by J H Cardwell
“I didn’t think you would get to come home for Christmas break. Aren’t you in some pre-season tournament?” She said, seeming nervous. “At least that’s what I heard from Elle.” Thank God, she’s been keeping up with my life, at least a little. I bet she would be mortified to know that I talked to Finn all the time to see what she’d been up to. I knew John hadn’t been in her life since April, other than a few visits here and there. That was a feeling I couldn’t have imagined would have been so relieving.
I responded. “The tournament doesn’t start until New Year’s Day. I’m here for nearly two weeks. It’s a much needed break.” I saw that, a look of what…desire, relief? Oh Reese. Can I still read you like I once could? I was hoping she was happy I would be home for a while. I wasn’t entirely sure though. Had we grown apart? Oh God, I hoped not. I wanted her just as much now as I had our Senior year of high school. That seemed like a lifetime ago. When I look at her, I do see a ghost of John’s mouth on hers, and his hands on her. Damn it! Why was I doing this to myself?
“Tate, are you okay?” Shit, she noticed. Play it cool Tate, play it cool.
“Of course. I…I was just thinking.” Great, why wouldn’t I be thinking? “Reese,” I stepped a little closer to her. “Would it be possible for us to get together some while we’re both home?” I took the leap. I don’t think it’s too much to ask to spend a little time catching up.
“Sure. I think that would be great. We could ask Elle and Finn and everyone to join us…it would be fun.” I let out a long sigh. Oh no, that’s not what I had in mind at all…Not. At. All.
“Yeah, only I didn’t mean with anyone else…I meant just the two of us.” I instinctively reached for her hands then dropped mine back down by my side. Shit. She noticed. Her breathing just picked up again. This is too hard to be this close to her, and not be devouring her, and claiming her. My body ached. My soul was turning on me for not grabbing her up right here.
“Um, I think we could manage some alone time to talk. What did you have in mind?” Her cheeks just flushed. Was she thinking how much she wanted to be alone with me…and not just talking? Why can’t I read minds…damn I want to know what she’s thinking?
“How about tomorrow afternoon? We could go to the ice skating park and grab an early dinner,” I wanted it to be tonight. I actually wanted to leave with her right now. I could picture us kissing, pressing, loving, sweating…Ahhh…I was going to drive myself crazy. I knew she wouldn’t do any of those things. She looks too wonderful to have been pining over me…over us. I’m suddenly thinking she’s moved on, and I just haven’t heard yet. She’ll probably tell me that when we’re alone. Now I’m not so sure I want to meet…what I don’t know won’t hurt me right? No, that’s stupid. I have to know, I have to know if she’s lonely too. Lonely for the love we had…correction, have for one another, right? Tomorrow wouldn’t come soon enough.
night out with my girls is the best. Most call it Girls Night Out (GNO), we call it a Playdate! Because we feel so free being all together...no holds barred. Penderton is a small town. Everyone knows something about everybody, and a lot of folks are kin, somewhere down the line. Because of this, we had to take it to a restaurant just outside of town, in Greensboro, called Rucker’s. The waiter, Finn’s cousin, Blake, was a hottie now. He was twenty-one, and known as a nerd in high school, but he had developed, and in all the right places. Of course, that made Chloe use all God gave her to flirt with him. Blake was red faced every time he came to the table. Luckily, he knew better than to card us. He was willing to risk his job to serve us…plus I think Chloe scared the shit out of him.
The bar area was always the most fun. They kept the music blaring, had dart boards out, and TV’s on sports. It was the perfect location for just hanging out. Plus, they stayed open until at least one in the morning…and they weren’t too far away from home. Sheppard’s cab company was always close by to carry a needy person home as well. So, we had no DD tonight…a good time to be had by all.
And that was surely the case. We had appetizers and lots of gossip to share, especially since we were back home. Everyone we ran into that knew us brought up old gossip. We were having our second glass of wine when Josh Davis walked in….shortly followed by Lisa. My stomach dropped. I had not seen her since…well in not long enough. Luckily, they didn’t come near the bar section, but went straight for the main dining area. Maybe I would be able to enjoy my evening without having to make eye contact with her. I could stand to catch up with Josh though. I still had a soft place in my heart for Carter’s older brother. I realized I was turning red when Chloe kicked my leg under the table.
