Tapout

by J.C. Valentine

  Jami’s brows knit together in confusion. When he looked down at the woman by his side, she was completely rigid, her eyes wide as plates. What the hell?

  Tony was still talking. “Shame about your apartment. Funny how a little leak can turn into such a big mess. Seems luck hasn’t been on your side lately, has it, sweetheart?”

  Red blurred his vision, and Jami felt his body shift. Nobody called his girl sweetheart but him. Only the feel of Alyson’s restraining hand on the center of his chest stopped him. “Jami, don’t.” Her watery eyes pleaded with him. “Please don’t,” she said her voice a tiny whisper.

  “Yes, Jami, please don’t,” Tony mocked. “It will be so much more satisfying if we both save it for the ring.” Rubbing his hands together, Tony took one more look around and chirped. “Well, looks like my job is done here. Nice place, by the way. You’ll certainly need it to fall back on after I win, and everyone realizes you’re nothing to write home about.” With a smile, he began backing away. “That is, assuming you actually make it to the ring. Take care of those hands.” With a too-wide grin and a salute, Tony walked through the double glass doors.

  In less than five minutes, he had managed to turn their world upside down.

  Jami glared after him, the urge to kill almost too strong to ignore. A small voice wrestled for his attention.

  “Jami?”

  He could hear the sadness and fear in her tremulous voice, but for once, he wasn’t feeling much in the way of sympathy. Unable to look at her, Jami kept his face turned away. “Is what he said true?”

  “Jami, please—”

  “Did you lose your job?”

  Her breath stuttered out of her, and she moved to stand in front of him. Jami kept his gaze carefully fixed on a point just beyond her head. “Please look at me?” He repeated the question, his voice stark. Still, she didn’t answer. Sniffling, she repeated, “Please—”

  The leash Jami had on his temper snapped, and his eyes jumped to hers. “Fuck please!” She flinched, and for a split second, he almost backed down. But then he didn’t. She didn’t deserve his pity. His words came out slow and brutal. “Did. You. Lose. Your. Fucking job?”

  Her tiny fist knotted in his shirt, her bottom lip quivering as she nodded.

  “How? What happened? Is this because of Tori and Miles?” Two lone tears streaked down her now pale cheeks. She didn’t speak, but she didn’t need to. He saw the answer in her eyes. “God dammit! I told you this would happen!” Jami wheeled away, breaking her hold on him. He stabbed his fingers through his hair in frustration, anger, aggravation, dismay. So many emotions rushing through him, he didn’t know what to do with them all.

  Every eye in the place was zeroed in on them. Every piece of machinery had ceased movement, eliminating the constant whir of noise he’d grown accustomed to hearing. The attention only fueled his anger. The damage was done. Might as well go all the way and finish it.

  Facing Ally again, he pointed at her and shouted, “You lied to me! Right to my face, you lied. Take the day off?” he scoffed, recalling asking her that morning and her answer. A humorless laugh bubbled past his lips. “You don’t have a fucking job! How long did you think you could keep this from me? Do you think I’m an idiot? One thing I asked of you—no lies.”

  He was rambling, his words coming out in a constant stream. Lies were a part of life, but he’d thought—stupidly—that Alyson was above that. That when it came to them, she would hold him to a higher regard. Betrayal didn’t even touch what he was feeling.

  Her whole body shaking, Ally sobbed before him. He wanted to reach out and wrap her up in his arms, tell her everything would be okay.

  But that would be a lie.

  And he didn’t tell lies.

  Don approached with caution. “Come on, son. Everyone is watching.” With his hand on his shoulder, he urged him toward the door. Jami’s feet obeyed.

  “Jami, wait!” Ally reached out, grasping his arm. Red-rimmed green eyes peered up at him. “Please, I’m sorry I lied. I didn’t mean to. I—”

  The words fell out of his mouth before he could stop them—cold and unyielding. “It’s over, Ally. You should call, Liv.” Shrugging her duffle from his shoulder, he held it out to her. With trembling hands, she took it. A frozen knot of hurt and anger wrapped up in a healthy dose of indifference formed in his chest as he turned away. Hearing Ally choke on a pitiful sob, he didn’t look back. Squaring his shoulders, Jami walked out into the glaring afternoon sun.

