The Devil's Eyes

by Jennifer Loren

  “I’ll get him,” Exie said racing Nicky out of the room as he becomes hysterical.

  Left alone, I feel the need to look for someone- anyone- but all I can see are blurry stares. “Kayla, are you okay?” Dwayne said.

  Grateful for a familiar face, I grip hold of him and whimper, “No.” Dwayne quickly escorts me out of the room and as soon we reach a safe place out of sight and out of earshot of everyone, I break down crying hysterically on Dwayne’s shoulder. Curling up in bed, I release the tension that has been building since the start of this day and let go of the pain I have held onto so desperately in order to go on. “Nick … Nick, you said you would never leave me. You promised, Nick!” I cry out. A comforting hand slowly pulls me close, “Nick?”

  “No … Ryan.”

  “I’m sorry. I ruined everything. I tried, Ryan, but I …”

  “It’s okay. This is even better. You look like the weak, grieving widow like we wanted. Besides, no one would have expected for you to have acted much differently. Hell, I nearly fell out of my chair.” Ryan pushes my hair from my face and kisses my head, “It is going to be okay.”

  Ryan stays with me until the doctor comes and gives me something to calm me down. The medicine helps me fall asleep peacefully, sleeping soundly for the first time in awhile. Instead of the nightmares that have typically forced their way in on me lately, tonight is soothing and comfortable. I can almost feel Nick next to me. This is our room, our bed, and no other place could make me feel him more. I know he is here. Believing it to be true, I reach out for him, “Nick.” I know he’s here and I have to make him stay. “I love you, Nick.” Suddenly, I can feel my cheek heat up from his breath, “Kiss me,” I whispered. “Kiss me.” The want is becoming too much, “A Prince is suppose to kiss the one he loves, to save her.” His presence becomes stronger and I feel his lips touch mine tenderly. Quickly, I reach out and take hold of him before he can leave me again. “Don’t leave me, I need you. I want you.” I run my bare leg up his, finding his hand and sliding it up my thigh, kissing his lips and face. “Make love to me.”

  “No, Kayla.” He whispered.

  I smile, “I know you want to. I want you, Nick, I want to feel you inside me. I want to feel secure in your arms again.”

  “Kayla, I love you but you need to go on without me.” I shake my head. “Why did you come back here, Kayla?”

  “I want to kill him.” I said defiantly.

  “That’s not why. Why, Kayla?”

  Gasping, I pull him close and cry against his cheek. “Oh, Nick, you can’t be gone. You can’t be. You promised you would never leave me. You promised to take care of me.” I try to speak more but all I can do is cry.

  “Oh, Kayla, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry but they were going to get me eventually and it is better that you didn’t see it happen. I want you to move on. Forget about me.” He said trying to slide away from me.

  “NO! No, Nick! Don’t you leave me, you owe me. You owe me the life I was supposed to have … remember? You have to stay with me because you owe me.”

  “I will always be with you. I love you. I would do anything for you, but I can’t come back.”

  “Then make love to me. You can do that, you’re right here.” I said sliding my top off, pushing my panties down my legs, and opening my eyes slightly to see his dark eyes staring back at me. “I … love … you.” I whispered slowly, nearly losing my breath seeing his eyes again.

  “Close your eyes, Kayla. I don’t want you waking up before we are done.” He said running his hand down my face as I close my eyes. His warm lips press softly against mine, he takes hold of my body as he lets me feel all of his. His hand follows his lips down my neck and to my breasts where I feel his tongue vibrate with his moan against the hardness of my nipples. Reaching deep down his back, I hold his heated moans against my navel … my thigh, “Don’t open your eyes, Kayla, or I will go away.” I nod and he moves into me, pushing inside me with a gasping groan. Taking hold of the bed frame behind me, I arch my back pushing into him more. He moves slowly, caressing my body with every motion, kissing me with every moan. “How do you feel?” He whispered against my ear.

