by Taylor Dean
Jack had called more than a few times over the last week. She didn’t answer. He didn’t leave a message and she figured if he really had something to say, then he’d leave one. Right?
But it did make her wonder why he was calling so much? She’d made her feelings clear. She couldn’t share in the miracle of his growing child. It was asking too much of her. So what did he want? To check up on her? To shoot the breeze?
Nothing had changed. There was no sense in making the situation harder on both of them.
Therefore when Jack stopped by the house and she saw his handsome face through the peephole, she stared at him, getting her fill and soaking him in. Just like in the beginning, when she’d first met him, she didn’t answer the door. She couldn’t bring herself to face him. Too much had changed between them. He only knocked once and he didn’t say anything, but somehow Chloe felt that he knew she was there, staring at him like a creepy little stalker. If he waved, she’d die.
He didn’t. Their relationship had turned serious and complicated. All the fun had been sucked out of their lives and she missed cheerful Jack.
Chloe had no intention of torturing herself. Seeing him, talking to him, and hearing about his baby would only cause heartache.
It was better this way.
≈
On Sunday, Chloe pulled into Gwen’s driveway, trepidation filling her soul. Everything about this house reminded her of Jack. It wasn’t going to be an easy afternoon. It was a constant reminder of what “might have been.”
However, she’d grown to love the people inside of the house. They always welcomed her into their family with open arms.
And she needed them. It was as simple as that.
Dinner was just as loud and crazy as she remembered it. No one mentioned Jack or Taryn or the baby. Even the children didn’t ask where Uncle Jack was. Clearly, they’d been told not to. The conversation was light and silly and it was just what Chloe needed.
They lingered over dinner as the children retired to the TV room to watch a movie. Suddenly, the table fell silent as Chloe looked up to see Jack standing in the hallway. She did a double take, wondering if her imagination had conjured him up out of thin air.
He hadn’t come in the front door and Chloe realized he’d been there all along.
And she’d been set up.
“Jack,” she said, surprise evident in her tone.
“Hi Chloe,” he said quietly.
He looked horrible—his features haggard, his hair disheveled. Clearly, life was not going his way. Her heart went out to him. One thing was certain, Jack was not a happy man. Of course not, he’s with Taryn.
“Jackson, so glad to see you. You must have gotten home early,” Gwen said, sounding as though she was rehearsing lines from a play. “Look who’s here, everyone. What a coincidence. Chloe’s here too,” she exclaimed.
“Mom…stop…I think we’ve been found out,” Sydney told her, reading the expression on Chloe’s face.
Gwen looked flustered, but Chloe knew she meant well. Gwen popped to her feet, anxiously smoothing her hair. “Have a seat, Jackson. I’ll get you a plate.”
A place was quickly cleared directly across from her.
“No thanks, Mom. I don’t want anything.” Even though Jack spoke to his mother, his eyes were on Chloe.
The room turned hear-a-pin-drop silent. Only Grady continued to eat his food as if nothing was out of the ordinary.
Feeling uncomfortable, Chloe stood. “I should probably get going…”
Jack interrupted her. “Please don’t leave.” He stood also, facing her with intense eyes. “Please.”
There was something about his tone, something about his demeanor that gave her pause. He was so earnest, so sincere—and Chloe wondered what was going on.
It was obvious she’d avoided him this past week. He knew it. Hence the ambush. Still his actions seemed rather extreme. She would’ve given in eventually.
Instead he’d enlisted his family for help. Did he really think that was necessary?
“All right,” she said as she sat down and he did too. Her chest rumbled with a tingly sensation. Just the sight of Jack had the power to leave her weak at the knees. Sitting across from him was nearly her undoing.
“So, Harper, how is Amelie?” Gwen asked, her voice more high-pitched than usual. Clearly, she was grasping for conversation to fill in the awkward silence. “She had a little cold this week,” Gwen explained to everyone as if it were breaking news.
“She’s fine now, Mom. Thanks for asking,” Harper replied.
