Plead Forgiveness: Betrayed Twice (Loyalty Series)

by Dobsyn, Aury

  His hands slid up her calves to her knees as he slowly position his body between her legs. When his large palms covered her hips, he said in a deep voice, “The verra sight of ye intoxicates me with the desire to touch, taste and kiss yer delectable body. I burn to have ye in my arms, to stoke ye as I would a fire, until yer heat equals my own. I want to be inside ye, until ye surrender into euphoric ecstasy.”

  The smoldering flame Ella saw in his eyes, coupled with his powerfully sensual words, sent a heated shiver racing through her body. Her personal battle of restraint was lost when she felt the warmth of his palms cupping her face, his thumbs stroking her cheeks. His kiss was an awakening experience that left her reeling, but clinging for more. He tilted her head to deepen the kiss, catapulting her to a place beyond logic and reason.

  The hunger of his kiss shattered her serenity. Her willpower to rebuff his tender assault disappeared. She succumbed to the force of his lips, savoring every moment until her fervor matched his.

  Her hands were ravenous as they explored his muscular chest and broad shoulders. She suddenly felt his hands drift down the contours of her body to grip with possessiveness her bottom. He reeled her in so that his arousal pressed to the core of her body.

  Remembering the searing pain she felt the eve of their wedding, she pushed him away with surprising strength. Quickly scrambling to her feet, she raced over to the mare and vaulted on her back. Eager to be away, she never looked back and did not see the dejection and overwhelming pain in his eyes.

  Gavin’s raging desire destroyed his normal control. In his haste to claim her, he failed to recall the pain she endured on their wedding night. Instant regret prevented him from giving chase.

  Emerging from the loch, he cursed his impatience. He then dressed and saddled his horse. For a moment, he stared down at the saddle Ella had not bothered with in her mad flight to keep him at a distance.

  At a sedate pace, he set off for home, reminding himself to send someone for the discarded saddle.

  His thoughts then focused on Ella and gaining her trust. He desperately wanted to abolish the pain she burden herself with for the past eight years. He also wanted her in his bed, but only if willing and eager.

  16

  Darkening clouds had gathered overhead when Ella arrived back at the castle just after the noon hour. Lady Esme had greeted her, and by the older woman’s anxious expression, she knew immediately something was amiss.

  “Ye must come quick. Rachel has gone into labor and our midwife has sent word that she canna leave the Mackenzie holding.”

  Rushing over to her mother-in-law, she grabbed her satchel, then set off at a brisk pace for Rachel’s cottage.

  “When did her labor pains begin?”

  “Last eve,” Lady Esme stated, trying to keep pace with the healer.

  Halting abruptly, Ella asked, “Why wasn't I informed?”

  “Rachel knew ye were in mourning. She dinna wish to bother ye since we had already sent for the midwife.”

  Ella started sprinting towards the village, her fear so great that nothing else mattered. When she entered the tiny cottage, Helena and Boyd were with Rachel and their faces reflected their own fear for the woman lying on the bed, withering in pain.

  Looking around the cottage, Ella noted that they carried out her suggestions. Clean linen and water were by the table. Extra water heated in the stone fireplace and two leather straps hung from the ceiling over Rachel.

  Pulling out the small bag of herbs previously made specifically for this occasion, she gave it to Helena and ordered, “Mix this with steaming water, and then give it to Rachel. It will lessen the pain and help reduce infection.”

  Turning to Boyd, she said, “I know you love your wife, but for now you must leave.” Rachel’s husband dropped a kiss on his wife’s perspiring head, then left the cottage.

  “Shhh, all will be well Rachel,” Ella crooned. “You know I have been assisting with births for many years.” She then quickly, but thoroughly washed her hands.

  Rachel would have smiled if not for the labor pain that engulfed her, making her body go rigid from the gripping contraction in her abdomen.

  “You must breathe. Each time you feel the pain come, focus on breathing,” she stated, then put the apron Helena had given and then moved to the foot of the bed.

