Susan Clegg and Her Neighbors' Affairs

by Anne Warner

  Mrs. Lathrop had been dumbfounded to see a horse and wagon being driveninto her neighbor's yard a little before noon one warm spring day. Hereyesight was not good enough to identify the horse's driver, but shehung breathlessly in her kitchen window and peered gaspingly out uponhis boldness and daring during the whole four minutes that it took himto hitch to a clothes-pole; and then, when the fell deed wasaccomplished, she watched him go in by the kitchen door, and waited,with a confidence born of a very good understanding of her neighbor'sviews as to driving in and hitching, to see him cast ignominiously forthby Miss Clegg.

  But even that omniscience of a friend's habits which may be acquiredduring a next-door residence for years sometimes fails, and Mrs.Lathrop, after an hour of more or less active bobbing in the window thatcommanded the best view of the rear of the house on the other side ofthe fence, was forced to see that the caller, whoever he might be, wasnot cast forth, and a further hour's attention showed that he did notquit the premises either just before or just after dinner. When Mrs.Lathrop had quite settled the last point to her complete satisfactionand un-understanding, she decided to give up watching and to go to sleepas usual. She slept until four in the afternoon, and when she awoke andhurried to the window the horse and wagon were gone. Susan seemed gonetoo, for her house looked very shut up and sounded more than silent. SoMrs. Lathrop went back forthwith to her chair and slept again, and thenext time she awakened it was her friend's voice that awakened her, asthe latter stood over her and demanded briskly,

  "Well, did you see him?"

  "I--oh--oh--I--" began Mrs. Lathrop, vaguely.

  "I thought you could n't but see him," said Susan, "hitchin' his horseto one o' my clothes-poles as large as life. If it 'd been any day inhis life but this one I 'd surely of told him frank 'n' open my views onhitchin' to my clothes-poles, but bein' as it was to-day I only told himmy views on drivin' over my grass."

  "But--" began Mrs. Lathrop.

  "The horse did n't bite the pole," continued Susan; "he said as hewa'n't no cribber. I told him it wa'n't cribs as was the question, butclothes-poles, an' I might of spoken some stronger, but just then hestepped on the edge of the cistern cover 'n' I got such a turn as droveeverythin' else clean out o' my mind. You know how easy it is to turnthat cover, Mrs. Lathrop, 'n' I must say that if he and it had fell intogether there'd have been a fine tale to tell, for the cover alwayssinks straight to the bottom, 'n' is no joke to find 'n' fish up,--youand I both know that. Ever since the brace give way I 've always got iton my mind to keep the clothes-bars sittin' over it, but now the bracein the clothes-bars is give way too 'n' as a consequence they won't sitover nothin' no more. If money was looser I 'd certainly never spare itgettin' them two braces mended, but money bein' tight and me alone inthe house 'n' the most of my callers them as it 's all one to me whetherI see 'em in the parlor or in the cistern, I ain't botherin'. I wasnever one to worry an' scurry unnecessarily, Mrs. Lathrop, an' you knowthat as well as I do, 'n' to-day I had my mind all done up in mycurtains anyway, 'n' I was more'n' a little put out over bein'interrupted, even by a man as come in through the woodshed door, that Inever bolt 'cause it 's a understood thing as woodshed doors is not tobe come in at. The turn he give me when I hear him clutterin' aroun' inthe woodshed!--I thought he was rats, an' then a cat, an' then a rat an'a cat come together, an' then all of a sudden I see him an' rememberedthe cistern cover."

  "But who--" asked Mrs. Lathrop.

  Susan looked surprised.

  "Why, I thought you said you seen him," she said; "you certainly give methat impression, Mrs. Lathrop. I 'd have took any vow anywhere as Iasked you if you seen him 'n' you said you did. It's funny if you didn't for he drove hisself in 'n' hitched hisself too, 'n' me up in thegarret when he done it, foldin' off my curtains to iron. My, to thinkhow I did hate the idea o' ironin' them curtains! Mother always ironedthe curtains. She said I was young n' she did n't mind anyhow. I ain'twashed 'em since. I 've been in the habit o' sayin' I was afraid it'dbring mother over me too much to take 'em down without her. That 's athing as this community can easy understand, f'r they leave all theirhard work layin' around for any reason a tall, and although I can't inreason deny as in most ways they 're as different from me as anythingcan be from me, still when it comes to ironin' curtains the stove is ashot on the just as on the unjust 'n' you can't mention nothin' hotter."

