Summer's Path

by Scott Blum

  Don was whisked from one painful place to another, deep within the organs of his previous body. He began to anticipate Robert’s expression of his deepest fears, although it didn’t make it any less startling when Don heard the actual words— especially when it came to Suzanne.

  “She’ll meet someone better looking, with more money.…

  “She’ll discover I’m a fraud … how damaged I am … that I’m lying … that I’m too clingy.…

  “She’ll see who I really am … and then she’ll leave me!”

  Don’s head began to swirl, and he felt like he was going to be sick. Because his eyes were closed, he didn’t have any sense of up or down and began to question whether he was still on the bed. He could no longer distinguish where his old human body ended and his new puppy one began.

  “She’s going to leave me,” Robert sobbed. “I know she’s going to leave me.”

  Robert fell into silence for several seconds before yelling more loudly than he had all day: “Why does everybody always leave me?!”

  Don couldn’t control himself anymore and began violently convulsing on the bed. His paws scratched at the sheets until he heard the comforter and pillows fall to the floor. He felt Robert whisk him to another part of his body—this time to the lungs.

  “Why does everybody always leave me?” Robert cried.

  Don could only hear every other word as Robert struggled for air between hiccups.

  “My … mother … left … me,” Robert gasped. “My … father … left … me.”

  Don logically knew that both of his parents had died from a disease they couldn’t control, but he had always felt in his heart that they intentionally left him because he wasn’t a good baby.

  “Why … did … they … leave … me?

  “What … did … I … do … wrong?

  “Why … did … she … hate … me?

  “Mommies … aren’t … supposed … to hate … their … babies!”

  Don felt more anger in his soul than he ever had in his life. There was something profoundly liberating about feeling his emotions outwardly expressed, and he began to regret not doing it more often.

  After lying still for several minutes, Don noticed that the pain in his old abdomen was significantly less intense than it had been before. His entire torso seemed several pounds lighter, and the darkness that had engulfed his pancreas was also much lighter. The pain was definitely still present, but it was many degrees less pervasive than it had been before.

  “Is it gone?” asked Don.

  “Is what gone?”

  “The cancer.”

  “Not completely,” replied Robert. “But it’s mostly dislodged from the organs, and it should be a lot easier to expel now that it’s moving around freely.”

  Don was exhausted as he felt Robert guide him back into his puppy body. However, when he returned, there was one thing he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about. “Am I a horrible person because I was angry at my mother for dying?”

  “Of course not—it’s just what you felt, that’s all. It’s perfectly natural to feel angry when a parent dies.”

  “Because logically she couldn’t have intended to die, right?”

  Robert remained silent.

  “Right?” repeated Don.

  “Anything’s possible,” Robert replied cryptically. “But now it’s time for you to return to your new mother.”

  Robert carried him into the garage, and quietly set him down next to his puppy siblings. Don felt comforted by his new family, which seemed remarkably less complicated than the memories of his human one.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Why are you ignoring me?” Suzanne asked after yet another meal of sliced fruit and French bread.

  “I’m not ignoring you,” Robert said. “I just don’t have anything to say.”

  “It’s not what you say; it’s how you’re acting.”

  “I’m fine.” He looked up briefly from his food and smiled.

  “You’re not fine. We’re not fine. You’re always ignoring me.”

  “I’m not ignoring you.” He raised his voice slightly. “I’m just focusing all my energy on recovering right now.”

  Suzanne was thankful he was concentrating on recovering. Less than a month ago, she had been positive that her husband had given up his will to live and was on the way out. It was true that a remarkable shift had taken place where he was genuinely trying to get better, and it seemed to be working. However, it was also becoming increasingly difficult to ignore the fact that his personality was changing as well. Before, she had been his whole life, almost to the point of his smothering her at times. But now she felt like he didn’t care if she was around or not—it was as if they had become roommates.

  “I just feel lonely, that’s all,” Suzanne said quietly.