  “Now, let me take a look and see how far along-” Her words stopped when another contraction assailed the laboring woman, followed by the outpouring of clear liquid from her womb. Dear God, the bairn will be coming much sooner than anticipated.

  “Helena, help me move her down the bed.”

  Once Rachel was in the right position, Ella examined the position of the babe. In a voice that concealed her fear, she confirmed, “Rachel, the babe has yet to turn. It cannot be born without help.”

  Rachel replied in a small, frightened voice, “What do ye mean, needs help?”

  Over the past fortnight, Rachel had accompanied and assisted Ella with tending to the ailments of the villagers. Although she had taught Rachel much during this time, she neglected to inform her friend about the problems associated with the birthing process.

  “I must turn the babe around while he is inside you. It will be painful, but if I don’t do this, you and the babe will not survive.”

  Helena cried out, “Dear Lord, nae!”

  With her confident gaze fixed on Ella, Rachel said, “I have complete faith in ye. Do what ye must.”

  Rachel’s trust astounded Ella, causing her eyes to flood with unshed tears. She silently vowed to see that this courageous woman and her child survived, even if she had to move heaven and hell to do so.

  Regaining her composure, she lifted the sheet and eased her hand inside Rachel’s womb. She was thankful her hands were so small, allowing her to access the tight, fragile region of a woman. With practiced and experienced fingers, she checked to make sure the cord was not around the babe’s neck, while Rachel gritted her teeth. Her movements were slow and time seemed to stand still as she attempted to maneuver the babe into the correct position.

  While trying to angle the head downward, Ella felt the gush of warm blood. With every moment passing, Rachel lost more blood and soon would not have the strength to continue laboring to bring new life into the world.

  Ella’s heart lurched when she was unable to turn the babe without the cord curling around the neck. She removed her hand, then tried with her non-dominant one, hoping for a different result. Tentatively, she tried lowering the head different ways.

  A cry of relief broke from her lips when blessedly the babe’s head lowered, free from the cord. Bubbling joy shone in her eyes when she yelled “Push, Rachel! Push hard!”

  Time slowed as Rachel fought for her child’s life. Rewarded moments later, the top of the newborn’s head came into view.

  “I see the head! Keeping pushing, Rachel,” she encouraged.

  With the assistance of the leather straps hung over the bed, and Helena kneeling behind her, Rachel pulled herself into a better position to labor. She let out a bloodcurdling scream, and then used all her remaining strength to push the babe from her womb.

  Lady Esme continued to bath her brow, while adding to Ella’s encouraging words. “Keep pushing, sweetheart. The bairn is coming.”

  “You’re doing well, Rachel. One hard push is all that’s needed,” Ella said.

  The laboring mother wailed one last time as the bairn emerged from her body into Ella’s waiting hands.

  “You have a son, a very large son, Rachel.”

  With haste, Ella cleaned out the silent infant’s mouth, which in turn let loose a loud bellow of outrage. To the women inside the cottage and the men on the other side of the timbered walls, it was music to the ears.

  Ella cut the cord, then handed the babe to Helena to clean and swaddle. Turning back to the new mother, she delivered the after birth. Blessedly, Rachael swooned shortly thereafter.

  “Lady Esme, please bring a needle and thread from my satchel.” />
  “What?”

  Ella knew the only way to save a mother whose flesh severely ripped from delivering a large babe is to stitch the area closed. Aunt Eleanor had made an extensive study of the birthing process, which remained unheard of in England and Scotland.

  “I don’t have time to explain, you must trust me. Please, the needle and thread.”

  Using small stitches and a steady hand, she closed the wound, periodically cleaning the area with hot water to avoid infection. Although fever is inevitable, stitching the torn flesh reduces infection and lessens the amount of blood loss.

  Rachel remained unconscious during the delicate procedure. After a thorough bath, dressed in a fresh sleeping gown, she awakened briefly.

  Lady Esme pulled Ella aside to speak with her privately. “What are her chances?”

  “Much improved now that she nae longer bleeds, but the next few hours will be critical.”

  “What can I do to help?”

