Laces and Lace (Assassins #6)

by Toni Aleo

  Her lip quivered as she slowly nodded. “I have a bra on that looks and feels like real breasts, but they aren’t.”

  Lacey could see the confusion on his face, but she could also see the pure love in his eyes. Slowly, she reached for the bottom of her shirt and pulled it up and over her head, exposing herself in a way that no one had ever seen. Not even Rachel had seen her without clothing. She knew about the double mastectomy, so did her dad and Grady, but no one had ever seen it except for the doctors and nurses. Not looking in his eyes, she slowly undid the back of her bra and let it fall down her arms, allowing him to see her as tears welled up in her eyes. Looking down at her own chest, she hated the cancer that had taken away her breasts. They looked deflated, only skin from where she had been a full B cup shriveled up against her chest, with large, long pink scars going down the middle. She didn’t have nipples, just skin, and she knew it was disgusting, but she hoped that Karson would still love her.

  Biting the inside of her cheek, she knew she couldn’t prolong it anymore, so she looked up to find Karson taking in every detail of her. When his eyes met hers, a single tear rolled down her cheek as she whispered, “I know I should have told you before this moment, but I was just so scared that you would reject me. I know they are disgusting—”

  “You’re beautiful, Lacey. Nothing about you is disgusting. I love you, all of you. When I look at your chest, all I see is survival. I see a second chance at a life, a life with me. So please don’t apologize for something you couldn’t control. Just allow me to make love to you, and please don’t ever forget how much I love you and how I think you are the most gorgeous girl in the world.”

  Relief and love exploded in Lacey’s chest as she looked deep into his eyes. Her lip started to wobble before a sob escaped her lips, but then Karson was there, kissing the sobs away. She would never love a man like she did Karson, and she was fine with that. He was her forever. Laying her back, he kissed down her neck and held himself up as he looked down at her. Kissing her nose and then a few of the stray tears, he kissed her lips. Trailing his kisses down his jaw and neck, he placed one in the middle of her chest. Slowly, he placed his lips on her left scar, kissing it softly before doing the same to the right. Tears rolled down the side of her face as she watched him, and when his eyes met hers, he smiled before saying, “I love you, Lacey. All of you.”

  Not able to say anything else, she whispered, “I love you.”

  Karson was stunned by what Lacey had just shared with him, but he was thankful that she completely trusted him. He loved her with everything inside of him and had waited for this moment for months. He had wanted her since the moment he met her, but unlike with other girls, he wanted to savor her, wanted to treasure her, and wanted to wait until the moment she was ready. She had been nervous since the beginning when it came to him, and he wanted to show her that he could love her without sleeping with her. The last two months had been the best of his life. He was playing the best hockey of his life, and he was in love with the girl of his dreams.

  Being with Lacey was easy, like breathing, and she lit up his day every time he saw her. He craved her and couldn’t help but fall in love with her over and over again each day. She was that amazing, that perfect. She worked so hard, she loved with all her heart, and he admired everything she had been through. She was the strongest person he knew, and he loved her with everything inside of him. He couldn’t wait to take her to meet his parents the following day, and Kacey already loved her. He had huge plans for them and couldn’t wait for their future, but right now, he had to make love to the love of his life.

  Kissing down her stomach, he unbuttoned her jeans, slowly sliding them down her legs to reveal a little lace thong. Groaning inwardly, he threw her jeans over his shoulder and kissed up her thighs as her hand snaked up into his hair. Spreading her legs, he pressed himself into her before meeting his mouth with hers. The heat from her sweet center teased his dick through his athletic shorts, and he wanted nothing more than to bury himself deep inside her, but he wanted to draw this out as much as he could. He wanted to enjoy her thoroughly.

  Falling to the side of her, he continued to kiss her as his hand made a trail down her stomach to between her legs. Pulling her panties to the side, he dipped his fingers between her wet folds and groaned against her lips as his fingers sank into her center. She was hot and wet, driving him completely mad with lust. As he lazily moved his fingers along the taut bud between her folds, he kissed her with urgency as she gasped and thrashed under his hand. He loved feeling her like this, making her come. He’d always wondered why she never took her shirt off when they would fool around before, but now that he knew why, he only loved her more. She was so strong, so beautiful, and all his.