The table conversation turned into nothing more than background noise as Chloe’s attention focused on Jack.
“Good, I’m glad she’s fine,” Kayla added.
“Oh, me too. Babies and colds are so stressful,” Leann said.
“I hope you don’t get it, Harper,” Sydney told her.
It was the most uncomfortable conversation she’d ever heard at their dinner table. Stilted and forced. Everyone was looking for something to say, anything that would take the pressure off Jack and Chloe. The men stared down at their plates, saying nothing.
Except Grady. He continued to eat. “I’m glad I didn’t get it. I hate colds,” he muttered through his full mouth.
“How are you, Chloe?” Jack asked amidst the conversation. His eyes had never left hers.
Gwen suddenly piped in, clearly attempting to distract everyone from Jack and Chloe’s conversation. “I hope the other children don’t catch the cold as well.”
Chloe answered Jack, her eyes on him, unable to look anywhere else, “I’m good.”
Harper, sounding sidetracked, added, “It’s…um…a mild cold. It won’t be bad if they do get it.”
The scintillating dinner conversation continued—fading voices in the background of Chloe’s psyche. She heard them, but nothing registered. Gwen said, “I hear there’s a stomach flu bug going around. I hope none of the kids catch it.”
His voice low, Jack said, “You look beautiful. Rested. The vacation sun looks good on you.” After a short pause, he added, “You look different…at peace.”
It was true. While on vacation, she’d somehow found the elusive inner peace everyone always spoke so highly of. The respite gave her the time to see things as they really were. “The time away was good for me. I needed a breather to come to terms with…everything. It helped me to see things clearly; helped me to know what I wanted in life.” Chloe watched him, wondering at his state of mind. He seemed…subdued.
Leann tapped her fingers on the table nervously, the sound seeming to magnify in Chloe’s ears. “My neighbors had that stomach flu. They said it was nasty.”
Jack ignored his family, his eyes only for her. “I ran into Mark. He said he wanted you back.”
Jack never was one to beat around the bush. It was his way of asking if they were back together and she knew it.
Kayla began to stack the dirty dishes noisily. “The school said they had several children out with the flu.”
Chloe’s hands clenched together with nervous tension. “He wants us to give marriage another try. Make up for past mistakes and all that.”
“Is that what you want?” Jack asked.
“I’ve considered it,” she told him honestly.
Chloe’s thoughts turned to that day, right before she’d left on vacation, the day Mark had shown up on her doorstep and delivered a speech worthy of the big screen.
It had given her pause and she’d wondered if their marriage deserved a second chance. Feeling a little flustered, she’d mumbled something about needing time to think.
Upon returning from vacation, Chloe disembarked from the plane and—instead of finding her neighbor, Jennifer—found Mark waiting for her, a small bouquet of flowers in his hands. He was nothing if not persistent and it surprised her. He’d given up on her so easily in the past.
“Hey Chloe,” he said. “Welcome home.” Warmth rushed over her, from her head to her toes. Mark’s soothing voice immediat
ely lulled her into thinking all was right with the world. He always had that affect upon her. “I missed you,” he said as he pulled her close and hugged tightly.
Chloe felt as though she’d just come home to the place where she was always meant to be. She felt safe, protected, and loved.
Before he even spoke, Chloe knew what he wanted. He’d made his feelings clear.
He collected her luggage and solicitously made sure she was comfortable in the car. Once he was driving at a moderate speed in light traffic, he reached over and held her hand. His touch felt easy and familiar. She’d always been comfortable in Mark’s presence.
You know what I wish more than anything, Mark?”
“What?”
“I wish you would’ve been at my side when I was pregnant with Christopher.” She now knew he’d suffered right along with her at their devastating loss. His deep emotions had even affected his physical health. And yet, at the time, she’d had no idea how he’d felt. How had they let that happen?
“I’m here now, Chloe. And I don’t plan on leaving.”
Jack’s words echoed through her mind: “When you love someone, you stay with them through the good times as well as the bad times. It’s a part of life. We can’t pick and choose the times we’ll be supportive and ignore all the rest.”