  TWENTY

  The phone stared back at her, silent and mocking. Alyson’s eyes were dry and swollen, her nose stuffy, and her heart sore.

  “Have you tried calling him?” Olivia sat beside her, also staring at the phone that refused to ring, no matter how hard she willed it to do so.

  “Called, texted,” Alyson croaked. “He’s ignoring me.”

  “Maybe he just has his phone turned off?” her friend offered, but Alyson knew the truth. Jami didn’t want to talk to her. She lied, and he was done. Could she really blame him? Getting no response, Olivia sighed and dropped her head back on the couch. “Men.” That one word pretty much summed it up.

  Had Jami stuck around a little longer, she might have been able to explain why she had chosen to keep the truth from him. It had been a lie, yes, but one of omission. It came from a good place, though. She didn’t want to add any more stress to the heaps he already had to deal with. It didn’t seem right.

  Okay, yes, lying had also saved her from a scene like the one he made at the gym, but she would have faced it—eventually. And considering his reaction, her fears had been warranted.

  Damn Tony Michaels for coming in when he did. She’d replayed his visit multiple times, every move, every word. It was painfully obvious that his silence over the last month hadn’t been because he’d simply left them alone to live their lives. No. He was plotting, putting wheels in motion that would ensure their lives exploded right in front of their eyes. Without a doubt, Alyson knew he was behind her being fired. The smug smirk he wore said it all.

  But what about what he said about her apartment? Could he be behind that, too? A leak seemed so benign, a fluke, all chalked up to a simple case of old, leaky pipes. But was it really? She wouldn’t put it past Tony to be behind that, too. The man reeked of menace.

  She thought of Victoria and Miles and wondered how they were doing. She hadn’t spoken to either of them for a while. Had Tori made up her mind? Had she gone back to her husband? The thought sickened her, so she pushed it away.

  There was too much going on in her life to worry about everyone else’s problems. She had to focus on fixing her own before she could deal with anymore. It was the first time in a long time that she was putting herself first.

  “Do you think they left already?” Olivia’s voice carried softly in the quiet of her condo, her focus now on the digital clock displayed on the cable box.

  Alyson’s mouth formed a tight line. Where had the afternoon gone? A quick glance out the window revealed the sun had gone down, leaving darkness in its wake. The empty pit in her stomach grew. “I don’t know,” she admitted. “Jami never told me the details.” He could very well be sitting at home, unharmed, or he could be in a car, on his way to drop the cash at Marco’s feet. Either way, she didn’t like it.

  Alyson wanted to be there for him, with him. The not knowing was the worst. It threatened another crying jag, and she just didn’t think her tear ducts could handle another round.

  “I hope they’re all right,” Liv said, scraping her teeth over her bottom lip.

  Alyson whole-heartedly agreed. Any other outcome would be unbearable. Still, for Olivia to say that… “You love him,” Alyson stated.

  Olivia’s head whipped around, her blonde hair floating around her shoulders. “Jami? Of course not! Why would you even say such a thing?”

  A tiny hint of a smile touched Alyson’s lips. “No, Spencer. You love him, don’t you?”

  Liv’s eyes closed, and she rested
her head back against the cushions. “I can’t help it. I’ve tried to stop, but…”

  Yeah, but. Alyson got what she was saying perfectly. Spencer and Jami… they were the kind of men women panted after. They stole hearts and broke them under their boot heels without even having to try. Alyson was beginning to wonder if she should have just walked away in the beginning, never accepted that invitation. If she had, she wouldn’t be feeling like her heart had been ripped from her chest now, but then she wouldn’t have experienced what it felt like to truly love someone. And she would have always wondered… what if?

  It was an impossible situation. Her vision began to blur. “If you could do it all over again, would you make the same choices?”

  Olivia didn’t answer right away, giving the question some serious consideration. Finally, she said, “Yes, I think I would.”

  Rolling her head to the side, Alyson looked at her. “How can you say that, after everything Spencer has put you through? All the lies, his disappearing acts, now this?”

