by Natalie Ann
She laughed at him. “Nick, I’m still Mallory Denning. And I’ve got all the ID to prove it.”
He sat up in bed fast. “What? How is that possible? How is it possible that Paul never found you if you have a driver’s license?”
“That is why I said I don’t think he tried. I’d let my Virginia license lapse, but when I went to buy my house, I had to have ID for all the legal paperwork. So I went and applied for a New York license. I feared someone would find me after I did that, but no one did. I realized that no one was looking. Enough time must have passed.”
“I should have continued to look.”
“What do you mean by ‘continued to look’?”
Nick wished he’d never said that when her jaw dropped. “I hired someone to look for you about eight years ago or so. I’d just gotten out of college and I wanted to know. But there was nothing. No trace of you, and now I know why. There was nothing to find. If I hadn’t given up, then I would have found out earlier.”
“It was better that you stopped looking. Though we both know you never really gave up, right?” she asked, snuggling into his chest again.
“Never.” He leaned down and kissed her forehead. “I really do love you. I know it might have felt forced with my grandmother putting us on the spot, but I’ve known for a long time that I loved you. That I never really stopped loving you. I can prove it to you, too.”
“How’s that?” she asked, amused. “Just so you know, I’ve always loved you too. Though I can say my love for you back then is nothing like it is now. I’m glad we’ve found each other again. I’m sure I’ll be glad when I don’t have to hide anymore, but right now I can’t seem to reconcile any of that.”
He leaned over to the bedside table and grabbed his wallet, opened it, and pulled out a photo—one that had been in there long before she disappeared. One that he’d taken out and looked at again and again—more times than he could count.
“What’s that?” she asked, reaching for the worn photo.
“You.” He handed it to her and watched as she stared at it, her eyes large as saucers. “My proof I never stopped loving you. I never stopped looking.”
“When was this taken? Who took it?”
“My mother took it. I didn’t know at the time and didn’t tell you. She was teasing me about how I was always going over to your backyard and talking to you. She snapped that picture through the trees of us on the bench one day without our knowledge. Said it was too cute to not capture.”
“All you see is my face, just the back of you.”
“I think she meant to get the picture of you. Said that was the happiest she’d seen you in a while. More relaxed than she remembered. I wanted to remember that about you, so this picture has always been with me.”
“I don’t know what to say to that.”
“Let’s just take it one step at a time then. Let’s just make it about us tonight.”
He pulled her closer, draping her across his chest and running his hand up and down her back. Her skin was so soft and smooth, just like satin. He never wanted to stop touching her, to stop feeling her against him.
“Make me forget, Nick. Make me forget about what happened today,” she said quietly. He heard every bit of emotion in her voice as she whispered those words.
“We can’t completely forget the past, Mallory. No one can. It’s shaped us into who we are today, but I can make you think of something else right now. Think of me, and think of what I do to you. What I’m going to do to you.”
He rolled her over quick, changing their positions, with him now looking down on her, his body half covering her. Then he kissed the corner of her mouth, ran his tongue lightly around each and every groove until she opened for him, swooping in and slowly showing her how much he felt for her.
It had to be slow tonight. He had to draw it out and do what he promised to do. To make her think of something else. Think only of him.
His fingertips skimmed her shoulder, then down her arm and up her waist to her breast, cupping her, feeling her. Never stopping the possession he felt for her. The urge to protect and shield mixed right in with something more primitive.
Her nipple hardened when his thumb brushed over it, so he did it again and again, dueling with her tongue, bringing her as much pleasure as possible.
Moving his lips, he started to place dainty kisses on her cheek, inching closer to her ear, where he whispered, “I’ve never made love with anyone before. Not with the way I feel for you. I’ve never felt for anyone the way you make me feel. You bring so much out of me and I want to show you tonight. Let me show you.”
“Yes,” she said, expelling a little breath. “Show me. And know I feel the same way.”
Her little confession just fueled him more than he thought possible. There seemed to be a humming in his ears and a roaring in his chest. A beast that wanted to come out and claim her. Take her away from all that was evil, and extinguish her fears.
Threading their fingers together, he lifted them over her head and held onto her while he started to kiss her some more. He could stay at her mouth for hours on end. Taste her and bring every little pleasure out that he could.
But when she started to lift her hips against his, rub her body into his and purr deep in her throat, he knew he didn’t have the hours he’d hoped for. Later maybe, but right now he needed to move on.
Unlacing their fingers, he moved down her chest, stopping at her breasts, paying homage to them like never before. Kissing them for as long as he could, even biting them when she started to get more restless. “Let’s take our time tonight. I want to make it last.”
“Make it last by doing it again, not prolonging this. Make me forget. I just want to forget about my life. I only want thoughts of you.”
She was slowly killing him, and she didn’t even have a clue. Or maybe she did, only he was too wired to think about it.
Instead he moved his tongue between her breasts, teased her some more—just because he could—then moved lower. Each rib, each groove of her toned body got the same treatment as her mouth and then her breasts did, until she yanked on his hair playfully. “Move up or down, but just move somewhere.”
