Nothing to Lose

by Angela Winters

  “Just let the private investigator do all the work from now on,” Billie advised. “Legally, you’re really crossing a line.”

  “Worth it,” Sherise said. “Besides, no one can say I wasn’t really trying out that club. D.C. is a small city. People in legal disputes come across each other all the time.”

  “Sherise, you’re not taking me seriously!” Billie yelled.

  There was an awkward silence for the moment it took Billie to realize that she’d yelled at her friend.

  “Sorry,” she said. “I’m just upset.”

  “Michael still isn’t calling you back?” Erica asked.

  “No.” Billie put down her fork, never having had an appetite, anyway. “And Tara is gone. She’s back in Detroit, where I can’t reach her, and she hates me.”

  “She doesn’t hate you,” Sherise said. “From what happened, Porter came off looking as bad as you.”

  “I think she expected better from me,” Billie said.

  “That’s not fair,” Erica added.

  “It’s how it is,” Billie answered back. “Porter is her dad. He’s her parent. She has to forgive him. She needs his love and approval.”

  “She feels the same about you,” Erica assured her. “She’ll calm down. She’s an emotional teenager. Everything that happens is the end of the world.”

  “But I won’t be there when she calms down,” Billie said. “Porter will, and he’ll poison her against me.”

  “Forget Porter for now,” Sherise said. “You need to figure out how to get Michael to respond to you. Go to his home.”

  “I can’t do that,” Billie said. “Can I?”

  “That’s a little desperate,” Erica said. “They’ve only dated for about a month, right?”

  Sherise sighed. “Frightened little girls never get what they want. You two are ridiculous. Fine, if you’re too scared to go right to him, then you’ve got to run into him by accident, but on purpose.”

  “I tried that,” Billie said. “I went to the CEO’s office and basically bribed his admin to find out when Michael was going to be at the office again for any meetings. He rescheduled all his meetings to be at his office, not at the company.”

  “Wow,” Erica said. “He’s really avoiding you.”

  “Thanks,” Billie said. “That makes me feel a lot better.”

  “So find out where he goes socially,” Sherise offered. “Find out where he shops. Didn’t you ever talk about the things he likes to do? Track him down there.”

  “What do I say?” Billie asked.

  “Do you really want him?” Erica asked.

  “Of course I do,” she said. “Why do you think I’m going through this?”

  “I mean, do you really, really want him?” Erica asked again. “Or do you just want him to get with the program?”

  Billie knew what Erica meant. She’d placed too much blame on Michael for his inability to understand the dynamic between her and Porter. She’d wanted him to get behind her and support this ridiculous vendetta she had.

  “I really want him,” Billie said. “No more games. I get it now. I felt something really special with him. I was falling in love, and I know he was too. I want him more than I want anything else, including hurting Porter.”

  “Then you’ll know what to say,” Erica said, “as soon as you see him.”

  “This isn’t a romance novel,” Sherise observed. “You better prepare your shit, girl.”

  Billie found a way to laugh at Sherise being Sherise, making her feel a little better.

  “I’ll make it happen,” she said, only hopeful she could.

  “This will be great,” Sherise said. “I’ll deal with that bitch, Elena, and Justin and I will be back on track. You’ll get back with Michael. And we can all focus on getting Erica laid.”

  “Leave me out of this,” Erica said.

  “What about Alex?” Billie asked. “You still mad at him for giving Terrell that money?”

  “That was a good thing,” Sherise said. “Don’t hold it against him.”

  “You don’t understand,” Erica said.

  “We know you like him,” Sherise said, “so stop trying to front. Why aren’t you moving faster with him?”

  “I didn’t tell you?” Erica asked, even though she knew she hadn’t. She would have to get around to it at some point. “We kissed.”

  After hearing the gasps, Erica went on to tell the story of Alex’s visit the other day, ending with her making him leave and agreeing to let go of the issue of him helping Jonah bribe Terrell.

  “What was wrong?” Billie asked. “Was he a bad kisser?”

  “No,” Erica said. “The kiss itself was good, but—”

  “But what?” Sherise asked.

  “I don’t think . . .” Erica sighed. “I don’t know. I think I just let Jonah get into my head, and he’s against Alex and me—”

  “Who gives a shit what Jonah wants?” Sherise asked.

  “Obviously, she does,” Billie answered. “I think there’s more to it, Erica. Are you not telling us, or do you just not know yourself?”

  “I think its Jonah.” Erica sat up on the sofa. “Between him, Terrell, and that damn Juliet accusing my mother of—”

  “Let’s not go there again,” Sherise interjected.

  “I can’t get it out of my mind,” Erica admitted.

  “Then confront him about it,” Billie said. “If this is blocking you, you need to deal with it. So you can move on with Alex.”

  “How would those two be related?” Sherise asked.

  “I don’t know that they are,” Erica said. “I mean, I think this whole thing with Alex is completely different.”

  “Since we’re all being so confrontational of late, literally and metaphorically,” Billie said, “I say, you go face Alex and tell him how you feel.”

  “What if I don’t know how I feel?” Erica asked. “What kind of lame shit is that?”

