Alone

by Abigail Wallace

  I think they get it.” I vomit up, wishing I had chosen better words. “They’re probably angry too.”

  “They won’t get it until we make them get it.” he insists. “But you do, I can see it in your eyes that you’re like me, you understand.” There’s that hiss again. We maintain eye contact until he finally breaks it and walks away. I let out the breath I was holding in and look around the now empty house. Everyone else is in the garden now.

  I stand and think about what Evan just said for a few minutes. Why does he think I can make them understand? What is it exactly that they need to understand? I find myself storming towards the garden. I don’t know what I plan to do once I’m out there, what I plan to say.

  I walk through the back door onto the patio outside of the garden, Evan somehow managed to get deep into the garden before I followed him outside. I drop the door by accident, making a loud noise that makes everyone turn their attention to me. I walk into the garden to join them.

  “Did you really have to slam the only door that’s still intact?” Kevin jokes. I roll my eyes at him. “Okay, then.” He frowns, taking a step back.

  “Scarlet, are you okay?” Ally asks. I feel anger settle in my gut. “You look upset.” “

  I don’t trust you guys.” I say bluntly. “I don’t trust any of this. How’d you all end up here?”

  “Uncle Alec got us here.” Ally replies. “Scarlet we saved you, you can trust us.”

  “Yeah! I saved you from dying of hunger, sleep deprivation and dehydration.” Kevin points out.

  “Fair,” I nod “So you saved my life, but why?”

  “Because normal people don’t let other people die.” Kat answers somewhat sarcastically. “What do we look like? Murderers?”

  I shrug. I mean they could be. Alec stares at me in complete silence. I turn my attention to him.

  “And you’re in charge?” I ask, sounding like one of those picky ladies in a restaurant asking for a manager.

  He shrugs, “I mean, survival is more of a team effort.” he replies. “Nobody’s ‘in charge’ we all just help to keep each other alive.”

  “So, we’re just gonna stay here and survive?” I ask, raising my voice slightly.

  “What do you suggest we do?” Alec replies sarcastically.

  I look at Evan, “Well, not commit mass murder, but we need to do something.” Is what i want to say to Evan, instead I say something much worse. “You’re angry, right?”

  He slightly nods his head.

  “Let’s do something about it. Let’s, I don’t know, figure out who’s responsible for this and blow them up.” My eyes meet with Alec’s. Evan smirks a bit. The others just stare at me like I’m insane. I probably look insane.

  “That’s ridiculous.” Alec chuckles. “We don’t know who’s responsible, and even if we did, we aren’t all psychotic.” He gestures to the others who are scattered around the garden. I pause, staring at the group of people before me.

  “I’m not crazy! I just don’t like the idea of doing nothing.”

  “You know, if you don’t like the way I’m running things, you can leave.” Alec points in a random direction.

  “Okay, why don’t you just calm down.” Shark says from behind me. “We can talk about coming up with a project or something if that’s what you need. But you aren’t helping your case by starting drama.”

  I don’t even turn to look at him, but I begin to feel myself calm down. Butterflies flutter around my stomach. “Don’t go falling in love Scarlet. You just met him.” I scold myself.

  “You literally just got here today. You don’t get to start demanding that we blow people up.” Alec says, I can tell he’s annoyed. “We do have projects though, and if you don’t mind, I’d like to get back to one of them.” He adjusts his grip on the shovel he’s using.

  “Well, what about fixing those rotting stairs or floors or trying to find more survivors or something?” I argue.

  “You do not get to storm out here, whine about not trusting us, and then tell me how to run things.” he growls. I know I may be overstepping, but I need something to focus on or I’m going to lose my mind.

  “Let’s just sit down and talk about it later.” Shark suggests. Alec scowls at the idea.

  “That’s all I want.” I say. I’m much calmer now. I’m beginning to realize that the way I approached this was a bit dramatic, but I just need to be heard on this. “I’m sorry, I don’t want to take over. I just need something to focus on. I need a reason to, well you know.” I look to the ground.