  "Did you--" said Mrs. Lathrop, sympathetically.

  "Well, I sh'd say I did. What I set out to do I always do whether it'scurtains or Mr. Kimball. Mr. Kimball has got a great idea as to hissharpness, but I guess if our sharp ends was under a microscope, he 'dbe the needle an' me the bee-sting most every day. It was too bad youwas n't to that lecture, Mrs. Lathrop,--I did learn a great deal. Notjust about the sting, but some very handy things. It seems if you goamong 'em quietly, they 'll let you take the honey out any time 'n' youcan buy the queens by mail in a box 'n' they 'll lay a whole hive aloneby themselves in no time. Mrs. Macy said she thought some of sendin' forone or two queens 'n' settin' 'em up in business in bushel baskets, butwhen she went home 'n' looked the baskets over 'n' thought what workit'd be to clean the honey out of 'em each fall she give up the idea.She's going to set out a orange tree in a flower pot instead. It says inthe 'Ladies' Home Diary' as they grow very nicely so."

  "But who--" interrupted Mrs. Lathrop, wrinkling up her face somewhatover the long strain on her eager attentiveness.

  "But I thought you said you seen him," said her friend, with a secondrecurrence of her surprised expression; "did n't you see him when yousee him drivin' in? He was holdin' the reins at the big end o' the whip,I should suppose. I can't well see how you saw everythin' else withoutseein' him. He was some better dressed 'n' usual but it just shows whatbein' left a widower does for a man. It seems to somehow put new spiritin 'em 'n' sets 'em to wearin' ties again. Why, do you know when he cometo go he actually asked me to ride a piece with him 'n' show him whichfinger-post to turn in to, an' I will say as, where I would n't ofdreamed o' ridin' with him a week ago, I went to-day an' really enjoyedit. Yes, I did."

  "Was it--" cried Mrs. Lathrop, with a sudden gleam of intuition.

  Susan looked surprised for the third time.

  "Why, of course," she said, "who else could it be?" Then she left herposition near the door, came over nearer to her friend, took a chair andbegan to untie her bonnet.

  "I don't know as I 'm surprised over your bein' surprised, Mrs.Lathrop," she continued in a slightly milder tone after a brief pausefor vocal renovation. "I will confess as I was really nothin' butsurprised myself. I supposed as a matter o' course that to-day he was inMeadville buryin' her, 'n' when I first see him the funeral was sostrong in my mind as I thought he'd druv over to maybe borrow father'sblack bow for his front door. I made my mind right up to tell himstraight to his face as he couldn't have it, for I told you once as Iwas keepin' that bow for you, Mrs. Lathrop, an' when I promise anybodyanythin' I keep my word, whether it's a receipt or a bow for their ownfuneral, an' when I saw old man Ely it didn't take me no two minutes tokeep my word the same as ever,--'n' father's black bow too. But laws, hewas n't after no bow!--I very quickly found out as all as he was afterwas the funeral, f'r it seems as they was uncommonly spry with it. Hetold me right off as they had it pretty prompt too, for he says when itcomes to buryin' a wife there 's no need for a man to go slow, 'n' so hehad all Meadville up with the lark 'n' out after old Mrs. Ely. He seemedto feel all of a sudden as it was a little awkward me not havin' beenthere, but I saw how he felt 'n' made his mind easy by tellin' him frank'n' open that it was n't nothin' agin his wife as kept me here, for whenit come right square down to it I did n't know any one as I 'd enjoytheir funeral more 'n gettin' my curtains ironed; an' I may in truthrepeat to you as that 's so, Mrs. Lathrop, for although it may seem hardat first hearin', still we both know what it is to iron curtains, 'n' mymotto always is as a live lion has rights above a dead dog, and theproverb says as the dead is always ready to bury the dead anyhow. Oldman Ely seemed
to look on it much as I did, for he did n't fiddle aboutnone with his affairs, but came right to the point an' told me fair an'square as, not havin' anythin' particular on hand after it was over, an'seein' clear as he was three miles out of his way anyhow, he 'd thoughthe 'd come on as far as Pete Sanderson's 'n' see about a cow as he 'dheard Pete had, 'n' then after that it looked to him like it was prettymuch a day for odd jobs straight through, so he come over here to getsome graftin's from our grape-vine. He said as father 'd told him onceas he could have some graftin's from the porch-vine if he 'd come andcut 'em, 'n' so he was come. I told him as when it was n't nothin' moreimportant than grape-vines father's words was ever my laws; so he wentout 'n' cut some pieces from the Virginia creeper an' come in perfectlysatisfied, 'n' I may in confidence remark as I was satisfied too for Iwas n't overpleased to have him meddlin' with the porch-vine. I willremark, though, as his cuttin' Virginia creeper for grape-vines didamuse me some, for it's been a well-known fact for years as Mrs. Ely wasMr. Ely in everythin' but the clothes he wore, 'n' they say the way shemanaged to figger-head him through plantin' 'n' harvest, 'n' pasture 'n'punkins, was nothin' short of genius, bred in the bone 'n' bustin' outevery seam.

