Rain Must Fall

by Deb Rotuno

“An hour…two at most, ’kay?” Brody countered, shaking his head. “We’ll be back before dark. I don’t want to lose anything in those traps, and I’m hoping to find ammo in some of these old hunting cabins. What we really need to do is head down to Klamath Lake, but we don’t have the numbers for that. This, I trust, you guys can handle.”

  His sarcasm was sharp, but he had a point. We needed ammo, and we couldn’t afford to lose any future meals.

  “Just…go, Brody.” I sighed, waving him away, and looked to Martin. “Be careful.”

  “Will do, Sara,” he agreed, and then he turned to follow Brody around the lake.

  They stopped to speak to Derek, whose face was not happy about the new turn of events, but he nodded before shaking his head and going back to Janie and Freddie.

  “My apologies, Sara, for my son,” Leo said softly.

  I tsked, rolling my eyes. “You should stop doing that, Leo. It feels like you’ve been apologizing for him his whole life. He’s said it too, though now I’m not sure he meant it. He’s hated me a long time.”

  Leo laughed. “Hated you? Oh, no, sweet girl. He doesn’t hate you. He’s been kicking himself for well over ten years. He’s pissed off at himself.”

  Grimacing, I shook my head, though it was amusing to see everyone interested in where this conversation was going. “We’d have been miserable, Leo. Brody had problems being faithful.”

  “No, he had problems staying sober.”

  “Bullshit!” I snapped, glaring his way. “I’ve been drunk, Leo. I’ve been damn drunk while my husband was overseas, and not one time did cheating enter my mind. So don’t blame the alcohol; blame the man. Blame the man who laughed when I caught him with Jessica Parham in the office of the garage, the one who practically stalked me at Shelly’s Bar. He sent his friends in to watch me. And the only reason I met Jack was because your son showed up fall-down drunk when his buddies called him. They’d told him I was hitting on a guy at the bar. Which I was,” I said with a grin to Tina. “Jack was too much to resist. Brody showed up, acting like an ass, and Jack put him on the floor.”

  Tina laughed, putting her hands together. “Dear Lord,” she prayed dramatically, looking up to the sky above. “Please, please let me see that event unfold again someday.”

  In her own way, Tina was also praying for Jack’s safe return, but damn, she was funny. She’d quickly become one of the best friends I’d ever had. She was smart, calm, but knew how to lighten things up, and while she’d told me her marriage to Jerry wasn’t perfect, she was one hell of a mom.

  I turned back to Leo, my amusement fading. “You’re my dad’s friend, and I love and respect that, but your son is a different story. He does and says whatever he wants, no matter who it hurts. Alcohol or not, he has no one to blame but himself for the way his life turned out. Even now, with all this shit going on.”

  At the mention of my dad, an ancient sadness, laced with worry, etched over Leo’s face. It was an unspoken thing between us. My dad had promised us he’d follow us to Clear Lake, but the longer time went on, the more we were convinced he wasn’t coming, and that only made my worry for Jack spark into a raging inferno. To speak of “what if” was too hard for any one of us when it came to family we had left out there in the world.

  I locked eyes with Leo, who merely said, “Your dad’s tough.”

  Nodding, I said nothing and went back to work. Once the fish were cleaned, breaded, and ready to fry, I cleaned my hands off in the lake on the way over to see Derek and the kids. I grinned at my son when he immediately started to ramble.

  “Mom! Did’joo see? I took out three bottles and a can!” he gushed, rushing to me, and Derek snatched the rifle out of his hands on the way by.

  “I saw, buddy,” I said, cupping his face until it squished. I kissed his forehead and then pooched lips, finally letting go. “You are a sharpshooter there, partner.” Smirking, I tilted my head at him. “Smile, Freddie.” When he did, I chuckled. “Well, looky there. Is that…a loose tooth?”

  He nodded, wiggling it with his tongue. “Yuth,” he said, his tongue causing him to lisp.

  My heart ached at the steps my son was taking without Jack here to see it. He’d already lost the front top and bottom teeth, which Jack had seen, but now more were loose. He was growing by leaps and bounds every day, and he was changing and learning and doing things I wanted to share with his father. And it was killing me.

