Adventures of Elegy Flynn

by Chambers, V. J.

  “Um...in Germany somewhere, I think?” I said.

  Her gaze flitted about her surroundings. She pointed. “This isn’t Germany.” She looked down at herself. “And what am I wearing? I look some kind of Duran Duran groupie.”

  “Well, I’ve always tried to tell you that,” I said. “Do you have amnesia, Elegy?”

  “How do you know my name?” she said. “Who are you?”

  “I’m Catherine. I’m your sidekick,” I said. Even though I hated it when she called me a sidekick. It seemed the easiest way to explain.

  Elegy made a face. She turned to Brody. “And you?”

  “I’m Brody. I’m a volur.”

  “Volur?” Horror appeared in Elegy’s eyes. “Then I’m... in a praxidikai?”

  Elegy had used that term to describe the bar before. “Yeah.”

  “I must have done something wrong to be punished like this,” Elegy said, covering her mouth with her hand. “The only good thing is that I can change the way all of this looks. Right now.”

  * * *

  The bar had morphed into a green garden, with a sparkling stream running through it. There were ornately carve stone benches that Elegy, Brody, and I sat on. Elegy was no longer in 1980s clothing, but instead wore a long white toga that hung over one of her shoulders. Her hair was tied into an elegant bun on top of her head. She looked regal and royal, the way a goddess should, I supposed. But she was acting very, very strangely.

  “Why would I do any of that?” said Elegy. “Why would I have a relationship with a mortal or make my praxidikai look like a bar or wear awful clothes?”

  She did have amnesia, apparently, but it wasn’t total amnesia. She seemed to have wiped out a huge portion of her life. She knew who she was, but she didn’t remember anything besides being a Fate. She didn’t remember my brother. She didn’t remember being punished to fix time paradoxes. She didn’t remember that she loved the eighties. This was a younger Elegy Flynn.

  “You’ve always been this way,” I said. “I don’t know.”

  “Well, it’s positively horrid,” said Elegy. “I’ve become sordid and laughable. I never thought I’d sink so low.”

  Neither Brody nor I seemed to know what to say.

  “I serve alcohol?” said Elegy, looking scandalized. “I mix drinks?”

  “Um, yeah,” said Brody.

  “How common.” Elegy shivered. She stood up. “If you’ll excuse me, this is all a bit much to take. I’m going to walk a little.” She set off into the pretty garden she’d created for herself.

  Brody and I sat on the benches and watched her go.

  “What happened to her?” I said.

  “I don’t know,” he said. “Something made her lose her memory, though.” He took my hand. “You okay?”

  I liked the way his hand felt around mine. It was so much larger and stronger, and I peered down at the little red hairs on his knuckles. I smiled up at him.

  He dropped my hand. “Sorry. I keep forgetting we’re not...”

  “Not what?” I said.

  “Do you remember what Elegy said before this happened? About Meurtia?”

  So he was going to avoid the subject, was he? I sighed. “I sort of remember. But I don’t understand any of it.”

  “Meurtia is another Fate,” said Brody. “I’ve worked with her before to fix paradoxes. Elegy said she was close, and that I had to get to her. That has to mean that her praxidikai is nearby. I’ve got to leave and go look for it.”

  I peered around the garden. “Leave how? There’s no door anymore.”

  Brody pointed across the garden at a rod iron gate, crawling with ivy. “I think that’s the way out, actually.”

  “So, you’re just going to go? You’re going to leave me alone with Amnesiac Elegy?”

  “Well, you can’t leave here,” said Brody, “so you can’t come with me. If Meurtia can help, then I have to try.”

  I bit my lip. “You think Meurtia could get Elegy back to normal?”

  He shrugged. “Maybe. I hope so.” He stood up. “You’ll be fine here. It’s still Elegy, even if she doesn’t remember anything.”

  That was true, but Elegy seemed completely different. I stood up too. “Are you going to bring Meurtia back here?”

  “I don’t know. The Fates are tied to their praxidikai. You know how Elegy can’t leave the bar? Well, Meurtia can’t leave her praxidikai either.”

  “What’s hers look like? I heard that someone has a hair salon.”

