Life Pushes You Along: A woman-loving-woman romance novella

by Emma Sterner-Radley

  “Sounds perfect.”

  The taxi ride had been unbearable. They sat together in the backseat after giving Rebecca’s home address as their destination. Zoe had been casting furtive glances at her when the driver wasn’t looking. Glances brimming with promise.

  Rebecca returned the looks and found herself staring at this fascinating and beautiful woman with pitch-black curls almost down to her shoulders, impressively smooth light brown skin, high cheekbones, and a smile which normally looked mischievous but, in this sexually-loaded situation, looked downright wicked.

  It was so hard not to reach out and touch that smooth skin or to kiss those lips that tonight glistened with burgundy lipstick.

  When Rebecca sat forward a little to give the cab driver further directions to her Marylebone flat, she had felt Zoe’s hand caress along her thigh. It stopped just at the edge of her dress and then slowly, so painfully slowly, slid under it to snake further up.

  Rebecca knew that the cab driver couldn’t see what was happening below her waistline but that hand pushing its way under her tight dress still made her feel exposed and painfully aroused at the same time.

  After what felt like an age, they arrived at her flat. Rebecca hurried to pay and then to rush inside and towards the elevator. Zoe followed at a slower pace. She was almost stalking, hips swaying, wicked grin in place.

  She’s the hunter and I feel like the prey. I’m older and more experienced, but I’m certainly not in charge.

  Suddenly, Zoe’s smirk turned into an open-mouthed smile and Rebecca saw that small, crooked tooth that she found so endearing. Affection muddled her lust and she no longer cared who was meant to be in charge. All she wanted was to get her tongue into that beautiful mouth.

  “Come here,” she said in a low purr.

  She pulled Zoe into the lift and pushed the button for Level Six. Then she kissed her. It was nothing like that kiss they had in the meeting room. Nothing like that kiss when Zoe had been on the brink of a nervous breakdown. There was no crisis, no panic, no anxiety. It was a languid, soft, warm joining of two eager mouths. Tongue, lips, and teeth all moulded together and moved around each other as if they had been kissing like this for years.

  Whatever suave collectedness their mouths had, their hands lacked. They both pawed and grabbed at each other as if they were only allowed a few minutes of touching and were making the most of it. Rebecca groaned filthily as her hands cupped Zoe’s breasts under the leather jacket. Zoe instantly replied by arching her back, pushing her breasts deeper into Rebecca’s grip. It was impossible to say who was more willing, they were perfectly in sync when it came to their need.

  Getting the keys to the front door out of her handbag seemed an impossible task with Zoe kissing her neck and gripping her hips from behind, but she managed it in the end. Moaning in the most unladylike way, Rebecca led them into the apartment and towards the bedroom.

  She felt Zoe tugging at her dress and part of her wanted Zoe to just pull, tear, and rip it off her. She couldn’t stand the idea of fabric separating them.

  She clumsily took the dress off while trying to kiss Zoe and finally managed to stand in front of her new lover in only her underwear. Zoe looked her up and down and Rebecca felt her clit twitch and harden, she was getting hopelessly wet and needed Zoe right now.

  She didn’t have to wait, Zoe kneeled before her and yanked her knickers down in one desperate tug. The garment was tight and the pull should have hurt, but she barely felt it. She did feel the cool air hitting her overheated sex and she felt the intense looks from the beautiful woman kneeling in front of her.

  There was so much she wanted to do, undress Zoe, kiss every inch of her, feel Zoe’s hands roam her body and possibly her mouth following cue but it all vanished in a haze of pleasure as she felt Zoe’s mouth where she needed it the most. Warm wetness met warm wetness and Zoe’s clever tongue chased away all thoughts from Rebecca’s mind. She took hold of Zoe’s hair and pulled her closer to her sex. Moaning her name, without a trace of her normal self-control. She didn’t care. For once in her life – Rebecca Clare didn’t mind not being in control of herself.

  Chapter 18

  Zoe

  Zoe breathed in deep through her nose. The room smelled of Rebecca. Well, it foremost smelled of sex and of their mingled perfumes, but underneath that she could smell Rebecca’s natural scent on the bedding and obviously on the woman lying on the pillow next to her.