“Ouch! What the heck was that for?” I said a little confused.
“Um, don’t let that bitch ruin your fun, okay? Let’s show her we know how to have a good time,” Chloe said, and really meaning it. Then she summoned for Blake to come back to the table. “Hello handsome, want to get lucky tonight?” Oh crap, I thought, here we go. “Hey, will you bring us a double shot of tequila for each of us…and make it on the house.” Chloe said so matter of fact.
“Um, I’ll be glad to bring you the shots under the radar, but, um, I’ll have to pay out of my pocket if it’s ‘on the house’,” he said pretty timidly.
“Well shit, that’s okay for one night, right? Now, scoot along, go and get ‘em.” Chloe said. Then I felt a need to interrupt…
“Blake”, I said grabbing his arm. “We’ll pay for them, if you don’t mind just bringing them to us.” I winked at him…so unlike me. Not even an hour with my girls, and Chloe was rubbing off on me.
Blake brought the shots. I watched over at the bar for him to make them since I didn’t have my trusty pink water bottle with me. I had gotten a little less worried about that, especially considering I knew why and how I had been taken advantage of a couple of years ago. We were screaming and laughing at each other by now, and people were staring. We set the shots up on the table. I was immediately reminded of when Elle got me tipsy after Tate and I broke up. I almost went there…to that time…until Elle elbowed me and brought me back to the present. I shot her a look, and she shot me one back. Then we laughed out loud. God I loved my friends. This was the stuff, spending time with them, even if we weren’t going to remember all of it tomorrow!
And we were having such a great time. Blake came back with more shots. This time, someone had turned the music up pretty loud…at least I think they did…wait, it might have just been me that thought it was loud…Tequila can do strange things to a person. Anyhow, Elle pushed me out of the booth when ‘Put Your Hands Up’ by Kylie Minogue was blasting through the speakers. I was pissed at first, but then I decided to get into it. I was dancing beside the booth to the music. I was in fact…putting my hands up, and shaking my ass. I was having a blast. Then this cute waiter, someone I had never seen before, came up behind me and put his hands on my hips and was dipping and dancing with me. The girls were going crazy…hell, I was going crazy. This was so much fun. Fun…until I looked off to my left and Tate was staring at me….staring with a frown on his face. I gasped! This is the Tate I remembered. I turned quickly back to my friends. I grabbed the waiter, (his hands were still on my hips), and was swaying pretty heavily. The guy behind me was starry eyed, and cracking up. I was too for that matter. I was sweating by the time the song ended. I leaned over and kissed the unknown guy on the cheek. He shook his head, and went back to work.
What in the hell? I don’t usually go this crazy. What was that about? I forgot there was another set of eyes set on me, until I leaned back, fanning myself and looked off to my side. Tate was staring at me, this time with a smirk on his face. What? That wasn’t like Tate at all. The old Tate, my Tate, would have stomped up to me with a serious look and had words with me. Like, “What are you doing?” or, “you know you’re leading him on,” but not this Tate. He was actually laughing. I was intrigued to say the least. I glanced his way and nodded my head. Then I sat back with my friends, ready to get an ear full.
“Hell if I know. Actually right now, I am feeling so good, I could ‘do the deed’ with Tate.” I peered at all of them under my long eyelashes. They had shocked expressions on their faces, but they knew me better than that.
“What? I mean why not? I’m feeling pretty good, and he is pretty gorgeous. Might as well…no strings attached.” I was smiling now.
“Shit Reese, are you crazy? What has gotten in to you? Sit down you hussy before you get us thrown out of here.” I was laughing now.
“Damn Chloe, I would think you would be up here dancing with me…you know?” I was glaring at her now. I was also realizing how much of a potty mouth I got when I had too much to drink. Shit.
“I have a reputation to uphold.” Chloe said, and we all about spit our drinks out. “I do…I only get freakin drunk way out of town, not here this close to Penderton. Haven’t you noticed that by now?”