  “That’s why we got you a dog,” Robert said flippantly.

  Her husband’s words felt like a slap in the face. “Why would you say such a thing?”

  “You heard the doctor,” replied Robert. “There isn’t any hope for me recovering completely. It’s just a matter of time.”

  “But you’re getting so much better. Maybe we should go to the doctor and see if it’s in remission.”

  “There’s no point,” Robert said. “We both know it’s a waste of money. Let’s just enjoy one day at a time.”

  Suzanne had been trying to do just that, but with her husband’s remarkable recovery, she started to let herself hope that the cancer would somehow go away.

  They both sat in the dining room without speaking—the clinking sounds of silverware on plates filling the uncomfortable silence. After several minutes, Suzanne reached over to caress her husband’s scruffy face, and he quickly pulled away from her.

  “When are you going to shave?” she asked.

  “I’m not going to,” he said matter-of-factly.

  “Why not?” She was genuinely surprised by his answer. Until recently, he had shaved every day since she’d known him. “Doesn’t it bug you?”

  “No, it feels good. Much more natural than scraping my hair off every day.”

  “I’m going to bed,” Suzanne sighed. “Are you coming?”

  “No, I’m going to visit the puppies. I’ll be in shortly.”

  “I was thinking,” said Don, “maybe I should stay here.”

  Don had gotten used to communicating with Robert telepathically, and it was becoming second nature. It was only slightly different from when they were both in the same body, yet their connection was still remarkably strong.

  “You can’t stay here, Don. Our souls made an agreement.”

  “But … maybe I should stay so I can take care of Suzanne.”

  “I hate to break it to you, but you’re a dog now. Suzanne needs a human to take care of her.”

  “But I can love her.”

  “You already have. Now it’s someone else’s turn.”

  The thought of Suzanne with someone else made Don much angrier than he had thought it would, and he tried his best to focus instead on the love he received from his new mother. Sadie was incredibly nurturing, and he felt safe and happy for the first time in years. “I like it here,” Don finally said.

  “Suzanne can’t keep nine dogs anyway. She’s probably going to give most of the puppies away in the next few weeks while they’re still cute.”

  That saddened Don immensely. There was an intense bond between all of his puppy siblings, and he couldn’t imagine them being split up. “Maybe someone would want all of us?”

  “Not likely. Come on, Don—I know your new instincts are difficult to ignore, but you’re going to have to accept your destiny. You’re no longer a human, and you aren’t entirely a dog either. You’ve been saved from having to learn all your life lessons over again, but from here on out you’re going to need to trust me. When I say we have to leave, we have to leave. We’re inexorably tied together for the rest of this lifetime, and like it or not, I have a lot to do here. So say your goodbyes and
get ready to go.”

  Don closed his eyes as tightly as possible and grunted.

  “Okay?” Robert asked.

  Don curled into a furry ball and pretended to be asleep.

  “Come on, let’s go,” Robert said aloud.

  Don whimpered sheepishly. “Can I say goodbye to Suzanne?”

  “It’s not possible; she’s already asleep.” Robert was growing impatient.

  “Can’t I at least look at her one more time?” Don’s eyes had finally opened a few days earlier.

  “Oh, all right”—Robert sighed—“but you have to be quiet.”

  Robert picked up the small puppy and quietly walked through the house to the bedroom door. When they arrived, he gestured for Don to be silent by placing his index finger to his lips, and the puppy nodded. Slowly he opened the door, and they saw Suzanne lying in the bed, her long hair spread out on the pillow and her soft lips slightly parted to allow deep breaths to escape through her mouth. Don remembered the first time they had spent the night together: he had watched her sleep all night, enamored with how her hidden night beauty had revealed itself when she began to dream.

  When they first started dating, they would often joke about visiting each other in their dreams. In light of recent events, Don was inclined to believe it had actually happened, and he decided to try it one last time.