  "Howsomesoever, he stayed 'n' stayed 'n' I ironed 'n' ironed, 'n' wetalked about the farm 'n' father 'n' how well he remembered father 'n'what a good daughter I was 'n' what a good wife Mrs. Ely was 'n' howwell he was goin' to bear it, 'n' I begun to wonder when he wasintendin' to go or whether he was thinkin' of stayin' all day, 'n' atlast there was nothin' but to ask him to dinner, 'n' I was n't intendin'to have no dinner on a'count o' the curtains. It's a very hard thing,Mrs. Lathrop, when you're not intendin' to have dinner to have to invitecompany for it, but there did n't seem no way to help it. I could n't indecency more than mention as Mrs. Brown was to home an' I knowed as theFishers was give to Irish stew on Tuesdays, but no, sir, there he satlike a bump on a log 'n' in the hind end I could n't but ask him to stay'n' have just cold pork 'n' beans on a'count o' the funeral. 'N' so hestayed. I set my irons back with a heavy heart 'n' said it seemed likesome days misfortunes never come single, for I 'd already seen awater-bug in the kitchen that very mornin'; but he seemed to havedecided to be thick-skinned, so I put on the tea-kettle 'n' brought outthe pork 'n' beans 'n' we sat down to eat."

  "Was--" asked Mrs. Lathrop.

  "Well, I should think he was," replied Susan. "I never see such aappetite. He eat pork 'n' beans like he thought they was twins off avine, 'n' I had to finally get up 'n' clear away to save any a _tall_. Iset the tea-kettle by him 'n' told him to end by havin' all the tea hewanted to pour through the leaves by himself, 'n' I went back to myironin'. He sat there 'n' drank tea very happy for a long spell. Seemedlike it sort o' thawed him out, 'n' finally he begin to talk about_her_, 'n' once he got started on that he never quit. I ironed curtains'n' listened 'n' let him talk. It was n't long afore he begin to showthe disadvantages o' bein' dead, for he said as he was always thepractical one of them both, 'n' he'd never have dared say that with oldMrs. Ely on top of the earth. I was amused at his sayin' it anyhow, withthe Virginia creeper graftin's there in a tomato-can bearin' witnessagin him, but I didn't say nothin'. He asked me if I'd believe as shewas really a very fair-lookin' girl when they was married. I couldn'tbut stop at that 'n' ask him if it was ever possible as her nose wasever any different, 'n' he had to say 'No, not any different;' 'n' I canassure you as he set 'n' rubbed his chin with his hand a long timeafterwards 'n' then drew a big breath 'n' said 'No, not any different.'I felt to respect his feelin's 'n' did n't say nothin', 'n' after awhile he went on an' said that they was very happy married on the whole,'n' then he rubbed his chin with his hand a nother long while 'n' saidover again 'on the whole.' He asked me then if I ever heard how he cameto marry her first 'n' I said as I always hear as it was to get thefarm. He kind of flared up at that 'n' said there never was nothin' aginher but her nose, 'n' at that I took a fresh iron 'n' said he asked me aplain question 'n' I give him a plain answer, which, considerin' hishorse 'n' my clothes-pole 'n' her nose, was all as could in reason beexpected of me. He softened down at that 'n' said as he was n't by nomeans meanin' to make light of his dead wife's nose, 'n' I said as,speakin' o' Mrs. Ely's nose bein' the one thing agin' her, it was thejoy of every other person as met her as it was agin her 'n' not aginthem, for it was a well-known fact as Mr. Kimball had said hunderds oftimes as if he had that nose an' leaned over a bridge 'n' see it in thewater he 'd be willin' to let it overbalance him then 'n' there 'n' bedrowned forever. He got pretty meek at that, for it showed as I was inearnest, 'n' he went on to say as it _was_ large, but he said as aforeshe took to that way of kind o' shrinkin' back of it it did n't look solarge, 'n' anyway she was his married 'n' buried wife. I told him I wascertainly glad to know that, seein' as they 'd lived together so manyyears, 'n' then he said it 'd really be nothin' but a joy to him to tellme how he come to marry her, so I said I 'd listen 'n' welcome 'n' hestarted in.