So he continued on his path downward targeting the essence of her he was craving. There was no way he was rushing this, not when he was where he always wanted to be. Tasting the core of her, bringing her to a point where she would shout his name. A point where she was focused only on him.
He loved hearing his name being ripped from her lips and tonight was all about making her do it again and again. To forget a few hours of today.
His mouth, his hands, his fingers, even his teeth, all went to work on her. Bringing her up, holding her at the peak, dragging it out and then making her wait. Making her beg.
“Please, Nick. Don’t keep doing that. Just end it, please.”
There would never be an end in his mind. Ever. He found her, he was keeping her and she would never be without him. “It can’t fully end with us. You know that.”
“I know, but now, just help me now.”
He couldn’t keep it up any longer. She needed him, she wanted him and he had to give her everything he had, so he did. Tasting and sucking, his fingers moving in and out, until at once she was lifting her hips high against him, shouting out his name with more emotion than he’d ever heard before.
When he thought she was rung dry, nothing else left to give him, he moved up her body, kissed her again, let her taste herself on his lips and kept it up until her hips were rising to his. Then he stopped and grabbed a condom and moved back over her.
Threading their fingers together one last time, he slowly entered her, his eyes right on her face, watching every emotion, every movement she made.
“Don’t close your eyes, Mallory. I want to look into those blue pools of light.”
“I can’t keep them open.”
“Yes, you can. You can do anything you put your mind to. You’re the strongest woman I know, and the world is your
s for the taking. I’m yours for the taking.”
He was panting heavily as he said those words, the meaning hitting him like a ton of bricks. She started to meet him movement for movement, thrust for thrust, faster and faster. The two of them racing the other. Who was going to win? It didn’t matter. There was no loser here. Only winners. Only the two of them together.
He collapsed on her moments later, gasping for air and holding her tight. He didn’t want to let go of her; he didn’t want to move away from her body, but he had to.
Throwing the covers back, he got out of the bed and looked down at her. Her face was flushed, her eyes were wet with tears, but not sad tears, he knew, and she was smiling.
“You made me forget,” she murmured.
He ran his hand over her head, then leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. “I aim to please.”
“Oh, you please all right.”
He chuckled, then turned and walked out of the room. When he came back she was passed out cold. He climbed in next to her and lay his head on her chest, letting the slow and steady beat of her heart lull him to sleep.
Homecoming
“Let’s turn around. It’s not too late.”
“Nope, it’s not too late,” Nick agreed. “But I’m not turning around.”
Trying to get three airline tickets on such short noticed proved more difficult than Nick had realized. Of course he should have known better, as there were a limited number of flights in and out of the area.
Before Mallory could change her mind about returning to Richmond, he’d suggested everyone pack a bag this morning, and they did. Whether Mallory was agreeable due to the good night’s sleep they’d had, he didn’t know, but he wasn’t risking her changing her mind.
That it took her four hours into their eleven-hour drive to suggest they turn around did surprise him though. He’d actually expected it long before now.
“Please,” she whispered, then looked behind her to see his grandmother napping in the back.
“Mallory, let’s just do this. We’ll be there by eight. Both of my parents should be home by then and we’ll go straight to their house.”
He’d woken up early this morning, the endorphins from the night before still rushing through him. Rather than wake Mallory, he started to hunt up flight schedules. When he realized it’d be days if not a week or more to get three tickets, he called his grandmother and talked to her before suggesting anything to Mallory.
Of course his grandmother was on board and said she’d be packed in thirty minutes. She didn’t seem too concerned in regards to Mallory agreeing.
“I don’t think I can do this, Nick,” Mallory said and his heart filled with sympathy. This was hard on her, he knew, but it wasn’t easy on him either. He was going to be relieved to have her presence out in the open again. If not for her, then for them as a couple.
“You can. You know you can and you’ll be thankful when it’s over.”
“I doubt that.”
“Relax. There’s still seven hours to go. Don’t stress the entire time. You’re just going to work yourself up. We’ll go straight to my parents’ house. No one is going to even know we’re there. My parents are going to be thrilled to see you.”
“Do you think so? I don’t think they will. What if they’re mad?”
He sighed. “They aren’t going to be mad at you, Mallory. They’re going to be confused and they’re going to have questions. Questions you don’t have to answer completely if you don’t want to. And they’re going to be thrilled that you’re alive and well.”
“I hope so.”
“I know so.”
***
“So is this how you imagined your homecoming?” Trixie asked when they stopped to get a late lunch.
“I wouldn’t say this is a homecoming. I never thought I’d be coming home at all,” Mallory said, picking at the chips on her plate next to her barely touched sandwich.
Her stomach was too tied up in knots to even consider putting food in it. But Nick had wanted to get out of the car at the halfway mark and stretch his legs and let his grandmother move around too. She could never say no to Trixie’s comfort.
“Sweetie, I always knew you’d go home.”
