Tapout

by J.C. Valentine

  Don gave Jami an uneasy look that reflected the questions now swirling through his head. Refusing to analyze them too closely, Jami turned the key and pulled out of the parking space. He just wanted to get out of there and put this whole clusterfuck of a day behind him.

  TWENTY-ONE

  Rain created a pitter-patter on the windowsill. In the distance, thunder rumbled. Alyson sat in a chair, a cup of hot tea clutched between her hands. She’d been up for hours, having given up on sleep sometime around three in the morning. Now, she sat in the dark quiet of Liv’s living room, her thoughts filled only with the steady tick tick of a nearby clock.

  It’d been almost a week since Jami left her standing in the middle of Knockout feeling like her heart had been ripped from her chest. Since then, she and Olivia had made somewhat of a habit of staying up too late. It led to profound exhaustion, but still, she couldn’t sleep, wondering how the meeting with Marco Maretti had gone.

  The phone remained silent.

  Alyson and Olivia had agreed on one thing—they refused to be the ones to break the unofficial standoff.

  Olivia assured Alyson that Jami wouldn’t stay away long and that he probably just needed some space to clear his head. Then he would be begging on his knees for her to forgive him.

  Alyson wasn’t too sure of that, though she couldn’t deny that she hoped.

  Each minute of each day that passed by without hearing from him left a bigger hole in her chest. Often, she found herself wondering how Jami was doing, if everything had gone okay, if they were still among the living. She hadn’t seen anything on the news or in the paper, and something in her heart told her they were fine. She would know if anything bad had happened, right? She had to go with her gut. It was the only thing keeping her from losing her mind, breaking down, and calling.

  Exhausted as she was, she was thankful when, sometime during the night, her brain finally shut down enough to expel thoughts. If she couldn’t sleep, at least she was no longer torturing herself thinking. Maybe it was in survival mode, she didn’t know, but at least, the constant presence of anxiety ridden butterflies swooping through her stomach had finally abated.

  “Can’t sleep either?”

  The sound of Liv’s groggy voice made Alyson jump. Hot liquid leapt from the mug, spilling onto her oversized Hello Kitty nightshirt. Setting the cup on the table, she stood and brushed her hand down her front. “Not a wink. You?”

  Following her into the kitchen, Alyson leaned against the doorframe and watched Liv move around the room as she filled the coffee pot with water and measured coffee into the filter. “Maybe an hour,” Liv replied, once the coffee maker began chugging and belching away.

  Crazy blonde hair stuck out all over Liv’s head, and black mascara was smeared beneath both eyes, attesting to her lack of sleep. She must have done her fair share of tossing and turning, too. “This love thing is for the birds.”

  Alyson agreed with a slight tilt of her head. Pursing her lips, she asked, “Do you have to work today?”

  Pouring herself a cup of coffee, Olivia took a moment to doctor it up with three heaping scoops of sugar and a dash of creamer. She sipped the hot brew, sighing as it hit her empty stomach. “Oh, yeah, that’s what I was missing.” Her eyes opened, looking more alert. “I have first and second shift today. Audrey needed me to take her shift so she could attend her kid’s play. He’s a fungus or something.”

  Alyson smiled.

  “Why do you ask?”

  Scuffing her bare toes against the cold linoleum, Alyson shrugged. She’d been giving it some thought and she needed something to keep her occupied so she wouldn’t continue to sit around torturing herself with possibilities. “I have nothing to do, and I’m tired of sitting around here all day like a lump. I was wondering if maybe there might be an opening or something.”

  “Like a job?” Liv inquired. Alyson looked up at her, hopeful. “I’m not sure. I’d have to ask. You’d really want to come to work with me?” She seemed excited, and her whole demeanor perked up.

  “I need work, and it’s not like anyone else is going to hire me.” Not after being fired. One look into her record, one talk with Mallory, and they would laugh her right out of the building. Until she regrouped and came up with a better plan, this was it. “Plus, I don’t think I could spend another second sitting around here. I need to do something with myself, or I’m going to tear my hair out.”

