Always

by Sam Crescent

  “What am I doing?” Eddie asked.

  “Take me back to Devil’s house.” She ran her hands along her thighs, taking a deep breath.

  “You okay?”

  “I’ll tell you later.”

  Eddie didn’t ask any more questions. When they got back to Devil’s house, she pulled out some cash, handing it to him. “Here you go.”

  “Don’t. keep it. I would do anything for him, and he knows it.”

  She nodded. “Thanks.”

  “Don’t mention it. If you need a ride anywhere, let me know, and there’s nothing sexual in it.”

  She chuckled. “Thanks.”

  Heading indoors, she saw Sasha, Pussy’s woman, was hanging out with the kids and Lexie.

  She gave them a wave and headed upstairs to quickly change. After a shower, she pulled on some sweatpants and headed to the kitchen to cook something, anything. She’d helped her mother plenty of times. Angel, Lash’s woman and old lady, was forever in the kitchen, and Tabitha always liked to watch. She settled on pasta. Devil tried to take over cooking as she’d been serving them up all-vegetable meals.

  Tucking her hair behind her ear, she tried not to get her hopes up each time the door opened. No one back home knew she’d been sitting at the same welcome sign back home with a bag packed. Of course, she’d been younger as well. Daisy didn’t know how she’d walked to the edge of town and held her bag. Every couple of cars had slowed down, asking her if she was okay. In the end, rather than hitchhiking it out of there, she’d gone back home, put her clothes away, and appeared at school the next day.

  She got it.

  But Simon was running from different things. He had to see that.

  “This smells good,” Simon said, drawing her out of her thoughts.

  She spun around to find him right there, in front of her. “You came back.”

  “You think I’m going to do anything that would make you angry or sad to be near me on purpose?”

  “I don’t know. For all I know, my being here has made you stop caring about me.” She shrugged, trying not to sound as broken as she felt at the very thought of him not wanting her.

  Simon went to her, gripping the back of her neck, tilting her face up, and kissing her hard. Wrapping her arms around him, she held on for dear life, not wanting to let him go.

  “You don’t ever have to fear that,” he said against her lips. “Tabby, what I feel for you isn’t normal.”

  She laughed. “That’s the way to a girl’s heart.”

  “What can I say, you struck me when we were kids, and I can’t move on. I love you way too much to ever be able to handle that.”

  “Damn, you say all the nicest things.”

  “Always.”

  ****

  “How is everything there?” Daisy asked.

  “Fine, I guess. I don’t know. It’s tough.”

  “Yeah, I heard the parents talking. They think you should come home.”

  “I’ve already spoken to my dad. If it gets to be too much, they want me home. I’m doing good. My schoolwork is on point so it’s not like they can pull me away because of that.”

  Daisy pouted. “What about us?” She rolled over so now Tabitha looked at Daisy lying down.

  “What about you guys?”

  “We miss you.”

  “I know. I miss you guys so much.”

  “Don’t sound so surprised.” Daisy lifted and lowered the phone so Tabitha watched her face go distant then right up close.

  “You’re freaking me out doing that.”

  “I know. You know how much I hate these things. Does my double chin look bigger?”

  Tabitha rolled her eyes. “Seriously?”

  “I’ll shut up.”

  “How’s school?” Tabitha asked.

  “You’re sounding like a mom.”

  Tabitha glared at her and Daisy’s brows went up. “Wow, all right, all right already. School is great, actually. Sure, we’re not exactly in the open arms of the Dogs but there haven’t been any fights. The Quad has been doing okay. Again, we’ve held up our end. I know Ryan wants a piece of Anthony but it seems a lot of people are pissed at him. With how quiet everything is, I’m starting to think you’re the trouble causer.”

  “Don’t start,” she said.

  “I’m only stating a fact,” Daisy said, laughing. “In all seriousness, how are you holding up? I know this has to be bringing up some hard shit.”

