Redefining Rayne

by Amy Mullen

When they finally found her, she sprung out and tickled them both until they were red in the face from laughing. She picked them both up and presented them to Andre. "They have found me, the little imps!"

  His eyes went to hers, and she beamed with happiness. It was one of the few genuine, joyous smiles he had seen on her face. She struggled to hold both boys up, but she was so happy she was glowing. In that moment, he knew she had won his heart. He would have to find a way to chase away her demons. If he could manage that, he would have the world.

  "Before we go hunting frogs in the bailey, can I have a word with Lady Rayne?"

  The boys struggled to get down and went to Aliza. "May we have a snack before we go?" Hamon said with a bit more energy than usual.

  Andre nodded in response. He wished Jenri would speak. He had always been so shy. Andre could scarcely believe how the boy was coming out of his shell lately, but he still did not utter a word. He had been so young when he arrived, and he had always been a quiet boy, unlike his brother. Hamon was always laughing and usually led his little brother around looking for a new adventure.

  The trio made their way out of the hall to go to the kitchens, and he shifted his attention to Rayne. Her smile faded, but just a bit.

  "I have to admit, those boys have lightened my heart," she said.

  "Aye, they are sweet souls."

  "You wanted to speak with me?"

  "The men who arrived, I thought you should know who they are."

  "They are my cousin's men. I saw through the window."

  "Aye," he said, scratching the back of his neck, wondering how to present the information to her. "There is a problem."

  "Please tell me. You may think women weak and witless, milord, but I wish to know as whatever happens here affects me too."

  "I think neither of those things. Many men respect their wives and their mothers. Your husband must have done a terrible job of showing you how a woman should be treated."

  She looked down at the floor, waiting.

  "As I was saying, there are problems. One big problem, actually. I wish to tell you so you may understand what is going to happen in the following weeks. Come with me to my desk, please."

  She followed. Once they were alone, he offered her a chair. She sat, her eyes never leaving his face, her back rigid.

  Eying her for a reaction, he spoke as quietly as he could. "Odo was here to see where I stand. He is leading a group of local barons who wish to remove Rufus from England. They are loyal to Robert and feel he would better serve as King of England. Many barons are split, with lands in both kingdoms. They are playing to see where the power shall fall, lest they lose everything they have. War, my dear, is a selfish turn for all involved. One crows of loyalty to a country, but it often comes down to protecting one's personal interests, nothing more."

  "Robert? William's brother? The Duke of Normandy?"

  "One and the same. The feeling is Robert should have had all of his father's lands, not just those across the sea. These barons, led by Odo, are planning to take William. 'Tis rumored Robert is going to come soon to catch his brother unaware, battling with Odo and his followers by his side, so the deed may be done."

  "Does William Rufus know?"

  "Aye, that is the funny part. He knows and has had suspicions for a while now. He has known for quite some time something was amiss with his own barons. Odo is holed up in Pevensey Castle, ironically not far from Hastings, where the Conqueror took England years ago. Rufus plans to hold the castle under siege until they starve. Should Robert appear, Rufus will be ready for him."

  "Those men, they came to tell you this?"

  "That, and the king is calling on the fyrd to help him. This means they are calling everyone up, including villagers."

  "And you?" she asked him.

  "I will send my knights, and I have been asked to do some tasks for William Rufus away from the battlefield. I will be rounding up men and sending them out."

  "I see."

  "William Rufus knows I am his man. I promised his father on his deathbed I would be. 'Tis not a secret, though for some reason Odo thought to see if he could sway me. He could not. You will be protected here. I have to set the smith up to make some more weaponry for my men, and then in a week, we ride out. They will go to Pevensey, and I will go to London."

  Her face was unreadable, but something akin to fear crossed her face and quickly disappeared.

  "Andre," she said, lowering her voice to a whisper, "I worry for Tillie's safety."

  "You shouldn't. She is in London by now, I would think. She is with good men. Not only are they good fighters, they have the moral compass needed to escort a woman without bothering her."

