Shatter Me Whole (Shattered Lives Book 3)

by Barb Shuler

  “Hey, you guys mind taking him out to piddle? It’s been.. I don’t know how long. He’s probably hungry too,” frowning, I sighed. “I’m sorry buddy, we’ll get you something to eat too.” Great, I was now talking to a dog. Or a big puppy. Whatever he was. My legs were asleep from his weight and I didn’t realize it until he jumped down when Lana came over and patted her leg.

  “We’ll be right back,” Derek said, walking out with Lana and Thor, who now had a collar and leash on. I looked up and gave Drew a look.

  “Well we couldn’t just let him wander around without a leash,” he said shrugging as he held the little monkey in his arms.

  “Uh, okay, where is my little man?” had they forgot Elijah or what? I gave Trevor and Anna a look.

  “He’s with his grandpa. Only reason Tyler is here is because she threw a shit- I mean a hissy fit when we tried to leave her behind,” Trevor said, chuckling. “She wanted her Day Day.”

  “Ah, got ya,” I said. I looked up when the waiting room door opened again and Peter came in, moving to my side. He gave my good shoulder a hard squeeze.

  “You scared the piss outta me, asshole,” he said with that stupid ass grin on his face.

  “Language,” Anna scolded but he paid her no mind.

  “Sorry, princess, next time I’ll be more careful,” I said, punching his side.

  “Untle Jatson!” I turned to see little fingers wiggling my way. I chuckled and held up my good arm and let Drew settle her into my lap. I kissed her head as she patted my slinged arm. “No mo boo oos,” she said, wiggling closer.

  “I’m okay, peanut,” I kissed her head and rubbed her back.

  “Any word?” Peter asked before he took a seat by Anna and promptly took Robbie from her.

  “Not yet,” I said, looking down at the little girl in my arms. I leaned down to kiss her head. I ran my fingers through her loose silky curls. I shifted as Tyler curled in more. I braced her up so her head was on my shoulder. I rocked her as best as I could and grinned when I heard her breathing change. A few more minutes and she would be out.

  “Want me to take her,” I looked over to see Dani Lynn looking over at me and I shook my head ‘no’.

  “She’s fine,” I whispered back at her as I relaxed and closed my eyes as I rested my head against Tyler’s. I heard a little shifting and everyone else settled back in their chairs to wait for any word on Kristol.

  An hour later the waiting room door opened again and a man in his mid fifties and a young lady in her late twenties, early thirties came in. I sat up a little straighter.

  “Are you the family of Kristol Jacobs…. Cannon?” I blinked. The Jacobs name alone sent a shiver up my spine. I glanced over at Drew, who had also straightened in his chair. I nodded at the Doc.

  “She’s my girlfriend. We are her family,” I said it with as much truth as I could put into it.

  He nodded before he spoke. “I’m Doctor Hill. Miss Jacobs did well with both surgeries. Her arm has a metal plate and two screws holding her radius together. That’s the bone in your arm, the one that runs along here,” he said, demonstrating which bone it was. I nodded.

  “Can I see her now?”

  “Not yet, Mr…” the pretty blonde said a little unsure of who I was.

  “Officer Landry, call me Jackson. I was brought in with her. Please, is she really all right?”

  “As soon as she is out of the recovery bay, for good this time, we will take her to the third floor and you may see her then. Her injuries, though they may seem bad on the surface, could have been a lot worse. As I said, her arm will heal and she should have no lasting effects of the break. Except she’ll know when it’s gonna rain,” he gave a nod and I thanked him silently for the joke. It seemed to bring down the room’s anxiety.

  “She has multiple broken ribs, contusions and there are a few burns on her back, accompanying yet another contusion. The most concerning part, other than watching for infection, is the stab wound on her thigh. It was rather deep. We cleaned it out, and it’s been stitched back together. It too should heal fine,” he finished and then stepped back and let the woman come forward.