  Moving his finger in just the right way against her silky nub, he watched as she came undone under his hand. She bit into his lip, her body shaking under his touch as he removed his hand, slowly pushing her panties down. Kissing along her neck and jaw, he brought her lips to his, kissing her with all the love he had in his soul for her. Knowing he couldn’t wait any longer, Karson crawled over her, reaching into his drawer and pulling out a condom. Chucking his shorts down, he sheathed himself with the condom before crawling back over her, his hands shaking at the mere thought that they were only seconds away from connecting in the most passionate way. Pushing her legs apart, he fell between them, dropping his lips to hers.

  As he kissed her, his heart swelled in his chest. He wanted to whisper every single plan he had for them. How he wanted to get married the moment she graduated. That he hoped that by then he was making the kind of money that could support her business. After a year or two, when the business was making great money, he wanted to get her pregnant at least twice. With the hopes that at least one of their sweet babies would be a little girl like her, someone who could have him wrapped around her finger the way her momma had done. He wanted to make a home with her, grow old in that home, and just love her for the rest of his life. She was it—a done deal.

  Pulling back to look into her sweet eyes, he smiled as he whispered, “I love you, Lacey Martin.”

  Without giving her time to say the words he loved hearing her say, he pushed inside her slowly, a groan escaping his lips from how utterly good she felt. She was tight, sexy, and fuck, he wasn’t going to last long. Her body squeezed him like a vise, and his eyes fell shut as he slowly moved in and out of her. Gripping her sides with his hands, he picked up speed, his body aching for release as she clutched him to her. It didn’t take long, and soon he thrust with one last grunt, spilling into the condom as she squeezed him tight with her body. Falling onto her chest, he kissed her long and hard, his heart pounding with hers as they both gasped for breath. He hated that he didn’t last, but she was too hot and too sexy for him to last any longer than he had. He also hadn’t had sex in months, so being enveloped in her slick heat didn’t help his staying power.

  “I promise, next time, I’ll knock your socks off,” he whispered against her neck.

  She giggled as she lazily ran her fingers up his back. “You did knock my socks off—what are you talking about?”

  “That was short,” he said shyly, causing her body to shake with laughter.

  “I got off and you got off; I’m good. You are delicious in every way, Karson. I am completely satisfied.”

  Smiling at her, he leaned over, pressing his lips to the side of her mouth. “Still, next time, I’m going to make you come over and over again.”

  She grinned cheekily. “I can’t wait.”

  Wrapping his arms around her, he held her close as he kissed her temple, basking in the feel of her nakedness against him. She was so beautiful, and to him, nothing was wrong with her. As much as he wanted to look at her naked and enjoy her, he knew they needed to get dressed.

  “We should probably get dressed before Grady comes back.”

  “Just little longer,” she whispered against his jaw as she cuddled closer.

  “Okay,” he agreed a
s their legs tangled up with each other. The room was completely silent except for the clock on the wall ticking and the guys downstairs. Karson knew that the locked door wouldn’t keep Grady out, but he couldn’t bring himself to get up to get dressed. This was the girl he was going to spend the rest of his life with. Grady might need to get used to seeing them together, naked and otherwise.

  “Karson,” Lacey whispered. He looked down to see her staring at him, her pale green eyes locking her gaze with his as she worked her bottom lip with her teeth.

  “Yeah?”

  “If you asked me to go with you when you leave, I’d go without hesitation.”

  He never expected that, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t beyond happy to hear her say it. “Really?”

  She nodded. “I don’t want to be apart from you, and I can go to school wherever you get picked up. I’ll take out loans and get a job. It will work as long as we have each other, right?”

  “Yeah, it will.”

  With a grin, she said, “Good, ’cause I think so, too.”