  Twisting sideways, Olivia rested her elbow on the back of the couch and propped her cheek on her fist. “When we got together, Spencer was great. He was so sweet. We talked all the time, and he listened. No guy has ever just listened, you know?” Her eyes glazed over, her thoughts a million miles away. Then she blinked and was back. “It wasn’t all bad. Actually, when it was good, it was so good. We even discussed marriage and family once.” Her eyes glittered, her smile wistful.

  Alyson listened, stunned. “You never told me that before.”

  Olivia shrugged. “Yeah, well, you weren’t exactly around.” Alyson grimaced, knowing she was right. She’d chosen Jami and work over her friendship. “But I get it. I probably would have done the same given your position. Jami seems like the kind of guy who you could get absorbed in.”

  Alyson couldn’t argue with that. When she was with Jami, the rest of the world ceased to exist. “So… what happened?”

  “What you already know happened. Spencer started staying out later, breaking dates, running off in the middle of everything. I didn’t know he was gambling, but I suspected he was into something. Too many red flags.” Alyson nodded. She’d caught those, too. They were hard to miss.

  “Why did you stay with him?” Alyson told herself she was asking out of curiosity, but a small part of her needed to know, needed to compare, to be sure that she wasn’t holding onto Jami for all the wrong reasons.

  “I loved him.”

  Eyebrows furrowing, Alyson asked, “That’s it? It’s that simple?”

  Olivia cast a warm, knowing smile at her. “Yes, absolutely.” Taking her hand, Olivia gripped her fingers tight. “Ally, I love Spencer. Like, really love him. I was willing to see him through all of this, and I still am. If he hadn’t called us off, I would still be there by his side, helping him through this. But he won’t let me, so here I am. It kills me every day, knowing that I lost him, but there’s nothing I can do about it.”

  “Is that why you gave him the money?”

  She sighed, and answered pensively, “Yes, and before you ask why, I did it because I had to. I can deal with our not being together, as long as I know he’s out there somewhere. What I can’t deal with is him being gone and knowing I could have done something to prevent it.”

  Suddenly, Jami’s words made sense. He’d said much the same thing a few days ago. Alyson squeezed Liv’s hand. “Do you think you’ll be able to work it out? Do you even want to?”

  Olivia sucked in a breath and blew it out in a rush. “I don’t know. Sometimes I think I do, and other times I don’t. But it’s not even up to me. Spencer is the one who left. What about you?” she asked, turning the question back around. “If Jami suddenly decides that he overreacted, which he totally did, and begs you to come back, will you take him?”

  Alyson looked away, her lungs constricting. “I don’t know. I want to say yes, but the more I think, the more I wonder. Are we a good fit? I think yes, we are, but then I remember how much we fight. We’re a lot alike, maybe too much alike. We both have short fuses, and we both react without thinking…” Her thoughts trailed off as she tried to picture a future without Jami in it. It was too bleak to look at for long.

  “It’s okay,” Liv said, patting the top of her hand. “I understand.” They sat in silence, staring down the clock as the minutes ticked by, both of them lost in thought.

  Soon, Jami, Spencer, and Don would be looking danger in the face, and only time would tell how they would come out of it. As much as Olivia and Alyson wanted to be there, to make sure their men were okay, they were shut out, forced to sit back and wait and wonder and worry, with no promise of answers one way or the other. Once again, they had become each other’s only source of comfort.

  ***

  The soft pink glow of the restaurant sign lit the immediate area in front of the building. The entire face of the brownstone structure was made of large panes of glass, providing an unobstructed view of the interior. For a weeknight, Busters was packed. A line formed all the way to the door, every table filled.

  “There’s no way we’re getting in there,” Don observed. Earlier, they’d decided the best way to do this was to do it smart. Since Marco didn’t know who Jami and Don were, he couldn’t identify them. So, they’d decided they could keep a better eye on Spencer from inside rather than waiting in the car.

  “Yeah…” Jami stared at the growing crowd of patrons, his brain working overtime to come up with a solution. Eventually, he gave up, conceding that he was decidedly unimaginative. “Plan B?” he inquired, but a quick look at Don and Spencer told him they were as fresh out of ideas as he was.

