Pride and Joy

by M. L. Rice

  She smiled and relaxed almost fully into her friends’ embrace.

  Almost.

  Nothing would take the sting away from losing her parents…

  *

  “I can’t do it.”

  “Yes, you can. You’ll always regret it if you didn’t know for sure.” Jennifer patted Bryce’s knee as they sat in the car.

  Bryce looked nervously at her house through the side window.

  “It seemed pretty obvious.”

  “I know, but this is the last opportunity you’re going to have before you leave next week.”

  Bryce took a deep breath. “Okay. But I’m scared shitless.”

  Jennifer smiled kindly. “I didn’t say it would be easy.”

  Bryce got out of the car and made her way purposefully to the front door. She rang the doorbell and felt a mixture of relief and fear when both of her parents opened it.

  They didn’t invite her in.

  “Mom? Dad?”

  “Bryce,” they said as one.

  She hesitated. “I’m…I’m leaving for the academy next week and…I just can’t leave things like they are with you guys.” Despite her best efforts to fight them, tears welled up in her eyes. “I love you both so much.”

  Her mother made a move to embrace her, but stopped short. “Bryce, don’t you know how much we love you too? Why do you think we’re doing this?”

  Bryce shook her head in disbelief. “You’re cutting me off because you love me?”

  Her mother turned and buried her face in her husband’s side as she sobbed. Bryce’s father spoke. “We just want you to know that there are consequences to your decisions. This is what happens when you make the wrong one. Your mother and I will always be here for you when you decide to turn your life around and come back to God and to us.”

  Bryce’s fingernails pressed painfully into her palms as she balled her fists in anger. “I don’t understand what you’re doing, Dad. I don’t understand any of this.”

  He shook his head sadly, but it was her mother who turned to her and answered. “Bryce, we have given you everything. You’ve wanted for nothing. Everything you have ever done has made us the proudest parents in the world. You were the perfect daughter. And now look at what you’ve done. You’ve chosen to be an abomination. You’ve chosen sin over your own family.” The next words came out in a staccato of grief. “We. Are. Ashamed.”

  Bryce couldn’t find words.

  Sobbing, her mother said one final thing. “You have a choice, Bryce. When you make the right one, come home to us.” She placed her hand over her chest. “You have broken my heart.”

  The door closed slowly.

  The sound of it latching shut and the lock being turned into place echoed as loudly as an explosion in Bryce’s ears.

  She turned around and walked in a stupor back to Jennifer’s waiting car.

  She didn’t have to say anything.

  *

  Bryce lounged on the couch in Arati’s basement. She had slept at Jennifer’s house for a few days and was now staying with Arati to make things fair. Arati was away with her parents for the day, on a shopping spree to buy decorations for her dorm room at CalTech, and it was Saturday so Bryce had the day off from work at the pool. She stared at the number on her phone, trying to get up the courage to call. She was hesitant because Amanda was a stranger, but she also knew she needed to talk to someone who could really understand what she was going through.

  She pressed the number and Amanda answered within one ring.

  “Hello?”

  “Oh. Hey. Um. This is Bryce Montgomery. From the Path of the Covenant meeting.”

  There was a pause before she heard a surprised “Oh! Hey, Bryce! How are you?”

  “Actually, things are kind of shitty with me.” Bryce explained everything. “So anyway, I just wanted to know if that had happened to you or anyone you know. Is it normal? Is this how parents normally react? I thought you might understand, so I thought I’d call.”

  “That sucks, Bryce. I am so sorry. But no, I’m still living at home. It’s hard sometimes, but I don’t think my parents have any intentions of disowning me. They’re not happy that I stopped going to PoC, but at this point we all just kind of ignore each other. I’ll be a senior next year and then off to college. I think we’re all looking forward to that.”

  “Oh.” Bryce realized then that she was one of the unlucky ones. Why couldn’t she have parents that loved her for who she was? Or at the very least tolerated her?

  “I’m sorry, Bryce. But it could be worse.”

  “How could it be worse?”

  “Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but remember Benji from the meeting?”

  “No, which one was he?”

  “The little kid whose parents thought he was too effeminate.”

  “Oh yeah. He made me really sad.” Bryce remembered how scared and confused he had looked.

  There was a pause before Amanda continued, “He killed himself last week.”

  Shock jolted through Bryce. “What?”

  “Yeah, he was despondent over how he was treated both by bullies at school, and by his own parents at home. He was told he was worthless and he believed it.” Amanda sounded furious. “He stole all of his mother’s sleeping pills and…well, went to sleep.”

  “Oh my God, what did his parents do? What did Mrs. Coulson say?”

  “Well, I don’t know about his parents. I hope they feel like shit, though! But Luis is the one who told me about the whole thing and he said that Mrs. Coulson acted like she was sad about it, but she takes no responsibility for it. Bullshit!” Amanda spat.

  Bryce didn’t know what to say. Poor Benji had been made to feel so disgusting and awful by the people who were supposed to love him the most. The thought could barely even register with her, despite how she had been treated by her own parents.

  “What’s wrong with people?” Bryce asked softly.