  "I must say this, Mrs. Lathrop, 'n' that is that I soon see as it waslucky as I was n't feelin' no special call to talk any myself, for heset out in a most steady sort of a discouragin' down-pour, kind ofcross-your-legs 'n' clear-your-throat, 'n' I see as I was in for it 'n'just let him pour, for feelin's catches us all ways 'n' whatever he feltabout old Mrs. Ely it was plain as some one had got to hear it to thelast drop. So I let him drop away, 'n' I will in all fairness say, as amore steady spout I never see no one under. He never seemed to consideras how me or any one might perhaps enjoy to maybe make a remark fromtime to time, 'n' even when he ain't talkin' he 's got that way o'rubbin' his chin as makes it seem most impolite to bu'st in on. I didn'tcare much, though, 'cause I had the curtains, 'n' besides I may inconfidence state as when I really felt to speak I sailed right in anyhow'n' spoke what I wanted to. For I never was one to sit by 'n' have mytail calmly trod on, as you 'n' a great many others knows to your cost,Mrs. Lathrop, 'n' then, too, each time when I see as he was nigh totippin' into the cistern it was really nothin' but a joy to him to knowit in time to hitch away."

  "Did--" said Mrs. Lathrop.

  "In the first place," said Susan, "he asked me if I 'd mind his smokin'his pipe, 'n' I told him I most certainly would, so that ended thatsubjeck right up square at the beginnin'. Then he said he 'd beenmarried nigh on to forty years 'n' I told him to look out for thecistern 'n' he hitched along a piece 'n' begin again. 'N' then he seemedset a-goin' for keeps.

  "Seems, Mrs. Lathrop, as he never had no family, but he says he was avery handsome young fellow for all that. I looked pretty hard at him,but he stuck to it 'n' I let it go. He went on to say as he growed upanyhow 'n' drifted to Meadville when he was long about twenty-four, 'n'went on to the Pearson farm. Oh, my, but he says that was a stony farm!I tell you but he rubbed his chin with his hand a long while afore hesaid all over again, 'but that _was_ a stony farm!' An' thegophers!--Well, he says whatever the Recordin' Angel has got down hebets he's skipped some o' them gophers. He says the hairs on your headis a mere joy to reckon up, 'n' fallin' sparrows too, beside themgophers. He says savin' a cent in the time o' Egypt 'n' seein' what you'd have now if you 'd only done it, is nothin' to the way them gopherson the Pearson farm was give to givin' in marriage. He says as it was avery stony farm, 'n' in between every two stones was one hole 'n' half adozen gophers to a hole, in the _single_ season. He says ploughin' waslike churnin' with nothin' but stones 'n' gophers in the churn. He saysthey was that tame they'd run up your legs 'n' up the horses' legs; hesaid maybe I would n't believe it, 'n' I told him I certainly would n't,so then he went on to another subjeck.