  “So we do this old school,” Spencer suggested, breaking the silence. “I go in, pass the money to Marco while you two stay here and keep the car running.”

  “Why? You think we’re going to need to make a quick getaway?” Jami smiled into the rearview mirror, but it didn’t reach his eyes. There was nothing funny about tonight, about any of this. They were all beyond tense.

  Spencer eyed the restaurant, his expression grim. “On a night like tonight, anything could happen.”

  Didn’t he know it. “All right, so you go in, do your thing, and Don and I will wait here, ready to burn rubber if necessary.” They waited as the clock on the dash inched closer to eight o’clock. Jami looked over his shoulder. Even cast in shadow, he could see the worried look in Spencer’s eyes. “Dude, we’re cool,” he attempted to reassure him. “This is simple. You pay the man and walk out. Done and over, right?”

  Spencer looked about as convinced as Jami was, which was not at all, but he nodded anyway. “Right. Yeah, man. In and out.”

  “You can do this, bro. You have your phone on?” Spencer held it up, the screen glowing blue. “Good. Call us if you need us. We’ll be in there before you can blink an eye.”

  Nodding again, Spencer unbuckled his seatbelt and reached for the door handle.

  “Wait.” Don’s stern voice froze Spencer on the spot. Shifting in his seat, Don studied him. “In and out. You give him the money and walk, got it?”

  “Got it.” Spencer’s head bobbled some more.

  “Don’t fuck this up, yeah?”

  “I won’t.”

  Jami smiled tightly as Spencer pushed open the door and stepped out of the car. Together, he and Don watched him cut through the maze of parked cars. “Did you have to be mean to him?”

  “Yes,” Don returned. “Trust me, that boy needs reminders.”

  “He hasn’t been a boy in a long time,” Jami told him, feeling the need to defend his friend.

  “Not in body, no, but right now, I question what’s going on upstairs.” He tapped his temple. “Best not to leave anything to chance.”

  Jami knew he was right. Of course, he knew it. This night wouldn’t be happening otherwise. He had to keep reminding himself that Spencer was like a drug addict or an alcoholic. One they’d just handed a shit ton of cash to. The hand he held the wheel with tightened until his
knuckles blanched. “Shit, we should be in there.”

  “Too late for that,” Don said gruffly. “Life is full of shoulda, woulda, coulda’s. If you took the time to tally them all up, you’d drive yourself right into a straightjacket.”

  Jami didn’t know how long they sat there, the low rumble of the engine idling serving as the only source of sound. Too long, if he had to guess. But then, any time waiting was required, the minutes on the clock seemed to stand still.

  A constant stream of people filtered in and out. Growing restless, Jami tried to think of something else to take his mind off the wait, but then his thoughts strayed to Ally, and he shut that shit down on the spot. Those were off limits. He had more than enough to deal with on his plate now without adding that heap of shit to it. He’d deal with her later.

  His hand twitched, his attention returning to the bustling restaurant before them. A glance at the clock revealed Spence had been gone for more than twenty minutes. “What is taking him so long?” he muttered. Then, because he couldn’t stand sitting there any longer without knowing, he turned to Don and said, “Enough of this shit. I’m going in. You coming?”

  Don’s countenance turned fierce. “Abso-fucking-lutely.”

  They had their hands on the door handle, ready to burst from the truck, when they caught sight of Spencer. He jogged toward them and looked like he’d shed some serious weight. Climbing into the back seat, the smile he wore was a stark contrast to the fear he’d given off before going inside.

  Jami and Don turned in their seats. “Everything good?” Jami asked him.

  The lights from the dashboard made his face glow green. “Fuck, yeah. Everything’s great,” Spencer said, breathless. His smile wouldn’t stop growing.

  Jami caught Don’s frown, felt its twin growing on his own face. “So it’s done?”

  “Totally done. Come on, man,” Spencer said, smacking his palms on the back of Jami’s seat in an excited rhythm. “Let’s get the hell out of here. I need a beer.”