  “You got me. I don’t get it either. So anyway, I’m sure I was absolutely no help at all, especially with news like this.”

  “No, you helped to put things into perspective for me. I appreciate it.”

  “Well, just stay strong. I know you’re good at that,” Amanda said with admiration.

  “It’s hard, but you’re right. We can get through this BS and have happy lives. I’m sure of it. Anyway, thanks for talking to me. You take care, all right?”

  “Thanks for calling. And thanks again for giving me the courage to get out of that group. I’m so much happier now!”

  “No problem.”

  “Bye, Bryce.”

  Bryce ended the call and immediately dialed Leah’s number. They might not be a couple anymore, but she needed to talk to her friend. She only had a few days left in Saltus, and she wanted to make every moment count with everyone who still loved her. Her heart warmed knowing that despite all that had happened, she still had the best support group she could hope for in her friends. She was going to be okay. She was stronger than she had ever dreamed she could be.

  *

  “Why is it that I’m so nervous now?” Bryce couldn’t stop wringing her hands.

  “That’s a silly question. You know you’re ready to go.” Leah smiled and put her hands over Bryce’s.

  Jennifer sniffed and wiped her nose with a tissue. “I just can’t believe it’s time. Everything went by so fast.”

  “Promise you’ll keep in touch. I mean it. Don’t make me come up there and embarrass you in front of all of the hot Coast Guard guys in those awesome uniforms.” Arati playfully slapped her shoulder. “Wait…that doesn’t sound too bad actually…”

  Bryce laughed. “You guys really have no idea how much I’m going to miss you.”

  Jennifer scoffed. “You’ll be too busy to miss us. You’re going to one of the best schools in the country you know. Plus add to that all of the running, jumping, push-up boot-campy stuff.”

  “Jenn, you’re not helping.” Butterflies had started dancing in
her stomach again. “What if I can’t do it?”

  To her surprise all three of her friends laughed as one, but it was Arati who said, “The Great Bryce Montgomery? Not able to do something? Not possible.”

  Bryce threw herself at her friends, who embraced her warmly.

  She would not cry, damn it. If she started she wouldn’t be able to stop, and no one wanted to sit next to a loud, snotty mess on a plane for four hours.

  “You’d better go. You’ll miss your flight,” Jennifer said into Bryce’s ponytail.

  Bryce pulled herself away from her friends and couldn’t help casting a small glance over her friends’ shoulders, hoping desperately that her parents had changed their minds and had come to see her off and wish her well as she started this new part of her life.

  They weren’t there. She knew they would never be there again.

  No. No Tears.

  “I love you guys. I’ll call when I get there.”

  She lifted her two bags over her shoulder and turned around. She heard her friends sniffling as she walked forward and crossed the threshold of the airport alone.

  PART TWO

  Chapter Fourteen

  Bryce Lee Montgomery, graduating with high honors, U.S. Coast Guard Cutter Gossett, Seattle Washington…”

  Even though two and half years had passed since hearing those words, Bryce still smiled as she remembered her U.S. Coast Guard Academy graduation day. She did this occasionally as she was getting ready for another long day of duty, reveling in the fact that she had realized her dream. She wouldn’t let herself forget what she had been through to get where she currently was. Four years of grueling but fulfilling work at the academy had prepared her for her current position as an officer in the United States Coast Guard. Her parents hadn’t attended her graduation, of course. She hadn’t spoken to them in years, actually. She regretted having had to cut ties with almost everyone in Saltus. She missed her family. She missed Daniela. She missed her high school. But it didn’t matter (or she told herself that it didn’t). Leah, Arati, and Jennifer had all been there to celebrate her commissioning, and it was their pride in her accomplishments that would always mean the world to her.

  She still talked with all three of them regularly and they even met up for a girls’ weekend somewhere new each year. New York City, Orlando, Santa Fe, etc. Of course, Bryce’s duties made scheduling difficult, but they always managed to get together without fail. These last two years Leah had even brought her girlfriend along. They had met at SSU and Bryce couldn’t help but like her. She was one of the nicest people Bryce had ever met and she knew that Leah had found her perfect match. She had felt an initial, brief pang of jealousy, but she realized that it was because somewhere in the back of her mind, she still longed for a relationship of her own.

  She had undertaken her time at the academy with her usual single-mindedness that led her to rise to the top percentile of her class, and because of this, she had her pick of assignments. However, she hadn’t made many close friends there, preferring to keep most of her interactions professional, but still friendly enough. After what she had been through during her last months in Texas, she had wanted nothing more than to immerse herself into her schooling, and now she was doing the same thing in her career as a U.S. Coast Guard Lieutenant, Junior Grade.

  She also hadn’t wanted to fall for someone while at school, but she hadn’t been without offers. She’d had to turn down the male cadets at the academy right and left. Her good looks had been somewhat of a hindrance to her progress until, after several months of men trying to get into her uniform pants, she finally came out as a lesbian by joining the campus gay-straight alliance, the first of its kind in any military academy. Of course, she had a female cadet or three hit on her after that, and that had proven to be much more difficult to resist. She did have a thing for women in uniform, after all. She had enjoyed a brief romantic relationship with her roommate during her second year, but they both found that it was too much of a distraction to their studies, so they’d broken up and settled back into normal friendship. She had refused to put herself in any kind of position that would jeopardize all she had worked so hard to achieve.

