by S S Bazinet
“How can I help?” he asked, hoping to take care of business and leave. “Carol said that you think I have something to do with Peggy’s condition.”
Kevin was the first to speak. “We want to know why she asked for you. It’s as simple as that.”
Arel’s brows narrowed as his brain did a quick query and came up empty. How in the world was he supposed to know the answer to that one? But he could hear the concern in Kevin’s voice and shrugged. “I have no idea.”
Tim was up next. “Well what did she say to you when you saw her this afternoon?”
Arel’s tight brows became deep furrows. He didn’t want to think about the visit or Peggy, but he didn’t have a choice. Carol was counting on him. “She said something about wanting to be my friend. She seemed very tired and in pain.”
“That’s it?” Kevin glared at him with impatience. “That’s all she said?”
“Yes, after I left the room, I stopped at the nurse’s station and told them that she needed assistance.”
Tim leaned across the table. At only two feet away, his expression was intense and probing. “And you have no idea about why she felt it was so important to see you?”
Arel felt Tim’s anxiety from the moment he sat down. Now, the man’s questions were reasonable on the one hand, but he didn’t like being the object of Tim’s interrogation. “Gentlemen, I can assure you that I don’t have a clue.” How could he tell them how he really felt?
Peggy scares the hell out of me! That’s all I know.
He wished he could shout out the words, but he knew that the less he said the better.
Carol had been quiet, but now she spoke up. “I think I know one reason a person would like Arel to visit.”
As if she’d offered them some secret bit of information, all three men shifted their gaze to her.
“Why?” Kevin queried.
“Arel is kind and caring and supportive. He’s very special.” Her tone was passionate and determined.
As soon as Arel heard her explanation, he shook his head.
Please Carol. Don’t help me.
“I’m not special,” he said quietly. “I’m just like everybody else.”
Carol’s eyes flared as she stared at Kevin. “No, Arel, you’re not like everyone! Most people don’t really care if they hurt you. That’s what I’ve learned. They use excuses for being mean to you.”
Kevin scowled back at her. “I said that I was sorry.”
“And that’s enough?” Carol asked. “Do you know how terrible I felt after you called me ‘stupid’ and insinuated that I was thoughtless, and that I had possibly endangered Peggy’s life?”
“I say things without thinking them through,” Kevin countered. “Plus I’m worried as hell about Peggy. Cut me some slack.”
Tim held up his hands. “Calm down, guys, this isn’t going to help anything.”
Carol sat up straighter. “Yes, it is. It’s going to help me. I’m tired of being hurt. I guess that’s why I went online to meet someone. Complete strangers can be much nicer than the people that you know personally. And a shining example of niceness is sitting here at this table. Arel was a real gentleman when Peggy and I met him, a breath of fresh air. His words were carefully chosen. He didn’t blurt out the first inane thing that came to mind.”
Both men turned their attention to Arel. He felt them examining his expensive clothes, the way he’d been taught to hold himself like a gentleman. He’d been raised to inhabit an estate in the English countryside while Kevin and Tim were Sunday afternoon, football candidates. They were totally different, and he knew ‘different’ always seemed to bring out the worst in people.
On the other hand, Carol’s eyes became soft pools of admiration as she continued to expound on his virtues. “Maybe when Peggy met Arel, she recognized something she didn’t see very often. Maybe she saw that he wasn’t like every Tom, Dick, and Kevin that you usually meet.”
Kevin’s jaw tightened as he looked at her and then back at Arel. “Are you saying that he’s better than us?”
Arel’s internal heating system flared, making small beads of sweat appear on his forehead. He tried to connect with Carol, begging with his eyes for her to stop, but she wasn’t paying him any attention. Her glowering gaze was on Kevin.
Carol, please! For the love of god, don’t get these guys worked up.