  “I’m Doctor Grant, I assisted with Miss Cannon’s surgery as well. I’m sorry to have to tell you, but she lost the baby. There was too much trauma for her body and the baby was aborted. We had to take her back in, which is why you have been waiting so long. We thought she was hemorrhaging but it wasn’t as serious. She was given a DNC to make sure that she was clean on the inside,” she said patting my hand. I just blinked.

  Baby? What the actual fuck? I opened my mouth to say something but then stopped. What in the fuck could I say to that. I had no idea she was fucking pregnant. Did she know?

  “Mr. Landry, it’s not my place to say this, but I can see you care for her…”

  “Doctor Grant, mind yourself,” the other doctor said. I glared at him.

  “What?” my voice came out hard. Her eyes widened a bit and she stepped back.

  “There is a lot of scarring, both vaginally and in the lower region. Miss Cannon seems to have been through a lot of trauma. She will need to have plenty of rest.. And to take it easy,” she said, nodding nervously.

  Did she think I had done that to her? The look on her face sure as hell said she did. I stood up from the wheelchair - albeit a bit clumsily, thank God Dani Lynn had taken Tyler from me earlier. If not I could have toppled us both onto the floor. I glared at both Doctors.

  “If you’re insinuating I did any of that to her, you’ve lost your fucking minds. I’d never fucking hurt her,” I said, chest heaving.

  I glanced to the side when I saw Drew step up to me. I jerked my arm away as he grabbed me.

  “Jackson,” he warned.

  “No, they will not make it sound like I did that to her,” I snapped.

  I took in a deep breath and slowly made my way past them, cursing to myself as I stormed out of the room, weaving slightly, welcoming the pain that shot through me. Fucking bastards.

  Whoever hurt her was going to pay. One way or the other.

  9

  Nightmares come True

  Kristol

  There was that damn buzzing sound again. What was it? Was I dead? It was really bright, wherever I was. My eyes finally cracked slightly and I winced from the pain that seethed through my body. I closed my eyes back and let the darkness once again take me back in it’s warm embrace.

  * * *

  When I heard my name being called I hid behind the woodpile where I knew he couldn’t see me. I knew what Travis wanted. Or better yet, what he expected Conner to do. He’d already warned me once… this time I’d have to let him do it. It was his right as a man to claim me. I was only there to be used as he saw fit. Willie had already taken my virginity. It cost him a set of blue balls that I hoped still hurt. I also sliced a gash in the fucker’s face.

  Then, Mama beat me for not letting the men have what they wanted.

  Seriously, she put me in this place. She did this. It’s all her fucking fault. I wish I knew who my dad was, and where in the fuck he was. I wanted out of here. It all started when I turned thirteen… my period happened, and the abuse I was put through changed.

  Now, I was simply used as a whore for the bastards around here. I tried to run away when I was fourteen. That only resulted in an asswhoopin’.

  A few months ago I tried again, and was attacked in the woods by Clinton Reeves, a newer member to the band of backwoods fucktards. He gave me the creeps.. And honestly, he was one sadistic SOB.

  The only solace I’ve had has been the last ten and a half months. I was off limits for the simple fact that I was pregnant and of course, nursing. Yes, at age fifteen I was knocked up, and a week after I turned sixteen I gave birth to a baby. A boy at that. Clinton now thinks that he is the shit. He is, just not the good kind like he thinks. My body convulses in disgust every time he is around. I do my damndest to avoid the lot of them. I stay in the women’s house and stay to myself. I do the chores that are ex
pected, so I don’t get hit, but other than that.. Nope, I just hide away with my baby boy.

  I still can’t believe I had a baby. He is so perfect. Ten fingers, ten toes, a head full of brown hair like mine, and my little nose. Thankfully he looks nothing like his so called father. And, as God as my witness, if it’s the last thing I do, I will make damn sure he doesn’t grow up in this hell hole.

  He will know that men are no better than women. I will not let them corrupt him. He is my gift from God. You can say what you want about that. He may not have been conceived from a happy situation, but he gives my life light. The darkness that had been building in me has dissipated. I no longer cry at night because I haven’t had the guts to cut my own wrists. Or throw myself off a roof. Anything to end the pain I live with. My sweet little Taylor helps me do that. He gives me a reason to live. A reason to fight.