  “Incredible. Don’t stop. You feel so good. I love how you feel, how you smell … and ohhh … how you hold me. You do everything right, Nick.” He pulls my legs up around him, takes hold of my ass, and jerks my hips up into him. Working into me with purpose, he sends me backwards deep into my pillow, wreathing and moaning for him. With one last charge of excitement, I let go and come with a heavy moan while Nick holds tight to me. I begin to feel him leave me, “Nick?”

  “Close your eyes, Kayla. Don’t worry, I’m still here.” He kisses me again, laying me back down and holding me tight. “I love you, Princess.”

  ~33~

  Kayla

  Alone, I wake up to a bright sun. I slept perfectly and my dreams of Nick now give me a reason to look forward to my dreams every night. Hearing Nicky cry, I jump up and find my clothes on the ground by the bed. Wow, that was some dream. Still a little lightheaded, I sit down for a second before trying again.

  “Kayla, are you … whoa. Sorry” Ryan said barging into the room.

  “Don’t you know how to knock?” I yell at him.

  Ryan fights a smile as he looks away from me. “I said I was sorry. What are you doing naked anyway? I put you to bed fully clothed.”

  “I took some off as soon as you left and then … I’m not sure, I must have gotten hot.”

  “Uh huh. Hot. I bet.” He said sarcastically.

  I glare at him as he snickers obnoxiously. “What do you want anyway?”

  “I came to see if you heard Nicky, I didn’t know if I should get him or not.” He said vibrating as he holds back his laughter.

  “Well, why don’t you go ahead while I get dressed rather than standing there being an ass?”

  “Okay. Oh, and, Kayla, … your panties are over there.” He said pointing to them hanging off the side of the chest. “You must have been smoking hot.” He laughed.

  “Get out!” I yelled throwing a pillow at him. I rush to get dressed and make Nicky’s breakfast before Ryan has a chance to come down with him. I take Nicky from him as soon as he enters the room, ignoring his annoying smile. All through breakfast he watches me but I continue to ignore him.

  Ryan leans across the table at me, “Kayla?” I look away from him. “Kayla.” Huffing, I look over at him and his stupid smile. “I wanted to ask you something.”

  “What is it?” I asked impatiently.

  “Was it good?” He asked with a cocky smile.

  “Was what good?”

  “You know … your hot night.” He laughs.

  “Best sex I have ever had, jerk!” I huffed.

  “Really? Wow. Maybe you can teach me something.” He continued to laugh.

  “Ryan, why would I have sex with you when I can enjoy myself so much more alone?” I smile forcefully.

  “Ouch. Okay then, but let me know if you change your mind- or, you know, if you need new batteries or something.”

  “You are so annoying sometimes.” I said growling at him.

  “Oh, but you are such a joy.” He said sitting back in his chair, rolling his eyes.

  “Ass,” I whispered.

  “Bitch,” he whispered back.

  “Uggghhh,” I stomped startling Nicky.

  “See what you did? It’s all right, Nicky. Mommy has anger issues but I think we can get her some help for that.”

  “Don’t you have somewhere to be?” I asked him.

  “As a matter of fact, I do. Thanks for the lovely breakfast, but next time I prefer some eggs rather than squished apricots and bananas.” He said glancing at the label of Nicky’s baby food. “Have a good day, dear.” I fake a smile for him and go on about my day.

  ~

  Today I am meeting with clients, establishing my new role. I begin nervously. Lionel, the man Ryan hired to drive me, is not helping me much either. Tanner would at least talk to
me, tell me some stupid story that had no relevance to anything to take my mind off of my troubles. I try to learn more about him. To break the ice, I tell him a joke. He doesn’t laugh, he doesn’t even smile. He simply nods and comments on how funny it is before he put up the window between us. We are not off to the best of starts.