  As she cuddled into him, Karson wrapped his arms a little tighter around her, placing sweet kisses against her chest and then her neck before looking up into her eyes. “Hey, Lacey?”

  “Yeah?” she whispered against his lips.

  “Will you go with me wherever I go?”

  He knew the answer, but hearing her say it made it ten times sweeter. Looking down into his sparkling eyes, she smiled as she answered, “Yes.”

  Coming off the ice, Karson headed toward his locker, lowering himself onto the bench as he gasped for breath. It was a tough practice but a needed one. They had their first play-off game the following day, and Karson was ready to win. This was his last season as a Cat, and he planned to go out with a bang. It had been decided that morning. He was going into the draft, and he was beyond excited. Especially now that his girl would come with him, wherever he went.

  Removing his jersey and then his shirt, he bent over to undo his skates as everyone filed in, doing the same. He wanted to hit the showers before heading home for a nap. He was meeting Lacey that night for dinner with his parents, and while he was excited for his mom and dad to meet her, he couldn’t wait to tell her that he was going to go into the draft. She would be excited for him, proud even, and that put a little pep in his step as he slid his skates off before hanging them in his locker. Removing his girdle and then shorts, he wrapped a towel around his waist and proceeded to the showers.

  “King.”

  He looked over his shoulder to see Coach standing in the doorway. “Yeah, Coach?”

  “When you’re done, come to my office.”

  Karson nodded. “Sure.”

  Not knowing what that was about since they’d had a meeting that morning with his dad, Karson hurried in the shower before getting dressed and heading to his office. After he knocked, Coach looked up and said, “Shut the door and come in.”

  Karson did as he was asked before falling into the seat in front of his desk. “What’s up, Coach?”

  Coach sat there for a moment, moving his fingers along the desk, and then finally looked up. “You’re not going to like what I’m about to say, but I have to protect my daughter.”

  Karson’s whole body went cold as his coach’s pale green eyes held his. Choosing not to say anything, he waited as Coach gathered his words. He slowly stood, looking at Karson as his hand came to rest on his hips. “You love her?”

  “Yes,” he said, like a promise.

  “Then let her go.”

  “I can’t do that,” he said, sitting up in his seat. “I need her. I love her. I know you want to protect her, but I promise I’ll do just that. I’ll make you proud, Coach.”

  “She wants to go with you wherever you go, and we both know it won’t be Chicago. She can’t leave. She needs to finish her education—for free, I might add—and she needs to be here with her family, not off somewhere where you’re going to leave her when you’re on the road.”

  He had a point, but Karson had every plan to love and protect Lacey. He just had to ease his coach’s doubts. “I understand your concern, Coach, but she will be fine. She plans to go to school and work while I play. When I start making the big bucks, I’ll buy her the business she wants and then she can work from home. We’ve got a plan, one I believe in.”

  “So you want her to go to school and pay an arm and a leg? When she can stay here and go to school for free? How is that fair? How is that protecting her? She has everything here, but that’s not what is worrying me, King. What if the cancer comes back?”

  Karson’s heart sank and dread filled him as he looked away. “Do you have the money to pay all the co-pays, for the surgeries if they’re needed? Do you think the doctors wherever you are can help her the way our doctors can?”

  “We can come back home if that happens. I’ll protect her,” he said, almost pleading, but Coach shook his head, his mouth in a straight line as he held Karson’s gaze.

  “I know that you think this is it, that she is the girl for you, but son, you’re young and haven’t even begun to see what is out there. I need my daughter to stay here. If you let her go and allow her to finish school here, then when she graduates, I’ll give her the money to start her business.”

  As much as he wanted that for Lacey, he didn’t like the terms that were being offered. He wasn’t going to allow himself to be pushed into something he didn’t want. He wanted Lacey, but he also wanted her to live her dreams. “What I don’t understand is why do I have to let her go? Can’t she stay, and I go? That was the original plan.”