  “You could put those hidden cleaning skills to the test again,” she suggested wryly. Olivia’s blue eyes assessed her from the tips of her toes to the top of her head. Finally, she said, “All right, get cleaned up, and I’ll put a call in to Jeremy. With any luck, he can find something for you to do.”

  Alyson’s eyes blurred. Taking the two steps that separated them, she threw her arms around Liv’s shoulders. “Thank you.”

  “What for? I haven’t gotten you the job yet.”

  Smiling into her hair, Alyson said, “For always being such a good friend to me. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

  Olivia patted her back and then pushed her away with a soft chuckle. “Yeah, yeah. That’s what friends are for. Now go get dressed!”

  Alyson gave her a little squeeze, and then raced off to the bathroom to shower. A half an hour later, she found Olivia in the kitchen where she’d left her, packing sandwiches into two brown bags. “Jeremy is the worst when it comes to feeding us slaves, so I always bring my own lunch. Hope you like bologna and cheese.”

  Tears threatened to ruin her makeup. “I got the job?”

  Liv’s smile was bright. “Yep. Apparently, Jeremy has been looking for another girl to work the floor. When I said I had friend who needed a job, he hired you on the spot, sight unseen.”

  “Wow, he must be desperate.”

  “Jeremy is always desperate.” She smirked, and then paused, one hand pushed deep into the bottom of a bag. “Shit, you know how to serve, right?”

  “You mean do I know how to carry glasses to a table? I might be a little rusty, but sure.” Alyson lifted her shoulder casually. In her early days, before she had her degree, she’d waited a few tables. It wasn’t her dream job by any means, and the work was hard—really freaking hard—but she was willing to do anything to keep busy. Plus, she could really use the paycheck.

  “Without breaking anything?” A pale blonde brow rose.

  “I make no promises,” Alyson joked.

  “Shit, this is going to backfire on me, isn’t it?” Finished making their lunches, Olivia announced that she was going to get ready, and then disappeared into the bathroom. An hour later, they were walking into Hot Tamale together.

  TWENTY-TWO

  Jeremy was kind of a dick. He looked Alyson over. Deep chocolate brown eyes that reminded her of Jami took their time as they catalogued her every curve. Under such close scrutiny, Alyson was certain no flaw would be passed over. Reclining in a comfortable looking leather chair, Jeremy looked up at her. “I’m only hiring you because Olivia vouched for you and because I’m out of options. Because I don’t know anything about you, I’m hiring you on a trial basis. Try to limit the number of glasses you break. If you survive tonight, and decide you actually want to come back, then we’ll talk about adding you to the schedule.”

  Standing in front of his desk—because she hadn’t been offered a seat—Alyson nodded in agreement.

  Pulling open the bottom drawer of his desk, Jeremy yanked out a couple of papers and handed them to her. “Sit down and fill those out. When you’re done, we’ll get you on the floor and see what you can do.” Alyson’s eyes lifted from the application she was holding, catching Jeremy’s flirty wink.

  Yeah, he’d meant that to sound as suggestive as she took it.

  Taking the lone chair she assumed was set out for the clientele, Alyson searched around for something to write on. The only hard surface she found was the desk, and it was buried beneath mounds of paperwork, empty Styrofoam cups, and an untold number of pens, pencils, paperclips, disc
arded staples, and rubber bands.

  She felt right at home.

  Instantly more at ease, Alyson brushed her hand over the corner of the desk, clearing a small space while being careful not to disturb the delicate balance he’d created. Like her, he probably knew exactly where everything was. It was a controlled kind of chaos.

  Selecting a pen from one of the many scattered around, Alyson began writing down her personal information, ignoring the amused smirk she caught Jeremy wearing from her peripherals.

  Once the paperwork was safely filed away, Alyson changed into the black nylon uniform and was led back into the club where she was handed off to the bartender, Andrea, who’d been tasked with showing her the ropes. At first, she’d been a ball of nerves. The club was loud and crowded, much more alive than any place she had ever worked in, and the women there were astonishingly beautiful. Instantly, she realized that Jeremy was the kind of guy who appreciated beauty, and he’d hit the mother lode with this group.