  They were on their sides, facing each other and Rebecca looked… different. The light from the bedside lamp, which Rebecca had switched on when they had finished making love, showed that Rebecca’s usually precise eye makeup was smudged, her lipstick was kissed away, and her hair mussed-up.

  Zoe could see the freckles and slight wrinkles that Rebecca usually hid with makeup. She also saw the warm smile and the searching look of those blue-green eyes. Rebecca looked vulnerable, sweet, and unbelievably beautiful. Zoe’s heart wouldn’t stop hammering at the sight of her.

  “You are so bloody gorgeous. You should have been a model or something. Why are you looking at me like that, though?” she asked Rebecca.

  “Like what?”

  Rebecca’s voice was croaky and her brow furrowed at the question.

  “Like you’re looking for something,” Zoe explained.

  “Perhaps I am. Perhaps I’m wondering what you are thinking?”

  “Why not ask me, then? That’s easier, isn’t it?”

  Rebecca rolled her eyes.

  “Fine. What are you thinking?”

  “Honestly? I was admiring that pretty face of yours. And deciding that your bed smells nice,” Zoe answered.

  Rebecca’s smirk was downright dirty. “It does now. I’m surprised you aren’t dehydrated after that.”

  Zoe knew it was ridiculous but the comment made her self-conscious. She had never been a very confident lover, not even with Rebecca, who had made her so very bold a few hours ago when they crashed through the front door.

  “Oh darling, please don’t look sad. That was a compliment. Not all women can achieve that, you know. Some even say it’s a myth,” Rebecca said with a purr in her voice.

  Zoe reached out and pinched Rebecca’s upper arm. It was childish but it was all she could muster right now.

  “Stop saying ‘that’ in that tone of voice. Can we change the topic?” she asked, noting how grumpy she sounded.

  “Of course, my sweet. How about we try for some sleep? If you want to stay the night, I mean? I understand if you want to get home to your own bed.”

  Zoe scrunched up her nose. “My bed doesn’t have you in it. It’s a flaw that damn bed has suffered from for ages. I’ll stay here, if you don’t mind.”

  Rebecca smiled and Zoe thought she saw relief in that smile.

  “I don’t mind at all. As long as you don’t snore, that is.”

  “I don’t. But I do sleepwalk sometimes.”

  “I’ll make sure to keep you here with me,” Rebecca whispered.

  She moved forward, so close that Zoe felt her breath against her face. Under the duvet, Zoe felt her hands slide in place. One arm in the space between Zoe’s waist and the bed and the other one on Zoe’s hip. They were so close now that under the press of breasts against breasts, Zoe could feel Rebecca’s heartbeat. It started slow, but as they laid so close and looked into each other’s eyes, it quickened.

  “Yeah, that should keep me from wandering off. I’m just gonna nick a kiss before sleep if that’s all right?” Zoe asked, surprised at how hoarse she suddenly sounded.

  “Go ahead,” Rebecca breathed against her lips.

  Zoe leaned in for a kiss. She could taste the tiniest hint of salt on Rebecca’s heart-shaped lips and knew it came from her. Some of her was now a part of Rebecca and vice versa. It was a daunting and yet comforting thought. Most of all, it was intoxicating. Just a few weeks ago, she hadn’t dared to think that Rebecca Clare would even learn her name and now… well, now she could taste her own sex on Rebecca’
s lips. She knew what Rebecca looked like in the throes of passion. She knew how Rebecca liked to be touched and what she was uncomfortable with. Most of all, she knew what it felt like to see Rebecca look at her like she was right now. Like she was a miracle.

  Zoe smiled and closed her eyes to sleep, knowing full well that despite her physical exhaustion, she wasn’t going to go to sleep for a long time. But trying felt nice. Trying to sleep with Rebecca holding her, and breathing on her, and oh-so-softly whispering, “Goodnight my beautiful darling.”