“Okay, I guess maybe that’s true. But, since when do you care what you do here? You’re usually the crazy one.” I said.
“Not tonight sista. Tate hasn’t taken his eyes off of you since he came in. Why don’t you up your odds and go to him?” Chloe said, half teasing me, and changing the subject off of her.
“Okay then…watch this.” I said getting up.
“I’m just kidding…” Chloe was trying to finish, but I was out of earshot.
Walking…change that…slinking up to Tate, I was conscious of how much he was eyeing me, and ever so suspiciously. I licked my bottom lip. Oh shit, I was really drunk. Two glasses of wine, and basically three shots of tequila had taken me by surprise. I guess I should have figured I would get shitfaced. Somehow, my worries and insecurities went away with my pee…right down the toilet. Which is what I had to do now, I had to go to the bathroom. So, instead of stopping at Tate, I passed him on my way to the bathroom.
After I took care of things, I was staring at myself in the mirror. My vision was a little blurred, but it was clear enough to try to fluff my hair, and rub away the wandering mascara underneath my eyes. I was a little tipsy…no doubt. It was a good feeling though. Tipsy I didn’t mind. Drunk…always got me sick.
I was coming out of the bathroom, zipping my purse, when I heard a throat clear.
“Reese.” I turned to see Tate…oh shit, my Tate. He was leaning against the door frame, looking sexy as hell. “Um, Can I see you a minute?”
Well, I’ll be damned. Could he see me a minute? Of course…hell, I was up to making out with him. I turned around to face him, almost losing my balance. “Of course Tate.” I walked up to him…entirely too close. We were in the back hall, and my chest was resting against his. Oh shit…I was laughing inside. I guess I was a little drunk, not just tipsy. “Is this seeing you enough?” I chuckled. His eyes were big. Then I kissed him…hard. And pulling back I said “Or is that close enough?” Dang he tasted good.
“Shit Reese. How drunk are you? Are you okay?” Tate was worried for me…how cute.
“Oh I’m fine big boy…how about you? That was nice, that kiss, can I do it again?” and before he could answer, my lips were on his. His breathing was fast and labored. His body was quivering. I took it as an initiative to feel of his waist and his backside. That’s when his breath caught. Oops.
He pushed me back gently. “Reese, I think I should take you home.” Tate said rather firmly.
“Nah, I’m having too much fun. Why don’t you come over and hand out, I mean hang out with us lushes. We could use some male hormones to even up the score.” I have no idea what I just said, but it sounded good to me. He chuckled a little, so it must have made some sense right?
“Okay Reese. I would love to hang out with you a little while,” he said still laughing. What?
“Well don’t do me any favors Mr. Taaate” I drug his name out. His hand was on my hip now. I guess he thought he was keeping me steady. I thought, oh shit, this feels so good.
His face got a little concerned looking, “Reese, are you okay? Maybe I really should take you home.” Tate said looking back at my table of friends.
“Oh you would like that wouldn’t you? Well, guess what cowboy, I would like that too, you know,” and I slapped his face softly a couple of times with my hand.
“I don’ think I’ve ever seen you this way Reese. Maybe you should eat something, and drink a LOT of water.” Tate said, starting to be a buzz kill, dang, I mean a drunk kill, by sounding all grown up.
“You don’t like me this way Taaate?” I said, smiling, I guess more like cheezing at him.
“Oh, god girl.” He said looking down at me with sultry eyes. “I love you this relaxed Reese, I really do.” He drew in a deep breath. “But I’m sure you don’t want to be sick tomorrow. Besides, I’m looking forward to our lunch and ice-skating date.” He said with a cute grin, squeezing my waist with his hands.
“Awwe, well aren’t you the sweet one.” Then I suddenly got serious again. My emotions were C-R-A-Z-Y. I pushed Tate up against the wall with my hands flat on his chest. “I have missed you Tate, Have you missed me? Wait, don’t answer that. Just kiss me…I mean really kiss me.” Then I dove in for his mouth. I think I remember his sharp intake of breath, then I remembered maybe it wasn’t best if I closed my eyes. The room was spinning. I guess he noticed.
