The Sweet By and By

by Sara Evans

  “It’s all over the locker room. He took the scholarship. He’ll be road-tripping to NIU with Hartline this weekend.”

  “You’re lying, Aiden.”

  “Why would I lie, Jade-o?”

  “Don’t come in here all holy and mighty, Saint Aiden, and rain on my world. Dustin wouldn’t leave without telling me.”

  His wife.

  “Whatever, take it up with him. Are you playing cards or not? It’s your turn.”

  “I don’t want to play.”

  She’d tried during school today to talk to Dustin, but a net of emotion trapped her words.

  Willow thundered back out to the porch. “Dustin wants to talk to you.”

  Jade jumped from the swing. “He called?”

  Willow hung on the porch rail, gazing down the road. “Don’t see him standing here, do you?”

  “You watch too much television, Wills.” Jade steered her sister back inside and picked up the living room portable. “Hey, where are you?”

  “I’m at Hartline’s house.” Booming voices trampled over his.

  “Hartline?” Ben Hartline, the one going on the supposed road trip. He was a burly defensive end who thought a good time was shooting BBs at dogs and cats. “You’re supposed to be here, picking me up.”

  “I was planning on it, believe me, but . . .” His voice faded like he’d dropped the mouthpiece below his chin. “Hey, don’t start the film without me . . . Jade, Coach gave us film of Mid Prairie. We’re ordering pizza, going over their plays and key players. If we beat them, it’s Division for us.”

  “Colter,” a bass voice interrupted. “Cut the ball and chain and let’s goooo. Daylight’s burning. Did anyone order the pizzas?”

  “Ignore Brill . . . you know how he gets when he’s hungry.” Dustin’s laugh burned her ear like a hot prairie wind.

  “Is that funny? Calling me a ball and chain?” Brill was another player with a bit too much Animal House going on.

  “He’s had a few too many.”

  “Too many? Are you drinking, Dust?” She hated drinking. Observed too many of Mama’s parties to see any use for alcohol.

  “No.” His tone was defensive.

  Jade debated. Back off or push? Let him do his football thing now, then press him later with the questions burning in her heart? Forces beyond her control threatened her happiness, so she’d best be wise, think this thing through.

  For now, she had to trust his pledge. His promise of forever.

  “Don’t be mad, Jade. This is my last high-school football season. I want to have fun, make it count. Most of us have played together since Pop Warner.”

  “I’m sorry, but I am mad. Football buddies or not.” Jade lowered her voice. “I’m your wife, and I haven’t seen you for four days, Dustin.”

  “So I can’t hang with my friends my senior year? Maybe Brill had it right . . . the old ball and chain.”

  The words smacked. This wasn’t happening. Jade jumped from the sofa and stood in the middle of the living room. “A ball and chain you begged to wear. Now you’re acting like an immature—”

  Jade caught Willow glancing up from her circle of Barbies, eyes rounded and scared. She flashed her a smile. “Willow, why don’t you go grab me a Diet Coke, okay?”

  “Is that still Dustin? On the phone?” She pushed up from the floor, a Barbie trapped in each hand.

  “Everything’s okay. We’re just working something out. Go on now. And get me a cup of ice.” When she disappeared, Jade fired the rest of her thought into the phone. “Jerk. An immature jerk. And now you’ve got Willow upset.”

  “Me? You’re the one going off.”

  “Because my husband”—she clenched her teeth—“is avoiding me.”

  “No, I’m trying to make everyone happy, including you.”

  “Including yourself.” Jade snapped on the end table lamp. A V-beam fell across the end of the sofa.

  “Jade, look, Sunday I’m all yours.”

  “Sunday? What about tomorrow night’s game? And all day Saturday? We were going to study, then go to the movies.” Since the first game of the season, they’d developed a tradition: dinner at Dairy Queen with their gang after Friday night’s game, then hauling off to be alone, curling up in the bed of his truck until Granny’s curfew.

  “Some of the guys want to drive up to Cedar Falls after the game to check out Northern Iowa.”

  “Did you accept the scholarship?” She was losing all firepower.

  “Let’s talk on Sunday, okay? Jade, it’s good, I promise. I’ve got a plan.”

  Willow crept across the living room, carefully placing one foot in front of the other, balancing a Diet Coke can and a tall, very full cup of ice, her Barbies tucked under her arms.