As he begged mentally, he knew the last thing that he needed was a couple of angry maniacs getting upset with him. He had to do something fast. He pushed his chair back and stood up. “Please, could you stop for a moment? I don’t have any other information that I think would be useful. I believe it’s time for me to leave.”
All three stared at him as soon as he made the announcement.
Carol was the first to protest. “I was just trying to let you know that I appreciate you.”
“Yes, thank you for that acknowledgement. I’m pleased that you feel that way,” he said, trying to control the lump forming in his throat. “But I have to go.”
Kevin stood up too, his face contorted with confusion and anger. “Just like that? My sister is up there in a hospital room moaning and crying and yelling out your name and you don’t care?”
“Don’t yell at him!” Carol shouted back.
“It’s alright. I’m fine,” Arel said, trying to reassure her. His eyes went to Kevin next. “I wish I could be more helpful.”
“You can,” Tim said, joining the conversation.
Arel stared at him and sighed. “How? What more can I do?”
“Let’s all of us go upstairs right now to see Peggy. She was awake when we came down. We told her that we were going for coffee. Let’s go back and see what she says when she sees you.”
Arel hated conflicts. He hated hearing Kevin and Carol fight. He hated being in a hospital. But most of all, he hated the idea of seeing Peggy again. There was no way he could face her after all he’d been through that day. “Can’t this wait?” he asked as a deep down exhaustion took hold.
Kevin looked at him and turned to Carol. “Oh, he’s a charmer alright, a wonderful human being. He’s so wonderful that he can’t take the time to see Peggy for five minutes!”
“I didn’t mean it that way,” Arel protested.
“Then let’s go,” Kevin demanded.
“No!” Arel said in a firm voice. “I’m leaving.” He’d been pushed too far. He’d had all that he could take.
I don’t give a damn anymore! I’m getting the hell out of here. If you have a problem with that, fine. I was ready to die in an Illinois cornfield, and I’m ready to die here, you bastards.
He stared at the men defiantly, his golden eyes filled with bitterness as he backed away from the table. As he made an attempt to escape, Kevin’s stare went wide. The big man tried to grab hold of Arel’s arm. He didn’t succeed, but his movement caused Arel to counter with equal swiftness, leaping backwards. What Arel didn’t realize was that Kevin wasn’t being hostile. He was trying to help. There was a chair pulled out from the table behind them. It was directly in Arel’s path of backward retreat.
“Dammit!” Arel shrieked as he lost all control. Toppling over the chair, he caused it to flip. He hit the floor just before the back of the chair hit his face. The blow was enough to make him extend his list of obscenities as he fought the indignity and the pain at the same time.
Kevin, Tim, and Carol gathered around him at once, all trying to remove the chair and check for damages. But Arel was in full out fighting mode, trying to push them away.
“Leave me alone!” he gasped as he tried to touch his nose. Generous amounts of blood were pouring from the injured body part.
Despite Arel’s protests, Kevin and Tim were determined to help. Each of them took an arm and lifted him to his feet as gingerly as they would lift a stricken puppy. Carol crooned out, “Poor baby!”
As Arel tilted his head back and searched his pocket for a handkerchief, he saw Michael, beautiful and bright in misty angel garb for a change, looking
down at him from above. Michael was smiling and telling Arel something.
They’re friends. Let yourself remember that you knew them long ago.
“Friends?” Staring at Michael’s radiant eyes, something shifted in Arel’s perception. The room faded. The world as he knew it slipped away.
* * * * *
The clouds lay low and heavy, like black, mourning clothes over the ancient battlefield that Arel saw around him. But he wasn’t the Arel that he knew. He was a warrior and part of the disarray. When he tried to take a breath, the air was heavy with the smell of blood and sweat of those who had fought. As dusk claimed the distant hills, the injured and the dead alike lay scattered on the field. The groans of those who were still fighting for life filled the air like a dirge of misery.
