“I’m sorry.”
“Thank you, it’s not something I mention often. Over time you’ll learn more.”
“Your family sounds nice.”
“Yours too. Hey, do you want to watch a movie in my room. I have surround sound in there, it’s pretty sick.” He emphasized the last word, trying to sound cool.
“Well if it’s pretty sick, then I’ll have to experience it,” I joshed.
“Okay.” He pushed himself off the counter. “Go on in and pick out a movie. I’m going to take a shower.”
“Mhm.”
We walked into his room. He showed me where some of the movies were and then headed for the bathroom, leaving the door open a crack. Light spilled into the dimly lit bedroom. Curious, I peered in his direction and noticed a mirror. Scotty walked into view; I could see everything from the waist up. He leaned in and turned on the shower. I watched as he took his shorts off and draped them over the top of the shower wall. He stepped in and I got a quick peak at his butt before he became distorted by the glass wall.
I shook my head and looked back toward the movies. I quickly grabbed one when I heard the shower shut off, paying no attention to its title, and hopped up on the bed. I climb to the head of the bed. Light filled the room again and Scotty walked out with only a towel wrapped around him. My jaw dropped slightly. I watched as he walked toward me, snapping on the light beside me. I looked up at him in awe.
“What movie did you pick out?”
I eyed him closely, focusing on every bit of him I could. I watched as he brought his hands up and shook his hair, a mist of water rained down on me and I giggled. I noticed his towel slowly beginning to unravel. The thought of yanking it off him crossed my mind. There go my raging hormones again.
“Dawn of the Dead, cool, you like horror too?”
“Yeah.”
“It’s not as good as the original, but then again almost nothing is. The DVD player is under the TV, I’ll be in, in a second.”
He walked around the foot of the bed, into his closet, and turned on the light. I quickly got up and put in the movie. I crawled onto the bed and for a moment wished I could do this every night. I looked at his closet and watched his shadow as he dropped his towel and bent over. He emerged in pajama bottoms and climbed into bed. Why don’t you crawl up on top of me darlin? I thought to myself in a thick, Blanche Deveraux accent.
He scooted toward me and smiled; he was always smiling.
“Want to grab the remote? It’s in the drawer next to you.”
“Sure.”
I opened the drawer and noticed not the remote, but three condoms. A bottle of lubricant rolled forward and rested next to them. Tempted by the thought of embarrassing him, I almost made a comment instead I grabbed the remote.
“Would you like any popcorn?” Scotty asked leaning forward.
“Only if you wanted some.”
“I’m not one to turn down food.”
“I’ve noticed,” I joked.
“I’ll be right back.”
He got up and skip-jogged toward the kitchen. Butter sizzled and kernels heated up and exploded. The previews were over with by the time Scotty walked back in. He got back up on the bed and sat the bowl between us. I turned on my side and faced him and watched him do the same as he hit play.
The opening scene started. Everything was calm and peaceful. The camera focused on a young couple lying in their bed, talking. Although I’ve seen this part a thousand times it always scared me. Out of nowhere something slammed against the door. I jumped slightly and heard Scotty chuckle, I just ignored him and focused on the movie. The young couple sat up. There was another hard slam, and the door split. The husband stood up, slowly walking to the door. Everything went quiet. I reached in for more popcorn and felt Scotty’s hand touch mine. The next slam made me jump again.
“I have a love-hate relationship with zombie movies,” I muttered.
“Awe, poor baby. Need a pillow to hide behind?”
“No.” I playfully slapped his arm.
“Well never fear, I’ll protect you.”
He bit his lower lip again and darted his eyes over me. We leaned closer. Before things got the better of me, I looked back to the TV.
The husband peeked through the crack in the door before opening it. Slowly a little girl shuffled around the corner down the hall. She looked up, her eyes sunken in with blood around her mouth. She charged forward, her pigtails swaying back and forth as she picked up speed. She launched for the husband, he started fighting her off. His wife ran into the bathroom and close the door. The little girl bit into his neck, silencing him.
I winced and leaned into Scotty’s shoulder. I wasn’t as scared as I was letting on, but this gave me an excuse to be near him. His body heat warmed my cheek.
“You know we can watch something else,” Scotty said.
I looked back at the TV. “It’s okay. I’m still tired. I’ll probably fall asleep soon.”
We went back to our assumed positions and continued to watch the movie. About halfway through my eyes began to droop and my body became limp. I turned closer to Scotty and noticed he had moved the bowl of popcorn. When did that happen? I also noticed he was closer to me, now about an inch or two separated us. My eyes felt heavy and my body relaxed further. I slouched toward Scotty and nestled against him. I draped my arm across his chest, and vaguely remember feeling his arm wrap around me. He pulled me closer.
The droning beat of his heart soothed me; the rhythmic beats sent me into unconsciousness. I returned to a dream I had become all too familiar with over the last few months.
I was on a hammock, book in one hand, and a drink in the other. I took a sip, it was fruity, a mix of pineapple and orange. I turn my attention to my book. While it looked familiar, I didn’t recall ever reading it. I turn it over and looked at the cover. It was Romeo and Juliet. I go back to the page I was on and see the words have disappeared. I set my drink down and flip through the pages. Most were blank, while others had occasional words and phrases here and there.