  “That’s exactly what he’s going to say,” Sherise said.

  “Maybe he’s experiencing the same thing,” Billie said. “Maybe getting it out on the table will help you both figure it out.”

  “Is it even that serious?” Sherise asked. “He’s just a boy. It’s just a kiss. One kiss, right?”

  “Yeah,” Erica said, “but I have a feeling he wants another one.”

  “Do you?” Billie asked.

  That was a question Erica couldn’t answer. Why couldn’t she? She wasn’t sure, but something was blocking her. She felt like her subconscious knew what it was, but her conscious self couldn’t grasp it.

  Alex didn’t deserve this. He was a good guy, who had done something he wasn’t comfortable with for—what he thought—was her sake. He deserved her honesty.

  Sitting on her bed, early on Friday morning, Sherise could barely contain herself. She was talking on the phone with Beth and had gotten a massive amount of information. Some of it made no sense, but she’d figure it out soon enough. What she could figure out was a gold mine, and she’d done it again.

  “Is there anything else?” Sherise hopped up from her bed and walked over to her dresser.

  “Isn’t that enough?” Beth asked.

  “You have no idea,” Sherise said, almost sounding giddy. “Put this all in a report and send it to me. I want all the originals you have. I want pictures, everything.”

  “What about Dennis?”

  “Dennis is unimportant at this point,” Sherise said as she reached for the red panties-and-bra set. She was feeling red today and only hoped she could still fit into them. “We have everything we need to get rid of Elena Brown.”

  “I’ll get that to you as soon as possible.”

  “Who are you talking to?”

  Sherise swung around from the dresser to see Justin standing in the doorway to the bedroom. Why was he still here?

  “I . . . I thought you left,” was all she could muster to say.

  “Who are you talking to?” he repeated, entering the room. There wa
s a suspicious look on his face. “I heard you say ‘Dennis and Elena.’ What was that... ‘Brown’?”

  “I have to go,” she said quickly into the phone before tossing it on the bed. “You were spying on me?”

  “I forgot my tablet,” he said, pointing to the device, which was sitting on the settee at the end of their bed. “Stop deflecting.”

  “I’m not deflecting,” she said. “I was just surprised.”

  “Jacob warned us, Sherise!”

  “I told you I was going to hire a private investigator,” she said.

  “And I told you not to,” he answered back. “Jacob told you not to. His firm is doing this on their own.”

  “They suck at it.” Sherise walked over to the settee and grabbed the tablet. Walking over to Justin, she handed it to him. “Here.”

  “Actually,” Justin said, “Jacob just called to tell me that he’s given the firm enough of a headache for them to want me back.”

  “Good,” Sherise said. “It was unjustified. They overreacted because of problems they’ve had in the past.”

  She reached out to hug him, but he backed away.

  “What were you talking about, Sherise?” he asked, sounding more forceful this time. “And don’t lie to me. I don’t want any of your sneaky shit.”

  “Okun Industries,” she said. “That was the account Dennis had that you took over because he had to go to rehab, right?”

  He nodded. “What does that have to do with this?”

  “It’s a toolmaking factory in Denton, Texas.”

  “So we’re doing trivia?” he asked, annoyed. “You’re pissing me off, Sherise.”

  “Baby,” she pleaded. “If you give me one day, I promise you, I will—”

  “No!” He halted her. “No secrets. Tell me what’s going on.”

  Sherise knew he was right. She would always have her games, but she couldn’t play any with him. He was her husband and the father of her children. There would be no more secrets. Well, no more from this day.

  “We need to get Elena alone,” she said.

  “To do what?” he asked skeptically. “We can’t harass her, Sherise.”

  “No, we need to get her somewhere neutral so we can meet her face-to-face.”

  “No.” Justin was backing out of the room. “That’s not going to happen. Not with me or with you. Get it out of your mind, now!”

  “You said you trusted me!” she called after him. “Do you?”

  He stopped, looking at her for a second before shaking his head. “What the fuck are you up to, Sherise?”

  “Do you?” she asked again.

  He looked her deep in the eyes, searching for something that Sherise hoped she could help him find. She didn’t blink, letting him take his time. He had to agree to this if it was going to work.

  “What do you need me to do?” he asked, sighing, sounding as if he was resigned to his fate with this woman.

  She rushed up to him and wrapped her arms around him. She kissed him hard on the lips and both cheeks. She leaned away, holding his face in her hands.

  “Together, we’re about to end this, baby,” she said gleefully. “In a big, big way.”

  When Erica entered Jonah’s office at the Pentagon, there were several people already there. A meeting had just completed and she was shuffled in before the rest of the team left. She recognized some of the people as having been part of his staff when she worked for Jonah. Seemed like ages, but really it wasn’t that long ago.

  Erica wasn’t in the mood to be polite, so she sat down in the chair on the opposite side of the desk and just waited, not bothering to speak to anyone.

  She had a lot on her mind. She’d been to work today, but she felt awkward around Alex after they had kissed. She said hello to him in passing, but she did her best to avoid him. It was childish, she knew, but she wasn’t yet sure what to make of that kiss and what to do about it. Besides, she was distracted from thoughts of it because of her issues with Jonah—issues that were too many to count. But for now, Erica would concentrate on his injection of Alex into their conflict with Terrell, and his bitch of a wife accusing her mother of being a home wrecker.