Arel, as a seasoned soldier, knew his battle was over. Fresh blood flowed from his chest and his vision was failing. He did have the comfort of his friends to console him. One of them cradled his head, telling him to hold on. This man was young, blond and battled hardened, but his voice was weak with emotion. A second man pressed down on Arel’s chest, trying to staunch the bleeding, but his cheerless, despairing eyes told the real story.
Arel reached out to them one last time, his comrades, his brothers, but their faces faded from his sight and his hand fell heavily to the ground.
The entire episode came and went very quickly. Arel was still being settled into a chair by Kevin and Tim when the battle scene took on the quality of a dream. But it left a profound feeling of longing in him. The bond of comradeship was paramount in the life he’d glimpsed. He missed it now as Kevin and Tim tried their best to help him. He only had a bloody nose, but they seemed to care that he was hurt. Their former mistrust was replaced by frowns of concern as they checked out his injuries. In turn, he surrendered to their ministrations, still caught up in the vision he’d had.
“Doesn’t look too bad,” Tim offered.
“No, I don’t think it’s broken,” Kevin agreed as he gently took Arel’s nose in hand and felt for problems. “Trust me, my nose has taken a beating so many times over the years, I’m kind of an expert.”
Arel didn’t know how to respond, so he simply sat in the chair, holding a silk handkerchief to his face. The cloth was quickly filled to capacity and blood dripped down, forming a large red spot on his crisp shirt. When the flow finally slowed down, he stood up. “I’m fine, and I know that I’m a mess, but if you want me to go up to see Peggy, let’s go.”
Tim shook his head and laughed. “I don’t think so. Peggy would think we tried to kill you if she saw all that blood. Come back tomorrow.”
Carol handed him napkins to take with him. “What about one o’clock?” she asked timidly.
When Arel nodded in agreement, Kevin reached out and took Arel’s free hand and gave it another crushing shake. “Thanks for coming. Take care of yourself.”
As Arel started on his way out of the cafeteria, he heard Tim’s voice and his remark.
“Carol is right. He is a nice guy.”
Thirty-Six
THE NIGHT WAS cool and clear, and a half moon hung in the dark skies. Arel lay back on a thick cushioned, lounge chair in the garden. He glanced over at Michael who sat in an identical lounger. “I sound funny when I talk,” he said with a nasal twang.
“Yes, but hopefully the condition will be better soon. Besides, you have your English accent going for you. Peggy seems taken with it.”
“I forgot that she said that. I don’t think she’s right, is she? I don’t want to sound different.”
“She thinks that it makes you sound very charming.”
“I guess.” Arel touched his nose, drawn to the prospect of exploring just how sore it was. “Wow, it really hurts.”
“I think you should leave it alone. Your body doesn’t need more pain.”
“How do I look? Has the swelling gone down any?” The last time Arel had checked a mirror, he’d noted that he had two black eyes and a nose that was clearly too big for his face.
Michael crossed his arms, but seemed to be stifling a chuckle. “It’s—” He looked upwards, as if the night sky held the description he was looking for and let him down. “It’s still swollen.”
Arel slumped down deeper into the lounger. “I hope it’s better by tomorrow. I can’t believe I’m going to the hospital again, but the memory of the battlefield has helped somehow. I hardly remember it now, but the feeling is still there, especially the part where I died. It was so easy.” He glanced over at Michael. “Why didn’t you tell me how easy it is to leave this world?”
“I’m trying to help you to live, not die.”
“Yes, but it was such a peaceful feeling.” Arel stared wistfully heavenward, at the vast, velvet darkness above. “In my vision, simply saying goodbye to life was so simple. Something inside of you slips away, simply leaves this life behind. The next thing you know, you’re gone.”
He shut his eyes and smiled, taking in the fresh air in gentle gasps. “Yes, it’s so easy, nothing to it. I know how angels must feel . . . to be above it all . . . to be swept away.” As he spoke he imagined himself slipping away now, rising upwards into the night sky. “That’s what I want . . . to be in the heavens . . . to join the stars.”