  “Fine, we’ll talk.” Alec rolls his eyes. “Meet in the living room in twenty minutes.”

  I smirk, knowing that I won the argument, with the help of mystery boy.

  I turn to Shark, I look him up and down. Studying his muscular figure, his dark hair, his deep eyes. I take a deep breath and smile at him. He scowls in return, but I don’t mind. He backs away from the door to let me in and then goes back out to join the others.

  2

  Chapter 2

  Everyone gathers in the living room. Alec glares at me as everyone finds a seat.

  Kat sits next to me, “Feel better?” she whispers. I ignore her.

  “So?” Alec raises his eyebrows in annoyance, “You wanted to talk… start talking.”

  “This was technically Shark’s idea.” I retort, but I talk anyway, “Look, we all just went through the most tragic thing we’ve probably ever been through and you guys are just kind of here, surviving. And that’s great. I just feel like we could be doing more. Something purposeful.”

  “I understand. Trust me, I’m angry too. Going complete psycho and killing anyone that may somehow be alive, however, is a horrible way to go about this.” Alec says. I look at Evan hoping to get some help.

  “These people deserve it.” Evan chimes in. I almost feel guilty for appreciating the backup. Shark sits quietly, observing our conversation, his attention trained specifically on Evan.

  “Even if I was as bloodthirsty as you two, which I’m not, we have no way to do that. ‘These people’ probably aren’t even in the country. But how about this, how about you explain exactly how you would go about releasing your pent up anger on these guys? I could use some good entertainment” Alec and I lock eyes, the room grows silent.

  I think frantically for an answer, I refuse to look like a moron in front of this guy.

  “Why not just blow them up?” I finally say. Repeating what I said back in the garden.

  Alec crosses his arms, “You probably don’t know a thing about bombs.”

  I got nothing. He’s right, I don’t know anything about bombs.

  “I do, though.” Evan says. Why am I not surprised? “We build a bomb, track them down and boom, karma.” He grins. I feel my anger dying down a little. I feel less homicidal, realizing how crazy I must sound.

  “Look, I don’t care about blowing some people up, but what are you guys doing to stay busy? To make things better.” I change my angle.

  “For your information we’ve been gardening and searching for survivors. How do you think we found you?” Alec argues, he turns to Kevin. “You think we can put her back?” he mumbles.

  “Okay, I’ll admit I didn’t know that. But like this house isn’t in the best shape and… and, I don’t know.” “And I’m bored and need something to do.” I finish in my head.

  “You didn’t know that because you just got here.” Alec balls his hands into fist, his jaw clenched tight. “You know what though? Since you obviously think you know how to do this better than the rest of us, and I’m tired of listening to you talk. Why don’t you just take over from here. You are in charge.” Alec says.”Congratulations Boss.” He claps his hands mockingly.

  I raise an eyebrow, “Seriously?” I say shocked.

  He glares at me. Nobody else in the room moves a muscle, they barely even breathe.

  “I do have some ideas.” I say, my tone threatening. Alec takes a deep breath, I can almost see the image running through
his head of him punching my face in.

  “Well, let me just leave you to your ‘ideas’ then,” he growls. He stands up and looks around the room. “You guys have fun with this one.” He stomps out.

  Tension lingers in the air. I’m shaking, possibly from fear, more likely from excitement. I’m guessing having him hate me is probably going to suck. But part of me enjoyed it, it was quite the adrenaline rush.

  One by one, the others exhale, reminding me that they’re in the room with me.

  “You must really have a death wish.” Kevin jokes. I think it was a joke. I shrug, looking at Shark who is now giving me a look of judgement.

  Not long after we were all sitting around the wooden dining table.

  “So, Boss, what’s the plan?” Evan asks, I can’t tell if he’s mocking me or not. I pause for a moment, everyone looking at me awaiting an answer.

