Until We Collide

by Charlotte Fallowfield

  ‘You sure do. Is a bottle of wine to take to the table pushing it?’

  ‘How about we have a bottle of champagne?’ he suggested, only to be met by Poppie’s excited claps and a nod of approval from Reece.

  ‘I love him already,’ Poppie beamed at me.

  I couldn’t believe it was time to leave already. We’d had an amazing night. A delicious four course meal, coffee, and petit fours, and I’d even succumbed and had two glasses of champagne, leaving me feeling more than a little lightheaded. Poppie and Reece had made me cringe, and Alec laugh, with tales of some of my worst disasters. I’d kicked her under the table, worried she was going to put him off me. We’d danced too, and of course he was a great dancer. I doubted that there was anything that he did badly. But other than my unladylike nasal douching of his jacket, nothing untoward had happened, and yet he still hadn’t kissed me. I fiddled with my fingers in my lap for the full journey home, neither of us saying a word. The tension in the car was palpable. All I could think about was the kiss. Would he do it when he pulled up on the drive? Or maybe as he showed me to the front door? Would I forget all of those kissing etiquette lessons that Poppie had given me and make him change his mind? It would be par for the course with me to have the shortest relationship in the history of the universe.

  Or maybe he’d be about to kiss me and Dad would fling open the door and drag me inside. He was probably sitting there now, with a twelve bore shotgun on his lap, ready to take out the man who dared to defile his daughter. He’d probably been online, perusing all sorts of erotic sites that a man his age should never look at for fear of a heart attack, looking for a chastity belt for me until Alec asked for my hand in marriage. Marriage! Crikey, I hadn’t even scribbled our names with a heart yet, or practiced my potential new signature, and I was thinking about marriage? Mrs. Paige Wright. It had a nice ring to it. A really nice ring. Rings! I wondered what sort of ring he’d buy. I had a feeling he’d be a classic sort of guy. A solitaire, probably square, and he’d definitely go down on one knee. He was so chivalrous. I could hear him saying my name now, as he kneeled there in front of me, clasping my hand, tears of happiness in his eyes.

  ‘Paige, Paige. Is everything ok?’

  ‘What, huh, what?’ I asked, blinking and looking around. He wasn’t on one knee proposing, we were parked on the drive and he was looking at me strangely. O God, please don’t let me have said “Mrs. Paige Wright” out loud. I’d nearly made it through the whole evening with only one embarrassing moment.

  ‘You zoned out there for a moment, are you ok?’

  ‘Sorry, I’m fine, really fine. More than fine. I had an amazing evening and I’m so sorry about the snort. I don’t usually snort like some kind of truffle pig. I don’t know what came over me. It’s just you of all people, suggesting I should be a model. You should be a model. You’re way better looking than David Beckham, or David Gandy, in fact any David out there who models. Any model, by any name, and I haven’t even seen your body, but I imagine it’s pretty toned. Not that I mentally undress you with my eyes every time I see you, I mean obviously I’ve thought about what you might look like naked, but I’m not some obsessive pervert. God,’ I groaned, covering my face with my hands. ‘I’m doing it again.’

  ‘Why are you so nervous?’ he laughed, reaching over the centre console to pull my hands away.

  ‘Because our date is over and you’re probably going to kiss me.’

  ‘Don’t you want me to kiss you?’ he asked, his voice low and husky as one of his hands reached up to clasp the back of my neck, drawing me closer to those perfect lips of his, until I could feel the heat of his breath caressing mine. My chest was heaving, I felt lightheaded, and my hands were trembling. I’d dreamed of this moment for so long, but now that it was here, I was completely terrified.

  ‘So badly,’ I whispered, ‘but I … I’m worried you won’t enjoy it, that I won’t be as good as your other girls. I’m not exactly experienced. I don’t know how to…’ He cut me off by pressing his lips gently against mine, forcing an audible moan from my mouth as it tingled and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. He did it again, more forcefully this time, and I felt myself respond. The rush I felt was so much better than the two glasses of champagne that had made me giddy earlier. He tilted his head, angling his mouth as he started to kiss me properly, the way I’d always seen, and envied, in movies. My body sagged as my lips parted and his tongue sank into my mouth. Fireworks went off behind my eyes, my whole body humming with need. I could die happy right now. Kissing was amazing.