  "But I do not understand why she left me. Do you truly think she will return?"

  "She said as much, and I have no reason to believe she was being anything but truthful."

  "And she gave you no clue as to where she was going or why? She did not even tell me she was going, she did not bid me farewell personally, and I feel alone without her."

  "Totally alone, Rayne?"

  She met his gaze and for a moment forgot where she was. "Nay," she finally admitted, "I am glad you are still here."

  "That is a start," he said and then stood. "We may survive this yet."

  "You tease."

  "I only wish you to feel safe here."

  "Fine. Shall we take the boys to the pond then?"

  "Aye," he said, holding out his arm to her. "We shall."

  Chapter Twelve

  As soon as they finished eating after mass the next day, Andre asked Rayne if she would like to ride with him.

  "Milord?" she said, "Are you sure? I do not have a horse."

  "That is easily remedied," he said. "Wear something warm, and come to the stables."

  She obliged after donning the only cloak she had with her. She tied it tightly about her shoulders as she hurried to meet Andre. As unsure as she was about her place in the world, she was excited to ride again.

  When she arrived, Andre came from the stables with a white horse behind him. He handed her the reins but kept a tight grip on the harness, and watched her face intently.

  "She is beautiful," Rayne said, her eyes widening as she gently put her hand out toward the mare.

  "Her name is Dancer, and she is yours," Andre said. "Do you like her?"

  "Aye. She is wonderful, but I cannot accept such a gift. Tis too much."

  "You can, and I insist. You should have your own horse. She is mild tempered but strong and sure. Dancer will serve you well, and I feel she is perfect for you."

  "I do not know what to say," Rayne shrugged as the horse nuzzled her hand.

  "Say 'thank you' and be done with it," Andre said. "My destrier is ready as soon as you are."

  Nodding, Rayne led the horse toward the open bailey and away from Andre as she spoke to the animal in hushed tones. She had not ridden since she arrived at Cuxton, and Claude had rarely allowed her the pleasure.

  Within minutes Andre appeared behind her atop his horse. The mighty war-horse was larger than Dancer, but Dancer appeared at ease.

  "I have never known her to throw a rider. Use care and mount her so we may ride."

  "Many horses need time to get to know a person before they allow it, milord," Rayne said.

  "Dancer will be fine, I assure you. Do you need assistance?"

  "Nay," she said, shaking her head.

  Within minutes they were off. Andre held his horse back so Rayne could keep up. She seemed unsure at first, but by the time they crossed the drawbridge she seemed at ease with her new mount.

  "Where are we going?" she asked, eyeing the men accompanying them. "Are we going far?"

  "Nay, not too far. Just to the village and then perhaps the fields nearby. I thought you might like to see more than just the castle. I made time today for this very reason."

  They rode, enjoying the silence for a few short minutes before the village came into view. Dancer was indeed a gentle ride, but Rayne s
ensed the horse would love to stretch her legs and gallop. Reaching out, she rubbed Dancer's neck.

  As they neared, curious children emerged from the woods near the village. There were no men in sight, but women were busy carrying buckets, feeding animals, and gathering wood. To Rayne's relief, they were greeted with smiles.

  "Milord," a small voice came from behind them. Andre alit from his horse and offered Rayne his hand to help her do the same. "Do you come on business? Can I get you food or drink?"

  "Nay," he said, smiling at the younger girl who blushed under his gaze. "I have brought Lady Rayne to see the village. We will be married soon, and I thought it would be a good idea to introduce her."

  The girl bobbed, blushed again, and ran off. Rayne lifted her eyes to meet Andre's, and a small giggle escaped. No one here feared him. It was yet another sign that her notion all men should be feared was wrong. She sensed no trepidation in those greeting their lord.

  "I shall take you to my dungeon!" a young voice shouted in Norman, spoken with a heavy English accent. Startled, Rayne turned to see a boy of no more than nine or ten years running towards Andre. In his hand was a sword. It was rusted and small, but the sharpened blade glistened in the sunlight.