  “Oh, ho!” Derek sang, coming to stand with me. “Looks like the Tooth Fairy will be visiting soon.” I could tell as soon as he said it, he regretted it. Not only was money a long-lost thing, but the Tooth Fairy would’ve been Jack and me, and that wasn’t possible either.

  “I bet the Tooth Fairy’s a zombie,” Janie muttered, frowning down at her hands. “And Santa too.”

  I met Derek’s gaze, and he mouthed, Sorry.

  Shaking my head, I let out a deep breath. “Oh, guys…Hey, I know a secret. I know that Santa and the Tooth Fairy are protected by magic, so they’re safe. Don’t you worry.”

  The kids looked at me like they didn’t quite believe me but as if they really wanted to. I was just about to tell them they needed to get cleaned up for dinner, but movement caught my eye just behind Derek.

  Glancing up, my heart stopped, but I pulled out my gun. “Derek,” I whispered, jerking my chin.

  He reacted instantly, pushing Janie and Freddie toward me and rushing to the fence post, where his compound bow stood propped up. A dozen or so infected stepped from the edge of the trees, and Derek ran back to us. He handed the kids the rifles they’d been using.

  “Get them to Rich’s cabin. Now, Sara!” he ordered, pushing us until we started to run.

  As we made our way around the side of the small lake, with the pack of dead following us, screams and gunshots rang out by the cabins.

  The pack was enormous, and it was coming in from the north and east sides of the lake clearing, which meant they were migrating in from Portland and most likely OR-26. I saw several stumble around from behind all the cabins, weaving their way toward Leo, Carol, Josh, and Tina. Josh was already firing away, doing his best to keep the circle from closing in on them. Leo had his shotgun, trying to move his wheelchair at the same time. If someone didn’t help him, he’d be a sitting duck.

  “We’re leading more their way,” I told Derek, panting in fear and exertion.

  “We don’t have a choice. Move,” he said, finally spinning to check behind us. He aimed his compound bow and released an arrow. I didn’t need to look to know he’d hit his target. He then opted for the handgun strapped to his thigh. “Sara, get them in that cabin and down below. You can aim through the windows once they’re safe. And take Leo with you!”

  I left Derek as he stopped to take a stand on the group on our tail, urging the kids up the embankment toward the table where we’d all been sitting. Josh was standing on top of the table; he dropped his rifle and began using a pistol. Two of the infected reached for the kids, and I pointed, aimed, and took them both out, not bothering to slow down.

  Rich’s cabin was between mine and Derek’s, with mine being on the end. Carol was struggling with Leo’s chair, the grass hindering her. He was aiming all around them, telling her to leave him, but she wouldn’t. The wheel lodged in a muddy hole, almost launching Carol over Leo, and he spilled out of the chair. Four dead bastards moved in on them, and no amount of yelling or running would get me there quickly enough, though I aimed and fired anyway. I nailed two of them, one in the head and the other in the neck, which barely slowed it down. The other two fell on Leo and Carol.

  The sound of snarls, ripping flesh, and screams from Carol and Leo sent chills up my spine. I couldn’t stop to help them, and I knew the second they were bitten that they were done.

  “Josh! Tina!” I called, finally reaching the steps of Rich’s cabin. Wrapping my arms around both kids, I lifted them to the porch. “You two, inside. Now!” I yelled, glancing back for Derek, but he seemed to be holding his own as h
e fought the small pack around him.

  Josh grabbed Tina’s arm once he’d cleared a path to the cabin, pulling her with him, but his weapons were empty. She ran toward us and used a long knife to avoid a few, though her eyes widened when she looked my way.

  Both kids screamed, a sound I’d never wanted to hear, and even less did I ever want to see my son raise a weapon, but he did. The damn thing had scrambled up the left side of the porch, pushing and crawling our way, and Freddie’s hands shook, but he pulled the trigger, catching what used to be a woman in the jaw. It didn’t stop her, but it damn well slowed her down. He chambered another round before I could aim at her myself, and then he pulled the trigger again. The woman’s head split wide open at the temple, and she collapsed to the wooden porch floor.

  Freddie froze, eyes wide and breathing heavy.

  “Go, baby. Inside and down below. Take Janie. Go!” I reached for the door and slammed it open, then pushed both kids inside the cabin, only to pull the door closed again.