  The first client I meet with is giving us the most trouble. He feeds us crucial information when we need to find special items for other clients. Banister Auckland handles all the items coming through customs, some of which may be drugs, but usually its priceless artwork, cars, jewelry- just about everything you could imagine comes through him. We need him and he knows it. Auckland is demanding to be paid what he had been with Nick, only stating numbers that are nowhere near what he was making. The fool somehow believes that I would come here unprepared. During his rants I sit back and wait for him to calm which makes him angrier. Auckland rages and spouts off crazy demands but, in the end, states that if he doesn’t get them he is going to work with Estrella and Dawson. I had a feeling this is what he was going to do and I’m prepared and confident, which shocks him, throwing him slightly off his plan. I stand with a simple sigh as he watches me slide my gloves on. “Let me tell you something, Mr. Auckland,” I said leaning down into his face. “You either take this deal or nothing- and- by nothing- I mean I will tear you apart and feed you to my dogs.” He is taken aback at first but then begins to laugh at me. I stand back from him and laugh as I take out the knife Nick gave me and then plunge it down into his hand. “How about we start with this finger here?” I asked. Unrelenting from the pressure, I push down into his hand.

  Screaming, “You fucking bitch!”

  “That’s right! Now tell everyone you know this bitch is taking over!” After my negotiation, Auckland agrees that I am right about everything and assures me that he will be happy to help me in any way he can. One thing I learned from Nick is there are times for negotiation and there are times to be heard.

  ~

  My next day begins the same way. This morning, though, I bring Lionel a couple of muffins. He almost smiles but I still can’t get him to talk to me. However, it does take him a few seconds longer to put up the window between us. Today’s clients are less frustrating for some reason. I assume it is because Dwayne and Ryan are standing at my back, looking ever so intimidating.

  Another day starting similarly to the two prior, but with a slight change- chocolate chip cookies that no one can resist. I bounce out handing my nicely decorative bag to Lionel with a cheerful smile as he opens the car door for me. “How is your day so far, Lionel?” I asked.

  “Fine, Ma’am.”

  Frustrated, I wait to get in the car until I can think of something, “Lionel, do you not like me?”

  “I like you fine, Ma’am.” He said motioning me into the car.

  “Then why is it you won’t hardly speak a word to me?” I ask as he sighs.

  “Mr. Ryan said I shouldn’t encourage you to speak too much because of your illness.”

  “My illness?” I asked.

  “Yes, your brain disease that affects your ability to make sense after speaking for long periods of time.” He said waving me in to the car.

  That son of a bitch! “I do not have a disease.” I said forcefully.

  “Then your jokes are you making sense?” He asked curiously.

  “Funny, Lionel. Keep it up and I’m not bringing you cookies tomorrow.” I said sliding into the car.

  “Yes, Ma’am.” He said with a smile.

  My last day of client meetings and I have saved our political connections for last. I have some trouble at first, but once I start clearly noting their flaws and secrets the decision is easy for them. All except for one who thinks he is going to threaten me. While Dwayne and Ryan wait outside, this asshole thinks he has the upper hand and takes advantage.

  “You know Nick always had the best taste in women and you are one his finest I do believe.” He said, pushing me up against a wall and looking me over. “I tell you what, I will give you what you want for the same price. But now I want a free fuck for every deal. What do you say, Kayla?” I smile as he gets excited. “Yea, you like that, don’t you?” He asked rubbing against me.

  “No, not really.” I said knocking his hand away from my waist and elbowing him in the face, sending him down into the floor. I press my spiked heel down deep into his crotch, enjoying his screams. Dwayne and Ryan rush in with guns drawn. “I got it.” I said simply.

  “No shit.” Ryan said, nodding towards Dwayne.

  “You have three seconds to apologize.” I said waiting for him to stop crying about the pain. “Three … two …”

  “I’m SORRY! SORRY! I was wrong, whatever you want!”

  “Good enough, I guess.” I pull my heel out and kneel down to him, “You should respect women more. You never know when one might cut off your little weenie there. I tell you what if you do well for me then I will see about getting one of my girls to teach you all you need to know about women. It will be quite enjoyable for you. Probably not so much for her, but that’s the downside of the job sometimes. Otherwise, I will personally hunt you down and jerk you off until your dick falls off- and I do mean that literally. What do you say?” He nods still clutching his crotch with both hands. “Good, I am so happy we could come to a reasonable agreement.” I said walking out happily.