  “The babe will need a wet nurse, and I will need apple vinegar cider or malt ale.”

  “Thirsty are ye?”

  Ella gave a humorless chuckle. “Nae, I will bathe Rachel with it.”

  The older woman’s jaw dropped in stunned disbelief before she stammered, “But we have just bathed her.”

  “The brew lowers fever when applied to the skin.”

  “Is she feverish then?”

  “Nae, but she soon will be. The birth was difficult, the babe overly large, and she lost more blood than most. Aye, she will become feverish, but the yeast in the cider and ale will help, more than cool water alone.”

  When Ella saw doubt lingered on the older woman’s brow, she explained, “After my Aunt Eleanor delivered a stillborn eight years ago, she remained barren. Refusing to accept such a fate, she dedicated her life to learning all she could about pregnancy and the birthing process. She researched medicinal texts written by the greatest minds to ever live. The monks at the Westshire abbey travelled to foreign countries to gather research for her. Philip rewarded my aunt’s efforts by funding these quests. We applied the knowledge she gained. In the last two years and over a hundred births, we lost less than a handful of women, all who delivered twins.” Ella paused for a moment then added, “My methods may sound strange, but they work. Please trust me in this.”

  “I should nae have doubted ye. I’ll leave now to do yer bidding and return with all due haste.”

  Sheets of rain pelted the thatched roof above and lightning illuminated the darken sky, as Lady Esme rushed out of the cottage. With the winds roaring like an angry beast, Ella felt a stab of guilt for sending the older woman out on such stormy night.

  The ominous sound of crackling thunder startled Helena as she tilted a goblet of water to Rachel’s mouth. Ella opened a window to allow a breeze into the cottage. They waited patiently and within the hour, Lady Esme burst through the cottage door with two jugs in her hands and a wet nurse in tow.

  Rachel woke long enough to swallow a small amount of water before succumbing to a sleep once again. As Ella predicted, fever came with vengeance an hour later. Rachel’s peaceful sleep became fitful, followed by delirious speech and moments of uncontrolled thrashing. Ella advised Helena to take the babe and the wet nurse to her own cottage so they could have a peaceful night’s sleep.

  The havoc beyond the walls of the cottage did nothing to alleviate the fear in Ella’s heart as she bathed Rachel’s burning body with vinegar and ale. Although her fever broke soon after, it returned continuously over the next few hours.

  Gavin arrived well after midnight, and upon Ella’s request, escorted his mother to the castle for much needed sleep.

  By mid afternoon the following day, Rachel’s fever broke yet again, but this time it did not return. Regardless of the new mother’s improving health, Ella adamantly denied anyone entrance into the cottage, including the women who assisted with the birth and Boyd, Rachel’s husband.

  Boyd stoically remained outside the cottage, irate as ever.

  “I want to see my wife!” he said for the fifth time since dawn.

  “Nae, you will only endanger her further.”

  “When?”

  “Soon.”

  “Ye said that an hour ago.”

  “Aye, I did.”

  “I canna take this waiting.”

  “The wait will soon be over, my friend. She improves each hour, and your son is quite hearty. For now, I implore you to bathe, eat, and sleep. Your wife will have great need of you in the days ahead. I will send for you when I am confident that Rachel’s fever will not return.” When his face lit up, Ella quickly said, “But, it will be a very short visit and you must keep your distance.”

  With an angry scowl, Rachel said, “I want to see my son!”

  Ella sighed as she repeated, “Nae.”

  “Why will ye nae let me see my son?”

  Ella sat down on the stool and started to brush Rachel’s freshly washed hair as she explained, “You know why. If the fever returns, your son would be at risk. After all the work you did to bring him into this world, it would be wise to practice a bit of patience. Also, you are weaker than a newborn kitten. Mayhap tomorrow. ”

  The new mother folded her arms across her chest, glared over her shoulder at Ella, and then spat, “And ye are naught but a vicious harpy.”

  Bristling indignation replaced Rachael’s normal sweet disposition, but it did not dampen Ella’s high spirits. She understood that Rachael longed for her child, completely oblivious to the fragile state of her own body. Because she valued Rachael’s life, Ella remained resolute in her decision.

