Shady Oaks

by Jerry Boyd

  Ozzie sang out, “Quick fried to a crackly crunch, Boss!”

  “Thank you! Home again, home again, jiggity jig.”

  I commed Topper. “Topper, are you at a place where you could push the 6X6 out of the shop?”

  “We need to bleed the hydraulics, and we’ll be done, Boss.”

  “How long?”

  “Taz is closing the fitting now. You’re bringing us more work?”

  “Saucer with a missile impact. I haven’t seen it yet, comm Ozzie for details.”

  “You need space in front of the door for the freighter?”

  “Yes. Tell me when you’re ready.”

  “I will, Boss.”

  I heard that big diesel fire up. Topper moved it out and shut it back down. “Ready, Boss.”

  “30 seconds out.”

  “Tina, could you fly it into the shop? It would be simpler that way.”

  “Sure, Bob.”

  She commed Mike. “Sergeant Darning, Fly into the shop, please. Then shut down and exit the vehicle.”

  I asked, “You have anyone who needs medical attention?”

  “Yes.”

  “Could you bring them aboard the freighter, please?”

  She went to help Mike get their wounded onboard.

  After a few minutes, Mike stuck his head in the cockpit. “Ready to fly, Bob.”

  I saw the ramp was already coming up. I let it close before I lifted. I commed Max. “Hey Max, I have some causalities aboard. Are you good enough running the ‘doc to get them squared away, or do we need John?”

  “Unless they’re in horrible shape, the ‘doc can do it all automatically. Even a caveman could do it.”

  I looked at Mike. “How are they?”

  “Automatic will be fine.”

  “Okay, Max. Mike says automatic is good enough. I’m landing out front.”

  Mike headed back to the cargo bay. When I was down and idling, I joined him. Ozzie was starting down the ramp with the worst case. I helped Mike with the other one. We got them downstairs. Ozzie put his in an autodoc and started removing her uniform. Mike and I started on our fellow. I noticed one of the other ‘docs was in use. I commed John. “Johnathan, I’m in your basement. You have a visitor. Were you aware?”

  “Sorry, Bob. I meant to tell you. You didn’t see him, you don’t know who he is, and you like his computer work very much. Yes, he passed acceptable contact before I put him in.”

  “Didn’t mean to put my nose where it didn’t belong, John. You have two extra visitors, one looks short term, the other may take longer.”

  “What happened?”

  “Mike and Tina had a tracker aboard. Caught a missile, a couple of their crew were injured. Saucer took some damage, the boys are on it, surely they can have it cleared by morning.”

  “All this going on, and you’re worried about my love life?”

  “The rest of it is stuff we know how to do.”

  “You got a point. Good thing you still have hair enough to cover it.”

  “Talk to you later.”

  “Bye.”

  I asked Ozzie to get back on the freighter, so I could run him back to the shop. I turned to Mike. “I’ll be back in a few minutes. Max can take care of anything you need.”

  “That sounds fine, Bob.”

  I went out front and got aboard, starting the ramp up as I went by. Ozzie delivered, I put the freighter back in John’s barn. Then I moved my truck up in front of the house, and went in to get the whole story. Max said, “There’s Bob now. Go ahead and tell your story.”

  Tina said, “Jump in, Mike, if I forget something. We were on a routine reconnaissance mission, nothing we hadn’t done a hundred times before. Mike and I were letting our two trainees get some flying time in. One of your newer planes has good enough stealth it’s tricky to see on the scanner if you don’t know what to look for. A flight of two of them was on our tail before we noticed them. They had a missile away before we could respond. The trainees were both wounded when the missile exploded. Mike and I took control, and were able to return to orbit, out of missile range.”

  “Do either of you have an idea who may have tagged you?”

  “We talked it over while we were waiting. We don’t.”

  “Have you run your badge recordings to see if they picked up anything?”

  “Not yet. Usually that’s part of mission debriefing.”

  “Somebody at your base tried to get you killed. Maybe it’s worth a look.”