  Alyson was overwhelmed with the amount of cleavage on display and completely out of her element. There was no way she could compete. Yet, it didn’t take long for her to realize that these women weren’t much different from her. Most of them were educated, warm, and welcoming. Like her, they just needed the money.

  Fresh out of college, Andrea was a candy apple red bombshell with a rocking body who seemed smart and driven. By the middle of her shift, Alyson had learned that Andrea had recently finished earning her Masters in Criminal Law and would soon be moving on to bigger and better things. She loved being at the club and would miss it, but she couldn’t wait to scrub the streets clean.

  She was also a master at mixing drinks.

  So many times, Alyson considered taking a sip—just a small one—to sample the delicious concoctions. They smelled as amazing as they looked, especially the ones with slices of fruit in them.

  “How’re we doing?” Jeremy asked, sliding onto a stool beside Alyson where she stood at the bar waiting for her next order.

  She glanced over and smiled dutifully. “Great, I haven’t broken a single glass all night.”

  Jeremy’s eyes twinkled, and a smile inched up on his face. “Wow, I’m impressed. The first time Andrea worked the floor, she plowed through half my stock before the middle of her shift.” He grinned at Andrea when she appeared in front of them, loading Alyson’s tray with a couple of icy beers and an enormous cup filled to the brim with blue liquid. So this is what a brain melter is, she mused, licking her lips.

  “That’s why we keep her behind the counter now,” Jeremy was saying, calling Alyson back from her thoughts.

  “No, you keep me back here because I make the best drinks, and the customers love me,” Andrea retorted.

  “And because, if I let you roam free, someone might snap you up. I’m all about protecting the ladies,” Jeremy told Alyson. “I take stranger danger very seriously.”

  Alyson smirked and nodded as she gathered her tray. “That’s very noble of you.”

  “Damn right it is,” Jeremy said, accepting a beer from Andrea. Twisting off the cap, he tossed it over the bar. “Hey, you’re off at ten, right?”

  Alyson stopped in her tracks and pursed her lips. “Ah, I think so?” They hadn’t been too firm on the instructions, but as long as Liv was still making her rounds, Alyson figured she was still on the clock.

  “You are,” Jeremy told her firmly. He tapped the watch sitting on his left wrist. “It’s almost eleven. Finish your tables and clock out.”

  Alyson delivered the drinks and did just that. On her way back from the bathroom, where she’d taken a moment to herself to freshen up, she passed Olivia. “Hey,” she said, stopping her with a hand on her arm.

  “Hey, you. How was your first night?” Olivia looked bright and cheerful. Not at all like she’d just worked a twelve hour shift. Alyson, on the other hand, couldn’t feel her feet, and her back was aching beyond anything she’d ever felt before. Pain relievers were definitely in her future.

  “Good,” Alyson said happily. “I didn’t break anything, and I made a hundred bucks in tips.”

  “I’d say that’s very good,” Olivia laughed. “So, do you think you’ll be staying on?”

  “For a while, yeah,” Alyson said with a nod. It wasn’t a desk job and helping get people drunk was the extent of her good deed for the day, but she didn’t mind the work and the pay was good. It beat twiddling her thumbs and staring into space.

  “Good, I’m glad. Hey, I have a couple more tables to finish up and a tab to close out, then I’ll be ready. Wait for me?”

  “Yep, no problem.” Besides, where else would she be? Liv was her ride, and the wait would give her time to test out one of Andrea’s delicious drinks.

  An hour later, Olivia was dragging Alyson through the front door of her condo, cursing up a storm. “How much did you drink? Jesus, how much do you weigh?” She huffed, dropping Alyson face first onto the couch. “Close the door for me.”

  Alyson grumbled, “I can’t. My legs don’t work anymore.”

  “I’m not talking to you, boozer.” Her voice grew fainter as she moved away. “Thanks for rescuing me. I’m sorry for making you come out so late, but I didn’t know who else to call. I swear I turned my back on her for a minute. The next thing I know, she’s practically falling out of her chair.”