  Chapter 19

  Zoe

  The next day Zoe went home when Rebecca left for work. The trip to Queenswell seemed to sail by; she felt like she was floating and wasn’t even bothered by walking in pigeon poo at the station. When she got home she showered, ate, caught up on the sleep she had missed, and, in between all of this, texted Rebecca.

  It was amazing how many silly reasons she could think up to text Rebecca. It was even more amazing that Rebecca replied to each one as if it had been completely valid and important. Zoe wondered how much work Rebecca was missing due to those texts but considering Rebecca’s replies – she certainly didn’t seem to mind.

  As soon as it was past six, Zoe rushed out of her flat and went to see Jamie. She knew he’d be home by then. He let her in on the first knock and Zoe was surprised to see Helen there.

  “Oi, what are you doing here?”

  “Finished early at work today. Don’t worry, I haven’t been sacked like you.”

  Zoe rolled her eyes. “Charming.” She sat down on the threadbare sofa. “It must have been really early if you had time to shower and then come over here. Cuz you’ve either showered or you’re trying out the wet look with your hair. If you are – it’s not working for ya, love.”

  Jamie and Helen glanced at each other.

  “I caught that look. What?”

  “Um, well, you’ve been really busy with the work stuff and the Rebecca stuff so we might have forgotten to tell you…” Helen said.

  She fidgeted with her hair but didn’t seem to be willing to continue the sentence. Jamie stepped forward instead.

  “Shit, Zoe. We forgot to tell you that we moved in together.”

  “You what?” Zoe exclaimed.

  “Moved in together,” Jamie said, smiling this time.

  “Uh. Okay. When?”

  Helen sat down next to her, at the very edge of the sofa.

  “A few days ago. You’re not mad that we didn’t tell you, are you?”

  “Hel. Is it like me to be mad at something like that?”

  “No. It’s not. But I know you haven’t always been thrilled that your brother and best friend were dating,” Helen said with a look of embarrassment.

  “Nah. I mean, yes it’s weird but I’m used to it. I mean, it’s kinda strange that you two moved in together so fast. “

  Jamie gave a loud, incredulous scoff.

  “We’ve been together for two years, you flippin’ nuisance.”

  Zoe just grinned at him. Next to her, Helen sighed.

  “Jamie. When will you learn that she’s taking the piss out of you? Just leave it.”

  He crossed his arms. “Yeah? You wanna play it like that, Sis? Well, guess what? I know something you don’t.”

  Zoe saw Helen look at him in bewilderment.

  “Uh-huh. Is it the magical trick of losing all your money on online blackjack?”

  He stamped his foot like a child before saying, “Once, Zoe. That happened once!”

  She had him going now and it was far too much fun. It had been a long time since she enjoyed winding him up like this. Everything was more fun today.

  “Okay. So, that’s not it? What on earth is it you know that I don’t, big brother?”

  He looked smug. “Your Rebecca.”

  “Yes? What about her?” Zoe asked.

  Her pulse had picked up. Did Jamie know about them spending the night together?

  “When she leaves work today and you go and meet her. She said you’d planned to meet up in London tonight? Well, when you do. She’ll have a surprise for you. From Darren.”

  “WHAT?”

  Zoe’s outburst made Jamie look taken aback. He did the lip biting thing he always did when he said too much.

  “Shit. I probably shouldn’t have told you that. She wanted to surprise you. She just wanted me and Helen to know because she assumed, and she was right in this, that we’d be bloody furious with him for what he said to you.”

  “Surprise me how, Jamie? Tell me!”

  He rubbed his face with his hand while groaning.

  “Just tell us. You have said this much, you might as well carry on,” Helen said.

  “Bloody bollocks, why do I always do this?” he said before removing his hand from his face and continuing. “She said that she went to see Darren during her lunch hour. She said that the shop already looked a bit messy and that he looked stressed as hell. Still, she gave him a piece of her mind and threatened to bring a solicitor friend of hers into this. Apparently, he caved like a house of cards, and she has an envelope that contains a written apology and some money, I think?”

  Zoe felt so many things at once and wasn’t quite sure where to start. “Money? What did she do? Blackmail him?”

  “Well, no. I mean, I don’t know. Ask her! Go see her tonight and ask her.”