  They started in on the video. I grabbed a Frisbee and took Snitz outside. He was still tired from yesterday, and didn’t want to play very long. We sat on the porch while I petted him.

  Mike came out to get me. “You were right, Bob. We have video of the inside tracker being planted. Our crew chief did it.”

  “Not a Mendum, by any chance?”

  “Yes, Millous Mendum. I think you know his father, Mickolec?”

  “Know him? We just arrested him for dereliction of duty.”

  “Oh, I’m not up on current events, obviously.”

  “Excuse me a second, I need to make a call.”

  I commed Lyla. “Bob! Is Random okay? What happened now?”

  “Random was okay when I saw her last. She and Nikki took off for Guide headquarters last night. I have more info for your story, if you want it.”

  “Of course, Bob. I’m sorry, it just seems like every time I get a call from you or Nikki, it’s bad news about Random.”

  “She does seem to be a trouble magnet. Maybe once she has a new partner, things will settle down.”

  “New partner? What happened, Bob?”

  “Dingus arrested Mickolec for endangering Random. He wasn’t following procedure, and put her in peril.”

  “That’s why they’re headed to headquarters?”

  “Nikki wouldn’t have had to go if Mickolec hadn’t managed to get some of the squad who came to get him to help him try to escape. They took over a saucer. We had to run them down and explain the error in their ways. The sergeant didn’t have enough people to get her prisoners and both saucers back safely, so Nikki volunteered to go with them. She’s still considered active duty, since technically she’s supervising all of us.”

  “You always make things sound so easy, Bob. I’ll have to talk to Random and Nikki, get the real story. You called about something else, I take it?”

  “Random told you about the Mendum family, right? It seems their misdeeds extend another generation. Young Millous, Mickolec’s son, sabotaged a Patrol craft coming here on routine reconnaissance. They caught a missile and had to be rescued. I’ve just been informed there is video evidence of the deed.”

  “The Mendums and the Rottums have been up to no good for a long time, Bob. This proves they aren’t done yet. Thanks. Talk to you later.”

  “Bye.”

  I turned to Mike. “Looks like you’re here for a while. Anything special you want to do while you’re here?”

  “I’d like to figure out why we keep getting trackers put on us.”

  “I have to think it has something to do with being associated with the Slongum family. Seems like the Rottums and the Mendums are feuding with them, but I’ve not heard of any bad blood going the other way.”

  Max and Tina came out. Max said, “Talking about my family?”

  I replied, “No offense, Max. You folks do seem to be the center of all this nonsense.”

  “None taken. I agree it seems like the Rottums have it in for us, but I don’t understand why.”

  “From what Lyla said, about what you told her, it almost seems like Dingus managed to win your Mom away from the Major’s Dad. The elder Mr. Rottum didn’t accept it, and set out to win her back. I assume they’re afraid that now Dingus isn’t lost anymore, the whole sad tale will come to light.”

  “I don’t think Dad’s all that upset about it, really. It almost seems like he enjoyed his time being marooned.”

  “He would have had to come to terms with it, or it would h
ave torn him up emotionally. He definitely seemed glad to see you when he woke up, even if he did still treat you like a little boy for a while.”

  “I guess that’s right. It’s still hard to square the idea I had of him growing up with the reality of who he is.”

  “Cut yourself some slack. You thought he was dead for over a hundred years. Now he just turns up. Nobody is going to deal with that well.”

  “I suppose you’re right. I’ve been kicking myself for being so confused. I feel like I should just be happy that Dad is back. It’s hard to change how you think about somebody so suddenly.”

  “Give it time. A hundred years of bad feelings aren’t going away in a few weeks. He’s having trouble, too.”

  “No. He seems fine.”

  “Then why did he take me up on the hill, and not you?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Do you even know what’s up there?”

  “I didn’t hear anyone say, why?”

  “You know he had Topper paint his bike to look like a horse called Sunshine, right?”

  “I gathered that much.”