  ‘You’re perfect,’ he murmured against my lips. He clasped my face with both hands and kissed me again, and I found my hands reaching for his hair, tugging it as I moaned into his mouth. I screamed, and Alec jumped, when there was a loud knock on the window.

  ‘Paige Taylor, if you don’t want your dad to ground you, you’d better get inside right now. He’s been on the lookout for you for the last hour, you’re lucky he just went to the toilet. You have about a minute before he comes out and spots you,’ Mum called. I groaned with embarrassment as Alec released me and we watched her walk up to the front door in her dressing gown.

  ‘So, I guess this is goodnight then?’ Alec asked, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

  ‘I guess it is. I’m so sorry.’

  ‘Don’t be, they agreed two a.m. and it’s five past. I don’t want him banning me from coming to pick you up again.’

  ‘So, we’re doing it again?’ I asked, biting my lower lip nervously.

  ‘We are,’ he grinned, leaning forward to kiss me again quickly. ‘Can I see you tomorrow night?’

  ‘I’d really love to, but I babysit for this family and they’ve arranged a meal out as they have some news they want to share with me. I daren’t let them down.’

  ‘Sunday afternoon? I was planning on leaving for London straight after a goodbye lunch with my family, but I can leave later if you’re free?’

  ‘That would be great. Do you want my number?’ I asked, finally feeling brave.

  ‘Poppie’s already given it to me,’ he smirked. ‘Go, before you’re grounded and I can’t see you for a month.’

  ‘Thank you, again. I had an amazing evening.’ I leaned in and kissed him this time, wishing Dad was already asleep so I could just stay in here and make out with Alec all night. I quickly got out of the car before Alec had a chance to come and open my door. I watched him reverse and wrapped my arms around myself as he opened his window.

  ‘Paige?’

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘Best kiss ever,’ he called with a cheeky wink. I resisted the urge to whoop, Julia Roberts Pretty Woman style. Instead, I just grinned and reached up to touch my lips as he drove off. Lips that were still bee-stung from kissing him. I turned around to see Dad, framed in the open door with his arms folded across his chest.

  ‘Good night?’ he asked as I skipped in.

  ‘The best. I’m off to bed.’ I kissed his cheek.

  ‘Was he respectful, or do I need to offer to get inappropriately violent to defend my daughter’s honour?’

  ‘Nothing but respectful. He kissed me, nothing more.’ I raced up to my bedroom. Right now I just wanted to be alone, to relive the night in every minute detail. For a first ever first date, it had been amazing.

  The Dilemma

  Saturday

  I wandered into the lounge in a daze, to find Mum and Dad watching a film.

  ‘What’s wrong?’ Mum asked, reading the conflicting emotions on my face immediately.

  ‘I’ve just been offered a full-time job as nanny to Brennan,’ I sighed, throwing myself down onto the sofa next to her.

  ‘What about university?’ Dad asked immediately. He was so proud that I was planning to attend Cambridge.

  ‘One of the many things I need to think about,’ I nodded.

  ‘They want you to live in? In Shrewsbury?’ Mum took my hand and squeezed it. She’d always told me she dreaded the day I left to go
to university, but that was about two months away. Two more months of us spending time together, trying to adjust to the inevitable separation. She was going to be upset when I broke the news to her about this offer.

  ‘Live in, yes. Shrewsbury, not so much.’

  ‘They’re moving?’

  ‘Yes,’ I confirmed, dreading the next question.

  ‘Where to?’

  ‘The Caribbean.’ I looked up at her as she took a shocked gasp. Dad immediately muted the lottery results, spinning in his leather recliner to face me.

  ‘What?’ Mum uttered, her face falling.

  ‘They’re moving to Grand Cayman with Mr. Farquar’s job. He’s accepted a three-year transfer, and they want me to go with them. They already have a holiday home out there to move into. It has a pool house with a one bedroomed suite above it that would be all mine. They’re offering a really amazing salary and benefits. I’d have the evenings free once I’d put Brennan down, if they weren’t out, plus two days off a week and first class flights when I take my annual leave.’