  He closed his eyes and concentrated as hard as he could. Through the darkness he saw a young Suzanne appear, being pushed on a merry-go-round in a small-town park. She had shown him a photo of this place many times before, as it reminded her of her dad. Don stood next to Suzanne’s father in the park and watched her spin around, her ponytails bobbing up and down as she held tightly to the galvanized-metal rails. He thought he saw a glance of recognition directed at him while she quickly spun around. Her eyes became a window to their future, and he saw their entire life together flash before him in an instant.

  Gradually, the park began to fade, and Don found himself standing in darkness. He felt Robert nudge him, and when he opened his eyes, he saw the clock glowing 11:11 on the nightstand next to his wife’s pillow.

  “Ready?” Robert asked telepathically.

  After Don nodded, they slowly backed out of the room, and Robert quietly closed the door behind them.

  Robert carried him outside through the garage door and walked down the pathway to the rusted off-white Land Cruiser parked in front of the house.

  “This one, right?” he asked the puppy as he opened the squeaky passenger door.

  Don responded by jumping out of Robert’s arms and onto the ripped upholstered passenger seat. Don loved his Land Cruiser. It was the first car he had bought when he graduated from college, and it was built like a tank. He seldom made full use of the four-wheel drive, but even on city streets it gave him a feeling of invincibility that he lacked when he wasn’t behind the wheel.

  Robert got in on the driver’s side, started the engine, and turned on the headlights. He sat motionless with his hands on the wheel and closed his eyes tightly.

  “Haven’t you ever driven a stick?” asked Don.

  Robert pushed the leftmost pedal to the floorboard and used both hands to force the gearshift into first. He looked at the puppy quizzically and shrugged his shoulders.

  “The parking brake!” Don found it hard to contain his frustration. He’d never let anyone drive his car before, and it didn’t seem like Robert knew how to drive at all.

  “Oh, right.” Robert released the lever and let out the clutch. The Land Cruiser surged forward and threw the small puppy to the back of the seat. After nearly half a block of stopping and starting, Robert appeared to get the hang of it, and they slowly rolled past the stop sign at the end of their street.

  “Stop sign!… Do you want me to drive?” Don asked without thinking.

  They simultaneously burst into laughter and continued to chuckle through the winding streets until they reached the highway. After about ten minutes, they merged onto Interstate 5.

  “Where are we going?” asked Don.

  “First we’re going to take care of your legacy, then on to our destiny.” Robert laughed.

  “My legacy? What does that mean?”

  “You wanted to die, right? So the first thing we need to do is make sure everyone thinks that’s exactly what happened.”

  “How are we going to do that?”

  “Don’t worry; you’re not actually going to die. We’re just going to make it look that way.”

  “Is that really necessary?”

  “Isn’t that sweet?” Robert laughed. “Three weeks as a dog, and you’ve already rediscovered your will to live.”

  “Very funny.” Don wasn’t amused. “I’m just worried it will crush Suzanne. Maybe I can just disappear.”

  “Suzanne is the main reason you need to die— or at least appear to. She’s going to need closure, and the most compassionate thing you can do is give her the opportunity to move on as quickly as possible. And besides, she’ll find your letter first thing tomorrow morning.”

  “You left the letter I wrote?”

  “Yep, it’s on her desk chair.”

  Don had forgotten about the suicide note. “Why did you do that?”

  “I told you why I did it—Suzanne needs closure. It’s not like you have a choice anyway. Do you really think she’s going to stay married to a dog?”

  “Why are you such a jerk sometimes?”

  “Come on, Don, we’re going to have a great time. Just think of this as the beginning of your next adventure.”

  Don curled up in a ball on the ripped car seat and closed his eyes. He started to get depressed and wondered if he should have killed himself when he still had a chance. In some ways he felt as if he were being played like a puppet by Robert and was no longer in control of his own life.