  "He says he used to plough through them gophers all day 'n' court Tillyall night. Tilly was old Mrs. Ely. He says she 'd never been courted ona'count of her nose, but he said he wanted a farm bad enough to bewillin' to never forget to tip his face pretty well crossways. He saysshe was so happy bein' courted that at first it made the gophers justseem like nothin' a tall, 'n' he says as you can't maybe get the fullsense o' that but it's there just the same.
I tell you, Mrs. Lathrop,you can see that man has suffered. I asked him was he afraid of micetoo, 'n' he bristled up pretty sharp 'n' said he wa'n't afraid ofgophers, only they took you so unawares. I had to tell him right thereto look out for the cistern lid, 'n' he hitched over by the table again'n' then he said, Well, so it went all summer. He said he got so tiredo' gophers, 'n' moonlight, 'n' hittin' her nose hard by accident, timeswhen he was n't thinkin', as he was nothin' but glad when September come'round. He says he 'd figgered all along on bein' married in September,'n' he never for one moment mistrusted as he wouldn't be; but he says ofall the awful things to count on, Tilly Pearson was the worst. Oh! my,he says, but she was cranky! 'n' then he rubbed his chin with his hand along while 'n' then said 'cranky,' over again in a very hard tone. Hesays would you believe it that after all his love-makin' along the firsto' September she begin to get terrible uppish 'n' throw her head aroun''n' put on airs 'n' he was just dumbfounded at her goin's on."

  "What--" asked Mrs. Lathrop.

  "Then he says one awful day when he was stackin' straw, Old Pearson toldhim flat 'n' plain as if he was n't goin' to marry Tilly, he need n'tcount on spendin' the winter as their company. Well, he says you canmaybe realize what a shock that was. He says his nose was just smashednumb 'n' his sleep was full o' grabbin' at 'em in his dreams 'n' now itlooked like all was for nothin' a _tall_. Still he says he scraped up asmile 'n' a cheerful look 'n' told Old Pearson as he was more 'n willin'to marry Tilly for his winter's board but it was Tilly as was makin' thetrouble. He says Old Pearson looked sort of surprised at that, but hethought a little while 'n' then he told him as if he was smart he 'dfind a way to bring Tilly to her senses, 'cause every woman had some wayto be brought to her senses, 'n' then he went off 'n' left him to think.

  "Well, Mrs. Lathrop, you can see without any tryin' that that mansuffered. I pretty near stopped 'n' burnt jus' to listen to him. He saysas he sit there plum beside hisself 'n' most cried from not knowin' whatunder Heaven's name to do. He says he was placed most awful with winterstarin' him stark in the face 'n' no warm place to stay. He says nobodyknows how it feels to feel like he was forced to feel,--'nless they'vebeen expectin' to be married 'n' then been discharged themselvesinstead. He says he looked about most doleful 'n' wished he was dead oranythin' that's warm, 'n' then he got down from the stack 'n' set on aold wagon tongue 'n' jus' tried to figger on if there was n't no way ashe could think up as would make Tilly have him. He says the bitter partwas to reflect as he had to work to make Tilly have him, when it 'dreally ought by all rights to have been the other way. He says to thinko' that nose 'n' then him obliged to work 'n' slave to get hold of it!"

  "I--" began Mrs. Lathrop.

  "Well, he see it different," said Susan; "he says,--'n' I can't inreason see how any one as knows as little as you, Mrs. Lathrop, can denyhim,--he says as no one as gets married easy at the end of courtin' canpossibly figger on the difficulties of gettin' married hard. He says itwas jus' beyond belief the way he felt as he set there reflectin' on hiswasted summer 'n' Tilly flippin' aroun' all unconcerned over him leavin'in the end. He says his blood begun to slowly begin to boil as he setthere thinkin', 'n' in the end he jus' up an' hit the wagon-tongue withhis fist 'n' said 'By Jinks!' 'n' he says when he says 'By Jinks,' it_is_ the end, 'n' don't you forget it.

  "He says he 'd no sooner said 'By Jinks' than he thought of a plan, 'n'he says Lord forgive him if he ever thinks of such another plan. He sayswhat put it into his head Heaven only knows, only o' course he neverexpected as it would work out as it did. He says he thought as she 'dsee what he was up to 'n' stop him along half-way. But Oh, my, he says,you never can count on a woman, 'n' then he rubbed his chin with hishand for a long time 'n' said all over again 'never can count on awoman.'

  "Well, he says after he'd thought o' the plan he went right to work tocarry it out. He says it was one o' them plans as dilly-dally is deathon. So he begun by makin' sure as she was pastin' labels on pickle-jarsin the back wood-house 'n' then he went out by the shed 'n' got some oldclothes-line as was hangin' there 'n' come round to where thebingin'-pole was 'n' whittled notches in it 'n' tied a piece o' the linehard aroun' the end. He says all the time he was tyin' he was countin'on her runnin' right out 'n' askin' him what under the sun he wasdoin',--but she never budged."