  Brody rolled his eyes. “Clothos.” He tapped his temple. “She’s a little nuts.”

  “More nuts than Elegy? Is that possible?”

  He laughed. “Meurtia’s praxidikai is just like a house. She’s got a nice parlor to receive the volurs. I’ve never seen the rest of it.”

  “Boring,” I said.

  He shrugged. “Yeah. Pretty much.” He shot a glance over at the gate. “Okay, I’ll be back. If for some reason Meurtia can come back here, remember that you need to stay out of sight. She can’t know you’re still alive.”

  I nodded. “I’ll be careful.”

  “Good.” He leaned it and kissed me quickly on the lips, as if it was as natural as breathing. “Love you.”

  I put my fingers to my lips, feeling stunned.

  He cringed. “Damn it, I keep forgetting you’re not my girlfriend yet.”

  “I’m your girlfriend?” I murmured.

  “Damn it.” He ran a hand through his hair. “So that’s the first time I kissed you, huh? That was a terrible first kiss.” He turned and started across the garden, muttering to himself.

  I ran after him and grabbed him by the shoulder. “Well, maybe we should try again?” I presented my lips to him expectantly.

  “No,” he said. “This is all wrong. You can’t start kissing me because I’m telling you that you’ll care about me in the future. You have to develop feelings for me.”

  “I’m developing them,” I said. There was something about a hot guy telling you he loved you out of the blue that—actually, that sounded like usually it would be completely creepy. Maybe it was only that I was curious. Why did I like this guy? Why did he like me?

  He smiled at me. “I can’t kiss under pressure. Watch Elegy, okay? Whatever happens, don’t let her move the bar.” He looked around. “The garden. Whatever it is.”

  I nodded.

  Brody strode through the gate and disappeared. I turned and walked through the garden until I found Elegy, who was sitting on a bench, gazing out over the garden with a mournful expression on her face.

  “You okay?” I said.

  She didn’t even look at me. “Who are you, anyway? The other man was a volur. You’re not. You’re just a normal human. What are you doing here?”

  “Well, it’s a long story,” I said. “You saved my life, because I’m the sister of the guy you fell in love with. The one that got you sentenced to fixing time paradoxes.”

  She turned to me sharply. “You’re supposed to be dead?”

  I nodded. “But I’m not, thanks to you.”

  Her eyes widened. “That’s awful. I changed the threads of Fate! I ruined everything. What have I become? How could I change into someone who rebels against all the very things I valued the most?”

  I wasn’t sure what to say. “Well, it’s not that bad, Elegy. Fate’s cruel sometimes. You make things better.”

  She put a finger in my face. “It is not about being cruel or kind. Some things simply have to happen.”

  “Why?” I said. Maybe this version of Elegy would explain things without insulting me for being stupid.

  But Elegy only sputtered. “Why? What a stupid question. There is no why. Fate simply is.”

  Okay, clearly not. “You’re really not that different after all.”

  “My future self has become infected with you humans,” said Elegy. “It’s disgusting. Fates can’t become involved with human emotion. There’s no place for that in our world. We are impartial and all-knowing. If we des
cend to the level of humanity, we degrade ourselves.”

  “Well, there must have been something about my brother that changed your mind, I guess,” I said.

  “I can’t imagine what,” said Elegy. She eyed me. “You shouldn’t even be alive. I can’t allow you to remain in my praxidikai any longer.”

  “But if I leave, I’ll die,” I said.

  “And you are supposed to be dead, are you not?”

  I gulped. “You’re going to kill me?”

  “I’m going to right the wrong that I caused by saving your life,” she said. “It’s your fate to die, so die you shall. Now tell me where and when to take you, so that you can greet your fate properly.”

  “You think I’m going to tell you that?” I said. “You’re crazy.” All right, this wasn’t going well. What if Elegy threw me out of the garden gate because I wasn’t supposed to be alive? Would the Fates vaporize me right away or I would I somehow be sucked back into my old life? Would I have to experience Richard beating me to death?

  Elegy stood up and advanced on me.

  I backed away.