  “It is. I’m doing okay. It’s Simon I’m worried about. The club is always around. They have a reason to stop by. I think the strangest thing I’ve seen so far is Dick and Martha offering mediation with Lexie. It seems to help, though.”

  “I remember you telling me Dick’s into holistic stuff now, right?”

  “Yep. Seems that way. I asked about it, and he told me to have lived and survived through some of the crap he has, he has to believe in a higher power.”

  “Deep,” Daisy said.

  “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

  “So has this helped you to make a firm decision?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Come on, Tabs. You and I both know that you’re there for two reasons. To be there for Simon during this time, but to also figure out if you can become his old lady. I’m not an idiot. I know exactly what you’re doing. I think all of us know what you’re doing.”

  Tabitha groaned and sat up. “It wasn’t my intention.”

  “But you’re doing it?” Daisy asked.

  “It’s … hard.” She wrinkled her nose.

  “How?”

  “I don’t know.” She glanced around her room. Simon was out with Devil doing some club stuff. Lexie was already in bed, and Tabitha had all the children monitors in her room in case anyone ever needed her. Josh asked if she wanted to watch a movie, but she’d refused, and he’d gone to bed in a sulk. “I guess because I miss you guys so much.”

  “Don’t go blaming us. That’s not fair.”

  “I’m not blaming you. Far from it.”

  “I hear blame in that voice.”

  She snorted. “You’re being a bitch.”

  “You love me for it.”

  “You’re right, I do. Any new developments with Anthony?”

  Daisy’s smile faded. “Don’t start.”

  “Come on, don’t be so obtuse about this.”

  “Obtuse?”

  “I’ve decided to start using a new vocabulary. What do you think?”

  “I think your vocabulary is certainly not obtuse.” Daisy winked at her.

  Tabitha scrunched up her nose and stuck her tongue out. “Bitch. I know you’re trying to change the subject.”

  “I’m not. Me and Anthony, supposing he talks. If he likes a girl, wouldn’t he talk?” she asked.

  “He does talk.”

  “To you. Have you ever thought he has a crush on you?”

  “Not at all. Believe me. He totally digs you. Don’t you like that?”

  “I don’t know what I like,” Daisy said. “It’s easier to just see him as a friend.”

  “Why don’t you ask him out on a date?” Tabitha asked.

  “I’m not doing that.” Daisy jerked back, shaking her head.

  “Why not?” She moved to sit up against her bed.

  “A girl doesn’t ask. I mean, sure, I’m all for taking control of our lives, but come on, you can’t be serious. What if he rejects me?”

  “I guarantee he won’t. Oh, and when you ask, have me there so I can watch.”

  “You’re not even in the same town, weirdo,” Daisy said.

  Tabitha couldn’t stop smiling. “That’s what cell phones are for, nerd.”

  “I miss you. I miss this.”

  “Me too.”

  “I hate to say this, but I want you to come home.”

  “Soon,” Tabitha said. She couldn’t get away from the fact she was getting homesick. Even though she got to see Simon every single day, she missed home.

  “You’ve gone all
sad and I feel like crying. We’re not going to cry. What am I going to do if he turns me down flat?” Daisy asked. “I don’t think I can handle that.”

  “How about this, if Anthony turns you down, I will totally freak out my parents in a bikini and dance. Maybe even do a striptease.”

  “Really?”

  “Yep, I will make sure I get grounded for my entire life.”

  “You’re that confident he’s going to say yes?” Daisy asked.

  “You know me. I won’t make bets I won’t win.” Tabitha smiled. “Come on, you’ve got to ask him.”

  “And if he does say yes?”

  “You go on a date and tell me all about it. Even if he kisses you, I want to know.”

  “But … I don’t know. I’ve never been on a date.”

  “And you think I have?” Tabitha frowned. “Wow, I have never been on a date.”

  “You and Simon are always together.”

  “Exactly, we’re never on a date. This sucks. Like big time. I’m going to force him to take me on a date.” She nodded her head. “That’s what I’m going to do.”

  Daisy giggled. “I have a feeling Simon is going to hate me.”