  “Sunshine is buried on top of that hill. Gravestone and all. He must have really loved that horse, to go to all that trouble. Don’t you think that’s the kind of thing he would have shared with his son, if he was really okay with everything?”

  “I suppose you’re right. It’s just hard to imagine the “Great Dingolus Songum’ being upset about anything.”

  “He’s human, or whatever you all call yourselves. You don’t get a pass on emotions, just because somebody thinks you did great deeds.”

  Tina spoke up. “Bob, how do you know so much about it?”

  “Lots of time alone, trying to figure out how to feel about my Dad, I suppose.”

  We all sat quiet for a few minutes. I said, “It’s getting toward supper time. I’ve got chili cooking at my place, if anybody’s interested.”

  They all thought that sounded okay. Tina was a little worried, but Max assured her she would enjoy it. It hit me we wouldn’t all fit in my truck. “I’ll go get Nikki’s rig, and I’ll be right back.”

  Snitz jumped in the truck. He couldn’t make it all the way to the seat in one jump yet, but it didn’t look like it would be long. I wondered how he would handle the 6X6. Problem for another day. I called John. “Hey pardner, how’s it going?”

  “Bob, how is it you sound like you’re selling something?”

  “Just calling to say there’s gonna be chili at my place tonight, and there’s plenty.”

  “You have plenty of beer?”

  “Wouldn’t hurt to pick some up, if you’re offering.”

  “That all you need me to bring?”

  “What did you have in mind? Ornery little boys who like to play Frisbee?”

  “New from Hasbro, Matchmaker Bob. Bullshit not included.”

  “At least it’s better than you bozos going on about capes.”

  “You mean a daring rescue of a stricken Patrol craft, holed and helpless? Space Trucker Bob, to the rescue!”

  “Have you got the boys printing up the action figures already?”

  “I’ll never tell.”

  “You think Dee and Dingus can make it for supper?”

  “After the week Dee’s had? The sideways will be strong.”

  “How did Dingus like his ride to work this morning?”

  “He’s had this weird gleam in his eye all day. I think you’re just before building him a G-machine.”

  “The boys will be thrilled. They love themselves some hot rods. What did you have to bribe them with to get a stock rebuild on Jane’s Toyota?”

  John came back in his ‘best’ Natasha voice. “Is secret, Boris.”

  “And you claim I’m full of it. See you tonight.”

  “Bye.”

  We got to the house and traded vehicles. Snitz smelled Nikki, and whined. I said, “Me too, boy. Me too.”

  I drove to John’s. Couldn’t help thinking how much my life had changed in the last couple of months. Better find a project soon, or I was gonna be depressed again. One day without Nikki, and I was in a world of hurt. Snitz wasn’t sure about giving up shotgun when we got to John’s. He wound up in Tina’s lap. She looked nervous. I said, “Just stroke his head. He likes that.”

  She petted him, cautiously at first, but she got into it when he looked up at her with puppy eyes.

  “These cute little animals guarded your camps at night? He doesn’t seem big enough for that.”

  “As time went on, dogs were selectively bred for different purposes. Guard dogs are still large. His ancestors were bred for herding other animals.”

  “There are dogs that are bred for specific purposes?”

  “There are even tiny dogs, bred specifically to sit in their owners laps and be cute. At one time, they had a purpose, but now they’re just companions.”

  “What purpose could such an animal have?”

  “Before modern hygiene, fleas were a problem for people. Fleas prefer dogs to people.”

  “So the dog sat in the owners lap and collected all their fleas?”

  “It’s a crap job, but it gets you fed.”

  “Tell me some other strange dog jobs.”

  “Lessee, roasting a large piece of meat requires turning it steadily. Rather than have a person stand and turn the bar, called a spit, that held the meat, a breed of dog was developed to run inside a wheel geared to it. They were called Turnspits, and the breed died out after electricity came into common use. Nowadays, no one is even sure what a Turnspit looked like.”