  I was pulled from my musings as a twig behind me broke. I jumped up, turning to see who was there and came face to face with Willie. My heart stopped and I sneered. If I showed fear he made it worse.

  “Fuck off, you sicko!” I threw a piece of chopped wood at him.

  I took off running across the back yard. If I could get inside I’d be safe. Fuck the laundry - which was what I had originally come out for - it would wait until later. I was tackled to the ground, flipped over and slapped across the face. The glare that met my gaze made me panic. Willie was going to make this hurt. I just knew it.

  “Willie! Stop fucking around, bring the bitch to the cabin. Now!” I glanced over at my step-father, aka the devil. Before I could brace myself, Willie was dragging me to the cabin. The cabin meant I was in serious trouble. The last time Clinton took me in there I was bent over a sawhorse with my hands tied to my ankles. He proceeded to paddle me until I sobbed from the pain. Then he shoved himself into me over and over until he got off. I was left there for what felt like hours. Willie had been sent to retrieve me from chores…. But of course, he had to get his dick wet first.

  Screaming, I tried to fight his grip, but it was no use. I only stopped when he snatched me up. The pain shooting through my scalp as he tightened his grip around my hair pulled a cry from me. I swallowed hard and was shoved into the door and a hard body was slammed in behind me. I hit the wall with a hard ‘thump’, the breath leaving my lungs. The mass moved and I heard Travis call out as the door shut, leaving us in an almost dark place.

  “Connor, you know what to do. Come out when you’re done.”

  I turned to see Connor - who is only a year younger than I am - standing there with a cocky grin on his face. “You get to be my first,” he said, as he stalked towards me.

  Oh, hell no. I blocked his approach and kicked him in the thigh, missing his nuts - which is where I was aiming. Fucker moved fast. He grabbed me, my feet left the floor and I screamed as I thrashed, clocking him in the face with the back of my head. He grunted and dropped me unceremoniously onto my ass so he could cup his face. I took the advantage and stood. My fist went out and I punched him in the stomach. When he tipped forward I brought my knee up to meet with his face. He screamed and I spun away, kicking out to hit him in the side of his knee. He went over like a fucking tree. I stomped on his dick eliciting another agony filled shriek from him. The door burst open and I was tackled to the floor by Willie. I fought, but he was so much bigger than I was. I had no advantage like I had gotten with Conner.

  That night I was tied back to that same sawhorse, my hands bound to my ankles and was paddled until I passed out from the pain. I have no idea exactly what was done to me….

  When I woke again I was in a room, tied to the bed on my stomach. Old lady Cross was hovering over me with some kind of salve. The coolness was a relief to my ass, thighs and my lower back. She was the only one here I tried to trust. She had looked out after and for me as a child, and even now… she was the one here taking care of my wounds.

  * * *

  A loud crash pulled me from the darkness and I tried to blink my eyes open. I heard a baby crying and my heart skipped a beat. Then another baby started crying. Followed by cursing.

  “Taylor… Ryan…” I mumbled as I tried to pull myself from the darkness. My eyes just wouldn’t open. There was light, but I couldn’t see a damn thing.

  I started to panic. One arm sorta worked but the other… it was not there, or if it was, I couldn’t feel it. I tried to sit up, a scream leaving my lips before someone’s hand was on my cheek. It was warm but the touch made me brace for more pain.

  “Kristol, hey, relax, honey. It’s Dani Lynn Landry. You remember me from downstairs?” she asked, her voice low, calm even. I swallowed and nodded gently only to wish I hadn’t. A pain shot through me and I took in a sharp breath.

  “Lay back, babe. You have a fair amount of injuries. We don’t want to make them worse. When you woke you said the names Taylor and Ryan, who are they? Is that your family? Can I call them and tell them where you are?”