  “No, because she won’t. She has her mind made up. She’d follow you to the ends of the earth, and she deserves better than that. She needs security, and being a rookie in the pros is not going to offer her that. Do you know how much chemo is? How much her double mastectomy was? Hundreds of thousands of dollars, something you will not have, but I do. Let her stay here and go to school for free. Let her have the security I can give her. Let her go, King. I know it will hurt, but it’s what’s best for her.”

  Karson’s fingers bit into his thighs as he slowly shook his head. “I’m sorry, but I can’t let her go. I’ll convince her to stay here. It will work out.”

  Slamming his fist against the desk, Coach shook his head as he yelled, “I want you out of her life! She won’t do what’s best for her if you are still there.”

  “Yes, she will. Just let me convince her to stay here.”

  “No! You aren’t good for her, Karson. You have to break it off with her. If you don’t, then I’m sorry, but you can forget about playing tomorrow.”

  “You can’t do that!” Karson yelled, flying out of his seat. “Teams are coming to watch me tomorrow. I have to play!”

  “You’re right. You have to let her go, or not only will you lose your career but you’ll also lose her. What girl will want to stay with a loser? Especially when you have nothing to offer her?”

  Tears stung his eyes as he looked away, gasping for breath. “Why are you doing this?”

  “Because I love her and need to protect her. She is all I have left of her mother, and I can’t let her go.”

  “But I can’t either. I love her.”

  “If you love her, then let her go. She will be better without you.”

  “No,” he said, shaking his head. “We are better together.”

  “You heard me. You have till tomorrow, King. End it, or I’ll end your career.”

  Taking in a deep breath, he tried to process everything that was just said to him. He was being blackmailed, and there was nothing he could do about it. No one would believe him. Nate Martin was the most respected college hockey coach in the league. Everyone loved him. Hell, Karson’s own dad loved him. He had no choice. He had to protect his career, and he had to make sure that Lacey had the life she deserved, even if it killed him to do it. Coach was right. She had free college here, and if her cancer did come back, at least here, she would be taken care of. As much as he wan
ted to live in his little fantasy world of being a pro and having the best girl on his arm, he had to realize that it wasn’t going to happen.

  Looking up at his coach, he said, “I’ll end it.”

  “Good,” he said with a nod, running his hand through his blond hair. “And another thing, King—she can’t ever know about this. I’ll ruin you if she ever finds out. Don’t ever forget about my connections in the pros.”

  Karson slowly nodded his head. “I won’t tell her.”

  “Or Grady. This is between us. Believe me; it’s for the best. I am helping both of you. You’ll see and be thankful when you are a single rookie making the world yours.”

  Standing up, Karson looked at the man he had idolized for the last two years and felt nothing but hatred for him. Clearing his throat, he shook his head as he said, “I won’t have a world because Lacey won’t be by my side.”

  Walking out of the office in a daze, Karson headed back to the dorm, ignoring everyone as he headed to his room. Once there, he fell into bed and closed his eyes tightly. His tears ran along the side of his eyes, and he needed them to get out of him now. When he was face-to-face with Lacey, he couldn’t cry. He couldn’t let her see how he was slowly dying inside because it would give it all away. She could see right through him and would know that he wasn’t being truthful, but he couldn’t see another way out of this. He had to do it, even if he didn’t want to let her go. There was no other option; he had to protect her and himself. He had worked so hard for his career, and he loved her too much to jeopardize her life. Coach was right; he couldn’t support her the way her father could.

  As he lay crying in his bed, he thought about what this was going to do to her, knowing this was going to break her. He was going to be responsible for shattering her, and he had to live with that for the rest of his life.

  But what other choice did he have?

  Lacey was standing in front of her mirror, looking over the sweater dress she had paired with a pair of black boots, hoping that she looked good enough to meet Karson’s parents. She was nervous, but nothing could wipe the grin off her face. She had spent the night wrapped in her boyfriend’s arms. The same boyfriend she was going to leave Chicago for and continue to love for the rest of her life. She was so glad she took the chance two months ago. She had promised to live life to the fullest, and she was doing just that.