Chloe turned in her seat. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.” He sounded hesitant.
“What if it happened again?”
“It won’t. It was a fluke. The odds are almost nonexistent of it happening again.” At the stoplight, he looked at her, unable to mask the naked fear in his eyes. “Right?”
“Yeah,” she said softly as she unclasped her hand from his. He’d just confirmed and validated her feelings.
“May I take you to lunch?” he asked.
Chloe knew what she needed to say to him. She’d known since the moment she’d seen him waiting for her.
“I think it would be best if you just took me home.”
Mark held his tongue until he pulled up in front of their home, the very home they thought they would raise their children in.
“You know what I miss the most?” Mark asked.
“What?”
“Saturday mornings. I miss sleeping in together, pancake breakfasts, lounging on the couch in sweats while reading a good book, lazy walks in the park, and milkshakes at our favorite ice cream parlor. Those were the best days. I especially miss those nights when we couldn’t fall asleep because we couldn’t stop talking about something.” He turned and faced her. “We’ve always shared an amazing friendship, Chloe. We can’t throw it away. We just can’t.” He couldn’t mask the pleading tone in his voice.
Chloe missed those days too and a part of her wanted it back. It would be so easy to slip back into her old life, as if the past year or so had never happened…
But it had. And the memories were the permanent, non-erasable kind.
“I’m sorry, Mark. We’ll always be friends. Always. But…I can’t go back. It’s time for me to move forward.”
Moving forward, never forgetting.
A few beats of tension-filled silence sat between them. “Without you.” Chloe saw no reason to expound. The reasons were obvious.
With or without Jack, her future did not include Mark Brennan.
“Thank you for the ride home, Mark. I appreciate it.”
With that, she exited the car, grabbed her luggage, and collapsed inside the safety of her home.
Even though the encounter with Mark had caused her to shed a few tears of regret, she knew she’d made the right decision.
She hadn’t seen Mark since.
Jack’s eyebrows furrowed as he awaited her answer. “And?” he prompted, bringing Chloe back into the present. With all the talk of sickness, Chloe began to wonder if Jack was ill. He really didn’t look well.
Grady, the only one who’d helped himself to thirds, outwardly groaned. “Stomach flu is the worst. Last time I had it, I couldn’t eat for two days. Thought I was gonna die.”
Sydney threw her crumpled napkin at Grady, hitting him in the face. “You think you’re suffering if you haven’t eaten for three hours, Grady.”
“I am,” Grady returned.
Chloe shook her head in the negative and said, “No,” without elaborating. It was answer enough. Jack’s eyes widened in response.
“Are you absolutely positive, Chloe?” Jack queried.
“I’m positive, Jack,” Chloe said without hesitation. In the end, there was only one fact that mattered.
Jack loved her. She knew it. Everything else was minutiae. That one simple truth kept her sane.
Gwen’s effusive voice cut into the tension. “I love to cook for you, Grady. You get so much enjoyment out of eating.” She spoke abnormally loud, as if trying to distract everyone from hearing her and Jack’s conversation.
Grady ladled another dollop of gravy on his mashed potatoes. “My compliments to the chef.”
Chloe felt one of the hardest things to endure over the last month—amongst many other things—was the thought of Taryn living in their house. “Are you still enjoying the house?” she asked, wondering if she sounded bitter.
“I moved back to my old house for the time being, Chloe. Taryn isn’t living in our house. I didn’t want to bring her there.”
Chloe felt her face flush red at his answer. He’d known exactly what she was really asking. Was she that transparent?
In her peripheral vision she noticed Grady buttering his corn on the cob. Harper sat next to him, rocking Amelie in her arms. “Mom’s a great cook,” Harper said, desperately trying to keep a dialogue going.
Chloe decided that she may as well get the darn elephant out of the room. “How is Taryn?” she asked politely.
“I don’t know,” Jack answered, his face expressionless.
“You don’t know?” Chloe felt confused.