  By the break of dawn the next day, as the red and orange glow of the horizon began to crawl into the cloudless sky, Ella stood just outside the cottage staring down at Boyd. He sat on a bench next to the front door, with his son cradled in his arms, and a huge smile on his face.

  “Is she well . . . may we see her?

  Ella stroked the bairn’s head and said, “Aye, Boyd, your wife will be just fine, or will be once she sees you and the bairn. You may go in now.”

  “Lady Ella, I canna thank ye enough for what ye have done for me and my family.”

  “All I ask is that you look after Rachel for a few hours while I get some rest.” Then in a stern voice, she added, “You will check each hour to see if she becomes feverish, aye?”

  Too happy to be ashamed of the tears that streamed down his face, he replied, “Aye, Milady.”

  Ella heard the couple’s tearful reunion as she shut the door to the cottage. She remembered her mother once saying that the greatest reward possible for a healer is hearing cries of joy after aiding someone. Aye, Mama, you were right.

  With unabashed joy, Iain escorted Ella back to the castle moments later. He thanked her numerous times for saving the lives of Rachel and his nephew. He also informed her that the wet nurse agreed to continue feeding the babe for as long as necessary.

  *

  By the time Ella reached the corridor that lead to her chamber, the effects of the two sleepless nights, added with the emotional strain, caught up to her. She swayed with exhaustion as she passed Gavin’s chamber, and then startled when the chamber door across from his opened and revealed Alice.

  “Good morning, Milady,” the maid said with a triumphant smirk on her face.

  Ella learned a sennight ago that Gavin’s leman occupied the chamber across from his afore returning from England with his intended bride. She had not been angry at the time, since he bedded the whore before they were married. Now, seeing Alice emerge from that chamber, made her immediately suspicious of the buxom woman.

  Not bothering to conceal her ire, she demanded, “Explain your presence here!”

  “By Laird Gavin’s command, I am returning to my old chamber. The one I occupied before yer arrival,” Alice snickered.

  Shocked and held immobile, Ella stared at her husband’s lover. Dejection soon yielded to fury that he had reclaimed his leman. God must hate me.

  Alice�
��s words brutally ripped apart Ella’s heart and the scattered pieces blackened with soul deep hatred. Two days hence, Gavin had tried to make love to her, and like a scared rabbit, she ran from him, pushing him back into this whore’s welcoming arms.

  She brushed past Alice and retreated to her chamber. Crumbling to the bed, Ella then allowed anguish to engulf her. Let him take Alice to his bed. I do not care, not for happiness lost once again.

  17

  Due to his overwhelming concern for his wife, Gavin slept very little the past two days. After assessing the damage caused by the storm, he headed back to the keep by midmorning..

  Upon entering the hall, he learned of Ella’s return to the castle. At present, she slumbered in her chamber. Although anxious to see her and express his pride in the miracle she accomplished with Rachel, he did not intend to apologize for trying to make love to her two days prior.

  He refused to feel any guilt over his attempt to seduce her or take the blame for the deaths of her aunt and uncle. He understood that her pain was so great it made it difficult to see clearly that her loved ones would have died regardless of her marriage. He believed in time she would see the truth, but his hope and patience were rapidly dwindling.

  After a few hours sleep, Ella woke to Lady Esme sweet voice.

  “Good morrow, lass.”

  As the peace of her short slumber evaporated, reality and misery set in, but she gave no evidence of it in the presence of her mother-in-law.

  “Since you are smiling, I assume Rachel is well.”

  “Aye that she is . . . thanks to ye.”

  Ella shrugged, stubbornly refusing to engage in any conversation.

  Lady Esme suspected something amiss, but did not voice her concern. Instead, she said, “I ordered ye a bath and will assist-”

  “I do not need assistance. As you well known, I am quite used to bathing myself.”

  Seeing that her terse words hurt the kind woman, Ella immediately felt contrite and said, “Please, take nae offense. I just need some time alone.”