  “Not if he loves me he’s not. I’m going on a date and there’s going to be flowers.”

  ****

  Simon was nervous.

  He hated to be this way, especially with Tabby. She wanted to go on a date. She’d been so freaking fierce about it that it had kind of concerned him. He figured they were living their lives as constant dates but according to Tabby, he was getting out of everything, and he didn’t want to disappoint her. So, he’d done the only thing he could and went to his dad.

  Devil had helped him to buy some flowers and even rented a suit. Now he felt like a fucking penguin, and he held a bouquet of flowers that cost a fortune. He stood in his dad’s office.

  “Don’t laugh,” Simon said.

  “I’m not laughing.”

  “You’re a terrible liar.” He glared at his dad while trying not to wriggle in this suit. “How do men wear these things?”

  “You look…”

  “Just say it.”

  “You look smart. It does suit you.”

  “Ha ha. You’re taking pictures for the guys.”

  Devil already had his phone in the air, snapping them. “I’ve got to keep these kinds of memories, son. You know that.”

  Simon rolled his eyes. “I hate you right now.”

  “That’s your prerogative.”

  Lexie knocked on the door, gaining their attention. “She’s ready and she’s nervous.”

  “How can she possibly be nervous? This was her idea.”

  “I taught you better than that. Every girl will be nervous on her first date. Accept it.” Lexie walked into the room and moved toward him. “You look handsome.”

  “Thanks, Mom.”

  Lexie sighed. “I can’t … you make me so proud.”

  His stomach twisted. In the past few weeks, she’d been making comments that always made him think she believed she was going to die.

  Wrapping his arms around her, he held on to her, not squeezing too tightly when that was all he wanted to do.

  Be a man. Don’t be a pussy. She’s your mom. She’s going to fight this.

  Simon pulled away. “Do you think the flowers are too much?”

  “No, go and see her reaction,” Lexie said. “She’s waiting. Simon, she’s special. Treat her right.”

  “Always.”

  Leaving his father’s office, he found her sitting on the stairs, and she quickly stood. She wasn’t wearing The Skulls’ leather cut.

  “Wow,” she said.

  “Wow.” He pointed at her. “You look…”

  “Like a dork?” She tugged at the bottom of the dress. It was a beautiful pink floral dress.

  “No, you look beautiful.”

  She glanced down at herself. “You always say that.”

  “But you do, to me. You always are beautiful and I love it when you smile like that.”

  Devil cleared his throat. “We’ll be waiting for your return.” He dangled the car keys from his fingers. “Slow and steady. You’ve been taught.”

  “I will. I’ll keep her safe.”

  “Have fun,” Lexie said.

  “We will.” Simon looked at the flowers. “These are for you.”

  Tabby laughed. “They’re beautiful.”

  Lexie took them. “I’ll put them in some water for you.”

  “Thank you.”

  Putting a hand on her back, Simon walked out of the house and went to the car. He opened the passenger door and Tabby climbed in.

  He took a deep breath, the nerves getting to him. He waved at his parents just as he got behind the wheel.

  “They’re still watching,” Tabby said.

  “I know.” He pulled out of the driveway. “I booked us a seat at a restaurant in town. It’s a cute little Italian place. They’re the only ones who were willing to do vegetarian meals.”

  “Thank you, Simon.”

  “Anything for you.” He took her hand, locking their fingers together.

  “Your hand’s a little sweaty.”

  “I’m nervous. I thought I was the best kind of boyfriend in the world.”

  “You are and don’t let anyone else tell you any different. You’re awesome.” She rested her head on his shoulder. He could do this.

  ****

  “Tabitha is going to keep him on his toes,” Lexie said.

  “Count on it. She has got that boy so twisted up, but at least it’s keeping him out of trouble.”

  “She’s struggling, though, Devil. You can see that.”

  Devil wrapped his arms around his wife. The headlights of the car had already faded in the distance. “I know.”

  “Do you think allowing her to come here and help was a mistake?” Lexie asked, turning to look at him.