  Within a few minutes, everyone had left. Jonah stepped out to say a few words to his assistant; then he reentered the room, closing the door behind him.

  “I know what this is about,” he said, before even sitting down at his desk. “I know you’re upset about me sending Alex to pay Terrell. Alex told me. Honestly, Erica, I could try and appease you, but the truth is—”

  “The truth?” She laughed. “Do you even know what that word means?”

  He sat down, giving her a stern glance. “The truth is, I don’t care. I can’t allow my future, that of my family, and the people who have supported me all these years to be affected by a car washer.”

  “You say that like he’s not even worthy of mentioning,” Erica said. “He’s a human being.”

  “Just barely,” he mumbled back.

  Erica felt her blood boil. “The disregard with which you speak of some people is disgusting and borderline racist.”

  “Racist?” He seemed disappointed. “Trust me, I place value on people according to how they conduct themselves in their lives and their contribution to society. It has nothing to do with race.”

  “Just that some people are worth the respect of a human being and some aren’t,” Erica concluded for him.

  “Those are your words,” Jonah said.

  “Look,” Erica said, sighing, “this isn’t even about Terrell—even though I’m pissed you didn’t give me a chance to try and fix that myself. This is about Alex. How could you include him?”

  He looked at her; his expression seemed to note that she really cared.

  “He’s a good guy,” she continued. “You do things the way you do them. I get that.”

  “Do you?” he asked doubtfully.

  “But Alex isn’t like that.”

  “How well do you think you know him?” Jonah asked.

  “We’re friends, Jonah. I know him.”

  “Then you should know, he was eager to help me.”

  “He wasn’t eager,” she said. “He just made it seem that way because he didn’t want you to think you couldn’t count on him. He only did it because you lied to him about me being in danger.”

  Jonah shrugged. “Whatever the case, it’s done.”

  “You really don’t care who you trap in your web, do you?”

  Jonah laughed. “You’re being a bit dramatic. I don’t need to trap anyone. Besides, you’re the one who brought him into it, Erica. I told you to keep your distance from him, from a personal standpoint.”

  Erica rolled her eyes. “Are you on that again?”

  “It’s his closeness to you that allowed me to convince him so easily,” Jonah said. “So, can you just blame me?”

  “Yes, I can just blame you!” Erica couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

  “Are you involved with him or not?” Jonah asked, leaning forward on his desk.

  “Not,” she said, remembering their kiss and feeling uncomfortable. “We’re just friends, I told you. But I’m surprised you don’t want more. After all, the closer we get, the easier he’ll be for you to manipulate.”

  “I don’t need your help for that,” he said. “But despite your concern, Alex will be fine. You just don’t tell him anything he shouldn’t know and he won’t be compromised.”

  “I’m the one making all the compromises,” she said. “But I guess it would be a waste to even ask you to. You never keep your end of any of our bargains.”

  “If this works, and it better work,” he said, his face transforming to grave seriousness, “there will be no need for him to be involved for one second more.”

  “What is that worth?” she asked.

  He frowned, appearing offended for just one second. “Is that all, Erica? I’m very busy.”

  “No,” she answered. “Did your wife tell you about our last interaction?”


  “Why would you be interacting with her at all?” he asked.

  “She was at campaign headquarters a couple of weeks ago. She was drunk, by the way.”

  “You don’t have any proof of that.” He leaned back in his chair.

  “Really?” she asked, disbelieving his attitude. “I’m not the press, Jonah. Is that necessary?”

  “It’s best you keep your distance from her.”

  “I’ve tried to,” Erica exclaimed, “but she accused my mom of carrying on an affair with you after you were married.”

  Jonah immediately sat up straight. At first, he seemed offended by the suggestion; but then, Jonah appeared as if trying to figure something out.

  “Well?” Erica asked finally.

  “Tell me what happened,” he said. “That can’t have been all.”

  Erica replayed the conversation for him; she was heating up with anger all the while.

  “So, what are you going to do about it?” she asked. “I don’t care if she is a drunk. She can’t say things like that about my mom.”

  “Juliet is under a lot of stress right now,” he said. “She’s saying things she doesn’t mean, and she’s not a drunk.”

  “You said that you cared about my mother when you were together.”

  Jonah’s face grew very still and more serious. “I cared about Achelle very much. And, of course, there wasn’t anything between us after I left for the military.”

  “Well, you slept with someone,” Erica said, “and she almost divorced you over it.”

  “That’s none of your concern,” Jonah said. “Now, if you’ll let me get back to—”

  “It is my concern!” Erica stood up from her chair. “My mother deserves more respect than that. You need to clear it up, now!”

  “Don’t give me orders,” Jonah warned. “And sit down.”

  Erica stood where she was, folding her arms across her chest.

  “I’m serious, Jonah. I don’t care what that woman thinks of me, but I’m not having her think my mother was your mistress.”

  “You’re right,” he said, nodding. “I’ll clear it up with her.”