Arel’s body seemed to be listening, seemed to know what he wanted. He felt his heart flutter erratically, like a frantic, caged sparrow wanting the skies again. “No more pain, no more worries or fear, that’s what I want.” As he contemplated his dream and intended a vacation from life, his vision blurred and a loud, cracking sound followed. Something inside of him did break loose, and he began to soar upwards.
* * * * *
Michael’s eyes flew open when he felt the shift, when he felt Arel projecting his energy outward, expanding it into the ethers. “Arel, what are you doing?” Leaping out of his chair, rushing over to Arel’s lounger, he put his hand on Arel’s heart. “No, no,” he repeated sternly. “It’s not time for you to leave this world.” He kept his hand in place, letting his energy rouse the languid vessel beneath, reminding it that it was forgetting about its duty. At the same time, he gazed upwards.
“You’re just finding your friends,” he said soothingly, directing his words to Arel’s life force, coaxing it to come back into the body. It wasn’t an easy sell. Calling back a runaway soul could be tricky. But this one hadn’t gone too far . . . yet.
“It won’t make it any easier in the long run. You have to face yourself, dear friend. You’ll have to come back again. Don’t prolong the misery.”
* * * * *
Diving. Diving. Diving. Crash! When Arel opened his eyes, he was grabbing for something, for anything. He thought he’d fallen off of the chair, but he was still lying in the lounger. Had he fallen asleep? He remembered holding his chest, feeling his heart doing funny things. Now, as he clasped it again, it seemed to be better.
Steady she goes, captain.
Why was he thinking about Star Trek and voyages into deep space? And why was Michael hovering over him. “What happened?”
Michael stepped back quickly, letting a smile slide into place. “I thought I better wake you up. It’s getting a bit chilly out here. You might sleep better in your bed.”
The tall, confidant angel was usually as calm as dry toast. Now, his manner was almost edgy.
“What’s going on with you?” Arel asked. “Am I missing something? You look like you saw a ghost.”
“I’m just happy that you’re here, enjoying this wonderful world.”
“Where else would I be?” Arel stretched out his body, thinking that Michael was right. His bed would be more comfortable. Finally, he stood up. “I must have been dreaming. I thought I could fly. It was nice. What do you think? Should God have given human beings wings?”
“I think you already have everything you need.”
Arel paused and scanned Michael’s face. “I still think you look kind of strange.”
“I’m fine. Now go to bed and get some rest, please.�
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As he walked to the door, Arel paused and looked up. “I don’t care what you say, someday I want to fly.”
* * * * *
After Michael closed the door to his room, he let out a sigh of relief. Arel was safely tucked away in his bed downstairs. Still, Arel’s idea about people having wings made Michael reflect on the evening’s turn of events.
You don’t need wings to fly away, Arel. You almost exited the world with your willpower alone.
After successfully coaxing Arel’s soul back into his body, Michael had to use more of his energy to conceal Arel’s newest trick from his conscious mind. He hoped it would be enough to keep Arel earthbound.
I don’t know if I’ll get you back if you try that escape route again.
A person only died when it was their time, when the soul decided it was right. However, in Arel’s case, the rules were changing. His will and his soul were being very quirky, exploring options that were worrisome. If the man left his body for a bit too long, his heart wouldn’t make it. Every time that he decided to explore the ethers in so daring a manner, he was putting himself at risk. And knowing Arel, he might use his new found power to leave for good if he knew he had that option.
Thirty-Seven
PEGGY STARED AT the two empty chairs across from her bed. She’d convinced Tim and Kevin to go home and get some sleep. Now, if she was going to be ready for Arel’s return visit the next day, she needed to be rested too. She closed her eyes and tried to relax. She had to be careful not to make any quick movement that might set off the pain in her neck and back. The meds were helping, but she had to quiet her mind if she was going to sleep soundly.