  “Plan? You have a plan? What happened to our plan? You made promises to me, Dustin.” Jade cradled the phone against her shoulder and reached to help her sister.

  “Hey, don’t be like—” A high, rolling laugh filled Jade’s ear from Dustin’s end of the phone line. “Looky here, it’s Kendall-wendall.”

  “Kendall’s there?”

  “Of course—she’s Hartline’s sister,” Dustin said with a tussle in his voice. “His ugly-mugly sister.”

  “Look who’s calling who ugly, Colter.” More tussling with laughter.

  Jade sank to the edge of the coffee table. Kendall Hartline was beauty defined. Not cheerleader plastic as in Shannon Bell, but an athletic, strong, barefaced beauty with sleek dark-brown hair that glistened like a Pantene commercial.

  “Hey—” Feeling very beige and nagging, Jade deployed a new tactic. “Why don’t I come over, bring brownies and ice cream?”

  School rumor was that Kendall had had a crush on Dustin since last spring. Jade put Rachel on it, but the most reliable sources clammed up whenever she went snooping.

  “Ah, thanks, Jade, but this is a team thing. Besides, they don’t . . . you know . . . know about us, and it’ll just look like I’m whipped.”

  “Dustin, hang up. Jade, give the boy some breathing room,” a host of male tenors chimed in.

  Jade slammed the phone to the base, her hands icy and moist. She was losing him. Dustin had convinced himself after his junior year that he’d missed out on a wrestling scholarship.

  Then in October, the future he never imagined knocked on his door.

  It made sense now. He wanted to go to college next fall. Wrestle at college level. Jade wondered if he’d seized this opportunity like all the others, like he seized her. Only this time, going for what he wanted had a catch.

  A wife.

  “Willow, Granny will be home any minute.” Jade started for the kitchen, her untouched Diet Coke still fizzing in the glass. “Stay inside and watch TV. Unless Aiden is ready to take you to church.” Where’d she put her book bag with her wallet? “Don’t light candles or the fireplace . . . just don’t play with matches at all.”

  “Where are you going?” Willow turned from her row of Barbie dolls that toppled every which way on the floor.

  “To take care of something.”

  “Are you mad at Dustin?”

  Jade walked across the room and kissed her sister’s hair, smoothing her cheek with her hand. “Don’t worry about Dustin and me, okay? We’re together forever.”

  Snatching Paps’ truck keys from the hook, Jade burst out the back door, jogging toward the barn. The crisp evening cleared her thoughts, cooled her emotions. Everything was going to be fine . . . just fine.

  Backing down the driveway, Jade figured she couldn’t very well drive to Hartline’s. Even she’d be embarrassed to show up while the team watched game film. So she drove to the next best place, the home of her heart for the past year: the Colters’.

  The golden glow of the living room light falling through the windows welcomed Jade, soothing her angst as she rang the doorbell and lined up her toes along the line where light sliced the darkness.

  “Jade, you have a sixth sense,” Mrs. Colter said when she answered the do
or. “I’m just about to take a cake out of the oven.” The cropped-haired brunette was fragrant with flour and vanilla. “Come in, come in. I guess you know Dustin’s off with the team.”

  “I thought I’d wait for him here, if you don’t mind.”

  “Don’t be silly. I could use some girl talk.” Mrs. Colter shuffled Jade into the kitchen with her arm around her shoulders. Jade discarded her anxiety as she walked by the curio cabinet stuffed with Precious Moments figurines and framed pictures of gaped-tooth Dustin and his sister. “What’s new with you these days?”

  “School mostly. Still working for Mr. Wimple. He gave me a raise.” Jade perched on the counter stool, tugging her jacket sleeves down over her hands.

  “Good for you, Jade sweetie. So—” Mrs. Colter turned from the oven with a cake pan in her mitted hands. “What do you think of our boy getting a scholarship? Rowdy and I are so proud. We overindulged Sydney when she wanted a fairy-tale wedding three years ago and we still haven’t recovered. Then she got pregnant, and Blain got hurt on the job—” Mrs. Colter dumped the cake upside down on a plate and hovered her hand over the white sponge. “Gotta let it cool a bit. We were so concerned Dustin wouldn’t be able to go to college.”