  ‘What about university?’ Dad repeated, impatient for an answer.

  ‘Dad, I don’t know,’ I moaned, throwing my hands up in the air. ‘Four hours ago my future was mapped out, but this is an amazing opportunity that I may never get again. It would include all board and lodgings and I could save a load of money, which would mean no student loans strangling me for the next ten years. But …’ I broke off and shook my head, still no clearer what to do.

  ‘There’s other considerations,’ Mum said softly, squeezing my hand. I bit my lip as my eyes filled with tears. I’d miss her and Dad so much, not to mention Poppie. We’d been best friends since we met at primary school eleven years ago. There was never a day when we didn’t either see, phone, or text each other. Then there was Alec. I’d not only found myself a boyfriend, but he was the one guy I’d fantasised about forever, and our first date had gone so well.

  ‘You can nanny anytime, get yourself an education first,’ Dad muttered stubbornly.

  ‘Richard,’ Mum scolded. ‘She’s an adult now, it’s her decision to make. Paige is right, this is an amazing opportunity. We gave her the choice of paying her fees, or buying her a new, reliable car to get around in, and she chose the car, which we’ve already ordered. She’d be saddled with debt for years if she goes now, like most students. Wouldn’t taking this job for a few years and building a nest egg be better? If her results are as good as we expect, she can always apply to Cambridge as a mature student.’

  ‘How many people plan a time out and end up never going back to their studies?’ Dad retorted with a knowing look. He and Mum had met in a gap year while travelling and she’d got pregnant with me, which had put a halt to both of their plans. I think he had all of his hopes pinned on me picking up their mantle.

  ‘That may be true, but you can’t tell me that you regret the way things worked out for us. We have a beautiful and intelligent daughter because of it. Don’t listen to your dad, what do you want to do, darling?’

  ‘If they’d asked me last weekend, I’d probably have bitten their hand off,’ I admitted with a heavy sigh.

  ‘What’s changed in a week?’ Dad asked. ‘What?’ he repeated when Mum and I gave him a look, and one of understanding settled on his face. ‘Do not tell me that you’re basing a decision on your future around a boy?’ he bit, standing up and tossing the remote on the table. I grimaced, he rarely got angry, especially not with me. ‘I thought I taught you better than that, that I’d raised you to be sensible and level headed.’ He stormed out of the room and slammed the door, making a few tears trickle down my cheeks.

  ‘Give him time, he’s just upset at the thought of losing you, but he’s right, Paige. Whether you take this job or not, much as I like Alec, you can’t make this about him. You’ve been on one date.’

  ‘I know,’ I groaned, tipping my head back on the sofa. I was so confused.

  ‘When would they want you to start?’ she asked softly. I swallowed hard, knowing I was likely to upset her, too.

  ‘Next weekend,’ I said quietly, before I burst into full-blown, uncontrollable tears.

  ‘O, Paige,’ she sighed, gathering me into her arms. ‘Ignore your dad, do what’s right for you, for your future. I always wanted to go to university, but life had a different path in mind for me and I’ve never regretted having you. Neither has your dad. Nothing can ever break the bond you have with Poppie, no matter where in the world you are. And if Alec is really the boy for you, there’s nothing to stop you seeing each other when you’re home, is there?’ she asked.

  Sunday

  I put the phone down after a long chat with Poppie. Both of us had cried, but she agreed that nothing could get in the way of our friendship. In fact, she’d told me that she’d de-friend me if I didn’t take the job. That was Mum and Poppie for me going, I was still undecided, Dad was against, and Alec, well I had to face him later and I had no idea how he was going to react as I barely knew him. If we’d been seeing each other for six months, a year even, maybe I’d have no problem declining a job that would take me away from him, but I had to be realistic. We could split up in a week, a month, a year, and I knew myself too well, I’d always wonder “what if.” I could potentially get a boyfriend anywhere in the world, but a job like this would be much harder to find.