  Tina and I rounded to face the camp. Derek was pulling arrows from the dead, using the butt of his compound bow to smash skulls. Josh was struggling with a few down by the fire and table, using a large hunting knife. Millie was using a rifle off my dad’s porch. I leaped off the porch, killing one that was reaching for Josh from behind. I also took out the bastard that was feasting on Carol and the three working on Leo.

  Derek finally rushed to us, reloading his compound bow. “I swear to God, Sara. What part of get inside didn’t you understand?” he snapped, glaring my way before lodging an arrow at an infected ten feet away.

  “The kids are safe…but Leo, Carol…” I rasped.

  Derek’s face was pained, but he nodded. “There’re maybe ten left,” he panted, and he was covered in blood and chaos.

  The remaining infected were quickly taken care of, and I gave the camp one more long gaze before falling to my knees, my head falling forward.

  “Sara,” Tina called, and I jumped when she placed a hand on my back. “Sweetie, you gotta move away from them. Now.”

  Confusion must have been written all over my face when I looked up at her, but her eyes were on the ground. My stomach roiled at the sight in front of me. Carol’s hands were twitching, her eyes fluttering. Leo was already on the move, his growl such a sharp contrast to the sweet man he’d once been that a sob ripped from me. His inability to walk followed him over, so he could only drag himself along the grass and through the mud.

  Carol rolled over and had started to sit up when an arrow slammed into her temple. It had come from behind Tina and me, but I could only watch Leo. He’d been a man I’d known and loved my whole life, it seemed. He’d taken my side against his son more times than I could count.

  My hands shook as I raised my weapon and aimed. Leo snarled, snapped, and continued to crawl my way.

  “Sara…”

  I heard Tina’s voice somewhere behind me, and Derek’s joined her, but I knew Leo would hate what he’d become. With a wet sob, I pulled the trigger.

  “No!” I heard behind me, knowing Brody’s voice anywhere, and just the sound of it sent me over the edge.

  I stood up from the muddy ground, my eyes on him as he and Martin rushed to us. I couldn’t focus on Martin’s cry of heartache; my focus was Brody.

  “Was it worth it, Brody?” I asked, sneering at him. “Leaving us short? Was it?”

  I knew it was unfair to blame him completely. And from the heavy bags he was toting, the run had been successful. But the entire camp was a war zone. There were bodies everywhere—some still moving. Martin’s sobs finally made me break from Brody’s face, which was still in shock.

  “Martin, you should know…She died trying to save Leo. He told her to leave him, but she wouldn’t,” I told him softly.

  “Did you let them get at him, Sara? Is this some sort of revenge?” Brody suddenly snapped, and Derek moved before I could, the sound of fist meeting flesh echoing across the lake.

  Brody’s tall frame crumpled, his knees landing heavily in the mud. Bags fell around him as he shook off the hit. Derek grabbed the collar of his T-shirt as Josh and Tina tried to hold him back.

  “You stupid son of a bitch!” Derek snarled. “You weren’t here, motherfucker! You have no idea. They came in on two sides of us!” He gestured wildly around to where the dead lay everywhere, only to ball up his fist again. “Blame her again. I fucking dare you,” he warned Brody. “I told you before you left not to go. I told you we were due, but you didn’t fucking listen. You’ll listen from now on, asshole, or I’ll shoot you myself. Are we clear?”

  Brody only nodded, sagging in defeat. Derek loomed over him with no fear and more emotion in his face than I’d ever seen. It reminded me somewhat of Jack’s face the night we’d met in Shelly’s Bar. It had been Brody then too. Rubbing my face, I could only focus on getting to Freddie.

  Giving once last glance at Leo, I stood up, turning to Tina. “We need to burn these bodies. We’ll use Jack’s truck to make it easier. You know, just drive, load them up…I need to check on my son and Janie,” I said, but my tone sounded empty to my own ears.

  “Sara?” Derek called tentatively.

  Shaking my head, I walked toward Rich’s cabin. Before opening the door, I shoved the body of the woman—the one Freddie had shot—off the porch with my foot. Though the gore was left behind, at least my son wouldn’t have to look at her again.

  I went inside, tapping on the door in the floor. “Guys, it’s me.”

  The lock disengaged, and I saw Janie’s sweet face peering up at me.