  “Yeah, it’s exciting. I’m proud of him.” Jade rubbed her thumb over the gold flecks of the countertop, afraid to look up. Dustin had never talked about wanting college very much. But Jade was beginning to realize how much he wanted to go.

  “Oh, honey, are you crying? Don’t worry, there are plenty of fish in the sea.” Mrs. Colter came around to squeeze her shoulder. “Dustin’s not the only man in the world. You’ll be the queen of PCM high school next year and forget all about him.” She winked.

  “E-excuse me?” What was Mrs. C talking about?

  “I guess I should let you know Dustin told us, honey.”

  “W-what did he tell you?” About them being married? No, she said something about Dustin not being the only man in the world.

  “Well, that you two broke up.” Mrs. Colter touched the cake with the tip of her finger, then opened the lower cupboard by the oven, her voice all sad. “I know it’s hard, but I think you two did a wise thing.” She plopped a mixing bowl on the granite counter. “There’s nothing like your first true love. Rowdy and I understand that, but the world is different today. It’s best for kids to break apart, and if it’s right, they’ll find their way back.”

  “Right, take a break.” Jade jerked her claddagh ring from her finger, her eyes blurring the edge of the counter with the far wall of the kitchen. What had she done? Why did she listen to Dustin . . . trust him? Stupid, stupid girl.

  “But he said you two were still best friends.” Mrs. Colter unwound the cord of her hand mixer, smiling at Jade. “I’m impressed, sweetie. If Rowdy had broken off with me in high school, I’d have dented his car and slashed his tires.”

  Don’t tempt me. Then the walls of the room inched closer, closing her in. Jade’s pulse surged and her breathing got shallow, and it was as if she were all alone in the world.

  Sitting in the cozy, bright kitchen, alone. Jade gripped the counter, afraid she’d topple off the stool. Her heart beat so hard the edge of her top fluttered.

  Mrs. Colter gathered ingredients—powdered sugar, vanilla, Crisco—her lips moving, yet Jade’s ears were filled with the sound of her own blood.

  After an eternity of seconds, the walls of the room inched back into place. Jade breathed, deeper and longer, and her white-knuckled grip on the counter eased to pink. The rushing sound ebbed from her head.

  “Carla, what is that heavenly smell?” Mr. Colter crossed the kitchen smiling and kissed Jade on the cheek, ruffling her hair. “Don’t tell me, I’ve figured it out. It’s Jade.”

  “Stop bothering my help, Rowdy.” Mrs. Colter reached over and smoothed Jade’s hair into place, then turned her husband toward the living room. “I’ll bring you a piece of cake when it’s ready.”

  “How are you, Mr. Colter?” Jade felt watery and weak.

  “Good, now that you’re here.”

  And now that you are here. The resonance of his voice comforted her.

  “Hurry with that cake, Carla.” Mr. Colter winked at Jade with a crinkly blue eye and patted his flat belly. “The diet gurus say you shouldn’t eat too late at night.”

  “And what do you know about dieting, Rowdy?” Mrs. Colter pressed her hand over Jade’s and peered into her eyes. “You are always welcome here. We just love you, and who knows?” The woman smiled. “You and Dustin might find your way back to each other one day.”

  The kitchen door flew open and an energetic, laughing Dustin burst into the kitchen with the bubbly and brunette Kendall draped over his back.

  “Are you sure your mom won’t mind?” She was trying to cover his eyes with her hands.

  “No, Mom won’t mind. She loves you.” Dustin grabbed her hands, hooking them over his shoulders and to the front of his chest. He smacked his mother’s cheek with a kiss. “Mom, we’re going to—”

  When his gaze fell on Jade, it took several seconds for Dustin to exhale her name. “Jade.”

  It took all her courage to hold his gaze, but she broke after a few seconds. Kendall’s presence made Jade feel bland and beige, like she was a boring piece of kitchen furniture. Absently, Jade smoothed her hair, licked her dry lips, and squared her shoulders.

  “Kendall, look at you, all this long, gorgeous hair. I’d kill to have hair like yours.” Mrs. Colter popped open the fridge for the jug of milk. “Jade, isn’t it gorgeous?”

  “Yes, gorgeous.” Her eyes met Dustin’s.