I gave up on the book, close it, and put my hands behind my head closing my eyes. The ocean breeze slowly rocked me back and forth. I saw a shadow move in front of me and felt the hammock sink slightly as someone got in and move toward me. Whoever it was removed my sunglasses. I open my eyes, squinting from the blinding light.
The mysterious person moves closer, casting a shadow over me. I feel their fingers brush my arms and my heartbeat picks up. Their lips touch my chest and I love the tickly feeling they made as they moved up and over my collarbone. They moved up my neck until finally their lips meet mine, extinguishing the light.
Finally, I saw my mystery person.
My mystery man.
I was looking into Scotty’s eyes. We continue to kiss. Scotty moves back to my neck. Just as it got good, he disappears and everything went black.
I’m thrown into another dream. This one blurry.
Rippled.
It was like I was peering through water, watching distorted images move by my vision. Some confused me, then a series of events, the ones which led me to where I am now, began to play. I saw Kip as he leaned into kiss me, my family moving across the country, meeting Scotty for the first time, and nearly drowning this afternoon… Then I saw images I didn’t know the meanings to.
I saw tomorrow where I wake up in Scotty’s bed.
I saw myself telling my parents something, but I couldn’t hear what I said, just their faces morphing into cruel, scary, unaccepting expressions.
My dad yelling. Me having no idea why.
Water thrashes over me, sending me back into the previous dream.
Scotty was half on me. We were still lying on the hammock, swaying back and forth with the breeze.
I rub his back. Beads of sweat ran down both of our bodies, hitting the sand below, sizzling on contact. I listen to the ice from my drink crackle as it melted and breaks into small shards in the sun’s heat. I felt Scotty’s fingertips run
across my waist, up my stomach, and over my chest, and then back south to an area of the body so many men the world over loved so much.
CHAPTER ELEVEN: WAY TO YOU
I opened my eyes.
I was still cuddled against Scotty, clinging tight to his side. My hand rested on his chest. My breathing steadily slowed. I could faintly hear his heartbeat but apparently, I hadn’t woken him up. I looked over his shoulder at the alarm clock, it was nine forty-five in the morning. I sighed and closed my eyes. Scotty moved around in his sleep putting his arm around me and pulled me closer to him. Our legs intertwined and both our heartbeats picked up again.
Scotty’s skin still smelled of lemons, it relaxed me. I lightly rubbed my fingers along his chest, and over his nipple. His skin was just as soft as the blanket we were lying on. He tensed up, letting out a deep muffled moan. I stopped for a second then continued, tracing lines down his side and over his belly button. His breathing increased and he moaned again. I was addicted to the sound of his moan, I wanted more. I ran my fingers back up his body and over his chest and monitored his breathing as I placed my hand over his heart. His heart pounded vigorously against my hand, it sounded out of this world.
I heard a low buzz build into a high-pitched chirp and froze instantly. Scotty hit his alarm clock, and a deep sigh rumbled from him. His hand fell from my shoulder and I felt his thumb lightly rub the small of my back sending chills up my spine. Blood pulsated throughout my body and I could feel myself starting to get hard. I remained calm and acted like I was still asleep.
“Kyle?” Scotty whispered, rubbing my back again. “Wake up it’s morning.”
I grumbled, turned over and sat up. I sensed Scotty’s eyes on me. “Morning,” I mumbled.
“Morning.”
“I’ll be right back,” I said, grabbing my phone and heading for the bathroom.
“Okay want anything for breakfast?”
“Whatever you’re having.”
I leaned against the bathroom door, sighed and slid down into a sitting position. It felt hard to breathe. Had my mystery person been him all along? Why was my dad yelling at me? What did I do? It was time to talk to Scotty, so what if I was attracted to him, and sorta kinda wanted to date him.
I checked my phone and saw I had one from Emilie; I know your scared to come out. but honey, it’s obvious Scotty is into you. You’ve got this Kyle!
I quickly wrote back. I’m coming out to him today. What do you say we meet at one?
“Kyle, breakfast is ready!” Scotty yelled from the kitchen.
My phone buzzed. Sounds like a plan! Good luck!!
Scotty was pacing around the kitchen when I walked in. He politely pulled out my chair. The island was set with two plates. I sat down and watched a Belgium waffle slide onto my plate. Bacon, fruit, and a small glass of orange juice completed the meal.
“Thanks for making me breakfast,” I said putting my shirt on.
“You didn’t think I was going to send you home with an empty stomach, did you?”
I laughed. “You’re a dork.”
“I’ve been called worse. How is it?”
“Delicious. What are you doing today?”
“Sunday is our family day. We’re going for a hike this afternoon and probably doing a dinner after. How about yourself?”
“I’m hanging out with Emilie. She wants to go see 30 Minutes or Less.”
“That’s that new Jesse Eisenberg movie, right?”
“Yeah, it looks lame. I think Emilie secretly has a crush on Jesse.”
We finished eating in silence and I cleared the dishes.
“You don’t have to wash them,” Scotty said, trying to stop me.
