“That’s generous, but I’m not sure I deserve it.”
“He needs you,” Robyn said. “The tremors. Headaches. Throwing up. He tries to hide the symptoms, but he still suffers. The road to recovery will be long.”
Tasia found it hard to believe she’d had that much effect on him. It was hard enough to believe he was choosing her over Ashley.
“So?” Robyn said. “Want to see your hiding place?”
Tasia trusted Xan, and eavesdropping was wrong and immoral and immature. Something a silly child would do. Not to mention that Tender Morris would have her doing penance for a month if he found out.
And imagine the embarrassment if she got caught. She shivered.
No, she wouldn’t do it.
Her mouth, apparently, had other ideas. “Show me.”
* * *
Ashley furiously worked her needlepoint.
Xan saw her waiting, yet he continued talking to peasants for hours.
Fine. If that was the way he wanted it, she wouldn’t let it get to her. She added thorns to the rose adorning the fabric. Big, sharp thorns. Tipped with blood.
She’d almost finished the final stitch of the border by the time the last of the peons filed out, leaving her alone with him except for his guards and attendants. He didn’t even bother to look at her, either, sitting on his throne perusing a document an aide had thrust into his hand.
Ashley smirked. No man ignored her for long.
“I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you helping my father,” Ashley said. “I haven’t had a chance to thank you properly.”
Her gaze traced the armor tightly binding his muscular arms and chest. He’d changed since the battle of Asherton. She’d enjoy the “thanking” as much as he did.
“I’ve neither helped nor agreed to help,” Xan said.
“Yet.”
“I hope you’re right,” he said, still not looking at her. “An alliance with the queen is in all our best interests, but it’s no sure thing.”
“It will work itself out.”
He met her eyes, his face hard. Determined. “What do you want, Ashley?”
“To catch up with an old friend. If you still consider me so …”
“Of course, I do!”
Friendship was such an obvious vulnerability for him. She’d need to break him of it after they married. For the moment, though, exploiting it was far too useful.
She lowered her voice and added a touch of begging to her tone. “I just thought you could, maybe, tell me more about those twenty nights we dreamed to each other in the meadow. I’d so like to remember it.”
His expression softened. Perfect. She’d counted on her plea reminding him of falling in love with her.
“I’d … like that, too,” he said. “Why don’t we all have dinner together? You, me, Lainey, Brant, Dylan … Tasia.”
“Oh.” Ashley jutted a corner of her mouth to the side, pretending to consider. “It’s getting late, and we’ll be leaving early tomorrow. I was hoping to go to bed soon. Maybe you could come by my quarters when you’re finished here?”
She stifled a grin. He’d find her changed into something comfortable—comfortable and mostly nonexistent. No man would be able to resist her like that.
Xan hesitated before speaking. “I’m sorry, but that’s just not a good idea.”
“Whyever not? It’s perfectly harmless.”
“Because … just because.”
He was rejecting her? Again? What the blast?
After a deep breath to still her rising anger, she feigned a sob and let her eyes cloud with moisture. “I … I understand. You don’t care about me anymore. That talk about you loving me was just … just like all the other men who want my body but couldn’t care less about me.”
“That’s not fair.”
“What happened to us? We were engaged. Now, you don’t even have a few spare minutes out of your day to talk.”
“You broke off our engagement and had me arrested!”
“It was a disagreement!” She took another deep breath. “Couples argue all the time without breaking up. If you truly cared about me—”
“That girl I met in the meadow will always be my friend but only my friend.”
“This is because of Tasia, isn’t it?” Ashley said. “You’ll come around. She’s nothing compared to me.”
“Frankly, you’re nothing compared to her.”
Her eyes teared with no deception required.
He grimaced. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
“What do you see in her? What does she have that I don’t?”
Xan sighed. “Compassion, for one thing. She’d show more kindness to the lowliest slave than you would to your best friend.”
“You said that you saw my essence, that you know me to be a good person.”
“I did, and I do,” he said.
“Then give me another chance!”
“Ashley …”
“Anything you want—everything you want—you can have. Back in Asherton, your greatest desire was that I love you.” She paused, her heart thudding. “Done.”
“Ashley …”
“Don’t like the way I look? I’ll change. I can be anything you desire.” She used her magic to make her legs appear longer and her bust larger.
“That’s not—”
“I can do more than that. Not just anything, anyone.” Ashley spun from him and stared at her reflection on one of his guard’s shields.
She grimaced. How far was she willing to go?
Narrowing her eyes, she decided. Whatever it took.
She called her magic and turned back around.
85.
Tasia clutched the supports surrounding the peephole and pressed her eyes closer.
In the throne room below, Ashley invited Xan back to her quarters.
Tasia’s muscles went rigid. Though she tried hard to trust him, doubt twisted her stomach into knots. What man could resist such temptation?
He hesitated, and her heart leapt to her throat.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “but that’s just not a good idea.”
Ashley cajoled him, yet still he refused. Tasia relaxed. Some.