  “Hey, you two okay?”

  She nodded, holding her hands out, and I lifted her up and out, but she whispered, “He’s…not talking.”

  “Okay,” I whispered back, smiling her way. “It’s pretty ugly out there, so if you want to hang out here, I’ll understand.”

  “My mom okay?”

  “Oh, yeah, Janie. She’s fine, but…”

  “I saw Leo and Miss Carol,” she sighed, wearing a sad face.

  Nodding, I cupped her face, only to slip down to the steps. I found Freddie sitting on the edge of the cot down there, his rifle leaning next to him, but he was staring down at the floor.

  “Freddie?” I called, kneeling in front of him. “Buddy, you okay?”

  He nodded, but when his eyes met mine, they were haunted, exhausted, and just plain scared. “I…I…”

  “C’mere,” I whispered, pulling him to my lap. “You didn’t do anything wrong, baby. You were very, very brave.”

  “It…It was coming for us…you…I couldn’t…and I was…” he rambled, his thin frame shivering in my arms.

  “Freddie, you were protecting yourself…us. I promise, you did perfect,” I soothed as he wrapped himself around me.

  “I miss Daddy,” he suddenly wailed, and tears welled up in my eyes at the pure pain I could hear in him. “I miss Daddy, and I couldn’t let it get you, too.”

  The fact that he was calling him “Daddy” was not lost on me. He hadn’t called Jack that since he’d started school, but at the moment, my baby was feeling everything all at once, and that included the absence of his father. He’d seen so much since the beginning—loss of life, grotesque things, and the upheaval of everything he knew.

  Without saying anything, I stood up, keeping him in my arms. Holding him with one hand, I picked up his rifle and ascended the steps. Janie was still there when I came up, and she was sweet enough to take the rifle and close the trap door for me. I made my way outside and down the steps.

  “Sara?” Derek rushed to me. “He okay? Is he hurt?”

  “No, he’ll be fine,” I told him, smiling sadly, but I couldn’t hide my tears. Not this time.

  I took Freddie into our cabin, opting for his room. I sat down on his bed, hoping he’d lie down, but he was content on my lap, so I leaned back against the wall.

  “I love you, Freddie, and your daddy would be so proud of you,” I told him honestly, and when he pulled his f
ace from my neck, I smiled a little. “He would be, you know. He always used to tease me that I’d put you in football pads just to go to the grocery store if I could get away with it.” I grinned when Freddie sniffled and giggled a little at the same time. “It’s true. I never wanted anything to happen to you. You bumped your head once when you were just two, and I about went crazy, drove all the way to Grandpa Rich’s so he could look at you.

  “Your dad, however, laughed at me. He told me that you were a boy and that I’d better get used to bumps, scrapes, and bruises, that you’d get them every day just because…” I pinched his chin gently between my thumb and forefinger. “What you did…He’d be proud of you because there’s absolutely nothing wrong with protecting those people you love, Freddie. Nothing. These are scary, ugly times, and I hate that you’re seeing it, but it’s the truth, the reality that surrounds us.”

  “I’ve…started to…forget what he looks like.”

  Tears ran unchecked down my face, but I nodded, reaching for his scrapbook. “Here, sweetheart.”

  I flipped past the news articles, aiming for the things he’d posted in there toward the back. I bypassed ticket stubs and stuff from the zoo in Portland, finally finding the picture I wanted. It was of the three of us, with silly smiles and happy eyes. It had been taken on my phone, but I’d printed it at the kiosk at the drug store. Jack was in his camo, and Freddie absolutely had to match him.

  “Here, Freddie.” I tapped the picture. “This…This is where you came from. Never, ever forget that. Don’t you dare forget that we love you so much, that you came from that love.”

  Freddie reached out and ripped the picture from the scrapbook, holding it in his hands. I let him have a moment, and my eyes drifted to Jack’s old dog tags. Freddie had even left the chain attached. For almost a year, Freddie had worn them, wanting to be just like Jack.

  “I miss him too, Freddie,” I whispered, nodding when my son turned my way. “So…what do we do about that? I’m kinda running on blind, stupid faith here, buddy. I want to believe he’s out there coming for us, that he’s fighting, but…every day gets harder and harder. I’m just being honest here, kiddo.”