  Elegy’s eyes glowed white. The garden became windy, and the sky turned black and stormy. She stretched her arms out, seeming to grow taller and more menacing.

  I tripped over my feet as I tried to get away from her. “This is like what you did when you scrambled Shakespeare’s brains, isn’t it?”

  Elegy sank back to normal. The sky cleared. She looked horrified. “I scrambled William Shakespeare’s brains?”

  “Well, you fixed it,” I said. “But at first you did, yeah.”

  “Why would I do such a thing?”

  “Um, you were mad at him because he was being a huge dick to a volur.”

  Elegy’s eyes widened. “But that’s absolutely idiotic. Why would I endanger the proper path of history simply to punish one mortal’s transgressions?”

  “Uh, I guess you liked the volur?” I wasn’t really sure why she’d done it myself.

  Elegy shuddered. “How can I have become so sickeningly human?”

  “Well, you’re really not very human,” I said. “I mean, I think you’re pretty weird. And you’re not really that nice most of the time. You call me names a lot, and you don’t seem to care about the feelings of the volurs you’re sleeping with—”

  “What?”

  “Uh...”

  “Sleeping with? You’re telling me I engage in sexual intercourse?”

  I nodded. “Is that a thing most Fates don’t do?”

  “Of course not.”

  “So, how do you make baby Fates then?”

  She gave me a withering look.

  “Don’t you guys have to reproduce?” I thought about it. “Actually, are all the Fates female?”

  “We are immortal beings,” said Elegy.”There is no need for reproduction.”

  “Right, well, I guess you mostly do it for fun anyway, since you told me no one could get pregnant in the bar.” I shrugged.

  “Stop calling it a bar,” said Elegy. “I will never let my praxidikai look like that ever again.”

  I heard the sound of the gate swinging open. “Elegy?” called Brody’s voice. “I know you’re all alone in here, and Meurtia is with me. Her praxidikai is docked right up against yours.”

  Crap. I needed to hide. I darted away from Elegy and crouched behind a bush a few feet away. I could watch what was happening through the leaves, but they couldn’t see me.

  “Where are you going?” Elegy yelled after me. She turned to face Brody and Meurtia as they approached. Meurtia looked exactly the way Elegy did now. She was wearing a toga, had her hair in an elaborate updo. They looked like sisters. Maybe the Fates were sisters. I didn’t know. “I’m not alone, you know. That girl—”

  “Of course you’re not alone anymore,” said Brody. “We’re here now.” He gave Meurtia a concerned look. “She’s pretty confused, as you can see.”

  Meurtia pursed her lips, staring at Elegy. “Tell me exactly what happened again, Brody.”

  “She was moving the bar,” said Brody, “and then suddenly she choked and started coughing. She said I needed to come find you.”

  “I don’t understand,” said Meurtia. “What happened to her?”

  “She’s not herself,” said Brody. “She seems to have lost her memory.”

  “Well, it’s really fine,” said Elegy, “because I’d rather not remember all those horrible things I’ve done. Really. Sexual relations with mortals? Ugh.” Elegy gagged.

  Meurtia raised her eyebrows. “Really, Elegy? You’ve been doing things like that? How?”

  “The volurs,” said Elegy. “Or so they tell me, anyway.”

  “They?” said Meurtia.

  “She means me,” said Brody, who was turning red. “She’s confused, like I told you.”

  Meurtia turned her head slowly to Brody. “You told her that she’d had sex with volurs?”

  “Uh... it sort of came up in conversation,” said Brody.

  “With you?”

  Brody fidgeted. “Is this really all that important?”

  Meurtia patted Elegy on the shoulder. “I think it’s just wishful thinking on this young man’s part, Elegy.” She wagged a finger in Brody’s face. “Shame on you for having fun at her expense.”

  Brody folded his arms over his chest. “Right. I made it all up,” he said in a flat voice.

  “It wasn’t him that told me,” said Elegy. “It was the girl.”

  “There’s no girl, Elegy,” said Brody. “Just me and you here. That’s all.”

  “There is a girl,” said Elegy. “She’s hiding—”

  “Nope,” said Brody. He turned to Meurtia. “You see why I’m worried?”