“I … I understand,” Ashley said. “You don’t care about me anymore. That talk about you loving me was just … just like all the other men who want my body but couldn’t care less about me.”
Good Grief. Fake sobs and tears? Really? Tasia’s breath caught, though. Xan wasn’t experienced at sussing out lies, especially not Ashley’s.
“That’s not fair,” he said.
“What happened to us? We were engaged. Now, you don’t even have a few spare minutes out of your day to talk.”
“You broke off our engagement and had me arrested!”
He wasn’t falling for it. Good.
Of course, he never should have been put in that position in the first place. Confronting Ashley wasn’t his job.
Tasia hung her head. She’d avoided her responsibility long enough. Instead of sitting on her hands and eavesdropping like an insolent child, she should get down there.
As she exited the ceiling pocket, the voices from the throne room faded until she could no longer make out what was being said. Drat! She hesitated, worried they might discuss something she needed to hear?
If only she were a harken instead of a life mage.
Tasia grimaced. Healing people was the most useful and honorable use of magic she could imagine, and she was wishing for a different ability just so she could continue eavesdropping? She needed to get a grip on her priorities.
Determined, she rushed off to find Robyn, but by the time they opened a door leading to the dais, several minutes had passed.
“Anything you want—everything you want—you can have,” Ashley said. “Back in Asherton, your greatest desire was that I love you.… Done.”
Neither she nor Xan seemed to have noticed that Tasia and Robyn had entered.
“Ashley …” he sa
id.
“Don’t like the way I look? I’ll change. I can be anything you desire.”
Tasia winced. She never thought she’d see Ashley beg a man to take her. Her legs appeared to grow, and her chest bulged against her dress.
Xan grimaced. “That’s not—”
“I can do more than that. Not just anything, anyone.” Ashley spun away from him, still not noticing Tasia and Robyn. An instant later, she transformed.
To look like Tasia.
Ashley faced Xan, and for a moment, everyone stood there, stunned. His jaw literally dropped. She opened her mouth.
“No!” Tasia shouted. “You’ve said and done more than enough.”
Ashley looked at her with wide eyes.
“I get it,” Tasia said. “No matter who you are, rejection hurts, but this is too much. Making yourself look like me is not okay. Ever.”
Ashley glared, clearly expecting Tasia to back down, but she held the gaze, unyielding, anger matching anger and then some.
“Fine.” Ashley dropped the façade, the closest thing to an apology Tasia expected from her. “It was silly to think any man would choose your looks over mine, anyway.”
She spun and stalked toward the room’s front exit but, just before reaching it, stopped and turned to meet Tasia’s eyes. “You think you’ve won, don’t you?”
“This wasn’t a game. There is no winner.”
“Of course there is!”
People who thought everything in life was a competition, especially those so driven to always come out on top, were destined for misery.
“I’m sorry you feel that way,” Tasia said.
“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you? Finally finding a man blind enough to pick you over me.”
“Believe me,” Tasia said, “causing you pain does not make me happy.”
Ashley laughed, high-pitched yaps bordering on hysteria. “Worry about yourself, not me. This is not over.”
“But it is over. He chose me.”
“For now.” Ashley turned to leave, laughter trailing behind her. “Only for now.”
* * *
Xan’s swiveled his eyes to Tasia.
“You okay?” he said.
“I … I don’t know.” She clasped her shaky hands against her dress. “I’m not even sure what I should be feeling right now.”
“Definitely sad that your cousin is hurt,” Xan said. “Probably mad about what she did, and maybe … just a little bit … glad we can finally be together?”
The tiniest hint of a grin lightened Tasia’s face. “I suppose that about sums it up.” She let out a big sigh. “At least that’s over.”
“No joke. I was holding my own with her, but it’s probably a good thing you happened to enter when you did.”
She scrunched her nose, making her look even more adorable than normal. “Yeah. I, uh … about that …”
“Just so you know …” He grinned and eyed the hole in the ceiling where she’d watched. “I wouldn’t have changed a word even if I hadn’t known you were listening.”
Her face reddened. “You knew?” She shot Robyn an accusing glare.
“Wizard, remember?” Xan said. “Sound. Heat. Life sense. Hard to hide from me in my own castle.”
“I’m so sorry,” Tasia said. “I knew it wasn’t right, but …”
“It’s okay.”
“No, eavesdropping was childish and stupid, and I know better. And I’m sorry you had to face Ashley. If I would have gone to her three days ago like I should have …”
She spoke in starts and stops, obviously agonized by her actions, and while she talked, he walked to her. When she finished, he pulled her to him.
“Tasia, I understand, and it’s okay. She’s … special to me, too. It was good that the news came from both of us.”
She stared at the closed door. “I should go after her, try to set things right.”
“Not now,” Robyn said. “Lady Ashley’s anger is too hot. Best to wait.”
“I don’t know….” Tasia said. “Tender Morris always says, ‘Put off not an important job for your ambition time will rob.’ ”
Xan winced.
“See?” Tasia said. “You think I should go to her.”