“Why’s that?” Mallory asked.
She honestly never thought she would. Least of all after her mother’s funeral.
It’d taken everything she had to disguise herself and return for that. She’d thought for sure someone would have noticed her, but they didn’t and she felt she could relax again after that visit.
Seeing Nick back then had hurt. Hurt in a way full of regret. She couldn’t regret leaving, she’d had no choice, she knew that. But she did regret that she never said goodbye to him.
It didn’t matter that he’d broken her heart right before she’d left. She still wished she’d said goodbye to him, rather than let him always wonder if she was alive.
Then there was Rene. Her best friend back then. If leaving without saying a word to Nick was hard, walking away from Rene was even harder. I had no choice though. That’s what she reminded herself for years.
“You know you can never put it behind you completely. You can never fully move on until you make peace with what happened years ago. You’ve been stuck for twelve years in one place.”
“Stuck?” Mallory said, sputtering. “I haven’t been stuck. I’ve made something of myself. I’ve got a good life. I can support myself.”
How dare Trixie say she was stuck? She wasn’t the scared eighteen-year-old girl who snuck out in the middle of the night twelve years ago. Of all the people in the world, Trixie knew that the best.
“Getting your backbone again?” Trixie asked, raising her eyebrows.
“You’re trying to get me riled up?”
“It’s one of her old tricks,” Nick said. “I’m surprised you fell for it.”
“So am I,” Mallory muttered, then picked up her sandwich and took an angry bite.
Trixie laughed. “It’s going to be just fine, Mallory.”
The sandwich seemed to get lodged in Mallory’s throat. “You know why I’m having anxiety.”
“I do. But it’s unwarranted right now. You know that, so relax.”
“What am I missing? What aren’t you telling me?” Nick asked Trixie.
“Nothing, Nick,” Mallory said quickly.
“Bull. There’s more about why you left than you’ve told me. I don’t understand why you can’t tell me everything. Why is it such a big secret?”
“It’s not important right now,” Mallory said and took another bite, fighting to swallow the sandwich and stop any more questions, but she should have known it wouldn’t discourage Nick.
“It is important. Whatever happened changed your life. It changed my life.”
She wanted to snap back that it wasn’t about him. She didn’t leave to punish him. She didn’t leave to punish anyone. She’d left to survive.
Only in order to say that, she’d have to confess more than she felt comfortable saying, least of all in a tiny diner on the roadside. “I thought we agreed to start fresh.”
“We did. We are. But sometimes you have to take care of the past in order to accept the future.”
“I’m trying to do that. I’m going home, aren’t I? I’m doing the one thing I never thought I’d do again.”
“But you went home once already. You went home for your mother’s funeral,” Nick said. “How is this any different?”
“Because no one knew I was there. I went and left with no one the wiser. This time, I’m showing up and announcing myself. I’m putting myself out there for everyone to see. For everyone to question what happened, why I left and what my motive was. How I managed to leave. You name it, it’ll all be asked of me.”
Trixie reached her hand over and laid it on Mallory’s. “You don’t have to answer anything you don’t want to. And I’m not sure there will be as many questions as you think.”
“I doubt that,” Nick mumbled.
> There went the comfort that Trixie was offering her. “Thanks, Nick. Just what I needed to hear. Couldn’t you at least pretend to agree with Trixie?”
“Listen, Mallory. I’m here for you. I said I would be and I am. But the reality of it is, people are going to want to know. Who cares about the strangers on the street? Who cares about the media or anything, if there even is any? But my parents and sister deserve some type of answer.”
“I know. And that is what’s making this hard.” Mallory pushed her unfinished plate forward and picked up her water, trying to cool her burning throat. “I never meant to hurt anyone. I wish I never hurt you. I’m trying to make it up to you, and I’ll do the same for them. I love you. I don’t want to cause problems for you, or us, if they’re upset with me.”
“So that’s what this is about?” Nick said. “You think they might try to talk me out of my feelings for you? Or something like that?”
“It had crossed my mind. I know how close you are to your family. I know how much they’ve always supported you. There is a part of me that is terrified they’re going to remind you that you just got out of a bad relationship. And here you are taking on someone new. Someone with a cruise ship full of baggage.”
“I’ve never shied away from anything in my life before and I’m not about to now. My parents know that about me. Besides, they’d never try to tell me to not follow my heart. I’m following my heart with you. All I ask is you do the same.”
The Plan
They’d made good time and a little after eight were pulling into the driveway of Nick’s parents’ home. Mallory briefly glanced over and took note of the lights on in her old home, but then turned back to see Nick’s eyes on her. “Are you going to be okay?”
“It’s a little late to ask me that now, don’t you think?”
He grinned at her, a soft look coming into his eyes, and then he reached over and clasped her hand in his. “Doesn’t mean I don’t worry.”
“She’ll be fine, Nick,” Trixie said from the backseat. “I need to stretch these old legs of mine. Let’s go give my daughter a surprise.”