  "What--" asked Mrs. Lathrop.

  "Well, if you 'll keep still 'n' let me talk I 'll tell you," said MissClegg; "I had to keep still while he told me, 'n' the Bible 's authorityfor sayin' as what man has done woman can always do too if she has amind to.--Well, he says then he bent the end of the pole around 'n' tiedit hard to one of the uprights of the shed so it was sprung around in aterrible dangerous manner 'n' he says when he got it all tied, he lookedup at the window 'n' why she did n't come out he can't to this day see.But she did n't--just stayed bobbin' around over her labels 'n' pastin'.Well, he says o' course he wa'n't in no hurry to go on to next part, sohe dragged the grin'stone out in plain view of her 'n' begun 'n'sharpened a hatchet most awful sharp. He thought as the hatchet wouldbring her anyhow, but still she did n't come out,--jus' stuck to herstickin' there in the window. I can't well see why he looked for her tocome out because my view would be as if you did n't want a man aroun',the more ropes an' hatchets he was inclined to the more I 'd let him tie'n' sharpen, but old Mrs. Ely was always another parts o' speech fromme. She never could eat her own chickens, they say, nor sausage her ownpigs, 'n' I s'pose he knowed her tender spots aforehand 'n' was layin'for 'em. Anyhow, to go back to him 'n' the grin'stone, he says you can'tunder no circumstances keep on sharpenin' a hatchet forever, 'n' soafter a while he _had_ to go on to the next part. He says he wasbeginnin' to feel kind o' shaky, but he took more line 'n' made aslip-noose 'n' tied it hard 'n' fast to the pole. He says he looked upreal bright 'n' hopeful then, but still she did n't come out, 'n' hesays he slid it up over his arm two or three times so she could n't butsee as it was a noose too. Oh, my, but he says he did begin to feel madat her then,--he says it wa'n't in reason as any man 'd be pleased at awoman's smilin' out of a window at him fixin' a noose in plain sight. Hesays he 'll leave it to any one dead or alive to get into his skin 'n'enjoy the way he was beginnin' to feel, but o' course he had to keep onwith his plan, 'n' he says next he laid the hatchet handy an' set down(Oh, my, but he says the ground sent up a cold chill up his back!) 'n'tied his feet to the other upright. Well, he says that foot-tyin' was nojoke, for he says he must of took fifteen minutes to it, for he was jus'about wild by this time, not knowin' what he _would_ do if she did n'tcome out _now_. He says no one knows what it is to begin a thing as youcount on _surely_ havin' stopped 'n' then not be stopped a _tall_. Hesays as the sentiments as he begun to get was too awful for any ordinarywords 'n' he would scorn to use the words as could describe 'em even ifhe knowed any such. Well, he says, at last, when he was through tyin'his feet, he turned 'n' looked at the window 'n' if she wa'n't gone toput up the jars, so he had no choice but to sit there on that coldground 'n' wait for her to come back. He said he hoped I 'd never knowwhat his feelin's was as he waited 'n' then he rubbed his chin with hishand a long time 'n' said all over again, 'as he waited.' I told him itwas n't likely as I would, 'n' to look out for the cistern or he 'd knownew feelin's 'n' a new kind of waitin', so he had to hitch back by thetable again 'n' then he took a long breath before goin' on to the nextpart.

  "Well, Mrs. Lathrop, he says when she come back from puttin' up the jarshe jus' could n't but feel as his hour was surely come. He says how heever done it he never has seen since, but he took up that noose 'n' putit over his head. He says as he did so he took a quick look at thewindow 'n' seen her lookin', 'n' he says he jus' hoped _surely_ she 'dgive a scream _now_ 'n' come runnin' out the kitchen-door. But he saysshe 'd disappointed him so often his heart was like lead, 'n he feltbluer 'n he 's ever felt any other time in his life. He says he fixedthe noose all smooth around his neck for five minutes or so, 'n' thenthere was nothin' in the wide world left for him to do but to take upthat awful sharp hat
chet.