  Zoe stood up. “I can do better than that. I’m going to call her right now.”

  Without saying goodbye, she stormed towards the door. She took her phone out of her pocket and looked for Rebecca’s number as she closed the door behind her and headed for the stairs.

  When Rebecca answered, Zoe was running down the stairs with echoing footfalls.

  Rebecca’s voice sounded warm and happy as she said hello. Zoe was too confused to reply in kind.

  “Yeah, hey, it’s me. What the hell did you say to Darren? What’s happened?”

  “Ah. Jamie spoke to you. Damn. I wish he hadn’t. I really wanted to sit down together and explain,” Rebecca replied.

  Zoe was getting out of breath but somehow it felt good to be on the move during this conversation.

  “Yeah, well, explain it now.”

  “All right. I went to see Darren. I spoke to him about how the two of you had left things and that it was unacceptable for him to treat you that way. I… might have mentioned an acquaintance who specialises in professional disputes and explained to him the sort of situation he would be in if you decided to be less understanding than you have been. At the end of our chat he was quite agreeable.”

  Zoe had stopped at the bottom of the stairs, feeling her anger slowly ebbing. Am I overreacting? Should I be happy she wanted to surprise me by doing something nice for me?

  “Yeah, I bet he was. Go on.”

  “He has agreed to pay your last pay check and add a settlement payment as a well-earned bonus and a thank you for not taking this to court or to the press. I also assisted him in writing an honest, and therefore positive, reference letter for you.”

  Zoe took a deep breath, trying to calm her pounding heart.

  “That was very kind of you and I really, really appreciate the money and the fact that you taught him a lesson so he won’t behave like this to someone else, but Rebecca—”

  “But I should have asked you before talking to him after you made it clear that you wanted him out of your life?” Rebecca interrupted.

  “Yeah.”

  “I knew there was a risk you’d see it like that. But Zoe, I couldn’t let him get away with treating you like that. You were the heart, soul, and brain of that place and you gave it so many years of your life. The things he said would have been unforgivable no matter who it was directed at, but at you, well, that couldn’t stand. I didn’t ask your permission because I knew you would have just let it go, because you are too sweet and you don’t value yourself enough to stand up to someone like him. So, I took a risk, hoping that, with time, you would see that I had to do something. I am sincerely sorry if I upset
you and I will try to never do that again. But Zoe, he had to be stopped.”

  She saw Rebecca’s point. There was still that uncomfortable feeling in the pit of her stomach, though. It screamed that she could look after herself and that no one should make decisions for her. It screamed that she could only rely on herself. Her brain was deciding to join the conversation now. Maybe someone who will help me do the things I can’t or don’t want to do is a good thing? Maybe I should just trust her to want what is best for me? Maybe I should give her a chance?

  She breathed through her nose and didn’t answer Rebecca until her breathing was calm, and her brain and gut instinct had settled on a solution.

  “I see what you were trying to do. And yeah, I get why you didn’t ask me. But I need to make this clear, no matter if it’s best for me or not – I need you to always check with me in the future. If I want to drop it, we both drop it. Okay?”

  “Of course. I see now how my decision to do this without checking with you first was ill-advised. I focused too much on wanting justice for you, and I stepped all over one of my favourite things about you: your independence. I apologise. I’m just used to taking charge and doing what needs to be done. I’ll have to temper that.”

  Zoe smiled as she sighed.

  “Yeah. I think we both have to do some soul-searching and some work if we are going to be in a relationship.”

  “Anything that needs to be done, I am ready to do it. I want you in my life and I’ll make any changes I need to in order to make you want to stay.”

  “That is so sweet. Oh, and I’ll do that too, of course,” Zoe said.

  She stretched her muscles, tense from anger and running.

  “Good. When I see you, I’ll give you the cheque for the money and the USB stick with the word document file containing your glowing reference letter. Will that be tonight? That I see you, I mean?” Rebecca asked carefully.

  “Yep, I haven’t changed my mind, love. I’ll see you tonight.” She laughed. “Maybe in a few hours I will have recovered from the shock of all of that.”

  “I hope so. Although, you do have the most adorable shocked face.”