  Andre swung around and drew his own sword. For a moment, Rayne feared for the life of the brown-haired boy, but the thoughts fizzled as the boy's sword parried Andre's controlled swing.

  The laughter that followed put Rayne's mind at ease. Andre obviously enjoyed sparring with the boy, and the boy knew his lord would not hurt him.

  "I surrender," Andre said, dropping the tip of his sword and kneeling before the boy.

  The young man too dropped the tip of his sword and put one fisted hand on his hip. His chin jutted into the air as his eyes danced with merriment. "How did I do, milord?"

  "You did well, Olin. Have you been practicing as I have instructed?"

  "Aye, milord! I have been working with my sword whenever Father tells me I can."

  "Good man," Andre said as he stood and tapped the boy lightly behind his shoulder. "Lady Rayne," he said, turning his attention toward her. "This is Olin. When he reaches ten years, he will be training with my men at Cuxton. He hopes to be a brave knight in service to the king one day."

  Rayne stepped forward and greeted the boy. "You do well, Olin. I feared for the lord's life when you charged," she said. "You will indeed be a brave fighter one day."

  "Do you also fight with a sword, milady?" the boy asked. "My mum uses one on occasion, when my father must be away."

  "Nay, I have never used a sword," she said. "I fear you would best me in any competition."

  "Olin," Andre said, addressing the boy once again. "Please continue your lessons, and we shall meet again at the end of the summer when you have reached ten. Until then, do your best to help your parents."

  "Yes, milord, I shall," the boy said, bowing to both Andre and Rayne before he scampered away.

  Andre watched the boy run off and then turned to Rayne. "You do not use a sword then?"

  "'Tis not befitting a lady," she replied.

  "Ah, that is nonsense. Lies uttered by a weak man, I presume. Every woman should wield a sword if for nothing more than her own protection. After we wed, I cannot say I will always be around. My duties to the king will take me away. My men will care for you as they should, but it does not hurt for a woman to have some means to protect herself."

  Without waiting for her to respond, he walked toward her and put his sword in her hand. She grasped the heavy weapon, but her arms would not hold it. It fell to the ground with a resounding thud. Rayne struggled to pick it up and finally held it in the air. Her arms shook with the burden.

  With a chuckle, Andre reached around her from behind and secured her hands between his to help her hold the sword in the air. "You see, milady, my sword is heavy, for it must stand up in battle against many different weapons. At times, 'tis all I have to put between myself and certain death. Do not fret. You may find this one to be cumbersome, but I can have one made you can lift more easily."

  Rayne's skin tingled as his breath blew hot over the back of her neck. His arms around her made her feel secure. She released a deep, choppy breath of her own as she marveled at the power in his arms and how easily he held the weapon up in front of her. "Aye, 'tis heavy," she said with a throaty whisper.

  "So, you shall learn," he said as he released his grip, putting the weight of the sword back into her hands. "Don't drop it."

  The sword started to fall, but she stopped it. The muscles in her upper arms quivered. She could clean all day and lift heavy platters, but the gleaming weapon in her hands was hard for her to manage.

  He took the weapon from her and sheathed it. "Shall we continue then?"

  Rayne walked behind him with Dancer. She held tight to the reins, but she already knew the horse would not bolt. He was right. The mare was perfect for her. In just an hour's time she had her own horse and the word of Andre that she would learn to defend herself.

  They walked through the village as Andre introduced her to some of the women they encountered. The men were all out digging up the earth, readying it for planting, so she would have to meet them another time. A kind woman with glittering blue eyes was introduced as a special villager. She was the one who knew about herbs and healing. She had given many lessons to Helga, the cook, and she offered the same to Rayne.

  Once they were done, Andre bid her to mount Dancer so they could ride. Rayne felt a bit false, greeting these folks and even accepting their kindness when she did not know if she would remain at Cuxton. Andre spurred his horse into motion, and Dancer followed. He went slow at first and must have felt Rayne was doing well as he prodded his horse into a gallop, and they went off across a field toward the woods.