  I quickly washed the tears off my cheeks and put on a bit of makeup to disguise the fact that I’d been crying. Alec was picking me up in half an hour and I had no idea how that was going to go. In a total contrast to the warm weather of yesterday, it was raining today, so I dressed in my navy jeans and Converses, with a white vest and white crochet jumper over the top, leaving my hair loose. I sat at my dressing table, staring at the pictures of Poppie and me tucked into the vintage white frame of my old mirror. It only made my dilemma harder. I roused myself from my daze when I heard a car pulling onto our drive and checked my watch. He was five minutes early. I stood up and took a deep, calming breath, then blew it out forcefully, grabbed my bag, and made my way downstairs. Dad had gone out to play golf this morning, so I’d not seen him since he stomped out last night. Mum had told me that they’d talked most of the night and she’d calmed him down, but I could really do with his sage advice right now.

  ‘Be honest, with him and yourself, that’s all anyone can ask of you,’ Mum advised as she kissed me and disappeared, leaving me to answer the door as it was knocked. I didn’t need to force a smile, the thought of seeing him again did that for me.

  ‘Hi,’ I greeted, suddenly suffering from dry mouth again to see him. He was dressed in black jeans, a white shirt tucked in and rolled at the sleeves, and a grey waistcoat, and had one arm behind his back. When he smiled, I sprung an immediate lady boner and felt my cheeks flush.

  ‘Hi,’ he replied, bending forward to kiss me. I flung my arms around his neck and kissed him back, relishing the feeling that surged through my body when his one arm anchored tightly around my back, crushing me to him. Why did I have to be offered this amazing opportunity now? It was seriously shitty timing. ‘Wow, I take it your dad’s not home,’ he laughed, looking slightly dazed when he finally pulled away, leaving me panting and flustered.

  ‘Sunday is golf day.’

  ‘Never seen the attraction myself. You on the other hand, phew,’ he whistled, giving me an appraising once over. ‘Even casual, you look seriously hot. These are for you.’

  ‘Thank you,’ I responded, to his compliment and the hand-tied rustic bunch of the brightest blue flowers I’d ever seen.

  ‘I wanted to get you a fancy bouquet from Parker’s Florists, but they couldn’t source flowers that came anywhere near as blue as your eyes, so I stole these from my mum’s back garden instead,’ he shrugged, looking a little embarrassed.

  ‘Then I’ll treasure them even more than a fancy bouquet, because you put so much thought into them,’ I nodded, lifting them to my nose to smell them and try and hide the tears forming in my eyes.

  ‘Rea
dy to go?’ he asked.

  ‘Sure, just give me a minute to put these in water.’ I flashed him a quick smile and ran through to the kitchen, filling a glass from the tap and making sure that all of the stems were well immersed. They were a gorgeous colour and I really did appreciate that he’d not plumped for the easy option of ordering a flashy, expensive bouquet. He showed me to the car, leaning in to kiss the side of my neck before I slipped inside. How could something so simple as a kiss on my skin make my body turn to jelly?

  ‘What’s wrong?’ he asked as soon as he climbed in next to me.

  ‘Nothing,’ I forced, trying my best to cover.

  ‘Don’t lie to me, Paige. I pride myself on my honesty and I expect the same in return. You’ve been crying and you look like you’re about to cry again. Have you changed your mind about seeing me?’ he asked, looking hurt.

  ‘No, God no,’ I shot back, swallowing hard. ‘It’s just … I don’t know what to do.’ My shoulders slumped as I looked at him. He was in touching distance again, but I could feel him slipping out of my fingers before we’d even had a chance to see if this could have been something.

  ‘Paige,’ he warned, reaching over to take my hand. ‘Talk to me.’

  ‘Ok.’ I took a deep breath and spoke in a rush, telling him about my offer and my dilemma before I could change my mind. He rubbed his hand over his mouth when I finally finished my monologue, then shoved it through his hair with a sigh.

  ‘Why haven’t you already accepted? It’s an amazing offer.’

  ‘I know,’ I confirmed, feeling myself getting emotional again. ‘I just needed some time to weigh up the pros and cons.’

  ‘Tell me it’s nothing to do with me,’ he exclaimed.