  “Sit, you two. The cake will be ready in a few minutes. As soon as I mix up the icing, Jade will spread it over the cake, and then I’m cutting big slices.” Mrs. Colter buoyed around the kitchen like the popular mom she was. All the kids liked her kitchen.

  “I told you I’d see you Sunday,” Dustin said into Jade’s ear as he leaned over the counter.

  She gripped the front of his PCM letter jacket, rising up until her nose almost touched his. “You’re a liar.”

  “About what?”

  “Hey, what are you two whispering about? Kendall, can you find the electric beaters in that drawer over there?”

  Jade’s jaw tightened as her limbs started to tremble. “Everything.”

  “Dust, so what are you guys planning on tonight?” Mrs. Colter asked, ignoring the exchange between her son and Jade.

  “Kendall’s never seen Strange Brew.” Dustin backed away, holding his hands wide, as if daring Jade to challenge him.

  “Really? Good. You know, Dad’s always dying to show a movie on his new projection screen. Oh, that thing makes me seasick. I have to watch from the basement steps.”

  Pain burned the base of Jade’s throat. Strange Brew. The make-out movie. Dustin popped it in the video player for their sixth date. She quickly became bored with the antics of Bob and Doug and surrendered to Dustin’s sweet kisses and caresses.

  “The guys call it the make-out movie . . . ,” he’d confessed, driving her home. “Most girls don’t last past the opening scene.”

  “Oh, really?”

  “First time I’ve tried it, though.”

  “I cleaned the basement today too.” Mrs. Colter fired up the beaters and whipped together the contents of her bowl. “Jade, are you staying to watch? You’ve seen the movie, though, haven’t you?”

  “Actually, no, Mrs. Colter.” And please, shut up. All was not right with the world, no matter how cheery she tried to make it. Jade shifted her weight; the tops of her thighs had started to ache from leaning on the rim of the hardtop stool.

  Kendall stood tucked in the corner between the fridge and the door. The only sound was the whir of the mixer and beaters bumping against the bowl.

  Jade waited. She wanted him to do something, drag her off to his room and explain. Tell her he was sorry, he’d lost his mind for a moment, then lock the door and lay her back on his bed.

  “Well, well, ther
e’s another pretty girl in my kitchen. Must be my lucky night.”

  Kendall waved from her chicken-liver hiding place. “Hey, Mr. C.”

  “Carla, how about that cake?” Rowdy thumped the counter by Jade with his palms, grinning down at her.

  “Hold your horses, it’s coming. Rowdy, why don’t you set up the TV for Dust? He and Kendall want to watch a movie.”

  “When I come back, I want to see a big slice of cake right here.” He jabbed his finger on the granite, demonstrating where he expected to see a plate of cake, then elbowed Jade. “You’re staying for the show too?”

  “We spoke vows, Dustin.” The confession simply came, as if the words were destined to be said. Jade slipped off the stool, her chest rising and falling with each shallow breath.

  The mixer went silent. Mrs. Colter’s smile faded.

  “You made a promise to me.” Jade fingered the claddagh ring in her pocket. Blood rushed through her ears again, white-capped with ire. “You promised forever.”

  “Jade.” His voice was flat and firm. “You’re making something out of nothing. It’s a movie.”

  “The make-out movie.”

  “What in the world?” Mrs. Colter glanced from face to face. “Now look, Jade, I know it’s hard when your ex-boyfriend moves on, but—”

  “Husband. He’s my husband, Mrs. Colter. Your son proposed to me, and I said yes. We’re married.”

  “Jade—”

  “Tell her, Dustin.”

  “That’s impossible. You’re underage.”

  “We forged your signatures. Stu was our witness over the age of eighteen.”

  “Oh my land.” Mrs. Colter fell against the counter, hand to her forehead. “Dustin, is it true?”

  “Mom, listen—”

  Mrs. Colter thrust her hand at him. “Give me your keys.”

  “What for?” He scoffed. “You’re taking my truck?”

  “Dustin, hand them over.”

  His cheeks reddened as he dug the keys from his pocket. “Mom, listen, let me—”

  Mrs. Colter tore the keys from his hand and slapped them into Kendall’s. “Go on home, Kendall. Give us a chance to smooth this out. And please, don’t talk about this. It’s a private, family matter.”