  They continued heading south on the freeway through central Oregon. The night was clear, and the full moon illuminated the road with an otherworldly silver light. There were very few other vehicles on the freeway, just an occasional logging truck that appeared to be bringing raw lumber to California. After a couple of hours, they came to a series of mountain passes that challenged both the Land Cruiser and Robert’s driving ability.

  “Slow down!” Don said after he was thrust against the passenger door when Robert took a curve too quickly. “This isn’t a sports car—it has a much higher center of gravity. You need to take it easy!”

  “But the engine seemed like it was going to die when I slowed down.”

  “You have to shift into second gear.”

  Robert attempted to downshift without pressing the clutch pedal, and the transmission made a horrible grinding sound.

  “The clutch!” Don said telepathically while letting out a very puppylike yelp.

  Robert quickly depressed the clutch and downshifted. “Thanks, I forgot.”

  Ascending the mountains was slow going in second gear, and several logging trucks passed them on the winding two-lane freeway. They continued to make their way through the mountains, and after nearly half an hour of winding through the passes, a road sign caught Robert’s attention.

  “Merlin! That sounds interesting. Have you ever been to Merlin?”

  “Nope,” said Don. “Never been.”

  “Well, tonight’s your lucky night,” Robert said as he took the next exit. “We’re going to Merlin to conclude your legacy.”

  Don sat up to see outside the passenger window as they approached Merlin. There wasn’t a town center to speak of, and within just a few minutes the sporadic houses and occasional mini-mall had been replaced by a densely populated forest of tall evergreens.

  “Is that it?” Don asked. “My legacy is going to conclude in the middle of some random forest?”

  “Be patient. I feel something calling us farther up the road.”

  They continued to wind through the pitch-black forest, which was illuminated by their headlights and an occasional moonbeam. After about fifteen minutes, they approached a
nother sign that caught Robert’s attention.

  “‘Hellgate Canyon,’” Robert read the sign aloud. “This must be it.”

  “That sounds ominous—I don’t know if I like that.”

  Robert swerved off the road to the widened dirt viewing area. As soon as they rolled to a dusty stop, he unbuckled his seat belt and jumped down from the Land Cruiser. He quickly walked around and opened the passenger door for Don. The puppy stared at him without moving before Robert picked him up and gently placed him down on the ground.

  Suzanne had regularly complained about how tall the Land Cruiser was after Don put the extralarge wheels on, and even refused to ride in it after she had a very unladylike experience exiting it while wearing a dress. Don always liked how high the small vehicle was—it made him feel safe since he could see above all the cars in front of him. But in his new form, he wasn’t sure if he still liked it as much.

  “I don’t see anything,” said Don. “Are you sure this is the right place?”

  “Follow me.” Robert led the puppy several steps to the edge of a steep cliff overlooking the canyon below. The full moon illuminated the sharp rock edges, and its reflection shimmered on the water below that flowed into three distinct pools connected by a sinewy river. As they approached the edge of the cliff, Don got vertigo and instinctively took a step back in order to soak in the moonlit beauty from a safer distance.

  “I feel weird,” Don said plainly.

  “The energy here is intense. There’s a lot of history trapped in these boulders. Many dreams have been crushed, and several people have lost their lives here. Their spirits remain, and some still aren’t sure what happened to them.”

  “How did they die?”

  “I’m not sure—mostly tragic accidents, I think. Drowning, perhaps.”

  “I don’t like it here.”

  Robert walked around the edge of the kneehigh rock wall and came to a bouquet of wilted flowers next to a small photograph of a teenage girl that was encased in a plastic bag. “Look at this,” he said. “I think it’s some sort of memorial. It looks like Sarah took this corner a little too fast.”

  Don joined Robert next to the makeshift memorial. He glanced at the flowers briefly and noticed tiny shards of glass and reflective plastic that glimmered on the ground nearby. “You’re morbid,” he said. “Do you get pleasure out of all this? I want to go—let’s leave.”