  Meurtia knitted her eyebrows. She leaned close to Brody. “Did you make it up? Or were you really intimate with Elegy?”

  Brody pulled away from her. “I thought we were done talking about that.”

  “Did it work okay?” Meurtia wanted to know. “The two of you had...compatible parts?”

  Brody raised his eyebrows. “Um...”

  Meurtia shook her head. “And there haven’t been any consequences for her doing that, I don’t suppose. Why would there be? The volurs certainly wouldn’t complain. I suppose we could all do it if we wanted, couldn’t we?” She smiled at Brody.

  Brody backed further away. “Yeah, well, you know, it really was just wishful thinking on my part, actually. I’m awful. She’s just, you know, so attractive and all that.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “Listen, she seemed to think you could help her.”

  “Elegy’s always pushing the boundaries,” said Meurtia. “Breaking all the rules.”

  “I’m not a rule breaker,” said Elegy.

  Meurtia threw back her head and laughed. “You really do have amnesia.”

  “Well,” said Elegy. “Clearly, I’m a rule breaker now. But I don’t remember breaking any of those rules. And I want to mend my ways. Which is why we need to find that girl—”

  “There’s no girl,” Brody insisted. “Meurtia, there is one other thing she said before this happened. She said something about doubling over herself or through herself... Does that mean anything?”

  Meurtia considered. Then her eyes lit up. “Have she ever had the praxidikai in this general vicinity before?”

  “Well, yeah,” said Brody, “we were saving Hitler again. She’s been through that tons of times.”

  “The praxidikai crossed itself,” said Meurtia. “It occupied the same space and time for a brief moment. You didn’t notice it because mortals can’t feel dimensions like that, but it would have had quite an effect on Elegy. When this happens, amnesia is typical.”

  “Is there anything we can do about it?” said Brody.

  Meurtia nodded. “I can restore her memory. As a Fate, I have that power. Give me your hand, Elegy.”

  “I don’t want my memory restored,” said Elegy, shaking her head. “I don’t want to become that horrible whore again, changing human’s
fates like that girl in here, who’s supposed to be dead.”

  “There’s no girl.” Brody’s voice was firm.

  “There is a girl,” said Elegy. “She ran off just when you came in. She needs to be returned to her life and live out her fate. That’s the order of the universe.”

  Meurtia looked at Brody. “What’s she talking about?”

  Brody shrugged. “I have no idea.”

  “That’s odd,” said Meurtia, “because she shouldn’t have become delusional. Crossing herself should have wiped her memory, but not made her crazy.”

  “I’m not crazy,” said Elegy. “Help me find her, Meurtia. She said she’s the sister of that man I apparently fell in love with. The thing I did to get myself stuck in this praxidikai in the first place.”

  Meurtia looked alarmed. “You say she’s supposed to be dead?”

  “Can you just help Elegy, please?” said Brody. “Never mind her crazy talk.”

  Meurtia turned to Brody. “Well, perhaps she hid this girl from you, Brody. Perhaps, if she really did interfere with her fate, she wouldn’t have wanted anyone to know. Maybe there is a girl, but you’ve never seen her.”

  This wasn’t good. Behind the bush where I hid, I held my breath. What would happen if Meurtia found me? Elegy has specifically said that Meurtia shouldn’t see me, so it couldn’t be anything good. She would want to kill me, wouldn’t she? I didn’t want to die.

  Brody shook his head. “Elegy’s not exactly a secretive person. I don’t think she hid anything from me.”

  “Oh, he knows all about her,” said Elegy. “He’s lying to you, because he doesn’t want anything to happen to her. Humans get so attached to each other, you know?”

  Meurtia’s expression grew stormy. “You’re lying to me, Brody?”

  Brody clasped his hands together. “Help Elegy. If we get her back to normal, we can sort all of this out.”

  Elegy stalked away from them, heading straight for me. “I’m back to normal now. Whatever I’ve done since has been a bout of madness. This is the real me. And I’m going to find this girl, so we can send her back to her fate.”

  I needed to move, didn’t I? I glanced around. Where could I go? There were other bushes, but if I ran for one, I’d expose myself.