “Yeah, but now it’s legal. We’re going to King’s Tavern. I want you there,” he says, grabbing my hand.

  I grin. “You’re so needy.”

  He chuckles and steps forward, pulling me into him. “Only for you.”

  “I just hate that we’ll be drinking, and you know how I get when I’m drinking.”

  Merrick bites his lip. “Mm. And I love it.”

  “Yeah, but I won’t be able to do anything about it. I won’t be able to touch you or kiss you, or whisper all the filthy things I want to do to you.”

  He drops his hands and cups my ass through my jeans. “Tell me now.”

  I bite his bottom lip gently and then suc
k it into my mouth. “We don’t have time. Cillian will be here any minute.”

  “But now I’m horny,” he whines.

  “You’re always horny,” I say with a laugh, pulling away from him.

  “Again, only for you.” He winks and my heart flutters.

  “Of course, I’ll come,” I say, heading toward my bedroom. “Let me change.”

  A week after Merrick’s twenty-first birthday, he starts acting strange. I catch him watching me with a forlorn look on his face. Every time I question him, he says it’s nothing, but I know him. I know it’s not nothing.

  He keeps having to go somewhere with his bandmates, and he doesn’t really tell me what they’re doing. They had a few more shows, but they were never gone more than a couple days. It’s weird, but he hasn’t mentioned much about the future of the band. They’ve spent so much time touring, selling their music, giving demos to anyone who’ll take them, and even creating their own music videos to upload to YouTube. They’re doing everything people do when they’re seeking a record deal, but these past few months, Merrick hasn’t said much.

  “Hey, Ali?”

  I step out of my kitchen and see him sitting on the couch. He’s spent a lot of time at my apartment, because it’s the only place we can be together the way we want to be. I’ve loved every second of it, and many daydreams have consisted of me wondering how it would be if we actually lived together.

  “What’s up?”

  “Wanna go on a date?”

  My eyebrows shoot up. “A date?”

  He grins. “Well, nobody will really know it’s a date except us, but I wanna take you out.”

  A smile stretches across my face. “Yeah, of course.”

  We end up going to Lucio’s for dinner—a fairly fancy Italian restaurant. We splurge, getting way more food than we need, and Merrick insists on a bottle of wine, making it feel more date-like, even though we make sure we don’t touch like a couple would.