  ~

  When I get home, I walk into the house and dance with excitement until Ryan comes running in, wrapping his arms around me, “You were amazing today! Amazing, Kayla!”

  “It felt so good but I couldn’t have done it without you and Dwayne standing with me.” I said taking the glass of wine from his hand.

  “No, you would have been fine without us. Your strength is beyond anything I have ever seen.” He said looking me over in awe.

  “Strength? That’s right, I owe you.” I said, punching him.

  “Ow! What the hell was that for?” He said rubbing his arm.

  Glaring at him, “Lionel told me what you said to him …” Ryan looks as if he knows nothing of what I am taking about. “My speaking disease?” He suddenly begins laughing hysterically. “Not funny at all. I thought the man hated me. I baked him muffins and cookies to get him to talk to me.” Ryan laughs harder forcing me to hit him again.

  “Ow! Come on! That’s hilarious.” Ignoring him, I cross my arms and turn away from him. He reaches out to me and kisses my cheek. “You’re cute when you’re angry. But, you might want to be careful, you don’t want to aggravate your condition.” He laughs.

  I turn around quickly watching him run, “Damn it, Nick!” I yell towards him, immediately regretting it.

  Ryan’s good mood dwindles quickly. He walks over to me, and takes hold of my face, “I’m not Nick, Kayla!”

  “I know.”

  “I don’t think you do. I have seen you watching me. Looking at me as if I can fill his place. That’s not why I am here. Nick is gone, Kayla. He is gone and I am here. When this is all over, he isn’t going to come back. There is only going to be me. Are you going to be able to deal with that?” Ryan asked breaking me with every second that I stare into his eyes.

  “I know all that. It slipped. I am used to saying his name when I am ...” I tensed, trying to break free of him.

  “No, you listen to me. I promised Nick I would take care of you and I am going to make sure I keep that promise, but I am not going to be his replacement. I know you are still grieving for him and I am okay with that, but if you think you can ever look at me and not see him … I would like to try to make you happy too.” Ryan kisses my cheek but lingers along my lips and brushes against them softly. “I want to kiss you so bad it is driving me insane.” His lips stay within an easy distance. All I have to do is take hold of them. I move slightly and he makes the move for me, taking my lips within his, caressing me softly, and holding me close. I run my hand up his chest, feeling his muscles, tasting his lips, and enjoying the closeness. Opening my eyes, I look into his and,
for an instant, I see Nick and moan. He stops suddenly, “One day you’re going to see me. And only me!” He lets go of me with obvious frustration, kicking one of Nicky’s toys out of his way as he leaves the room.

  Seeking comfort, I go into Nicky’s room and find him already becoming cranky from the yelling. I pick him up from his bed and notice a new stuffed animal that he holds close to him. “Where did you get this? What is this? A donkey?” I hold him up and see his name engraved on his hind end, “Eeyore.” Nicky frustratingly takes him back with a whimper. “Okay, he’s yours. Damn you’re cranky tonight. You have been sleeping for hours. What has gotten into you today?” Rocking him back to sleep, I think of Ryan and all that he has done for us and wonder if I could ever see myself giving into him. It feels so good in his arms, but I wonder if it is because I miss Nick so much or if I feel something for Ryan. As I rock Nicky, I admire the rocking horse sitting beautifully across the room and wonder where Nick bought such an expertly crafted piece. Nick did have a love for well crafted wood furniture. I wonder if he bought it … or didn’t buy it? I put Nicky and Eeyore back to bed and take a closer look at the rocking horse. Hidden beneath the horses mane is a signature, Aiden Bourghesie. Nick made me believe his uncle was dead. Why would he do that? What was he hiding? Rushing to my room, I search for the key that Nick offered to Luke but cannot find it. A2325, that was it, I know it. I am his wife, I should be entitled to what is in there- key or no key.

  ~34~

  Kayla

  Lionel drives me to the storage facility that I once visited with Nick. I hope this is the right one. Walking into the office, I greet a solemn manager that has little interest in helping me. “Hi, my husband … I mean, my late husband, had a storage unit here but I am unable to find the key. Can you help me out, by chance?”