  “Well,” I eye the house, “The house could use some work.” I say. I stop and think for a moment, looking around the table. “And I’m sure there are other survivors out there that could use our help.” I add.

  “Where are all those resources coming from?” Ally asks.

  I frown, “There are other abandoned houses everywhere, I’m sure there are plenty of usable resources laying around.” I respond, my tone more condescending than I intended.

  “So, the plan is construction and search and rescue?” Evan asks.

  I nod.

  “Where’s the attack plan?” he asks, narrowing his dark eyes.

  “We’ll come up with something, but until then let’s just do what we know to do. We can clean this place up and help anyone else who might be out there. I feel like if we start there, the rest will come.” I look around hoping that the group will agree with me.

  “You threw a pretty big fit for somebody who just wants to replace floor boards.” Kevin rolls his eyes. I don’t know how to reply. He’s right, it does seem dramatic of me.

  “That wasn’t my goal.” I say.

  “If your goal was to piss off Alec you succeeded.” Ally shrugs. “Scarlet, you don’t just get to come in here and take over. Especially not on your first day.” We sit in silence as I feel my face turning red. After a long moment everyone, but Evan gets up and leaves.

  “We don’t have to ‘come up with something’ you know,” he says.

  “What?” I ask, mostly zoned out.

  “You don’t have to come up with an attack plan, I already have one.” I turn and look at him. I don’t have much energy left after today, so instead of replying, I just stare at him. Eventually he too walks out, leaving me to wonder what he meant by that. An attack plan?

  After about three hours have passed, I finally built up the courage to talk to Evan alone.

  “What do you want?” he grumbles.

  “Relax, I wanted to ask you about something you said earlier.” I tell him.

  “What is it?”

  “You said you had an attack plan, remember? The others may not approve, but in the case where we do find them and we do have a chance to hurt them, I wanna be able to.” I explain, “You said something about bombs?”

  “You wanna know how to build a bomb?” He doesn’t quite buy it.

  “Yes, I want to know how to build a bomb.”

  “Follow me.” he says, looking around the living room to make sure it’s clear. I follow him to the door and outside.

  “Where are we going?” I ask.

  “I have some notes in one of the houses over here.” he explains. “Plans for a bomb, and some other stuff too.” I remember Kat mentioning that Evan would disappear for days. This must be what he’s been doing, he’s actually working on a bomb. I don’t know if I’m impressed or scared.

  I follow him up the concrete walk of a house on the corner of the next street over. This house somehow looks like it hasn’t been touched by the destruction around us, the blue siding is faded, but still pretty. I follow him through the large wooden door. The house is dark. I can see, but not without effort.

  “One second.” he says as he begins to go around pulling out random pieces of paper from different hiding spots around the house. “Can never be too careful.” he chuckles nervously. It seems uncharacteristic of him to act nervous. I’m not sure how I feel.

  “Here we go.” he says, placing a decent sized stack of papers on the desk in the corner of the small living room, “These are instructions and some research.” He hands me some of the papers. I page through them blindly, not sure of what I was supposed to be looking at.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll explain it.” He smiles.

  “Are those maps?” I ask him, pointing to two pieces of paper that had strayed slightly from the pile.

  “Oh yeah,” His voice fills with excitement, “So get this, there’s this bunker on the edge of New Mexico. I saw it when I was wandering around out there and I could be wrong, but I think they have something to do with what happened.”

  “Why?” I ask, confused.

  “So, these are the blueprints I’ve been working on.” He shuffles through the papers on the table.

  “Why does he have blueprints?” I wonder. But I don’t ask. I don’t want to set him off.

  “But, why do you think they have something to do with this?” I ask again.

  “Just a hunch.” He shrugs. I know it’s more than that, Evan knows something, but I don’t ask again.

  “You can show me how to make one?” I ask, not sure if I trust it or not.