  I froze. My entire body stiffened and my jaw clenched. Had I actually said their names out loud? My mind was fuzzy. The harder I tried to figure out what was going on the more I started to panic. My chest heaved and I shook my head quickly. Then groaned as the pain started up again.

  “Here,” I heard a familiar voice say from my other side.

  “Jackson…” before I could think I whispered his name.

  “I’m here, baby, so is someone else,” he said. I heard a little shuffling and then a cold nose was pressed to my cheek. My arm went around the little warm body that pressed against me.

  “Thor.. oh God,” I started to cry as he licked my face. I buried my face in his fur and let his presence soothe my frazzled nerves. It took me a few minutes to get myself under control. I raised my hand and whispered, “Jackson.”

  A warm hand took mine and I swallowed hard, the emotions building up in me again. There was a wild beeping sound around me but I tuned it out. I let Thor and Jackson’s closeness wash over me before I spoke again. “Thank you…”

  “Hey, nothing to thank me for, beautiful. You don’t worry about anything except getting better,” he said as he gave my hand a gentle squeeze. I could feel the tiredness in my body, the pain, the overall emotional roller coaster I had been on for so long came crashing down. I sniffled, scared that I was going to be found.

  What if I really wasn’t safe here? What would I do? Where could I go? I needed to think of Taylor and Ryan. I had to get my babies out of there. I had to. They were my everything. I would find a way. I would.

  * * *

  Jackson

  * * *

  Hearing her ask for me after so many hours of sitting and waiting for her to wake up had my chest tightening. Fear, happiness… it was all too much. I held her hand in mine and rested my head on her bed. That was where I spent the next two days.

  I’d had to tell her everything she missed. The doctors had also given her a complete rundown of her injuries. I could feel the emotions running off of her but she took it all in silence. It wasn't time to push her for answers, not yet.

  When the doc came in to remove the bandages from her face, and to check her eyes I gave her a gentle smile. It was the third day she’d been stuck in this bed. She was gorgeous, even covered in bruises, stitches and filled with enough pain meds to kill an elephant. It was after the Doctor came in on day five to say she would be able to go home the next morning that she flipped out again.

  It took some finagling, and all but threatening to make them keep her here for her to tell me about how she had been living at the gas station. How Jimmy had been charging her half of each paycheck to sleep on a cot in the back store room. Talk about fighting back anger. When I got my hands on him I was going to beat the stupid asshole to death.

  I reassured her she and Thor would have a nice place to stay. That it was a safe and secure location where there would be people to help her everyday until she was up and moving on her own again. I wanted to take her to my place. My house was empty, it was just me and five bedrooms, but I knew t
hat would be pushing her. She was already a scared rabbit… I didn’t want to make it worse.

  Until we knew more about her I couldn’t take the chance that she would run away. So, after a chat with Dani Lynn it was settled. She’d be staying at the center in one of the small apartments. She and Thor would have food, shelter and me there to watch after them. Well, until I was back at a desk. Small steps. It was all a game of cat and mouse.

  I needed her to grow to trust me so I could find out what really happened to her before that fire, because for now, she refused to talk about it at all.

  10

  Keeping Secrets

  Jackson

  Over the last two weeks things had started to calm down a little around here. When I could, I spent my free time with Kristol. Most of that time was spent outside in the backyard of the center watching Thor play in the grass. Or listening as she told me all about the flowers in the beds Dani Lynn and Stella had set up as a therapy garden. That part seemed to be doing its job. I was waiting for her to open up more about that night.

  I'd been there when the Doctor told her she'd lost the baby. The look on her face had me out of the chair beside her and pulling her to me as she cried. It wasn't until the Doc had left that she'd told me that the baby was from her being taken advantage of. She had been raped and that thought alone, the thought that someone could do that to an innocent girl, made the protective side of me pop out more. Made me wish I never had to leave her side.

  We had grown closer since the night I rescued her. There was just something about this girl that made me - as Drew would say - turn into her very own Superman. I wanted to protect her. I needed to. It hurt to think of her being hurt because I wasn’t there to protect her.