“I left her.”
“But…the baby…” Chloe trailed off, thinking the worst.
Gwen stood very suddenly. “Okay, everyone to the kitchen. We’ll have dessert in there. Just leave the dishes for now.” Then she said to them, “Jackson and Chloe, you stay right here and have some privacy.”
Grady protested, “I’m not finished,” he said, clueless to the tension in the air.
Harper grabbed his arm. “You can finish in the kitchen.”
Everyone shuffled out and as the swinging door closed, Chloe heard Sydney holler, “Give him hell, Chloe.”
Jack didn’t smile—not even a hint of mirth at Sydney’s comment.
Now they had the privacy they needed, with no more awkward conversations to distract them—or to hide behind. Chloe missed her firmly closed and bolted door as protection between them. She longed for the safety of her peephole to act as a barrier. Even the cell phone option of ignore was no longer at her disposal. She felt exposed, laid bare.
Jack wanted her attention—and now he had it. He’d gone to great lengths for an audience with her.
“Why all the subterfuge, Jack?”
He shrugged. “I tried to call a few times. I even stopped by your house on several occasions. I figured out pretty quickly that you didn’t want to see me. Not that I blame you.”
She didn’t know he’d come by the house more than once. “I wasn’t avoiding you.” Yes, I was. I didn’t take any of his phone calls. No wonder he thinks I don’t want to see him. “I’ve just been keeping myself busy. Under the circumstances, I thought it was for the best.”
“To be honest, with everything that’s happened, I wasn’t positive you’d want to see me. This seemed like the logical solution. I thought maybe a group setting might be easier on you. No pressure and all that. Harper and Sydney said they’d get you here. I guess it’s a bit over the top, but I needed to see you, to talk to you. I’ll understand if you’d prefer to leave.”
Chloe swallowed. He’d left Taryn and he wanted to speak with her. This could only be good news. So why was he so grave, so
downcast? “I’d like to hear what you have to say.”
He breathed in and out deeply. “Thank you.”
“The baby?” she couldn’t help but ask.
“There is no baby, Chloe,” he said, a slight break in his voice. “I haven’t told everyone yet. Only Mom knows.”
Her heart skipped a beat. That explained his resigned air and the haunted look on his face. She understood his pain. “I’m so sorry, Jack. Miscarriages are tough, especially with how far along she was and…”
“She didn’t lose the baby,” he stated tightly, an edge to his voice.
Chloe’s thoughts whirled out of control and mental images of Taryn wafted through her mind. For being horribly morning sick, she’d certainly looked just as beautiful as ever.
And she’d wanted Jack back.
Chloe quickly put two and two together, her heart suddenly racing in her chest, banging against her ribs wildly. “She lied about the baby just to get you back, didn’t she? I can’t believe she did that to you. That’s beyond cruel.” Chloe stood, unable to sit any longer. “She can’t play with people’s lives like that. Who does she think she is? What gives her the right to act like life is a silly little game she’d like to win? I’d like to give her a piece of my mind and tell her what I think of…”
Jack didn’t respond. An expression she’d never seen on his face prevailed—and she couldn’t read him. He ran his hands over his face tiredly, his stubble much heavier than usual, as if he hadn’t shaved in several days.
Embarrassed at her outburst, she said, “Sorry, I’m not helping. Are—are you okay?” Clearly he wasn’t.
In answer, he slowly shook his head, meaning no.
Taryn’s lies had temporarily ended her relationship with him and the thought made her livid. Still, this news meant there was nothing to keep them from each other. So what’s the problem? Was he really worried she wouldn’t take him back? Technically, they’d never broken up.
“She didn’t lie about the baby, Chloe,” he said slowly, his face pale. “I suspected that scenario for awhile, but…no.”
Chloe felt a chill run up her spine. “What happened, Jack?”
“I tried. I really tried,” he said resignedly. “But it was obvious to her that I was only there because of the baby. When she realized there was no hope of the two of us getting back together she…” Emotion got the best of him and he paused.