  “I’ve already started to work on one.” He smirks slightly.

  “How long have you been working on these?” I ask him. I scan the maps, they’re filled with detailed notes and color coded dots. I wonder what they mean.

  “I’ve been here a couple of weeks, I started working on this before I even found my way to Alec.” he explains. “Ever since I lost my family in the attacks I’ve been focused on this.”

  “How did you know how to do all this in the first place?” I want to ask.

  “Look Scarlet, the two of us can pull this off.” He presses his index finger against one of the maps, “The others may not be for it, but you can convince them. We don’t even need them really, you and I could pull it off.” I can’t tell if he’s being serious or if he’s just trying to manipulate me.

  I’m reluctant to agree to help him, it does sound like pure insanity after all. He stands across from me, his arms crossed over his chest, awaiting a response.

  “I don’t know.” I finally say. I wasn’t prepared for this situation.

  “Come on, we have the power to do something, so let’s do it.” he pleads, “Just think about it, we’d make a good team I think.”

  I wish I could say I wasn’t intrigued. Usually when a crazy man with a thirst for blood asks you to join him in bombing a large group of people, the answer would be to run in the other direction. I just need to do something though. I need a distraction.

  “I just don’t think—” I pause. I know he’s insane, anyone could see it, but what if this isn’t just insanity? What if he could actually pull this off.

  “I’ll just say yes, so I can keep an eye on it.” I tell myself.

  “Just think about it.” he repeats. I don’t know why he’s so desperate for me to help him with this.

  “Alright.” I reply. He drops his arms away from his chest. I see his demeanor immediately shift. He’s no longer defensive and desperate.

  “We need to go back before the others notice both of us are missing.” he says. “If they find this stuff, I’m dead. Scarlet, you can’t tell anyone about this.”

  I nod, still afraid of him, afraid of what would happen if I told.

  When we return, I go in first. Evan says it would be suspicious of us to go in together. I suppose he’s right.

  Ally and Kat show me to our room and from that point on, the night is filled with the peaceful bliss of sleep. Something I haven’t had the chance to enjoy since the attacks.

  * * *

  “Okay, so you two.” I sa
y, pointing to Kevin and Kat, “I know it’s kind of sudden, but I’d like to send you out on a search. Just for the next couple weeks. You’ll be out looking for survivors.” I tell them.

  I know Alec telling me I was in charge was sarcasm, but I’m going to show him that my ideas are gonna work, or at least keep us busy until we figure something better out.

  “You’re cool with this?” Kat looks at Alec, unconvinced.

  “You have three weeks, also if you find supplies bring them back with you. If you’re not back within the given time we’ll probably assume you’re dead.” Alec tells them.

  “Really?” I mouth to him. He doesn’t notice. He stopped paying attention to me after the meeting last night.

  “Comforting.” Kat mumbles, “What if we don’t want to go.” She scoots closer to Kevin.

  “You don’t have to.” I say. “But I think this will be really important.”

  “Come on Kat,” Kevin smiles, “it’ll be a fun adventure.” The two of them exchange a look, she offers him a light smile.

  “I guess it won’t be too bad…” Kat sighs. “But if you get me killed, you are so dead.” she says to Kevin.

  “We don’t have enough people or resources to search for you, so don’t die.” Alec says bluntly, cutting off Kat and Kevin’s conversation. “The rest of us here will begin…fixing up the house.” He rolls his eyes. “Because we’re suddenly on an interior design show now.” I hear him mutter under his breath.

  I smile at both of them, “So, will you do it?” I ask, eager to show Alec that I can get them to do what I ask of them.

  “I’m down.” Kevin says.

  “Sure, I’m always up for some adventure.” Kat agrees, I sense sarcasm in her voice but I ignore it. The two of them walk away, probably to explain everything to Ally.

  Alec comes closer to me,“If they die I am going to kill you,” he threatens.