  Now, a couple of years later, she was still stationed aboard the Medium Endurance Cutter Gossett based out of Seattle with only a couple of brief stints in between at various training schools. She was the training officer as well as the boarding officer for her cutter and she regularly took her team on inspection boardings of various vessels around Puget Sound and the Pacific Ocean. She loved it. Most of the boardings were noneventful and she and her fellow Coasties didn’t find anything of interest (drugs, smuggled goods, threats to security, trafficked human beings, etc.), but occasionally they would stop a drug runner or save the lives of sailors in distress and all of the training she had endured would kick in, helping to keep herself, her team, and the U.S. waterways safe.

  Because of her by-the-book and logical approach to doing her duty, she was never the life of any off-duty parties, but she was the first one the commander would approach to get something done right the first time. She was a trusted and invaluable asset to her crew and even though she was nice, fair, and the crew liked her, she always kept everyone at a professional distance.

  Work made her happy. She told herself she didn’t need a relationship at this point in her life anyway. She was far too busy serving at sea and developing her career. Every now and again she would drift off to thoughts of her time with Leah or have frivolous imaginings about a couple of her fellow female crewmembers, but she never acted on anything. She had turned herself into a “Coast Guard nun,” just like Jennifer had predicted.

  Maybe in a year or two, when she was more comfortable with her position as a junior officer in charge of human lives, maybe then she could set aside some time for a personal life.

  Maybe.

  Bryce laced up her boots quickly and stood in front of the small mirror in the cabin she shared with another female officer. She ran fingers through blond hair that was now only chin length. After arriving at the academy it hadn’t taken her long to figure out that having shorter hair was going to make her life a lot easier in the military. At first she had thought she would be sad to see her long locks go, but when the barber had chopped them off she had felt like a new person.

  New hair.

  New life.

  New Bryce.

  It still suited her all these years later. So did the uniform. Her gaze traveled down to look at the blue operational dress uniform she wore almost every day of her life aboard ship. Many of her other shipmates complained about having to wear the same thing all the time, but she loved it. And she looked damn good in it, if she did say so herself.

  She turned to the calendar on the wall and marked off day 176. Her cutter had been on a lengthy mission up near Alaska for 150 of those days and was now back in the waters of their homeport of Seattle, waiting to finish up their 190-day deployment.

  Almost everyone on the ship was starting to get homesick, but Bryce could have stayed out on the open water for months, years even. It was her home, and her devotion to her duty meant that she never wanted to be anywhere else.

  *

  “Lieutenant Montgomery.” Commander Hendricks’s voice crackled through her radio as she readied the boarding team to lower their quick response boat into the choppy sea.

  “Sir?”

  “Be careful out there today. There’s more traffic for this kind of weather than I’d prefer.”

  Bryce looked at the water around her, what she could see of it. It wasn’t too dangerous to do security boardings, but rain fell heavily, and the morning fog had yet to burn off. Visibility wasn’t the best at the moment and she couldn’t see any other vessels in the vicinity other than the offshore fishing boat they were currently trailing. Even with the foul weather, this was probably going to be another noneventful mission. She would have to make sure there were no drugs or weapons on board, inspect safety gear, check the logs, check permits, etc.
Still, she felt the familiar tingle of adrenaline that she got every time her team prepared for a boarding. It had been several weeks since their last major bust and Bryce was itching for some excitement.

  “Aye, sir.”

  The boat slid into the water and the coxswain pulled away, leaving the cutter behind as he sped toward their target. Bryce couldn’t help but smile as the small boat leapt over the rolling waves. This never got old.

  The fishing vessel emerged from the fog as they approached on its starboard side. Bryce’s boat matched its speed and pulled alongside as she hailed the vessel’s skipper.

  “Good morning, Skipper. My name is Officer Montgomery with the U.S. Coast Guard. We’re here to do a boarding today to ensure that you’re in compliance with all federal laws.”

  The man glanced around. “Okay.”

  “Without reaching for or touching them, do you have any weapons on board?”

  “No, ma’am.”

  Bryce gave him a quick nod, then motioned for her team to board the vessel. Two fishermen on deck helped them over the gunwale. The inspection of this relatively small fishing boat would probably take no more than an hour and a half. Maybe they could get a few more inspections in today—if no search and rescue cases came up instead, that is.

  Bryce moved to the side of the larger vessel and was about to start her climb when she heard shouts simultaneously from her coxswain and team members who were already onboard the fishing vessel. Startled, she looked behind her. A recreational powerboat, way too far away from shore in this weather, had just appeared through the rain and fog and was speeding toward them perpendicular to their starboard side. Bryce jumped away from the fishing vessel and back into her own boat as the coxswain made the split-second decision to immediately throttle down to avoid collision. They didn’t have the time or room to attempt to steer away from the powerboat. She fell forward heavily onto the deck as her Coast Guard boat slowed with a jolt.