“That would accomplish nothing other than making her even madder at you,” Xan said.
“Then why did you react like that?”
“Because your tender’s little saying struck way too close to home.”
“Hosea?” Tasia said.
“Yes, and I’m running out of time.”
“Go,” Tasia said. “Do it now.”
“But … we’ve been apart for three days and we can finally …”
Tasia cocked her head to the side.
“Fine,” Xan said. “You’re right.”
A short flight later, he landed outside Hosea’s house. Everything was quiet within, subdued, even though Ramon and Dea were still awake. The silence marked a sharp contrast to the boisterous playing and yelling that permeated the home when Marco had been alive.
Yet another consequence to be laid at Xan’s feet.
His breath caught. He’d caused Marco’s death. How could he ever face Hosea again?
Xan turned, ready to take to the air once more, but stopped before leaving the ground. Someone had to run Eye Lake while he was away, and there was no one he trusted besides Hosea. And as much as Xan would prefer to delegate the task, it was his responsibility to see that his people were cared for in his absence.
His hand trembled as he knocked on the door.
An old man answered. Stooped. Hollow eyes. Little life remaining.
Hosea.
He’d aged years in the six weeks since Xan had last seen him.
“Hi.” Xan hunched his shoulders at the incredible inadequacy of his greeting.
“Lord Gryphon.”
“I’m … uh, going away for a while. All the mages are.”
No response. Hosea just stared at him.
Xan cleared his throat. “I was wondering if you could … take care of everyone here while I’m gone?”
“You going to battle, lord Gryphon? Going to get more people killed?”
The words beat at Xan worse than all the fists and arrows he’d ever suffered. When he finally spoke, his voice came out small. Weak. “Yes.”
“More fathers losing their sons.” Hosea spat. “I reckon someone has to look after the ones left behind.”
“You’ll do it, then?”
“Go, lord Gryphon. Just go.”
“Thank you.”
Hosea moved to close the door but hesitated. Xan waited, his heart pounding at what might be said next.
“One boon for me, lord Gryphon?”
“Anything I can deliver is yours. Anything.”
Hosea coughed, a wheezing, sickly, feeble sound. “Make better decisions this time.” He slammed the door.
86.
Xan flew back to the camp from a flyspeck village.
Searching settlements with less than a hundred people was almost pointless, and that one had no more than fifty. And of course, no luck.
After being at Aingfief for two days already, they’d exhausted the nearby settlements, and with the queen’s caravan close to arriving, he couldn’t afford to stray far. Better to waste his time on a tiny chance of finding a mage than have none, right?
Though how one more—or even a dozen more—would help, he had no idea. Dastanar’s forces were so overwhelming.
He shook his head to banish the negative thoughts. Victory had to be possible. All he had to do was find a plan that would save them, that ever elusive masterstroke of genius that would somehow bring a superior foe to its knees.
No problem.
When he neared his tent, he spotted the one thing guaranteed to raise his spirits—Tasia. She was turning from one of his guards, probably checking to see if he was back yet. As she stepped away, he landed gently behind her and tapped her shoulder.
She spun. “Xan? Where did you …”<
br />
“Come with me.” He grabbed her arm and dragged her into his tent. When they were out of sight of prying eyes, he pulled her close. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too. How did—”
He kissed her, muffling whatever she’d been about to say, and after a moment, all thoughts save the need to get her to his cot were driven from his mind. His hands wrapped around her waist, and he lifted her.
She struggled against his grip, though not very hard. “What are you doing?”
“This.” His long legs required only a couple of steps to reach the mattress, and he laid her on it. “Exactly where I want you.”
“What happened to, ‘Let’s take it slow and get to know one another?’ ”
“It was overwhelmed by, ‘I really, really need to lose myself in your kisses.’ ” He sank to his knees and bent to bring his mouth toward hers.
As their lips made contact, his hands caressed her body. Her warm, soft, inviting body. Through her dress and over areas not strictly frowned upon had they been in polite company. He wanted more, though. No dress. Impolite areas.
But he couldn’t. Not until things were official. His hands clenched the cot’s frame.
Their kiss grew more frantic. His iron grip tightened, a poor substitute. She pushed against his chest.
Gentle. Not enough to move him back but enough to let her desire be known. Her mind’s desire, anyway.
Slowly, reluctantly, lingeringly, he pulled away.
“I think …” Tasia cleared her throat. “It might be … uh, prudent to take a break for a moment.”
He grinned. “If you insist.”
“What’s got into you?”
“What do I want to get into is a better question.”
“Alexander Conley, watch yourself!”
He winced. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t look it.”
“I know. It’s just …”
She sat up and straightened her dress. “What?”
“I’d rather keep things light and fun.”
“We’ve had enough fun for one day.”
He sat next to her. His shoulder muscles knotted. “Will either of us even be alive in a week? Everyone is counting on me to devise a brilliant plan, but I’ve got nothing. At least this way, I won’t have any regrets when I die.”
Gryphon (Rise of the Mages Book 2) Page 46