Holding me back a little Tate said, “Reese, please eat something.” I saw him nod at someone while my face was turned into his chest. He was walking me over to a nearby barstool. “Here, they brought you a basket of bread and some ice water. Please…it will help you.” I was thinking how he was probably right. I guess I was hungry. I hadn’t eaten since my coffee this morning, except for a few pieces of fudge and cookies my mom and I had made earlier. Looking up at Tate I noticed he looked a little flustered, “Hey, stay here…I’ll be right back.” Okay, I thought. But as soon as he walked away, I slowly walked back to the booth my girls were in. They were laughing, until I walked up.
“Reese, we saw you with Tate. Maybe you should stay here with us, I don’t know if you will be happy with any decisions you make tonight. You, like us, aren’t thinking straight.” Elle said. I might be mistaken, but I think she basically slurred it all out.
“I’m fine girls. First time I’ve been this fine in a long time.” I chuckled out loud. Then out of the corner of my eye I saw Tate. He was whispering into someone’s…shit! It was Lisa. He was leaning over her in deep conversation. He looked serious… I made a loud ‘Humph’ sound. Well, two can play at this game. I looked around the room…oops, a little too quickly, I might add. I guess it took my eyes longer to catch up with my head turning. Maybe I should slow down. Finally my eyes latched onto the other waiter who had danced with me earlier. He was looking at me too. I motioned for him to come over.
“What are you doing Reese? I’m not sure this is a good idea.” I was glad they knew what I was up to. They saw me watching Tate too. “You guys aren’t together remember? I know it still hurts to see him with her, but don’t do anything you would regret, okay? Maura said in a low voice.
“Awwe, you don’t need to worry. I’m just upping the ante.” Waiter guy had come back now and was standing beside me, staring.
I said “Hey…” and he filled in the pause with his name.
“Michael” he said huskily.
“Hey Michael,” what are you doing tonight? Us girls are having a Playdate…oops, I guess I shouldn’t call it that to a guy…you might get the wrong idea.” I said as I winked at Michael.
I heard Chloe say “Oh Shit…here we go”.
“Now Chloe, don’t be such a prude. It doesn’t become you…I learned from the best you know.” Now I was winking at Chloe. Man I was feeling dizzy…way dizzy.
“Anyway Mi-chael, want to slow dance?” There was a slow song playing. I couldn’t remember the singer, but it sounded like Wild Thing by Ton-Loc. Dang, could I have picked a better song to
show off?
“Um, sure thing babe,” he said. I cringed when he called me babe, but he was pretty cute. Luckily, our booth wasn’t in front of the regular dining customers. The bar area was well separated from it. We were slowly moving and grinding, his front to my back, and I had my arm caressing his neck. He was grinning, I could feel it. I could hear my friends distantly joking, ‘that’s enough Reese’ but I was oblivious. My thoughts were scrambled. I somehow felt eyes boring into me…Tate’s. He had a seriously mean look on his face. Then he was coming closer.
“Hey dude, I’ve got it from here,” he said to Michael.
“Well, dude, she asked me to dance with her…so she would have to make that call.” Michael said matter-of-factly.
“You and I both know she isn’t capable of deciding that…now back off! Besides, you’re supposed to be working, not fondling the patrons.”
Michael backed away hands up in front of him as if to say ‘whatever’. “Reese, come sit down please.” Tate was sincere again. Man could he go from mad to sweet quickly. This I certainly remembered from when he used to be so over-possessive.
“Spoken like a man who thinks he can own someone.” He was raking his hand through his hair.
“You won’t remember any of this tomorrow Reese, but I’m not that person anymore. I don’t want to be that jealous, insecure guy....although if we were still together, that would have totally taken me to the edge.” He was pointing to where I was just ‘dancing’ with Michael.
“Well, lover boy, if we were still together, that,” I pointed to where he had been talking with Lisa, “would have pushed me over the edge!”
Tate’s eyes shot back and forth from me to Lisa. “Oh, so now I get it.” He looked pleased with himself like he knew now why I was acting this way. “Well, Lisa was asking if I could eat dinner with her, I told her no, she wasn’t taking it so well. I haven’t seen her in a long time. I guess she was surprised to see me here.”