“I don’t mind, see I’m almost done,” I said rinsing the last of the dishes.
“Ready?” Scotty asked.
§ § § §
We reached my house in what seemed like no time at all. Scotty pulled into the end of the driveway and idled the engine. I looked at Scotty wishing there was an easy button for life. Better yet a pause button. I could just hit pause and figure out the right string of words I wanted to say to him and hit play again.
“Want to come in?”
“Sure,” he said with a pleased look on his face.
“If my parents ask, you met up with Emilie and me for breakfast.”
“You got it.”
He followed me up the driveway. My heart raced as I opened the door to invite in a boy I liked. Mom was in the den when we walked in.
“Hey Kyle, who’s your friend?”
“Oh right, you two haven’t met yet. Mom, this is Scotty.”
“Ah the elusive Scotty, my son talks highly of you. Nice to meet you.”
Scotty walked over and shook my mom’s hand.
“Pleased to meet you Mrs. McKinley.”
“Oh, and he’s respectful. I can see why my son likes you.” My face felt warm and grew increasingly hotter when my mom and Scotty looked over at me. “How was your time with Emilie?”
“Good.”
“What did you two do yesterday?”
“Nothing much, Scotty taught us how to surf, which was an epic fail on my behalf.”
“You weren’t bad,” Scotty said.
I almost said I nearly drowned but caught myself.
“I say a few more lessons and you’ll pick it right up.”
“Only if you’re teaching me.” Kyle stop hitting on Scotty in front of Mom. “Anyway, afterward I went back to Emilie’s place and we watched movies and I think I ate so much popcorn that I got my fix for the rest of the year.”
“I doubt that, popcorn is like its own food group with you. I’m guessing you all hung out again this morning?”
“Yup, we met up with Scotty for breakfast at this spot Emilie likes. She asked him a million questions about the movie.”
“It’s true,” Scotty added.
“How is the movie coming along?” Mom asked.
Inside I breathed a sigh of relief, she bought my somewhat made up story.
“Great. I’m back at it tomorrow. Should be a long day, animals are being introduced!” Scotty sarcastically said.
Mom laughed. “I bet. When is the movie going to be released?”
I leaned against the entry way and watched Scotty and my mom talk.
“They’re shooting for a late spring or early summer twenty-twelve release.”
“Oh my, long time from now.”
“Yeah there’s still another couple of months of filming and of course you have the editing and marketing. They’re taking their time with it. They’ll be working on it right up till the release date,” Scotty said, looking at me.
I noticed my mom’s eyes dart from Scotty to me and back to Scotty. I wondered if she picked up on the chemistry we so naturally had.
“Sounds like a long process, have you got any other projects?”
“My agent just signed me up for two more, and possibly another TV show,” Scotty replied, looking back at my mom.
Once again, I noticed my mom look back and forth between the two of us. “Small screen, very nice!” Mom paused and looked up at me.
“Well I hate to cut this conversation short, but I’ve got to run to the store,” Mom said.
“It was nice chatting with you,” Scotty said.
“Likewise.” Mom replied, rubbing my arm before leaving.
“Want to see my room?” I asked when we were alone.
“Sure.”
When we entered my room, I headed straight for the balcony, opening the doors. The last time I had a guy in my room it was back home in Maine. We’d only been here a month and a half and so much had changed since that night. I turned to face Scotty. He looked at me and smiled.
“There was something I wanted to talk about I just…” I trailed off.
I looked around at all my belongings. Books, art supplies and sketchpads were all over my desk, and my guitar was in the corner. All these things were distracting me from confessing my secret. Say it, ge
t it over with. You basically told him last night in the reading room why does today make it different? I wondered if it was this hard for everyone to come out.
Scotty took a step closer, smiling again. My heart skipped a beat as I began to feel nauseous and dizzy looking at his beautifully crooked grin and heart melting eyes. I took another deep breath. Beads of sweat formed along my hair line and ran down my brow. I diverted my eyes and chuckled to myself, took another deep breath, tried to moisten my mouth with saliva, failed miserably, and took the plunge.
“How’d you know you were gay?” I struggled to say.
My eyes darted up in time to see Scotty’s expression change instantly, like he wasn’t expecting me to ask this. Or perhaps because of last night he was. Either way the silence was becoming unbearable. It felt like hours had gone by but only a handful of seconds had ticked on since I asked him. He continued to look at me, still trying to form the words in his head. Finally, he grinned at me. Inside my heart pounded and I found it hard to breathe. My heart fluttered as he took another step toward me and brushed his hand against mine.
How do I breathe again? Oh, right, in and out. Slow and steady.
“How did you know you were straight?” Scotty replied, chuckling.
His laugh was musical. Like the catchy notes of my favorite song, keys on a piano, or strums on a guitar. Nothing else mattered. Everything disappeared when he smiled, as though we were the only two people in the world. Why do you do this to me? He stood in front of me with a smirk on his face. I opened my mouth to talk but nothing came out, just a faint exasperated breath. I felt myself start to shake. Back and forth I swayed as though I were about to faint. The nausea and dizziness returned. My mouth dry as sandpaper. I tried to speak.
Playing It Out Straight Page 18