  “Do you want the truth?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I do and I don’t.”

  “That’s one way of avoiding the answers,” Lexie said, smiling.

  He cupped her cheek. The love he had for this woman. “I don’t think we made a mistake because she needs to realize what kind of future she has. Being with Simon means a choice has to be made. This is her one and only chance to realize that. She’s a Skull. We all knew this day would come. We can’t keep avoiding it. I expected Simon to move on. To find a girl in high school, or several girls, but it’s Tabitha he wants, and the only person he seems to think about. We can’t change that.”

  Lexie sighed. “I hate this. They are going to have such a hard time. We all know this and we’re only now thinking about it.”

  He held her close. “Tell me what you want me to do.”

  “Nothing. There’s nothing we can do. Unless there’s a chance of you and Lash coming to some agreement.”

  “No.”

  “Then no, Devil. I know the club means the world to you, and I love you. This is the challenge they’re going to have to face.” She cupped his face. “Take me indoors. It’s cold.”

  ****

  Twenty minutes later

  “You hate this,” Tabitha said, looking over her menu at her date.

  “No, it’s fine.”

  “It’s not fine, you’re wriggling.” She looked at where his finger was digging into his neck. She pressed her lips together.

  “You’re finding this really funny.”

  “I’m sorry. I can’t seem to help it.”

  “This isn’t funny.”

  “It is a little funny.” She lifted up the menu and then shook her head. “Let me.” She leaned over the table and unbuttoned the top two, relieving his neck. “There, how is that?”

  “Does it still look neat?”

  “Simon, stop it. I wanted you to take me on a date, not dress up like someone I don’t know. You look handsome, dashing. Stop worrying so much. Please. You’re actually making me nervous.”

  “I am nervous. I though
t we’d been on dates before.”

  “We have in a way, but nothing like this. Now, pick up your menu.” She’d noticed the moment they entered the restaurant some of the couples had stopped eating to watch them. This was what she was used to. Even back home in a town that accepted them, there were a few people who didn’t like to mingle with them.

  Glancing over the menu, she went straight to the vegetarian section.

  “I’m ready to order if you are.”

  Simon looked toward their waiter, who immediately came to their table. He gave his order and Tabitha asked for hers, offering up the menu. She settled on a chocolate pudding for dessert.

  Linking her fingers together in her lap, she stared across the candlelit table. “This is nice.”

  “It is?” he asked.

  “The suit aside, you and me, out to dinner. Come on, tell me you don’t like this.”

  Simon reached across the table, taking her fingers. His touch made her ache all over. Locking their fingers together, he cleared his throat.

  “I love this. I love being with you.”

  “But?”

  “There’s not a but.”

  “I know you. Come on, tell me.”

  Simon sighed. “Fine. To me, every single day is a date with you. I don’t take a moment with you for granted. I mean, I know some people would think it’s stupid, but with how we grew up, the danger, I know how precious it is to be with people you love. One moment they can be taken from you and you won’t even see it coming. It’s why I love being with you every chance I have. Eating barbeque is still being a date. Even at home, sitting opposite you, playing footsie, it’s like a chance again. We only get so short a time, Tabby. Yeah, this makes me nervous, but I’m with you.”

  She lifted her glass of water, taking a sip.

  “You’re crying,” Simon said.

  She waved her hand in front of her face. Lexie had helped her to do her makeup. “These are not sad tears. I’m happy. Like really happy. I didn’t realize you felt like that.”

  Simon ran his thumb across her knuckles. “I do. I’m not being cheap. If this is what you want, then I will give it to you every single week.”

  “I don’t need it every single week. I just, I wanted to go on a real date, but now I see I’ve been an idiot.”

  “You’re not.”

  “I am. Just being with you is enough. I don’t need all of this.”

  “We’ve ordered and you’re going to eat.” He laughed. “We don’t have our parents breathing down our necks, but I know for a fact Curse and Mia are eating somewhere in this restaurant.”