  Rayne halted near him as they entered the trees. Andre's men came up behind them. "Stay here," he commanded them as he motioned for Rayne to dismount. He handed the reins of both horses to one of his men and then gestured toward the woods.

  "Come," he said, taking her hand.

  "Where are we going," she said. She hesitated. Going alone into the woods with a man who was not yet her husband did not seem like a wise thing to do, even if that man was as honorable as Andre appeared to be.

  "Worry not. We are only going twenty paces or more. My men will hear you should you need assistance. Fair?"

  "Aye," Rayne said with a nod.

  Andre led her through the trees until they came to a small stream. A boulder sat near the edge, the water flowing freely around it on three sides. "Come," he said as he stepped up on the rock and held out his hands. "'Tis a most peaceful spot, do you not agree?"

  "Do you come here often?" Rayne asked as she accepted his hand and stood on the rock with him.

  "Nay, only once or twice. 'Twas Olin who brought me here. This is where he swims. I brought Jenri and Hamon here once, and they loved the water."

  "Are you really going to let that boy come to Cuxton to train to be a knight?" Rayne asked.

  "Aye, 'tis what he wants, and his parents approve."

  "But…" Rayne said and then stopped.

  "But he is a poor boy?" Andre said, finishing her thought.

  "Aye, I only meant 'tis kind of you to care for his future. Claude would never have thought to help those less fortunate than himself. He was, well, cruel to most."

  "Claude, your late husband," Andre said, his lips momentarily forming a taut line.

  Rayne nodded and then spoke. "He never noticed children unless they brought him food or were needed for a task. He tried to convince me 'twas how 'twas supposed to be, though I never agreed."

  "He was wrong. One day, we shall bring our children here, and they will swim with children like Olin," Andre said squeezing the hand he still held. Rayne tried to pull away, but he held tight.

  "Must you fight me today? We have been having such a pleasant day thus far."

  Rayne bit her lower lip, trying to hide her discomfort, but she allowed her hand to remain.
"I am pleased you will help the boy."

  "Is that a compliment, my dear?" Andre said.

  "Aye, milord. I do not quite understand your kindness towards others, but I do so appreciate it and value it over the pain I saw in those that served at court. 'Tis awful how some believe their wealth, ill-gotten or not, gives them reason to treat those without means as if they were less than a worthy creation of God."

  Andre remained still as her words hung in the air, and then he suggested they return to their horses. Reluctantly, Rayne stepped away from the cozy scene, reminding herself she must not get too close.

  "Shall we ride more, then?" he asked. "There are many more lovely spots like this one I want you to see. I want you to love Cuxton as much as I do."

  "Aye, if we can," she replied as they reached his men and their horses waiting where they had left them.

  "Let us be off then," he said.

  Rayne enjoyed the morning. Andre took her around to a few more spots where he showed enthusiasm for the simple things only nature could create. When they were done and headed home, she knew more about him through what he loved than by what he said. His eagerness to show her everything he held dear was infectious. As they headed back toward the castle, Rayne took in the fresh air and allowed herself to relax.

  As they rode, she watched him, at ease with his horse and the world around them. She was tired of fighting her feelings and had to admit her admiration for him. Rayne had no easy answers and felt a sadness — a sadness for something she had not yet lost and had never known she wanted. What surprised her most was how kind he was to every person he met and how much her heart hurt when she thought of leaving.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The next afternoon Rayne decided to take on her quarters and give them a good cleaning. She sent the help away, telling them she wanted to do it on her own. Armed with a bucket of water and a pile of cloth, she meant to clean away her worries. In the past, when she was most anxious, her house was the cleanest. The tried and true method she had used for years was scrubbing until the answer came, and she was relying on physical labor to help her now.

  Rayne took to scouring the floor after removing the reeds. She would replace them with fresh ones when she was done. At her manor, she would have used lavender as well, but she had none. As she worked, she allowed her mind to wander.