  We arrived, saving me from further duty as the human Google. I decided to walk down to the shop, and see how the boys were coming on the damaged saucer. Mike came with me. He said, “This really is important work you do, Bob. If we had called base, Private Crang might not have survived. They would have towed us back, and we wouldn’t have been able to put her in the ‘doc without pressure.”

  “Just doing what I can, Mike.”

  “Some of us appreciate it, even if the Major doesn’t.”

  “Thanks.”

  We got to the shop. Topper came up to fill me in. “Boss, we’ve got their hull pressure tight. The drive was shredded. We had to take one of the spare saucers off flight status to get a replacement. We also found sabotage, but it was easy to repair.”

  “You did get a video record before you patched it, didn’t you?”

  “Of course, Boss. Good enough that we could match toolmarks if we had to.”

  “You boys run a heck of a shop. Glad I get to be the figurehead.”

  “Come on, Boss. Without you we wouldn’t have the freedom to accomplish half the stuff we do.”

  “None of your previous owners let you utilize your potential like this?”

  Mike spoke up. “Allowing bots this much autonomy is frowned upon by many people in Galactic society.”

  “Whatever for?”

  “They believe bots should be subservient to humans, not partners.”

  “That’s silly. These guys have saved my bacon more times than I can count. Without them, this whole place would fall apart.”

  “You’re one of a kind, Bob.”

  “Topper, how long till she’s ready to fly?”

  “Should be ready in another hour or two. We’re doing the quiet mod and fixing the teaching machine while we’re into it.”

  “Good work. I’m guessing you want to move it up to the barn when you’re finished?”

  “We do need the shop cleared for tomorrow.”

  “Sounds like it’s all under control. Should have known you boys had all the details taken care of. Call if you need anything.”

  Mike and I started back. Mike asked, “What’s happening tomorrow?”

  “John’s secret project. I can’t say anything, and neither should you. It’s for a good cause.”

  “It’s strange the way things work around here, but it always seems to turn out for the best. I’ll be quiet.”

&nbs
p; By the time we got back up the hill, Dee and Dingus were there. I could see John’s Wagoneer in the distance, followed by a station wagon. I figured they had left Shady Oaks together, and Dee had left them behind.

  I hung around to help John carry the beer. I was mistaken. Greg gave me the flying hug and didn’t let go. “How you been, Short Guy?”

  “I feel good, Mr. Wilson. That treatment worked better than any of the other ones. My Grandma says I’m ornery like a little boy should be, now.”

  “That ain’t nothing forty acres and a Border Collie won’t fix.”

  “Is that the kind of dog Snitz is?”

  “Yep. I bet there’s a Frisbee around here somewhere. You wanna play?”

  We played awhile, then people got hungry. We went in and got cleaned up to eat. As we were sitting down, my comm rang. I stepped in the other room to take it. “Boss, we’re done with this saucer. Is it safe to take it to the barn?”

  “We’re all inside eating now. That should be fine, as long as you don’t take too long.”

  “Thanks, Boss.”

  The chili kept folks from talking for a bit. Either I had gotten it too hot, or it was good enough they didn’t want interruptions. Jane looked out the window and said, “That’s odd, I thought I saw a squirrel run out from under my car.”

  Dingus answered, “That reminds me, D-lightful, you haven’t made us any stew since we got back.”

  “You expect me to shoot my own rabbits, Space Ranger?”

  “You have a point there. Guess I need to get off my duff.”

  Greg asked, “You shoot rabbits, Mr. Sloan?”

  Dingus replied, “They’re good to eat, Greg. It’s not any trouble for them to make little rabbits.”

  “Really? How does that work?”

  “Oops. Your Mommy will explain that to you when you get older.”

  Jane said, “Thanks, Dingus. He’s curious enough as it is.”

  “Sorry Ma’am. Been around Bob too much. My mouth runs away with itself.”

  I answered, “Wait a minute, how did this get to be my fault?”

  Max replied, “Bob, everything is your fault. You’re the instigator-in-chief.”

  I looked at John. “A little help here, partner?”

  “I believe Max has hit the nail on the head, there, Bob. What was it you needed help with?”