  Someone answered, the voice low and full of bass, but the hushed words were impossible to make out. Not that Alyson cared. For the first time in days, she was deliriously happy. The weight of worry and sadness she’d been carrying around like an anvil had evaporated into nothingness. And she didn’t care what Liv said, she felt light as a feather. She erupted into giggles, thinking of feathers and birds and being a bird. “Birds of a feather flock together,” she sang, hair catching in her mouth as she spoke. She spit it back out.

  “What in the world are you talking about?” Olivia sounded annoyed... and loud. Very loud. “Could you keep still for a freaking minute?” Alyson wiggled her foot, laughing hysterically as Olivia chased it through the air trying to remove her shoes. “Help me out here?” Olivia asked in exasperation.

  A familiar voice that resonated deep in her soul stopped Alyson’s happy time short. Stilling, she frowned. “I should probably take off. I doubt she’d be too thrilled to know I’m here right now.”

  “What are you talking about? Of course, she knows you’re here. You’re the one who helped me get her pain in the ass into the car.”

  “Jami?” Eyes instantly tearing up, Alyson flipped over… and crashed straight to the floor. Holding her head, her face scrunched up, she moaned. “Ow.”

  “Shit, Ally. Are you okay?”

  Alyson peeled open her scratchy eyes to find the most handsome face she’d ever seen peering back at her. Jami, the love of her life, her future husband, and father to their ten children stroked her hair away from her face. “You came back to me,” she whispered in awe. The light cast from a nearby table lamp created a glowing halo around him, so bright it hurt her eyes, but she couldn’t bring herself to look away.

  He was like an angel that heaven sent to protect her. She reached for him, her hand skimming his scruffy cheek. “So pretty,” she cooed, because apparently drinking made her a total sap. But Jami didn’t seem to mind, if his crooked smile was any indication.

  “Come on. Up you go.” Fitting his big hands beneath her arms, Jami pulled her to her unsteady feet and eased her back onto the couch. Kneeling, he kissed her forehead. “Liv called me. You’re quite the happy drunk, you know that?” Even wearing a smile, Jami appeared pensive.

  “No, I don’t know that,” she slurred, suddenly not feeling very happy anymore. Someone had sucked all the fun out of the room. “Liv said you would come, but I didn’t believe her.”

  Jami’s brows pinched together. “How come?” he asked as he began petting her hair.

  She remembered getting lost in those dark eyes. The tender way he would touch her, kiss her. The soothing sound of his voice in her
ear. God, she missed him so much. Tears burned the back of her eyes as it dawned on her that she and Jami were over. He shouldn’t be here taking care of her, talking to her, because he didn’t want her anymore. And could she really blame him? She’d lied to him and broken his trust. The truth of it struck her like a fist to the chest. “Because you don’t love me anymore,” she sniffed.

  His eyes narrowed, so dark and unhappy. “Who told you that?”

  Looking at him was too painful to bear. She had to get away, but she had nowhere to go, and she didn’t trust her feet to carry her. Turning her back to him, Alyson buried her face in the couch cushions. “You did,” she said miserably.

  “I never said that. Hey.” Jami forced her to turn back around. Grasping her chin, he tilted her face to his. “I would never say that,” he said fiercely, his brown eyes burning. “I love you, Ally. That’s never gonna change, you hear me? But if you ever climb up on that pole again, I’ll turn you over my knee and spank that delicious ass.”

  Alyson felt her face twist in confusion. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “No?” Jami’s brows rose up. “Well, I sure as hell do. Christ, I don’t think I’ll ever get that image out of my head. Hell, neither will anyone else,” he grumbled, his jaw clenched tight. Running a hand down his face, he shook his head as if to dispel his thoughts. Giving her an apologetic look that she didn’t quite understand, he brushed another kiss to her forehead and stood. “You’re drunk. You sleep. I’m gonna take off, but when you’re sobered up, we’re going to talk about what happened tonight.”

  Hope filled her at his words and Alyson attempted to sit up. The room spun, causing her stomach to pitch precariously, and she laid right back down. “What about last week?” she mumbled around the arm now draped over her face. She probably should have sipped the brain eater instead of gulping it.

  “We’ll talk about that, too,” Jami assured her. The front door opened, and she heard him giving Olivia instructions, and then, he was gone.