  "Well, Mrs. Lathrop, I vow I was interested in spite of myself. Hisvoice shook 'n' his hands too jus' with rememberin'. I really felt topity him--I did. He says he lifted the hatchet 'n' looked at the windowtryin' to hope fully 'n' securely as _this_ time she 'd _surely_ comeout screamin' 'n' runnin'. 'N' she never screamed 'n' she never run! Oh,my, but he says he was tremblin' from head to foot 'n' the cold sweatjus' poured over him. He says he took up the hatchet 'n' held itquiverin' in his quiverin' hand, 'n' then he made a weak hack at therope as tied the pole to the upright. He says he see her nose in thewindow as he hacked 'n' then he says no words can ever describe hisfeelin's when he suddenly learned as he 'd cut the rope!--He says henever had no more idea o' hittin' the rope than he had o' hangin'himself, 'n' he said when he very quickly felt as he 'd done bothnothin' can properly explain him!--He says the newspapers don't have noidea a _tall_ of how it feels or they 'd never print it so cool 'n'calm. He says cuttin' the rope let the pole loose 'n' the noose ran upon him 'n' choked him most terrible. My gracious, he says but carbolicacid 'n' Rough on Rats is child's play beside that grip on your throat.He says he never will forget how it felt, not if he lives to beMethusalem's great-grandfather. He says he got a most awful jerk fromhis head to his heels too as nigh to broke his ankles, 'n' a twist inhis wrist from the weight o' the hatchet, but he said he did n't have notime to take no a'count o' nothin' just then but the way everythin'turned red 'n' black 'n' run into his ears."

  "Did it kill--" cried Mrs. Lathrop, much excited.

  "I 'm goin' to tell you.--He says the last thing he knowed was Tilly'sshriek. O' course when he cut the rope she seen he 'd meant it all, 'n'so she grabbed up a carvin' knife 'n' yelled to her father 'n' run. Oldman Ely says it was good she run, for there was n't a minute to lose.Old Pearson run too from where he was in the barn but Tilly got therefirst. She didn't lose one second in sawin' him free at both ends 'n' hesays he was so nigh to dead that first he thought she was a gopher, 'n'then an angel. Oh, my, but he says he was dizzy at first, 'n' faint, 'n'queer in his ears. He sat 'n' thought about it all by himself for a longwhile this mornin' afore he went on again. He says no one ever realizeshow close they are to eternity unless they accidentally go 'n' dosuthin' so darn foolish as that.

  "Well, he says, after a while, after a long, long while, he felt to getto the house, 'n' then, he says, come one o' the strangest parts o' thestory--the part as shows how everythin' turns out for the best in theend. He says it's really most like a fairy-tale, 'n' jus' as if he 'dplanned it all to order. Seems when he tried to get up 'n' walk to thehouse Tilly wanted her father to help hold up his other side, 'n' shecould n't see where her father was. She started aroun' the shed to lookfor him 'n' there she found him stretched out flat.--Seems when she cutEly loose she let the pole fly roun' jus' in time to take her father inthe legs 'n' there he laid, not dead, but in a way as showed right offas some one else 'd have to run his farm from then on. Well, old man Elysays you need n't tell him as there ain't no All-wise Providence after_that_, 'n' he rubbed his chin with his hand a long, long while 'n'shook his head 'n' then said 'need n't tell _him_' all over again. Hesays he joined the church the very next Sunday 'n' him 'n' Tilly wasmarried in September like he 'd always planned. He says they was veryhappy on the whole 'n' after a while Old Pearson got where he got aroundpretty well, only for a crazy idea he had as suthin' unexpected wasgoin' to hit him sudden. He says he had the idea so strong as he neverwas free from it while he was alive 'n' it was a mercy when he died. Hesays as he see how good things can turn out, for, Tilly always jus'loved him half to death 'cause he 'd loved her enough to cut that ropein two. He says he means her to have a very handsome monument, 'n' if heever marries again he shall keep her picture in the parlor just thesame."

  "Do--" said Mrs. Lathrop.

  "Well, I think he 'll try to," said Miss Clegg, "but his other wife maynot see it in the same spirit, Mrs. Ely not bein' no great ornament, 'n'the farm is safe now anyhow."

  "I--" said Mrs. Lathrop, further.

  "Yes," said Susan, "I thought so myself but it did n't seem to strikehim that way."

  * * * * *

  THE WOLF AT SUSAN'S DOOR